Hestia Posted April 3, 2008 Share Posted April 3, 2008 My two daughters aged 10 and 11 watched their little brother being born at home. However, we talked at length before hand about how mommy would be in great pain and probably look (and sound) a little crazy, but that the whole process has such a precious end and it is all over relatively quickly, and that neither daddy or I were afraid so they didn't need to be either. I also told them that it was entirely up to them if they stayed or left if they decided they didn't want to be there at any point. I also told them that nearer the time I may decide I don't want anyone there and they wouldn't be called in. They and their little brother (only 2 so no question of him being there anyway) went round to a friends house and my husband called our daughters just as I was getting close to pushing. They came in and stood in the doorway and watched as he was born, then they left to tell our friends the news (they lived right across the street) then they came back about an hour later when we were all cleaned up and I was tucked in my own bed. They truly love that they got to experience it. (and I even managed a smile at them through the last bit which was a precious moment of encouragement). I do think that it made all the difference to me to know that they would only be there at the end and wouldn't have to watch me in pain for hours. So having a good friend so close was a blessing in itself. It is worth mentioning to that my older son was born in hospital as they waited in the room next door and afterwards both said they wished they had been there. (9and 10 at the time). I haven't had time (or need) to decide if I would want/allow my son to be there. First thought is probably not, but that is more from his personality than anything. Hopefully(?) that may be helpful. All the best for whatever you decide! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LisaKinVA Posted April 3, 2008 Share Posted April 3, 2008 I couldn't do it. I know people who have, and everyone is fine. I just know myself well enough to know I *couldn't* handle it. My dh, midwife & assistant are enough for me, and really any more than that and I'd start stressing about what I looked like, sounded like, gross bodilly functions -- instead of focusing on getting through the process. My vote would be: If having ds there will stress you out, don't do it. If you honestly don't care, it probably won't matter. It really comes down to what you feel comfortable with. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Colleen Posted April 3, 2008 Share Posted April 3, 2008 Good grief, I didn't want *anyone* around me when I labored, much less my children. Definitely NOT my cuppa. Same with home births. The mere thought of giving birth in my own bed just...shudder.:tongue_smilie: If I were like you, though, and comfortable having an 11 daughter present at the birth, I wouldn't say no to 9 year old son. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MomofSeven Posted April 4, 2008 Share Posted April 4, 2008 Good grief, I didn't want *anyone* around me when I labored, much less my children. Definitely NOT my cuppa. Same with home births. The mere thought of giving birth in my own bed just...shudder.:tongue_smilie: If I were like you, though, and comfortable having an 11 daughter present at the birth, I wouldn't say no to 9 year old son. While going to the hospital to have this last baby I was reminding my dh of the drill...don't touch me, don't talk to me, don't come near me and remind all the nurses to do the same unless I need medical attention. My poor dh always stands in the corner of the room usually working on his computer while I work through the contractions. It's a pretty funny sight. But then once the baby arrives, he joins me and we're once again a big happy family. I just don't like being around anyone me while in labor. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karen sn Posted April 4, 2008 Share Posted April 4, 2008 because I would be afraid that it would scare my dd for when it comes to her turn, especially when she sees you in pain. My dh saw his cousin's birth by accident was totally freaked out by it. He only overcame that when he was forced to at Juju's birth. But had he been prepared and been with an adult assigned to HIM - it would have been different. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Karen sn Posted April 4, 2008 Share Posted April 4, 2008 I can't believe she made you clean up the mess. My midwife told me that she and her assistant would clean all of that up. She asked dh for instructions on how to run the washer and she put the load in herself. All I can say is WOW! I never saw the mess at my home birth either. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.