Homeschooling for the mom who doesn't like to teach

[mktyler]

I love talking to and being with my children. I love thinking about, organizing, and preparing courses and lessons. I love figuring out how to teach and what to teach.

 

I am awful at actually teaching regularly. I am an introvert; being with people wears me out, even if its people I love. All of my children (4, 2ds and 2dd) have developmental disorders: 2 with Asperger's, 3 with ADHD, 1 ODD, 1 apraxia, 2 depression, 2 anxiety disorder. This means I spend a lot of time informally and formally teaching emotional and social skills (ah, the irony of life). I have also had to focus most of my academic work on figuring out how to get them reading despite their various difficulties.

 

I have a great relationship with all of my kids - I have really worked hard at that. I feel we have a good family life despite the challenges.

 

I have been saved over the last few years by my son's autism treatment center and my friends who have schooled my girls 2 days a week. I have a passion for knowledge and we have many informal discussions about all sorts of topics.

 

However, things are changing: my son has "graduated" from his autism treatment and requires delicate handling, my oldest is entering her high school years with all that entails, my 2nd has a lot of catching up to do now that she is (finally) reading and we found the right meds to control her ADHD, and my youngest is starting kindergarten material, well, demanding it. I don't think what we have been doing will be sufficient anymore.

 

It has only been in the last few months that I have come to realize my difficulty with actually teaching my kids formally. It was always hidden by other challenges. I chafe at following routines and plans (even the ones I make); am exhausted mentally and emotionally after only a few rounds of teaching; too easily declare sick days (though we are sick frequently); tend not to utilize the learning experiences available in the wider world because my kids can be so unpredictable; can't spend enough time preparing and evaluating; and am derailed by any intense emotional work (which is daily). The fact is I am not a people person.

 

Also, I am BURNED OUT.

 

I feel strongly that they need to not be in PS, considering all of the above. I don't have money for any other private type of ed.

 

Anyone dealt with this? My main concern right now is what is best for their academic lives? How to educate when you don't want to teach? Is self-teaching, with some mentoring, good enough? Any mantras to help deal with the guilt and self-doubt?:001_smile:

 

Melissa

Minnesota

dd14

dd9

ds8

ds4

[Jean in Newcastle]

I don't know that anyone could really answer that for you. I've had my own challenges with my children's learning styles/challenges and my own chronic health issues.

 

What I've had to do is to sit down and list each child's subjects and "grade" them - not in the sense of a letter grade as such but as to whether I am meeting their needs. Then I've written down where we are succeeding and where we weren't. Then I've come here and asked for some specific advice on meeting those needs where I wasn't meeting them. I've had to do some serious revamping of some things this year to meet the needs. To me - that's the crux of the matter - am I meeting their educational needs. This year, having a tutor come in for two of ds14's subjects did a lot to supplement the hard work I do. And I've had to step up to the plate in some areas where I don't really feel comfortable because it was what my kids needed. Of course, where you would come out on an honest evaluation like that might be very different. And the resources you have and the opportunities you have are probably different as well.