MrsBanjoClown Posted July 30, 2012 Share Posted July 30, 2012 DS7 took his Unit 1 Cumulative test today for Singapore 2A. He made a 100 on all 3 of his chapter tests, but made a 94 on his unit test. He got very upset about this. I tried to use it as a teachable moment and explain to him the need to check over his work and read carefully. After I showed him the two problems he missed, he got mad because he knew what the answer should have been. I explained to him that everyone makes mistakes and that a 94 is still a really good grade. He is such a perfectionist, yet he doesn't check over his work and rushes through things. I know that he is upset because I have a special "I made the grade!" plate that the boys get to eat off of when they make a 100 on a test, and this is the first test he hasn't made a 100 on. How do I let him know that it is ok to make a mistake while at the same time teach him that it is not ok to rush and be careless? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
EmmaNadine Posted July 30, 2012 Share Posted July 30, 2012 If you are only rewarding your children when they get a perfect score, you are either teaching or reinforcing his perfectionism. Have him go back and redo the problems he missed, but I would suggest not tying parental approval (in obvious ways such as special plates) be restricted to perfect performances. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
redsquirrel Posted July 30, 2012 Share Posted July 30, 2012 I would get rid of the plate, to start with. Then I would stop telling him his score for a few years. You are asking him to do two separate things at the same time. On the one hand you are showing a 7 year old that if he gets EVERYTHING correct you will give him a special reward. Then you point out his mistakes, let him know that he won't be getting the special reward....and you are asking him to be ok with it. That is an awful lot for a 7 year old to handle. You need to pick one of those two attitudes and go with it. He is a little guy and you are really asking a lot of him. The whole 'Try for 100, but be cool with 94" is something my rising 7th grader can cope with..with a few tears. But at 7? No way. As to how to deal with carelessness, first of all, expect it. It is part of life. I have my kids go back and work on what they missed and let them come to the realization that maybe they should have gone a little slower. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hoot Posted July 30, 2012 Share Posted July 30, 2012 If you are only rewarding your children when they get a perfect score, you are either teaching or reinforcing his perfectionism. Have him go back and redo the problems he missed, but I would suggest not tying parental approval (in obvious ways such as special plates) be restricted to perfect performances. :iagree: Before handing in his work to be graded, I would make sure that he sits with it to look it over for mistakes. Then, whether you let him see the grades at this stage or not, I would simply give him the missed problems again either the same day or later. With my 8th grader I make him fix errors the same day. With a younger one it might be better to wait. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsBanjoClown Posted July 30, 2012 Author Share Posted July 30, 2012 Thanks for the replies. I did show him the ones he missed, and he immediately knew what he did wrong and was able to correct them. After I talked with him about it he realized that he just needs to take his time be more focused next time. I think it's good that he self-evaluates and that he sees where he made a mistake and how to fix it next time. I just want to teach him that his reaction should not be pulling a fit because he didn't get what he wanted. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MrsBanjoClown Posted July 30, 2012 Author Share Posted July 30, 2012 I don't grade my dd (she's in 1st grade and I don't expect to start grading her until the state requires it) but when she makes mistakes I simply have her correct them. We talk about how an error was careless etc and approach it all as a teachable moment. Honestly, I always want her to get 100% correct, whether the first time through it or after some discussion. But I don't do grades/smiley faces and all of that. I want her to believe she should know it because she should know it. She sometimes still gets mad, but I approach all errors in a spirit of learning, not criticism. I completely agree with you. My kids started out in ps, so they want the grades and ask about them. The only things I actually grade are their math tests and spelling tests. Everything else is just discussed/corrected. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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