[What was your favorite adult book you read in '17?]

Isn't Firefly Lane by Kristin Hannah been out for a few years? I wonder why it has been so popular this year? I also read it on the recommendation of my SIL who also read it this year.

I'd have to say my fave was The Orphan Train. It's about a girl and a girl+ baby escaping Germany during WW2 by joining the circus. One of the girls was already an acrobat and the other didn't set out to join the circus, but that's where she ended up. It had great characters and I loved the setting of the circus of long ago.

[MIL has the family get together on Christmas Day and I think it’s selfish]

If you and your dh don't want to go, don't go. Honestly, though it's a little late to change this year, decide early what works for you next year and tell her. When she says "we are having our family get together on Christmas." You say, "oh, y'know, I'm sorry, but that isn't going to work out for us this year. We would really like to celebrate Christmas at home this time. Would you like to do our family Christmas x weekend, y weekend, or do you just want to have it on Christmas without us?" She's going to be upset- it's hard to not get what you want after getting it for so long- but she will get over it. (My MIL hates lots of things that she eventually gets over.)

[How would you interpret this]

I would have thought "did not have any Walking Dead stuff and so that would be particularly desirable". And I say that as a parent of a 10 year old dd who I would not allow to have any Walking Dead stuff! The other interpretation did not occur to me until I read other posts. Although, if I knew the families, I might realize the parents wouldn't allow it. I don't think I know any parents who would allow it!

 

ETA: my 10 yo ds does have a "walking dead" nerf gun. But just because there isn't really a difference except for the picture on the packaging.

[Oh, jiminy! Gift for 7 year old dd]

When I was a kid one of the coolest presents (one I actually remember!) was a big box thirst my aunt had filled with a whole bunch of art supplies. There was just a ton of different kinds of paper, stickers, etc.

[Oh, jiminy! Gift for 7 year old dd]

We got my dd7 a sewing kit that she will really like. Or maybe a few months of Kiwi crates? They are great art fun!

ETA: we got this one, but there are lots of others in various themes.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/B000F3V2MW/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?ie=UTF8&qid=1513714638&sr=8-3&pi=AC_SX236_SY340_QL65&keywords=kids+sewing+kit&dpPl=1&dpID=510e3Hk1GtL&ref=plSrch

[Scheduling of Specials? Please don't be harsh]

Since you mentioned Karate, one of the things we use to keep our kids active inside is one of those punching bag things. They practice kicks/punches and it helps keep them active. There are also a ton of exercise/dance/Zumba videos online. A mini-tramp might help. We have a 7 foot trampoline in the basement- it probably wouldn't be a great investment for you- it's designed for younger kids, but my 10 year old boy still jumps on it. I don't schedule or exactly, but my kids have to do 45 minutes of exercise before any screen time happens. They have several things to pick from.

Also, I would plan on trying not to leave the house most of the time, so your husband can just have the car. I'd only take him to work if there was somewhere we HAD to be. Especially when you are recovering. We get so much more done when we don't leave the house.

[s/o Do/did you "play monster" with your kids?]

I certainly played tickle monster a lot. Even with my younger brother. He loved it and my kids loved it. They would beg me to do it. No one ever tried to scare anyone. If someone wasn't having fun I would've stopped. But it was always me saying "I'm done, I'm done, I can't do it anymore!!" And them begging for more.

[Need new holiday tradition ideas]

Maybe find a live nativity somewhere? Go see the Nutcracker?

[Need adult audio book recommendations?]

We usually stay in a hotel and drive over 2 days, but this year, we're trying a straight through drive 13-14 hours overnight. I need recommendations for really good adult audio books to keep dh and I awake while the kids sleep. Dh would prefer shorter books- not something that will last all the way there and back! Something exciting or suspenseful. We've run out of Harlan Coben titles. Thanks!!

[Netflix....need movie/show ideas]

Jane the Virgin is a funny show. It's pretty clean too.

[Depressed teen- let them skip activities & school?]

I have spent a good chunk of my life depressed. When I'm in an "episode" it's not good to skip things- the net result is feeling worse. BUT- if it's possible to scale down, that would be good. Maybe a half day at school? I'd push hard on getting her to dance though. Or maybe give her a day or two as a "mental health break" but be clear that she has to go back when the break is over. Sometimes not going makes it even harder to go. I've gone to many, many things that I didn't want to go to because it was harder to explain my absence than to suck it up and pretend to be fine. This is if she's moderately depressed. Serious depression is different. I dropped out of college for a semester once because I just couldn't make myself go to class. Good luck.

[Making a Small House Work for a Big Family]

Oh- the dark depressing aspect of the basement might be solved with full spectrum light bulbs. Honestly, in our cloudy winter it's more cheerful to be in our basement. I am really sensitive to light and have replaced most of our light bulbs to the full spectrum ones.

[Making a Small House Work for a Big Family]

I love our unfinished basement. We've put those rubber floor mats on part of it to make a play area. My daughter has a short lofted bed in her room that has dresser drawers and a desk under it- it's short, the desk pulls out. It fits under her sloped ceilings.

[Not using the china this year! And other issues...chime in but be polite]

I don't host, so I don't decide! I do help with cleaning up at my mom's or MILs. Sometimes we use paper and sometimes we use the regular dishes. I would use paper if it was at my house. The point is to eat with family, motto be fancy. Besides, in both families, there are a lot of kids under 10.

My brother is loud. He just is. He's a really, really nice guy- he's never yelling in a negative way- he just has a booming voice. He was put in speech therapy as a kid because he couldn't talk quietly at school. But since he's my brother, I just say "hey, use your inside voice."

 

ETA: I also have 2 very loud children. I joke with my brother that I got the kids he was supposed to have. My dh and I are not loud people AT. ALL. But I am constantly reminding my kids that we're all in the same room and I can hear them just fine, they don't need to yell.

[Church..need some advice]

I agree with you. I’m referring to certain issues I’ve seen and experienced. I don’t hold them to a higher standard, it’s just that I believe that if they all say something and try to preach things in church, I’d expect them to hold to what they preach and teach. I’m referring to adult children of the pastor. Living two different lives is not what I really want to be surrounded by and learn from.

For example: drinking is preached against by the pastor’s children, yet they do it and sometimes even brag to certain people about it. Issues such as those bother me. Nobody is perfect and I know that. I just think if specific topics are taught, the people teaching them should follow, too. Again, small town, not many churches, so I’m not saying they are all like this. Just my experience.

 

 

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I'm a preacher's kid. I don't know why you would judge a preacher based on the actions of his (or her) adult children?!? And what do you mean the preacher's kids preach against it? When are they preaching? The adult children have the right to their own life and the pastor deserves to not bear the consequences of their choices. I'm sorry, but as a PK, this is a sensitive subject. And my sibs and I don't even do things that would reflect poorly on my dad. But we didn't choose to live in there public eye this way and my dad isn't responsible for the choices I make now.

[Question for those who get flu shots]

Wow. We've never experienced anything like that. Maybe some soreness if the injection site is pushed on- but that's it. I don't know what I would do in your shoes.

[Give me your gross baby girl names!]

I have a Maureen and a Luena in my family tree.

[Gift ideas for parents]

We hired a photographer to take pics of the extended family. Not doing that again, but at least this year is taken care of!

[Creamy, Delicious Winter (or any season) Drinks]

I like to put caramel syrup in my hot chocolate!

[If that feeling came in pill form....]

I think there is something wrong with me. Laughing gas does not do that for me at all. I get it every time I have something done- I have anxiety, but it only seems to help a little. I have also wondered when prescribed Norco or whatever what the big deal is. Why do people like it? It doesn't do anything for me. Sometimes I wonder if it's even helping the pain- because the pain is still there. But I always wonder "well, what if it hurt worse if I didn't take it?" Fortunately, this has only happened very short term after an operation or something.

[Favorite Library Bag]

I've been using a collapsible picnic basket. It's easy to carry and flip through the books while they are still in the basket. I just grabbed it one day when I needed something quick, but it turned out so good, I've been using it ever since.

[Extended Family and Kid Birthday Parties]

We either do friend or family. Not both at the same time. As an introvert, that would kill me- trying to introduce everyone and such. My MIL did make some passive aggressive comments about not being invited to my dd's gymnastics party. I thought that was weird. At every family gathering with my ILs, someone turns on sports and my dh, his brothers and his dad mostly just sit and watch. I find this seriously annoying, but I just entertain myself with the kids or talking to my SIL.

[S/o physical attraction]

When I look at pics of dh and I from our wedding or that long ago, I'm struck by how young we look. I find him more attractive now- he looks like a man instead of a boy! (We married at 24, so he was a man then - and I would have been annoyed by someone saying we looked like kids then. But from my perspective now, we did.) I'm sure I will always find him attractive.

[Do you know your homeschooling philosophy?]

I had lots of lofty, unrealistic (at least for the kids I have) ideas. I wanted learning to be fun, to be an adventure, to be individualized to their interests/strengths. Seems easy enough, but I haven't been able to make it a reality. (This is an extremely simplified version, but I don't want to get into the details)

[In which I am reminded why I quit homeschooling]

While I have found diversity among homeschoolers individually and on this board, I have not found diversity among homeschooling clubs/groups/co-ops. These have all had tightly controlled statements of faith, been non inclusive with laundry lists of people and individual choices for intelligibility - such as using secular science curriculum - to weed out the people who don't believe everything the organizer believes, and heavily discriminatory against non evangelicals. So I get the angst that the OP is feeling.

This has not been my experience. Even though most homeschoolers I know are Christians, they are not the type being discussed here. I've been a part of 2 Christian co-ops and basically they just open with a prayer. Nothing else is explicitly Christian in content. And anyone is welcome as long as they don't object to the prayer.