It's great that he asked about them, though. That's the best way to build vocabulary -- to notice words you don't know and then find out what they mean. My ds asked me what "dogmatic" means today. And now he knows. :)

So, OP, why do you ask?

Same here. Interesting, as I certainly knew at least one sense of the word when I was his age. There were always those caricature artists at fairs that were quite popular. Come to think of it, I don't really see them around anymore.

Now that's a twist! ;)

I do remember those 45 adapters, but when I saw the picture, I thought it was one of these things -- (Edited to delete image) We have a bag of those upstairs I would be thrilled to get rid of.

That's how you know it's a good idea! :) Thank you, everyone, for the replies. I do appreciate your input.

Yes, he is a slow worker. :) I've listed his chores upthread and I don't think they are excessive by almost anyone's standard. I have thought about doing the gym in the morning too. The drawback would be that there aren't any other kids at the gym at that time, so we would lose some of the social benefit. But yes, it would be more efficient. It's something to consider if our new plan (dropping the morning exercise entirely) doesn't work.

I appreciate your input, quark. Not crazy at all. Although the community benefits of the gym are not nothing, either. There are a lot of kids and teens there, and it's just down the street from the library. We're trying it for this winter. In the summer we get plenty of non-gym exercise. We've tried that a bit. We're listening to a TC course right now and sometimes listen during lunch. I don't think I'd want to count on doing it, though. Sometimes we really need a lunch break.

This is exactly what we're going to try. :) Yes, I think that 20-30 minutes was just wasted. Mostly because I really wanted him to have *success* after a really discouraging period this past fall, so I built in some extra time to make sure. But he is ready now to see that it can and should be brought back down. The exercise in the morning was to help him concentrate better during school. It helped a little, but his concentration improved tremendously after we started going to the gym. So I am wondering if it's exercise in general that helps focus and it does not necessarily have to be right before working. I sure hope so, because I think we can all be happy with that new plan.

Very true. Although I do like, if possible, to concentrate the free time into a long block rather than in little bits. Otherwise it really does feel like no time. That's how I try to structure my own time. And he does know this. As he says, it *feels* like no free time, even though he knows there is some.

Oh gosh, not just realizing it now. The bolded is like my mantra. I spent years trying to push and pull and prod him to go faster, and I'm not sure if he can't or he won't, but he never really has. This new schedule is the first one he has really consistently been able to meet without my direction. I really wanted him to experience success at that, and now he wants and I want to help him pare it back toward efficiency while still having success. Does that make sense? We have done the living with natural consequences thing with the result of absolute discouragement and failure. We have done this. I don't think he could do that! He is absolutely useless without enough sleep.

Well, I was including the entire process from when we stop school until we are back in the kitchen. We can't stop school and instantly be walking out the door, for example. It might go roughly like this: 1:45 stop school and gather gym bags, bundle up, etc. 1:50 walk to gym (it's less than a mile from our house) 2:05 arrive at gym, check in, go to locker rooms, change into exercise clothes, walk up to cardio room 2:15-2:45 30 minutes on treadmill 2:45-2:55 locker room, change into swimsuit, shower 2:55-3:35 swim 40 minutes 3:35-3:50 shower, dress, repack gym bag (yup, about 15 minutes for me too) 3:50-4:10 walk home 4:10-4:15 hang up wet things That's more or less what I do. He does different things but finishes about the same time as I do. We could probably make it somewhat more efficient.

Yes, it is more than just exercise. And yes, some of it needs to be done anyway. We actually walk rather than drive, and it is a fun part of our day. I love the gym actually. And he does too. This is the first time he's been enthusiastic about exercise. And since it's so close to home, he has the ability to finish up quicker and go home without me. He hasn't chosen to do that so far. So it's really good in many ways, but it's also that big huge block of time.

Thanks, Julie. I know it takes time to go over someone else's stuff, and I appreciate your taking the time to do it. This he's already doing, totally reliably. The news we watch is only 10 minutes long. It takes a minute or two to load, but we're generally done watching it by 7:45. He has decided to try going without the morning exercise. I know exercise helps his concentration, but I'm not sure if it has to be exercise right before school or just exercise in general. That's quite true. We both enjoy exercising at the gym vs. at home but there is a lot of overhead. There are additional benefits besides the exercise, though -- community, some social time, putting us in town to be able to visit the library, etc.

We've read it many times. ;)

Just to clarify a couple of things. We watch the news right after breakfast, before doing chores. It's just a 10 minute show so, while we could cut it/ move it/ etc. as many have suggested, it's still only ten minutes of time. I actually do make breakfast and lunch. I get it on the table by 7. He usually is downstairs by 7:10 and eats until about 7:30. He really does take 30 minutes to eat lunch. I know he eats slower than some. If he reads while eating, it's even slower. That's wonderful you can do that, really. I posted in part because I know many kids do MUCH more than he does. I would like to figure out their secret.

Yes, the meal times for sure are accurate. We eat at about the same time every day. I don't know. Maybe we are just slow? The 30 minutes for breakfast includes getting up, getting dressed, and dragging himself to the kitchen. He isn't even really talking until 7:15. I can't see him taking less time there. As for dinner, the hour includes clean up time. It's about 40 minutes for dinner and then the rest for cleaning up. We rotate washing, drying, and sweeping. If it's his week to sweep, he would finish earlier. It's just basic stuff for the most part. Not even all chores, just required stuff that isn't school, music, or exercise. He makes his bed, brushes teeth and hair and tidies his room. Maybe 10 minutes for that stuff. Then unloading the dishwasher, feeding the cat, taking out the trash, and getting his gym bag ready. Maybe 20 minutes for that. Right after breakfast is when we watch the news show (10 minutes). So, 40 minutes altogether if he works efficiently.

It's four times a week. Once a week he does art/music lessons instead, and he doesn't go on the weekend. I was thinking one No-gym day would be nice. A nice long afternoon at home. Maybe. Although he's very distractable so I think things wouldn't get done. The chores probably sound more onerous than they really are -- make bed, brush teeth and hair, tidy room, unload dishwasher, take out trash, feed the cat, plus the 15 minutes for news. He's just poky about doing it. An hour for that much? He's decided he's going to speed up his chores to gain time. (GOSH, do you think I've ever suggested that tactic before? :lol:)

Oh, yes. Sleep! I was wondering about that. He has always seemed to need a lot of sleep, and when I see others' schedules it seems they must be getting less sleep than he does. But need it he does. He could honestly use a little more than 10. But how? Weekend is a good point and probably where some of the extra will have to go in the next few years.

Ds said that he wants to try starting school at 9, gaining back an hour of school. He plans to do it by (1) getting up on time, (2) doing his chores efficiently and (3) cutting out the morning exercise. 7:00-7:30 get up, get dressed, breakfast 7:30-8:15 chores and news 8:15-9:00 music and five minutes of exercise 9:00 start school To be honest, this is not much different from what we've done at times in the past. But because he decided to try it for his own benefit, I am hopeful that he will be successful. I do NOT like dragging and prodding someone through their chores. I have not been doing that these past months, and I don't plan to go back to it again. If he wants his hour back, he's going to have to get himself going! So, thank you, ladies, for throwing a little wisdom our way! I hope it works.

Yes, I would like that too! Of course these two are connected. LOL You are both correct, of course. We could move things around to different times, and the way we are doing it right now is not typical. In fact up until this year we have always started at 8 or 8:30. But he is slow to wake up and was not alert at that time (and getting worse the past couple of years). In September and October, he was "starting" school at 8:30 but by 10:00 would have very little done. We decided to try doing chores and music and some exercise first. The music requires less concentration (or at least a different kind) and the exercise helps wake him up. So that's why we switched it around. If anyone has other advice for getting "alert" in the morning I would love to hear it.

Thank you all for your replies. My ds and I have been reading them over. I appreciate the opportunity for him to hear other parents' input! Yes, I agree free time is important. That is why his school load is light compared to many here. We are currently doing 4.25 hours, which is a lot less than so many people I've read about here. But, as others have pointed out, we start very late in the day, which means we only get in 3.25 before we go off to the gym. And that's just not enough.

This isn't about school work per se, but more about the day as a whole. He doesn't feel he has enough free time, and I guess I agree. We have a pretty set routine, so it's easy enough to see where the time goes. His school load is not heavy compared to many, so it seems like he should have more free time than he does. Where is it the time going? His awake time is from 7am-9pm = 14 hours. This is his non-free time -- 2 hours = meals (30 minutes each for breakfast and lunch, 1 hour for dinner and clean up) 5 hours = school and music practice 3 hours = exercise/gym, including transportation time 1 hour = chores 11 hours total That should leave 3 hours of free time. But it doesn't exactly. Transition times eat up some of it. In schedule form: 7:00-7:30 Get up, get dressed, eat breakfast 7:30-8:30 Chores, including watching CNN Student News 8:30-10:00 Music practice (40 minutes) and exercise (at least 20-30) 10:00-1:45 School with 30 minute lunch break 1:45-4:15 (roughly) Go to the gym for exercise, includes transportation time 4:15-7:00 Free time, but he needs to do one hour of school work during this time 7:00-8:00 Dinner and clean up 8:00-9:00 Family time, games, reading, etc. (Once a week he has a music lesson and art class in the afternoon instead of going to the gym.) What happens is that we get home from the gym, and he wants to eat a snack, read for a little bit. Maybe around 5 or 5:15 he starts his last hour of school work. Then when he finishes he has less than an hour of "free time" before dinner. At least that's how it feels to him. On the one hand, I don't think most kids his age have a ton of free time. He doesn't do a sport, but the time at the gym is about what other kids spend at swim practice or whatever. On the other hand, I have deliberately kept his school load lighter just so that he would have lots of free time, and yet it doesn't seem to be there. As we increase his workload in the next few years, the free time is going to disappear entirely! How can we be doing just 4.25 hours of school and STILL not have a lot of free time. I know the "gym time" is probably what seems the obvious problem. We did join a gym last November, and I know that block of time is where he used to have a lot more free time. But he wasn't getting nearly enough exercise either. He is not interested in joining a sport, and that would take just as much time anyway. The gym has been great for both of us, but it does take a huge chunk of time out of the day. 15 minutes there and back, plus time in the locker room and showers, makes an hour of exercise take 2.5 hours out of the day. I suggested to him that I could post here to see what other people say. Advice? Feedback?

Yes, they fit over glasses (more or less). Ski goggles are better because they keep your face much warmer, but if it's first time skiing he probably won't be going very fast. I have skiied without goggles and it's okay. My ds started off without goggles and still enjoyed skiing. He didn't even have sunglasses. I hope it's warmer where you are. My ds was supposed to go skiing tomorrow but it was cancelled due to very cold weather.

We did it last year when my ds was in 6th grade. This year we've switched to Latin for the New Millennium.