Giraffe Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 PGR needed encouragement about leaving her job to come home. I need encouragement about doing the opposite. DH is about to start a doctoral program and someone has to bring home the bacon. His scholarship looks like it's falling through (we had high hopes) so it looks like I'm going back to work and DD is going from morning-only preschool to all-day. I knew this would happen, but I thought I had a couple more years. DH is opposed to hsing so I always knew she'd be going to school and I'd be afterschooling. That's why I was ok with putting her in all-day preschool here in Turkey - as a dry run as well as language/cultural immersion. But in all my mental scenarios I was working no more than part-time. Now that DH is going to school with no scholarship, it looks like I'm going back full-time. Please, tell me it will be ok, that in a couple of years I can bring her home if DH agrees, and that if he doesn't my baby will be ok. She's likely to go to private school, not public (grandpa foots that bill, thank God), but still. She's my baby. At preschool I can drop in anytime and check that she's ok. I won't have that kind of freedom in regular school. And it will be hard to leave work even while she's in preschool. Lots of hand wringing going on here, but privately, because I can't let DH see. He's already feeling guilty for my having to go back. But honestly I need to go. We have to pay the bills! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lollie010 Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 I don't have any advice, but I am so sorry. Hoping it is an easy adjustment for everyone! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Margo out of lurking Posted June 13, 2011 Share Posted June 13, 2011 Please, tell me it will be ok, that in a couple of years I can bring her home if DH agrees, and that if he doesn't my baby will be ok. She's likely to go to private school, not public (grandpa foots that bill, thank God), but still. She's my baby. At preschool I can drop in anytime and check that she's ok. I won't have that kind of freedom in regular school. And it will be hard to leave work even while she's in preschool. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: It will be okay. Your dd will be okay; you will be okay! This is a wonderful opportunity for her to be immersed in the Turkish culture. Just as homeschooling involves the whole family, your new adventure--your dh's doctorate, your dd's all day preschool, your new job, will all be part of your family's cherished memories! This is a new time for all of you, and your positive outlook can help keep your family encouraged and enthusiastic. I understand you want to ease your dh's guilt. But this is a great time to share any concerns you may have, about any inadequacies returning to work, worrying that you won't be able to leave work when she's in preschool, letting your dd go. Let your husband be there for you, support and encourage you. Go through this together. This is a temporary step that you and dh are making toward your family's future. It will not always be this way, and your long term goal can include lessening your work hours in a few years and possibly bringing your dd home for schooling when your dh goes back to work. Your baby will be okay! Where she schools is less important than the love and support she has from her parents! You'll still have that time as a family, and that's what you'll want to embrace. That's what is important. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Giraffe Posted June 13, 2011 Author Share Posted June 13, 2011 :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: It will be okay. Your dd will be okay; you will be okay! This is a wonderful opportunity for her to be immersed in the Turkish culture. Just as homeschooling involves the whole family, your new adventure--your dh's doctorate, your dd's all day preschool, your new job, will all be part of your family's cherished memories! This is a new time for all of you, and your positive outlook can help keep your family encouraged and enthusiastic. I understand you want to ease your dh's guilt. But this is a great time to share any concerns you may have, about any inadequacies returning to work, worrying that you won't be able to leave work when she's in preschool, letting your dd go. Let your husband be there for you, support and encourage you. Go through this together. This is a temporary step that you and dh are making toward your family's future. It will not always be this way, and your long term goal can include lessening your work hours in a few years and possibly bringing your dd home for schooling when your dh goes back to work. Your baby will be okay! Where she schools is less important than the love and support she has from her parents! You'll still have that time as a family, and that's what you'll want to embrace. That's what is important. :grouphug::grouphug::grouphug: Thank you - I needed that. We'll be back in the US later this summer and she'll go to school at her Montessori school in Texas. She loves her school so I think it will be a good move at least while she's in preschool. And DH getting his doctorate will be VERY good for him and the family as a whole. And it's not bad that I keep my skills "fresh" I'm just having Mommy guilt. Thanks for the hugs. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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