[When should a woman stop coloring her gray hair?]

I voted "other" because I don't think there should be a rule at all. My grandmother is in her mid-nineties. She was born a gorgeous redhead and has been one ever since. She is not trying to hide her age, she is quite proud of it, but she simply cannot imagine not having red hair. She is absolutely beautiful!

[Send part of the family on international extended family trip?]

[(relationship history with in laws/amount they babysat)x(extant of any financial dependency)+(hopes for future relationship with in laws/realistic expectations)]- (discord this will cause between siblings X 2)= ??????

 

I chose other, because I'm not sure that there is a "right" answer. The best answer is the one that feels right to your family, the one that won't keep you awake wondering.

 

I do think it was at best, unwise, for the in laws to make plans of this nature without direct consultation with all potential travelers.

[Christians - the book Boundaries?]

It's a wonderful book. I've taught from it and people really find it helpful.

[How much would this bother you?]

The initial knowledge would creep me out, and if I believed he was a danger to my children or to me, I'd want to move.

[Announcements - proper etiquette]

I chose ask your sister. l think it's lovely that you are so considerate of her feelings. I'm emojiless on the iPad, so imagine hugs, balloons, etc.

 

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!!!

 

One for each baby. Same age cousins are so fun!

[Which is "normal" thinking?]

I'm generally pleasant and funny, plus I often have good snacks. People like to tell me their stories. I chose most.

.

[A plea to food bloggers (photo-related)]

For those who monetize their sites, it's all about the money. The more time you spend on the page, the better the "time average user spends on the page" stats are. That also speaks to the idea that you weren't there by mistake (clicking quickly out of the page), which helps make your site more attractive to advertisers. The more words on the page, the better the search ranking (potentially). If your page says "paprika chicken" a bazillion times, that helps make it one of the top suggestions for people searching "paprika chicken", giving you more viewers (thus, again, looking better to advertisers). The more pictures on the page, the more likely someone will pin one to a pintrest board, or find the page through a Google image search. And so on...

I had no idea!

 

I so agree about the recipe. Just give it to me. I don't have time to scroll!

[Hey Joanne, how do you pronounce your name?]

And, oddly, my mom gave me the middle name "Joan" and it is pronounced...Jo-anne. Why, you may join me in asking? Because that is her middle name and spelling, and my grandparents were taught that was the pronunciation of Joan of Arc when they were in school in the 1920s. Go figure.

I know a JoAn (yes, there is a capital A in the middle of the name). The pronunciation is identical to yours.

 

As for our Joanne, if she is other than Jo-Anne it's going to be a struggle for me. I was in second grade when I learned the proper pronunciation of Penelope. I don't think I stopped saying Pen-eh-lope in my head until junior high!

[Will I miss this?]

When we were deciding about whether or not to have a caboose sleep deprivation was my number one con! I'm with everyone else, the snugly joy of nursing is a memory I will always cherish, but the exhaustion? NO!

[Favorite reusable grocery bags/totes, especially if you do bulk shopping?]

I have had these for years:

 

http://www.reuseit.com/totes-and-market-baskets/acme-bags-reuseit-reuseit-earthtote-reusable-bag-original.htm

 

The one downside is that baggers recognize their strength. Baggers will pack them to a weight that is uncomfortable to carry if I don't specifically ask them to keep the bags reasonably light. I should make laminated instruction tags and attach them. #iamnotacontrolfreak

[(Sorry - Never mind.)]

You could kill someone with PB cupcakes. How insensitive!

 

Kelly

There's an essential oil for that!

[Could you pray, pls? Dil and son having first baby...C section Update]

Just prayed.

[Prayers/good thoughts requested]

Just prayed.

[(Sorry - Never mind.)]

Do you dine on quince and slices of mince?

Not anymore. Pussycat was a no show to Owl's wedding & P sent O a bill for the uneaten quince and mince. So. Much. Drama. Now quince and mince make me SAD.

[(Sorry - Never mind.)]

Sporks are just so pedestrian. Public schools use them. I won't have them in my house. We use runcible spoons or ice cream forks.

[(Sorry - Never mind.)]

Love is the answer and you know that for sure.

[Another random "Help me raise my kid" poll]

She is really little and doing well in the current daycare. I would not move her to shave three months off your repayment.

[Youth Group woes. Would you say something?]

Several people have mentioned this so I'll give specifics on what happens. These are not isolated incidents. My oldest has been attempting to connect for 2 and a half years.

 

DD approaches two or three girls who are chatting. After waiting for an opening in the conversation, she says:

 

DD : "Hi, Anne. How are you?"

 

Anne: "Oh. Fine. " smiles and looks away.

 

DD: "How has your week been?"

 

Anne: "umm...Good. "

 

Long awkward pause.

 

Anne turns from dd and brings up a topic related to school or a ball game that my dd has no experience with. After a minute or two, of standing there feeling foolish and unwanted, my dd melts away into the background. Sometimes she'll approach two or three groups of kids with the same sort of response. And those are the days when someone will actually make eye contact and actually seem like they see her.

 

These are not total strangers to my dd. She grew up with these kids. They've been to my home. They've gone on trips together. I know their parents and their siblings. They've spent the night here. It's not like there is NO common ground.

 

It's hard to be a friend when people are already satisfied with their own friends and totally uninterested in opening the circle up for an outsider . My dd is not "over sensitive" or looking out for ways to feel hurt. These are not incidences that only happen occasionally.

 

As far as what my dd wants to gain...having someone to sit with at church would actually be nice. Bonus points if someone cares whether or not you are there.

 

We're trying something else. We're inviting a couple of our homeschooled friends to attend. We'll see how it goes.

That's worse than I had imagined. I think inviting some homeschooled friends is a great idea.

[S/O Fundraisers: what's the strangest thing you've seen?]

I want a fundraiser where they come weed my garden or mulch my landscaping.

My neighbor is a minister (not at our church). She asked if her middle school youth group could come and do our weeding/fall cleanup. I said yes. $200 later I had more weeds than I would expect and no roses. They dug up and hauled away my roses.

[Youth Group woes. Would you say something?]

Typing on my phone so this won't be literary:

-tell YP (because he's a good one, may have ideas, can support

-there's a certain extent to which connecting with people is a numbers game. Keep inviting, and don't take it personally when you don't click.

-meet the school high schoolers where they are. What does their life revolve around? Show interest in them. The "good" ones will eventually return it.

-accept that a huge part of high school relationships revolve around the minutiae of daily interactions and events at school. That's likely impenetrable. Don't try to have them explain each little imbroglio (they won't want to do this all the time. Be content to go along for the ride.

-especially for girls, deep connection with school friends may be a trade off for homeschooling (always exceptions) but that doesn't mean there can't be more connection/inclusion

Hugs for your mama heart

[Does bleeding always mean miscarriage...]

(((((Abba12))))) I'm so sorrry for your loss.

[trying not to be frustrated...doggy adoptions - a long vent.]

I've seen some whackadoo rescues, including one with a contract allowing them to take the dog back at any time. Not requiring that you surrender the dog to them if necessary, but actually retaining primary ownership of the dog!

 

My state has an amazing program that rescues and trains dogs for service as well as pet homes. Prisoners do the training, under the supervision of a pro. The pet dogs (mostly adults) come out of the program with at minimum basic obedience, and a well known temperament. The adoption process here is sensible and the cost very reasonable. I know other states have similar programs, so it might be worth looking.

 

My most wonderful dog was adopted as a three year old retiree from her breeder. She is gone now and I miss her terribly. I'm sorry you are facing so much resistance when you just want to provide a loving home to a dog!

[sad. Putting ds5 in school.]

((((((((Medic Mom))))))))

 

I am so sorry. You couldn't have known, you love your boy, don't be harsh with yourself.

[Urgent Prayer Request for DS]

I am so sorry for the loss of your remarkable son. Thank you for continuing to share his story, your story, and His story. I prayed for you just now, and will continue to lift you up.

[My dad had surgery today (pancreatic cancer)]

PTL for the surgeon. I just prayed for healing and peace for your dad.