Update to Bright Young Woman Thread

[Tokyomarie]

This is an update on the dd I posted about in the the Bright young women w/o a 4 year degree? thread. It appears I can't update the thread title, so I'm posting a separate thread to highlight that I have an update.

 

After a lot of stress, many discussions, and a 1400 mile road trip with her, my daughter has now transfered to another university in the city where her boyfriend lives. Her sister & BIL will be moving there this week & she will be living with them. She is continuing on towards a degree in music, but it will be a non-auditioned BA with a music concentration. It looks like she'll still be able to graduate in a 4 year time frame.

 

So far, the news is positive. Some of the changes are ones she could have made at her old school: having a car & commuting vs. living on campus w/o a car. She likes being able to leave campus and go "home" for the evening (right now she is staying in temporary accommodation- not her bf's place- until she can get into the new place). She is in a bigger city with more resources but one that is still conveniently navigable by car. The scenery can't be beat. She likes her classes so far- she's beginning her 3rd week. And, she is able to see her bf every day- I do hope that is a positive for her, rather than a drain that takes away from school. I think it will be but the first semester's grades will tell. I do hope she'll also make friends of her own amongst the students & in the music community at large, so that her life there will have some balance. I am optimistic that this is a good move for her; I'm hopeful that she'll take advantage of the new opportunities she'll have in the fiddling world.

 

Thanks to all of you who commented on my original thread, and for those who took time to say a prayer. Parenting these young adults really is a challenge. We shouldn't want to take the decisions away from them that they need to make, but making sure they truly understand the details and consider the potential consequences of their proposed actions is something that conscientous parents want for their kids. We want them to make good, well-considered decisions even if those decisions are not necessarily the exact ones we would make. And sometimes that makes us unpopular with those young adults who still need the guidance of older, seasoned adults but don't yet realize it.

[Nan in Mass]

That is great! Thank you for updating us. I quit college, came home, got sent by my father to my boyfriend's college, and then married him when we graduated. It worked out very well, in retrospect, although it was all very hard at the time.

[Kareni]

Thanks for the update; I'm glad that it's positive news!

 

Best wishes to you and your daughter as you navigate these challenging times.

 

Regards,

Kareni

[Tokyomarie]

Thanks, Nan & Kareni, for your replies. I'm hoping things will settle down as we all settle into a new routine.