Denise in Florida
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Posts posted by Denise in Florida
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Are you using the Midwestern definition of "salad" (i.e., copious amounts of Jell-O and Cool Whip)? Or a larger definition?
Erica in OR
According to my family reunions, I always thought "salad" meant mayo. you know, potato salad w/mayo, carrot raisin salad w/mayo, pasta salad...... :lol:
the lettuce stuff was 'tossed salad', ha
But thinking of jello and cool whip, remember that salad that was orange jello blended with grated carrots and cottage cheese?
ETA: not recommending the orange jello stuff, just reminiscing
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That's what I was thinking, too. :( You've got to get her to a calmer, more cooperative level so you can re-implement the practices that you *know* make a difference. Maybe meds are the way to do that, maybe the transition can be made while she's in the hospital...be willing to think outside the box...
I am so sorry this is happening. I have one son who raged as a child and was not OK due to a gluten intolerance but is perfectly fine after a decade of a healthy gut on a GF diet. I've often wondered what his life would have been like if his diet, which was a simple and easy cure at the time, had been interrupted or sabotaged.
We are all here praying for you and wishing you every success in helping your child and family.
My gluten intolerant child had most neurological symptoms. Insomnia, fatigue, brain fog, depression and anxiety.
I actually had a fairly easy time instituting gf rules for her because we had a mother and child with celiac in our homeschooling group. I did not have to explain gf or how important it was because the tough work of explaining it had already been done.
Accidental exposure because someone doesn't know what to do is bad enough but deliberate sabotage. yikes
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When my girls were younger one had a life threatening condition and we had her wear an alert bracelet. Standard bracelet did not look like fancy jewelry.
It was useful for more than just paramedics. She was asked about it several times by tour directors (at an industrial plant) and ride operators (at Disney) who were double checking that she would be safe.
Her condition also included occasionally included her outward appearance (pale and bruised). The bracelet gave several people, who I think were concerned about abuse, a opening to talk to me about her.
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If you ever decide to actually become a nudity researcher, I'll bet you could get yourself a smarmy reality show on TLC.
It could be a whole new career for you, and we could all brag about how we knew you before you were famous. :D
Thank you for your kind words of encouragement Catwoman. I shall begin seeking out grants now. :lol:
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I think it's the fact that nudity is always associated with the sexual in our society. We don't just see people rising their bikes nude. That's the problem with nursing in public; people associate breasts with sex. That's why there's such a push to normalize NIP.
Perhaps Austin is trying normalize other nudity as well. I don't know, I don't live there.
I think the overexposure leads to it being less about sex, just like bare legs are no longer considered sexual.
I guess one question is 'does nudity make us think of sex or does thinking about sex make us look for nudity (or as near as we can find"?
Look at me...I am well on my way to nudity researcher now. HA
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If our culture wasn't so highly s*xualized, I think I would feel differently about public nudity. If s*x were just something that kept behind closed doors and not discussed in public, pushed ad nauseum in entertainment, etc. etc. then it would not be a big deal to see a woman's b00ks. Keeping s*x a strictly private matter would free up people's bodies to be more visible IMHO.
Thank you Crimson, this is one of the reasons I love talking about things here. I have a question. :seeya:
I have NO SCIENTIFIC DATA here, but my instant (unconsidered) thought was just the opposite. That so much public discussion and sex in entertainment has caused nudity to lose meaning. I would have said. We have become so accustomed to folks waving their bodies around that we don't pay any more attention. Sort of a sub-thought that the more a society covers up the more exciting body parts become. Victorian men ogling ankles and all. :001_cool:
Now of course I am wondering where my assumption came from, and like I said "I am not a nudity researcher nor do I play one on TV", I have no facts to back this.
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I've always thought it was pretty ridiculous that basic cable can show people in traditional societies with no shirts, but not people in Western societies. Um...kind of racist double standard the FCC had going on there, since the rule holds even for non-s*x'l nudity based on WHO was wearing the clothes.
Could we please not talk about people with non standard bodies this way (with vomiting references)? Whether from weight or hormone imbalances, it's not unheard of for men to have breast growth, that is true. It is a reality that neither detracts from their male status nor deserves derision, any more than women should be made fun of because of the size of their mammaries.
I love nude beaches. And I have no problem with people doing non-s*x'l things in public topless or without clothes on. I figure if it offends someone's religious sensibilities, they should learn to avert their gaze.
Thank you Ravin. I already like this.
I am going to ramble here and I hope this makes sense. Please correct me gently if I am not clear.
I grew up in the 70s, there was a lot of talk of body awareness and acceptance. Much of women's bodies were considered secret, wrong, hidden, icky. There was a woman Betty Dodson (?) who did these consciousness raising workshops on women's bodies and sexual pleasure (also unspoken of). There was a lot of nudity as a way to show bodies were all different and all beautiful
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Dh has been very solicitous with the gin and tonics so patience please. It has been a while since I had one. And I am really not an alcoholic, though I am sure that is what all alcoholics say.
So, what I am gathering, from your responses so far, is that the diversity of opinions and resulting spirited debate is valuable and that in the process plenty of common ground is uncovered, and on a regular basis. Would this be accurate?
yes, at least for me. It also helps me a lot to be able to understand why some people think or act the way they do even if I don't end up agreeing.
There are some political mysteries out there that baffle me. I can't ask the people I know irl, I also don't ask here because I respect the rules about politics but I am just sure that someone could explain them to me. :laugh:
I really loved the 'ask a xyz' threads. So much open information.
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I have found in some threads I am in complete agreement with someone and in awe of their wisdom. A couple of weeks later, on a different thread with a different topic I think they are completely off their rocker. :) Then further down the road they post something and it feels like we are practically sisters. Still later on I will find out something about them that completely shocks me to my core and I realize that I never really knew them at all (good or bad). KWIM?
But even when I disagree with people on these boards usually the common ground I find is when someone is really hurting (like loss of family) most of the responses are incredibly supportive and understanding instead of viciously mean and cruel. Also, and this seems the bigger one, most of the people on this forum are trying to help their kids the best way they can, or may no longer have kids at home but have been on that journey in their past. Sometimes we agree and sometimes we disagree and sometimes we strongly agree and sometimes we strongly disagree on how to do that, but I do think there is that common thread among many or even most of us. It isn't always enough to keep people from falling into the ruts of rhetoric and negative sound bites during controversial topics as their dander gets up, but usually it pulls most of us back together in the long run, it seems to me.
Am I rambling? :)
:iagree: :iagree:
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I will repeat that I don't have any great concern with public nudity. Or with adults making legal choices. I will also state that when an adult makes a legal choice I don't approve of I just ignore it.
That said.
Some of the above posts seem to imply nudity is a moral failing. :huh:
Topless nudity does not necessarily equal sexuality. It is not the same category as drunkenness, or drug use, it is not an indicator of 'someone who needs attention' or lack of a job. It is just nudity. Some people like being nude.
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We see occasional nudity when we're in San Francisco. It's legal. The kids know that I don't approve of it just like they know I don't approve of all sorts of other lifestyle choices. Adults are free to make their own life choices within the boundaries of the law. That doesn't mean I have to pretend to like them or refrain from considering certain choices sinful. That said, we are all sinners and we need to worry about the beams in our own eyes rather than the specks in our neighbors' eyes.
I liked your response. To me (IMO) the key word is adult. If it is not illegal and an adult makes his or her choice, the only thing I control is how I respond. That is pretty much what I teach my children as well.
I don't care either way about topless nudity but there are many many other things out there that are also illegal and annoying. As much as possible I just ignore things that do bother me, I try to practice "don't like it, don't pay attention"
Same as I do for just about everything else that people do that's contrary to my family's values, tell them: "Not everyone shares our same values or standards. Still treat them nice."
:hurray: :hurray: like this one too. I can't control anyone else but I can control how I respond.
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Making phone calls
Me too! I thought I was the only one because of the stereotype that women love the phone. Nope..nope..nope
Even when I am calling someone who I KNOW wants to hear from me I can barely make myself do it.
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Toastmasters International has a youth leadership program. I don't know if you have to join a group or if you can just buy the materials
4H teaches youth leadership. Most counties have a youth council and follow a formal protocol for leading meetings, keeping records and minutes. I know they sell their materials online at 4H Mall.
You could also just get a copy of Robert's rules of order as a good starting place.
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Yesterday, I was happily pumping gas when the following happened:
Lady (stepping about a foot from me): I see you are famous.
Me: Whaaat?
Lady: Your Obama sticker.
Me: What?
Lady: I want to encourage you to think about your eternal soul etc. on and on...
Me: I want to encourage you to mind your own business.
Lady: I thought we were supposed to be our brother's keepers.
Me: Speechless...I drove off with my gas cap not on...
I know I was a little rude, but I had no idea what to say. How would you have handled this? I am still angry.
What exactly does your Obama sticker say? :lol: :lol: :lol:
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I have been looking at this site to buy gift cards at a discount. My plan is to buy one of the petsmart gift cards at 10% off since I usually buy my pet food from them anyway. I have seen other people use a gift card to pay and still be able to use the store rewards cards to get the sale prices. That would be a discount on a discount if it worked.
Has anyone tried this?
http://www.cardpool.com/buy-gift-cards
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Karoke? okay I know I did not spell that right.
A costume or engineering competition. How ever many teams you want, each gets a bucket of stuff, they need to design a bridge, a prom outfit or whatever in x mintues. Then vote on winner and give prizes.
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Learn something new everyday. What college was this, BTW? I don't think it will make my short list for my DD.
New College of Florida, located in Sarasota. It is in the public university system and is a small liberal arts honors college. Total enrollment around 700. No grades or GPA - pass/fail. 7 "Contracts", 3 Independent Study Projects and a successfully defended Thesis to graduate.
Most kids are clothed but even in the winter very few wear shoes.
I once over-heard a conversation that went like this.
"My roommate is going out with that boy that only wears skirts".
"Oh? which one?"
My dh went to parents weekend the first year (I was out of state visiting relatives). He took her out to dinner and afterward she had him drop her at the front parking lot. The central mall was full of kids having a 'body painting' party...paint only.
Like I said, I never asked about her participation (other than noting lack of shoes).
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Hmm. I haven't read that whole thread.
Do you (plural) think there is a way a loving, liberal mother can teach her daughter how to reduce the risks of being a victim of sexual assault without sending the message that she is the one at fault if something terrible happens?
Can a mother teach her daughter about watching her drink, having a "buddy" on outings, parking in well lighted areas, keeping her cell phone charged, etc, without sending her the message that women are responsible for preventing rape? Leave out the really lessons about "don't show cleavage" or "never drink." There are things I think most mothers, regardless of their religious or cultural background, would want their daughters to know, and the "date rape drug the drink" thing is one of them.
The fact that we don't teach boys how to protect themselves seems like a mistake to me. There are definitely things I want my sons to understand about self protection. It varies to some extent with location. There are places where pick pocketing is a common occurrence, and if you are visiting, you definitely need a primer, but of course it can also happen anywhere, so maybe it should have already been discussed. And of course, far worse happens to boys as well.
But I really thought the point of the original post is about how we are failing boys by seeing them as somehow too tough and competent to need information about self protection I am surprised that people seem to think that teaching girls about the date rape drug scenario is necessarily part of a cultural of blaming them.
Answering only for me, of course. Yes, you can teach your girls safety without implying that rape would be their fault. Just like you teach them how to drive safely or watch both ways when crossing the street. Just like the stranger danger for kids, "not everyone out there is a good person, you can't tell from the outside so here is what you do...." . It is up to the teacher to determine how positive or negative that lesson is expressed.
My original post was just that sometimes we fail to teach boys the same things we teach girls because we (rightly or wrongly) assume they are at less risk. I am not a mother of boys so I can't say why moms would not teach them the 'watch your drink' rule but apparently some don't.
Reference in the title to Patriarchy was intended to s/o off of the "modesty and patriarchy" thread.
I don't think teaching girls safety should be based on blaming them for rape, but it is used that way at times. I have seen times when there is a problem in a town with rape and the news media are all about reminding girls of the safety rules.
Reality is we do see girls asked 'well what were you doing? wearing? who were you with?" when problems arise. It's wrong. But it is reality, it happens pretty much any day in the news.
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I'm still not sure what this has to do with patriarchy and I feel uncomfortable saying that, because I'm truly not getting it. What am I missing?
As one who has personal experience with how people respond to those of us who have been through it, I can say with confidence the blame-the-victim mentality is in every group imaginable.
Sorry :blushing: I'm sure I wasn't clear.
Reefgazer and Aura are correct.
This was a spin off, I didn't put the s/o in the title so that wasn't clear', off of the 'kicked out of prom' thread and the 'modesty and patriarchy' thread.
In one of the threads (I didn't check before starting the reply) posters discuss that we teach girls the 'how not to get raped' lessons. I was just pointing out that sometimes we forget to teach boys public safety too.
This was really pointed out to me when my daughter said how many of the boys in the orientation had not heard the 'watch your drink' speech.
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When I was in high school (70's) some of the boys would try slipping 'spanish fly' into girls' drinks. It didn't do anything except make you throw up. One of my friends was very sick after someone did this. I was always cautious after that. :glare: For some reason, though it did not occur to me that boys would need to worry about this also (I don't know where my was :confused1: )
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What does that have to do with patriarchy? I'm not asking that in a judgmental way, but honestly asking.
oops, I missed a station in my train of thought. sorry
In one of the other topics we were discussing how girls are taught to 'not get raped', we also discussed that the same rules could be taught to boys on 'how not to be accused'. This got me thinking about the assumptions we have in our society about what girls need to know and what boys need to know. Does that help?
Good advice, but I was wondering this too
Sorry, apparently I leapt ahead in the conversation with out the proper build up. :mellow: I hope the reply above helps.
I agree I don't see the connection to patriarchy, but I do think it is good to teach kids how to avoid crime, especially in unfamiliar places. I actually never follow this advice. It seems like good advice, but If I order a drink in a restaurant, I just drink it. Perhaps I should rethink this!
I don't think I would apply it to a server bringing me a drink, but I don't drink something I have left on a table and then wandered away from.
I gave both of my daughters this advice when they were growing up. Some of it referred to things like date rape drugs, but I also remember way back in my college days malicious 'pranksters' :thumbdown: putting stuff in drinks. You don't know what happened to it while you were gone.
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I sew, quilt, tailor, even weave! My children can all hand-sew, but ds can only do that. He can run my machines but isn't good at it. Just bought oldest a serger for her Master's graduation because she's not taking mine! She sews gorgeous hand-made silk violin and viola bags. https://www.facebook.com/SarahsViolinBags
Those are gorgeous.
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I cannot sew and never had any desire to learn. I'm just not crafty or creative.
I would also never think to teach my kids.
oops :lol:
Now at least one of them will have a burning desire to become a fashion designer, cosplayer or reenactor. ha
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My older daughter told me a story from her semester abroad in Italy.
During orientation the teacher said "the girls will know this, but most of the guys won't" and then gave them the don't leave your drink unattended speech. You know the one "open it yourself, or watch it being poured. Don't leave it alone and throw it away and start fresh if you aren't sure"
DD said that many of the boys around her had never received this advice. She and the other girls basically responded with "really? we have known this since we were 12"
Apparently college age American students studying abroad are a goldmine. Slip something in their drinks and then steal their money, credit cards, ipads, iphones, passports, etc.
And yes I know the students have more to worry about than just theft but that is how the teacher presented it.
And yes, again, most of the boys did not know this simple advice. :(
Interesting letter from doctor about Medicaid
in The Chat Board
Posted
In your opinion has the situation improved/worsened or not really changed since ACA? I remember lots of paperwork confusion with my mom's medical treatment with Medicare but was 8 or 9 years ago, and I don't know if it has changed.
So much of the insurance paperwork mill that I encounter with our plan (group insurance through employer) has not changed either way.
I am not sure if my question falls in to the banned topics area. If it is not appropriate please let me know.