We need a How-to-play-with-neighborhood-kids tutorial.

[MomOfOneFunOne]

WooHoo! We have neighborhood kids for the first time! Two problems:

1) We have no idea how informal neighborhood play works. I grew up in the country so I don't have my own experience to draw from. We don't know how to initiate it, join it, or manage it in general. Is there a nice yet firm way to keep play outside and avoid altogether going in each other's houses? This isn't something I'm willing to allow but I want it to work out for them to play together outside.

 

2) They're boys. My girl's a girl. I'll assume they won't want to play dolls but other than that, are there any informal/unwritten boy-play rules we need to know?

 

They seem nice. This is just uncharted territory for us.

 

Any help/advice appreciated.

[kewb]

This is how it works on our block:

My kids spend all day outside with the kids on the block. It is simple to keep the masses outside with a simple-please keep it oustide. The only time the kids are in each others homes is when we do a movie night or there is inclement weather. Everyone goes to their own homes to snack/use facilities (unless a desperate emergency).

 

I am not aware of any informal rules. Everyone goes outside and figures out what they want to do. One house usually shakes out as "the it" house and that is whose yard they spend the most time in.

[Kathy in MD]

WooHoo! We have neighborhood kids for the first time! Two problems:

1) We have no idea how informal neighborhood play works. I grew up in the country so I don't have my own experience to draw from. We don't know how to initiate it, join it, or manage it in general. Is there a nice yet firm way to keep play outside and avoid altogether going in each other's houses? This isn't something I'm willing to allow but I want it to work out for them to play together outside.

 

2) They're boys. My girl's a girl. I'll assume they won't want to play dolls but other than that, are there any informal/unwritten boy-play rules we need to know?

 

They seem nice. This is just uncharted territory for us.

 

Any help/advice appreciated.

 

Talk to the parents. Some will respect your desire to have your dd play outside only and others won't. You may also have to compromise on the outside play only, but you can make strict rules -- call you first for permission and only 1 hour max. The family I had problems with keeping the kids outside was the one who wouldn't let their kids outside except under very controlled connditions, therefore to let their kids have friends, the parents let all the neighborhood veg out in front of their game systems.

[lgm]

We skip the knock on the door..think that was originally b/c of the desire to not wake up babies or not interrupt whatever the family was doing. The going rule is that those who are out front are eligible for playing with, but the joining in ones should go over to their sidewalk & ask permission to join in first. It's an area where playdates are arranged too, so we don't want to horn in when someone has a friend that lives twenty minutes away that can only come over once in a blue moon. Sometimes siblings just want to play with each other too, especially if they are reconnecting after a day apart or are working on a sports skill drill. However, excluding one neighbor when another is over isn't done. Any backyard play requires permission from the parents of all children, since the backyards aren't in sight.

 

The other rule is that the ages and activities need to be appropriate..i.e. don't get into a situation where chaperoning would be appropriate.

[wagnfun]

WooHoo! We have neighborhood kids for the first time! Two problems:

1) We have no idea how informal neighborhood play works. I grew up in the country so I don't have my own experience to draw from. We don't know how to initiate it, join it, or manage it in general. Is there a nice yet firm way to keep play outside and avoid altogether going in each other's houses? This isn't something I'm willing to allow but I want it to work out for them to play together outside.

 

2) They're boys. My girl's a girl. I'll assume they won't want to play dolls but other than that, are there any informal/unwritten boy-play rules we need to know?

 

They seem nice. This is just uncharted territory for us.

 

Any help/advice appreciated.

 

We have 17 kids on our street ranging from 4-16 (5 girls, 12 boys). There is ALWAYS a kid outside or a baseball game going on. These kids started by just throwing a ball back & forth w/ each other and after a few years progressed to full sleepovers & plans to meet at 9am or "after dinner" now that it is summer. We are the middle house on the street so ours is the hang out yard. I have no grass just dirt at this point and a 5 ft skate ramp in my driveway and I dont' mind. The kids are all comfortable coming over & my kids are home. Standard rule unless someone is spending the night they go home to use the restroom (or come home if its my kids at someone elses house) and I offer water whenever & occasionally make cupcakes or pick up cheap otter pops just to share. We have greeted every new neighbor with cookies & a folder of the local fastfood menus & tips (such as $1 movies up the street, little league sign up info, etc) which seems to break the ice fairly quick.

My son has a variety of animals (dog, snake, lizards, dragons) which when he takes them outside also breaks the ice w/ new neighbor kids. :tongue_smilie:

On the boy/girl thing, my 6yr dd is a tom boy & can climb the tree faster then the boys, she blends & they see her as a boy (so far!)

[Samiam]

No formal rules, just basically knocking on the door to ask to play.

 

Our neighbors are the the one with the "it" yard. Their garage is basically a "hanging out" area, as it is basically empty and they get the shade on that side in the afternoons. The garage door is open, and I can see right in from my house. The boys ranging from 6-11, usually end up there when it gets to hot out.

 

My children rarely are allowed to be inside other's houses, as that usually just means they are playing video games.....no, no go OUTSIDE and get air, PLAY!

 

Occasionally I do allow children into our house, with bad weather, as I would prefer them here then my child there (just me, not because of their family or anything), and that lets me hear the interactions and get a good idea of what things these boys are saying/doing.

 

As far as what boys do, for the younger crowd, 6-8, it's alot of Star Wars, Soldiers, some sports here and there...sometimes Hotwheels in the dirt.