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Some encouragement for those with older bedwetters


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Nathan, 9, has gone three weeks without wetting the bed. Two of the weeks he was still wearing a pull-up. The last week he wore only underwear.

 

My dad and my husband were both late bed-wetters.

 

I started a little game where I would give him a dime each morning he awoke dry. We have changed nothing. I guess it is just his time.

 

I just wanted to offer this as hope because I know we have had several conversations about older bed-wetters. :D

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My older son was 8 by the time he was reliably dry at night. Honestly, I thought he would NEVER get it...then his brother (who was 4 at the time) potty trained reliably at night and after that, my older son worked harder and did the same. His was "competition" with his brother, IMO...and I hate to say it, but before that, I think it was just sheer laziness. He knew it was coming, but waking up wet didn't bother him until his brother stopped doing it...

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Guest janainaz

My son, Noah, is 9 and he still wets the bed on occasion. From the time he was out of diapers until he was 8, he never had a dry night - ever. A year ago he suddenly started growing out of it, it had nothing to do with him being lazy or anything he could control whatsoever. He has always been such a deep sleeper he can't be woken up.

 

It seems that when he's overtired he sleeps so deep that he wakes up wet. But, now he'll wake up on his own, like right after it happens. I have never made a big deal out of it and have always let him know that it's just his body and sleeping patterns. I've read about it and there are varying opinions medical-wise of why kids wet the bed. Some say it has to do with them sleeping on the REM cycle too long - that they do not have normal sleep cycles. Another theory had to do with hormones and the fact that their body does not slow down urine production at night like it should.

 

I have to ask why you offer a reward at all for dry nights? I'm asking because I look at that from a child's perspective and it communicates a message that they have control and choice in it. To me, that sends a mixed message - it's the opposite of disciplining them for it. I have never offered my son a reward for waking up dry because he can't help it.

 

This last year has been so much better. We went from bedwetting 99.9% of the time to about 10% of the time. So, I see that something is changing in his body. I was a bed-wetter until I was 8 and both his uncles were major bed-wetters. My other son has wet the bed maybe twice and he's four. He talks in his sleep all night long and is just complete opposite of Noah.

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I have to ask why you offer a reward at all for dry nights? I'm asking because I look at that from a child's perspective and it communicates a message that they have control and choice in it. To me, that sends a mixed message - it's the opposite of disciplining them for it. I have never offered my son a reward for waking up dry because he can't help it.

 

Nathan was getting very excited when he went a few days dry. I had told him before when he went two weeks without wetting his pull-up, he could start wearing underwear to bed. I also mentioned that it was great he was saving us money on pull-ups. So, I told him that since a pull-up cost about 25 cents (maybe more), I would give him a dime everytime he saved us a quarter. It was a fun thing. It was exciting for him.

 

Even months ago, I had mentioned the boys getting a dime everytime they saved us the cost of a pull-up -- there were nights here and there that they didn't wet. When they did wet, they were never disappointed that they didn't get a dime. It was really all in fun. I have always assured them that there is nothing wrong with them, that I know they don't intentionally wet and that Daddy wet late in life as well.

 

I'm sorry that bothered you.

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Dawn,

 

Thank you so much for your encouraging report. My middle son will be 7 soon and soaks his pull-up every night. Our pediatrician has assured us that it is a developmental issue and we just have to get it time. He continually has a rash on his upper thigh from the wetness. :( He also is such a deep sleeper that he often has wet his pull-up an hour or two after falling asleep. That's after limiting liquids for hours before bed and going to the bathroom the minute before crawling into bed.

 

We have just ordered the alarm that wakes the child up when it senses wetness. I'm not sure when we will try to start using it, but I have heard very positive stories about using it.

 

Hurray for your Nathan!

 

Heather

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We have just ordered the alarm that wakes the child up when it senses wetness. I'm not sure when we will try to start using it, but I have heard very positive stories about using it.

 

 

 

Heather

 

Heather-

I had that alarm when I was a child. I quickly learned how to disable it in my sleep (and wouldn't even remember doing so), so it didn't work for me! I hope it works for your child though. :001_smile:

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Guest janainaz
Nathan was getting very excited when he went a few days dry. I had told him before when he went two weeks without wetting his pull-up, he could start wearing underwear to bed. I also mentioned that it was great he was saving us money on pull-ups. So, I told him that since a pull-up cost about 25 cents (maybe more), I would give him a dime everytime he saved us a quarter. It was a fun thing. It was exciting for him.

 

Even months ago, I had mentioned the boys getting a dime everytime they saved us the cost of a pull-up -- there were nights here and there that they didn't wet. When they did wet, they were never disappointed that they didn't get a dime. It was really all in fun. I have always assured them that there is nothing wrong with them, that I know they don't intentionally wet and that Daddy wet late in life as well.

 

I'm sorry that bothered you.

 

:) It didn't bother me, I was just curious as to the idea behind that. What you explained makes sense and I see the lightheartedness and fun in it.

 

I got in huge trouble when I was little for wetting the bed and I know that for many parents, it was the norm. It seems there was a lot of ignorance about bed-wetting back then. I do cringe when I hear that parents hold kids responsible for it - I don't really buy into the idea that it's laziness. That irks me. I don't think a normal child will purposely lay in bed and pee. It just does not make sense.

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:) It didn't bother me, I was just curious as to the idea behind that. What you explained makes sense and I see the lightheartedness and fun in it.

 

I got in huge trouble when I was little for wetting the bed and I know that for many parents, it was the norm. It seems there was a lot of ignorance about bed-wetting back then. I do cringe when I hear that parents hold kids responsible for it - I don't really buy into the idea that it's laziness. That irks me. I don't think a normal child will purposely lay in bed and pee. It just does not make sense.

 

I agree with you. Don't we moms do so much comparing. To me, so much is about readiness and just plain biological differences. My boys were slow to get teeth and slow to lose them. Ben didn't really talk until he was 3 years old, Nathan 9 or 10 months. I think when are children are slower, we get nervous, and then others make us insecure.

 

My husband did admit that when he was older and still wetting the bed, if he awoke to himself starting to wet, he wouldn't get up and go to the bathroom. But, no, I don't think children enjoy sleeping in wet diapers/underwear.

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I had a stubborn nightwetter. I found drinking milk to be a culpit. However, we didn't have permanent success until I began giving ds a few spoonfuls of honey before going to sleep for a week or two. Recommended by a friend and it worked wonders.

 

We had tried the alarm and by then gone back to pull-ups. Ds was around 10 or more when he stopped.

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