38carrots Posted November 16, 2016 Share Posted November 16, 2016 I recently learned that DD's former coach is "warning" people who hang out with DD about her and "the mother" (me lol). I don't know the details--I don't know what she is warning about and to how many people. The person who told me is a good friend, and she was "warned" several months ago. She claims she defended DD and withdrew from the conversation, and I believe her. DD and myself parted way with this coach over 2 years ago, when I didn't agree with the direction the coach was taking with DD. We also had a small copy-right dispute around the same time when she took my images of other people without my permission and used them for commercial purposes. I heard this only from one friend, but in retrospect I see that she must have talked negatively about DD and / or myself (she talks about us a "unit") to at least two other people in the sport community. (One example was one Mom being super friendly with me one day--we clicked on so many things--parenting, homeschooling, and so on and had such great conversations both expressing intent to meet up again, and ignoring me the next, while this coach was also in this facility.) Is this something I should bring up with the coach? With the professional organization? Am I right to think that while a client can be critical of a coach and mention this to others potential clients when asked, a coach has no business to "warn" her other clients about **associating** with her former clients? Or, should I be wise and just drop the whole thing? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Code Lyoko Posted November 16, 2016 Share Posted November 16, 2016 I'm not sure how confronting the coach will help. This is a former coach, right? Your child is not being coached by this person anymore and hasn't been for 2 years? While it is awful that this may be happening, I don't know what you can do about it except to just let people see you and your DD and judge for themselves as you go about your lives. Unless you think this is directly affecting how the current coach or the organization (are you still part of the same organization?) is dealing with your DD... In that case, yes I would go to the people in charge, not in a combative or angry or panicked way, but in a concerned way, and ask questions, express concerns. I don't know that it will do any good but it MIGHT help. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ali in OR Posted November 16, 2016 Share Posted November 16, 2016 I wouldn't do anything except to make sure my actions and words and how I treat people speak for themselves. If your current coach, teammates, parents know you and your dd to be positive contributors to the whole experience (of whatever activity), they won't pay any attention to whatever a former coach says. Former coach's words will then only cast doubt on former coach, not your family. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted November 16, 2016 Share Posted November 16, 2016 Wth?! I'd be mad but I'm not sure there is much you can do about it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seasider Posted November 16, 2016 Share Posted November 16, 2016 I'd think your best defense would be for you and dd to disprove accusations by your stellar conduct. Stirring up the conflict will get you nowhere. But I'm sorry this is happening to you and your daughter. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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