Thanks for the warm welcome OhElizabeth and 4evercanucks. I've been benefiting from this forum for a while now. About time I should head over to Introduce myself, I guess!

Yes, we tried meds and I do (sort of) regret it. Long time lurker here. Finally registered to add my $.02 worth. We tried meds for our ds. He was clearly "adhd" (as in signs/symptoms long before preschool/Kinder experiences). Reason we finally tried them was due to serious behavioral issues - meltdowns, hitting, out of control hyperactivity. Tried stims first - Adderall then Concerta. Instant release, then extended release. Too many, too bad side effects: absolutely no appetite (would not eat!) while on them. Tics. One night ds talked for 4 hours straight, non-stop, and constantly moved his fingers in a repetitive motion. We kept trying (meds/dosages), b/c clearly they helped with impulse/hyperactivity/focus. But the kicker for me was ds' mood - irritable, crying, focused - yes, but angry and just not happy. No joy. The major plus to "adhd"! DS has joy, energy and enthusiasm in abundance. Next tried non-stimulant. Seemed to "work" - not as good for focus/attention, but helped with hyper/impulsive. DS muddled along, but still lots of meltdowns/frustration/hitting. Anxious, not making friends, not able to interact well with kids. Made him sleepy. Had to keep increasing the dose to keep same effect, until we were at the top of recommended for his weight. We pulled DS from school about the time we settled on the non-stimulant (Intuniv). Kept him on the med while sorting out our first HS year. Took him off early this summer - just to "see" - DH and I vowed to do a no-med trial 1 - 2 times / yr to make sure the benefits were worth it. After 2 weeks of crazy making hyperactivity DS was markedly better. Better mood. Fewer meltdowns - from 1 a day (or more) to 1 a week, maybe. Hasn't hit anyone since we dialed him down from the med. Hyper - yes. Focus/attention problems - big time. Better mood, happier, learning "strategies" to calm himself, adjust his behavior when kids/people react negatively to his behavior. I regret that year on the med, b/c I think the real remedy was removing him from school (an environment that was not good for him and likely caused, in a sense, most of his behavior problems). We wasted a year on a med that did harm his mood, but we didn't know it until we took him off after significant time recovering from the trauma that was school for him. The moral to my story. Don't let anyone/anything shame you for trying meds to help your kid. But, don't let anyone push you into it. ADHD meds are not the same as eyeglasses or Insulin (two popular analogies that are a load of you-know-what, imo). Consider taking a dose or two yourself. See how you feel - it's not the same, of course, everyone reacts differently, but at least it will give you an idea. I might even try meds for DS again in the future - when he's older, can tell me how he feels/what the effects are/help make the decision. Maybe. Also, check out a wide range of lit on ADHD - it's a probably a poor label for a group of symptoms common to kids with many different "triggers"/"causes". The book "ADHD does not exist" is well worth a read. I think the best thing for an "ADHD" kid is loved ones willing and able to "modify the environment" to play to his/her strengths and minimize the situations they will not be able to be successful at for as long as possible - until their "executive function" and other social/developmental/behavioral skills/brain catches up to their (superior!) motor function and peers. But again, I am not anti-med, and there is no shame in trying to do the best by your dc! Nor in also prioritizing keeping yourself/your family sane and together.