[How to encourage a child not to quit]

If you have a look at the book "The Whole-Brain Child" by Dan Siegel there's a chapter and even a cartoon of this exact situation, except it's where a boy doesn't want to continue woodwork due to cutting his hand. They advise getting the child to narrate exactly what happened, eg "I was doing gymnastics, I was doing blah-blah move, then I fell, and hurt my back, it really hurt, then mum helped me, and then it stopped hurting". 

 

It's a good book if you can get it. The idea is not dismissing what was a very scary incident, but also using it as a way forward - bad thing happened, you got through it, you will get through other things too. 

["My French teacher was actually named Mrs. French," and other people we knew with names like that.]

I taught a little girl called "Paige Turner" - don't know if she ended up helping musicians though.

[<vent> We are just plain lonely...]

I found it very lonely to start with even though i knew people, because I didn't know 'my people'. I had to start my own group and that has been really successful in finding people who have a similar philosophy to myself - I've made 2 very good friends and we catch up regularly. 

 

Here's a really useful guide http://project-based-homeschooling.com/camp-creek-blog/introverts-guide-to-building-community

[Curious: when was the last time YOU had a vaccine / booster shot ...]

when we started ttc, we were advised both to get Hep B, so we did that. We were both given the DPT (that is diptheria/pertussis (whooping cough)/tetanus) for free when I fell pregnant (it was free at the time for parents and grandparents of newborns, not sure if that has changed). I then got the chicken pox booster after blood tests showed I might not be immune (even though I'd had it before) I think I had to pay for that, can't remember. I get the flu shot free every year as I'm an asthmatic. Before that, my last shots had been before travelling to do aid work, so early 20s. This is Australia - none of the shots too expensive.

[Authors you used to like - but lost their touch]

I loved Robin McKinley's Sunshine and Pegasus, but Chalice was paper-thin and Shadows felt like Sunshine-remake. She has had a very hard and sad couple of years so I don't know if we will be getting any more from her. 

 

Diana Wynne Jones' later stuff was still interesting but not as good, same with Margaret Mahy. I agree that it would be related to pressure to write, especially in old age. 

 

Conversely, I find Tamora Pierce's early stuff unreadable, but I like her later books, the Trickster series and the Beka series. 

 

I also agree that some of the HP books could have done with some editing. Not 'lost the plot' level, but definitely some editing. 

[Request for a poem]

Do you mean like Robert Burns poetry - Scotch? 

 

O my Luve's like a red, red rose, 
That's newly sprung in June: 
O my Luve's like the melodie, 
That's sweetly play'd in tune. 

As fair art thou, my bonie lass, 
So deep in luve am I; 
And I will luve thee still, my dear, 
Till a' the seas gang dry. 

Till a' the seas gang dry, my dear, 
And the rocks melt wi' the sun; 
And I will luve thee still, my dear, 
While the sands o' life shall run. 

And fare-thee-weel, my only Luve! 
And fare-thee-weel, a while! 
And I will come again, my Luve, 
Tho' 'twere ten thousand mile!

 

[Magnatiles vs Picasso tiles]

We have both Magna Tiles and Tegu blocks - the kids play with the Magna Tiles and very rarely with the Tegu blocks. 

 

I've also just bought Brackitz - they're lots of fun too. 

[Duolingo for a reading 5 year old?]

My five year old does use Duolingo, but she already had a bit of German to start with and could read well. Some of it isn't kid friendly though, like a whole lesson asking for beer and wine etc! I don't think it's ideal for little ones, but it has been fairly good for increasing vocabulary. 

[the proverbial closet]

Is this about not finding your people, though? Do you have some friends who are the same as you? I am in an area where I have 2 good friends who are basically the same as me (we will still argue happily about various things without any acrimony), and then there are the next level of pleasant acquaintances who I'd chat about various things with but NOT politics or other certain topics, knowing it wouldn't end well. I did find it lonely here until I found my people - is that what you need? 

[Looking for an interesting historical biography about a botanist.]

Australia - Jean Galbraith, Writer in a Valley. 

 

Has she read "girls who look under rocks"? 

 

eta - another interesting Australian botanists was Louisa Atkinson, the first person to publish an Australian novel. I haven't found any books written about her, but you could research online. 

[Is this normal for a 5 yr old?]

Read simplicity parenting, if you want to cull toys. It's helpful.

 

Re the makeup and drawing on self - that is normal. My kids are constantly decorating their faces with markers, my daughter will often go through phases of setting up a "make up table" with whatever she can find. I know there are other kids doing it because I've read blogs with similar stories. I don't forbid it, but I just make sure it's all non-toxic. If she's going to put stuff on her face, I want it to be easily washed off. 

 

In terms of the hair cutting, I haven't had that. Now it's short, will she let it be? 

[Similarities between Indigenous education and Classical Education]

I have been thinking about this recently; many people have taken and used ideas from the way children were education in classical times, and found it useful. I think there's a lot from the way indigenous people educated their children which could also be helpful - and in some cases was quite similar.

 

 

 

One thing was memorisation - learning by heart reams of stories, often set to song. The stories were often historical or had a deep truth hidden inside. So, apparently there was research recently linking the oral stories of various groups of indigenous Australians to a historical event 13,000 years ago, which is amazing, long before any written records.

 

 

 

The other similarity I was thinking about was the knowledge of astronomy, really being familiar with the stars in practical ways as well as having stories about constellations. Interestingly enough, the Greek Pleiades story of the sisters is very similar to one of the indigenous Australian stories of the very same constellation.

[Studying one patch of earth]

Thanks, googling plot study got me to some interesting resources, including the term bioblitz (which sounds like fun!)

[Using literature to teach empathy and increase emotional intelligence?]

I don't know if this will help at all - it is not related to HP at all. But reading A Little Princess (by Frances Hodgson Burnett) was very powerful for me at that age - not only do you see things from Sara's perspective, but she is amazing at perspective-taking herself.. It does have magic in it, of a sort, I guess. . . 

[Studying one patch of earth]

Wow, thanks for that! I was mostly needing the 'what do I call it' bit so I could google for ideas, not for anythng formal. Thank you!

[Studying one patch of earth]

What would you call this - when you select say a metre square patch of earth and look at everything living in it? I'm trying to google but google isn't understanding me. Are there any books etc on this particular idea?

[Need some new ideas for keeping the toddler busy!]

I wrote a cheap ebook with weekly ideas for your baby/toddler, if that's any help goo.gl/PD433z

 

 

I used a baby gate to keep toddler in a room for one kind of play, then move to a different space for a different kind of play . . . different spaces used to keep em occupied for a while . . .

[Aversions to reading and issues with books/reading]

Interesting. My 5.5yr old has been reading for years but says she hates reading and never sits down cosily with a book - weird to me as reading is my favourite activity. I am assuming it will kick in sometime in the future . . .

[Is this behaviour familiar to you?]

Thanks for all the replies! It looks like for some people, this behaviour is familiar, to others it isn't. (I couldn't reply earlier, this site only seems to work one out of five times for me). 

 

 

 

I do avoid some outings - for example, we haven't done library storytime this year at all, because the 3yr old wouldn't sit and the automatic doors opened straight onto a road. But for the most part I take them out most days, especially outdoors to parks, gardens, walks. I have no problem leaving a situation with them (and regularly do!), but I always give them a chance to self-regulate first, otherwise, how will they learn? I just wish they didn't need SO many lessons! 

 

 

 

As to whether they're typically developing - they are advanced learners. Apparently intensities can go along with that. The irony is that pre-kids I was a special educator dealing with kids significantly affected by autism and intellectual disability. My two are easier to deal with, but the difference is that I can't end the work day and go put my feet up. 

[Is this behaviour familiar to you?]

After reading the 'obedience' threads, I'm starting to freak that my children are terribly behaved.

 

 

Today, I took my 3 and 5yr old to a park which has 2 playgrounds, one at either end. Each one wanted to start at a different place - they were too far apart for me to keep watch on both kids so I said they had to start at A and then go to B. Cue both kids throwing themselves on the ground and crying. I said I was leaving right then unless they negotiated. After a few more throwing on the ground and crying, they decided to start at A and end at B.

 

 

So, would your kids have just agreed with me in the first place? Or whined quietly? They were fine for the rest of the day, of course it was just me who was wondering why on earth I'd had kids in the first place.

[Jazz this dish up.]

I add a bit of olive oil, fry the onions, add some butter beans or similar, add the sausage, add some crushed tomatoes and some paprika, then I would sprinkle fresh capsicum (peppers) over the top to serve. I usually pre-cook the sausage under the grill first as it cooks it through better.

[have you ever heard of this with daycare?]

I have worked in a number of early childhood places. In one, it was utterly unacceptable to be critical of parents, we were there to support them and we were there understanding that little kids are tough work. That was a far better place to work than a different place, where the gossiping about parents and criticism of them went on - it was as though those kids belonged to us and the parents weren't good enough for them! I think that a professional team will not entertain much time criticising and second-guessing families - it is not useful or helpful and doesn't do much for morale. 

 

In regards to the 'firsts', yes, we would never say 'she walked today'! We would always wait until the parent brought it up, as someone said, it costs us nothing, and could be very painful for the parents. And in regards to the 'bad day' thing, well, now I understand that better than ever. What's the point of them telling me that she did such and such when I wasn't there to do anything about it, and can't do anything about it now? I don't mind 'she had a few meltdowns today' or whatever, but I don't want to have to answer 'now WHY did she have a tantrum in group time?' I wasn't there - how should I know?

[Article: Is the most common therapy for autism cruel?]

It is complicated. I studied ABA but ended up practising RDI (relationship development intervention) and definitely found better outcomes with RDI. It isn't just that ABA may be coercive, it is also that it may not be effective, especially when it comes to things like flexible problem solving and social language. 

 

 

[Meaning of life and existential depression (cross posted)]

I agree with a number of the above posts - questioning and thinking about these big issues is a good thing, and questions should be honoured and not necessarily answered. Humans have been wondering about such things for millenia, so expecting to have a quick easy answer is a bit ridiculous!

Sophie's World is a good one, I wonder though if eleven is too young - there's another one by the same author for younger readers, "hello, is anyone here" or something like that - it is all about honouring questions. The author is Jostein Gaarder. He has other great books such as The Orange Girl and The Solitaire mystery which all touch on the meaning of life and how big space is and so on, but unless your 11 yr old is advanced you might want to save them till the teens. The Orange Girl in particular deals with death, it's very good. 

I think it's interesting exploring how different peoples in different times have found meaning - eg the Vikings and Anglo-Saxons felt that your reputation and the memory of your deeds was your shot at immortality, others feel that Art is Long, Life is Short, and then there's the cycle of life, going back to be one with the land. 

I don't know your kids or their personalities - I think how people deal with this is so individual. I have certainly had periods of deep existential angst but I tend to be a curious optimist who is always waiting for something interesting and new to happen, so I find it hard to go with 'we're all doomed!' the way I know others do. My kids have dealt with the idea of death and going back to be part of the universe of molecules without any concerns, whether this continues I guess we will see. 

 

 

[What has interested you this year?]

This year I've got quite interested in indigenous astronomy (it's amazing how many of the stories cross cultures), and also labyrinths (which are found carved in rocks or made from standing stones all around the world). I made a labyrinth in our back garden which I walk as a meditation sometimes. I find it comforting that human beings really do have so much in common despite the media focus on divisions.

 

What have you got interested in over this year?