Dooley
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Posts posted by Dooley
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I just finished teaching a history class in which I included art and nudes. After getting permission from parents of course. These were middle school kids. I found some good information about my first nude - Donatellos David, which made looking at this one far more interesting and explained why he was without clothes. But this is what I wanted to share with you - there are classically, 4 different portrayals of nudity in art:
NUDITAS NATURALIS: The natural state of man as he is born into the world. "For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out" 1 Timothy 6:7. " Mans recognition of this fact should lead him to...follow after righteousness, godliness, faith, love, patience, meekness" ! Timothy 6:11.
NUTiDAS TEMPORALIS: The lack of worldy goods and possessions. While this is the natural state of man at his birth, it can also be the result of the tirals and difficulties of life which cause a man to live in a condition of poverty. This lack of worldy goods can be voluntary, however, and assumed "to the glory of God" as in the case of those who have willingly surrendered all temporal things in order to serve God completely.
NUDITAS VIRTUALIS: This is the use of nudity as the symbol of purity and innocence. IT represents those in this world who, though engaged in the activities of life, nevertheless are not overcome by the evil and temptation which surround them. IT represents the high and the desirable quality of the virtuous life.
NUDITAS CRIMINALIS: This use of nudity is the opposite of nuditas virtualis. IT is symbolic of lust, vanity, and the absence of all virtue.
Hope this helps!!
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About 8 months after we moved here, my husband was fired. We dont have much savings and he immediately began making phone calls to start free lancing. He is a video engineer. It has been a walk of faith. That first year, the next job came only when the last one stopped. Each job could be a few days, or a few weeks; so we did a lot of praying and began to see God putting things in front of us - like stepping stones. We are at the point where even when there is nothing on the horizon (like most of last year) we know He will provide.
It can be scary, trust in the Lover of your soul! :grouphug:
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OK, no one has mentioned this - you know how Jacob and MIB always referred to each other as "brother"? Is there some relation to Desmond always using that word????
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Guess that shows you how out of it I am!! I have used our older two kids for a long time, so I haven't paid any babysitters....
I did daycare about 12 years ago, and I was just thinking of what I would charge in this kind of situation. I simply could not come to a price that felt right to me. Wow, moms have to pay a lot, huh? Thanks all of you, I no longer feel like I am taking advantage of this mom! ;)
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We watch 3 very lively kids from 4 - 6 hours weekly. The mom is paying $10 an hour, but that seems too much! How much is appropriate???:bigear:
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In patient as opposed to outpatient. She is having problems with what is going on in our home, as she percieves it. Of course the obvious problems between her and our oldest...but also with me, now that I have been on her about not doing schoolwork. She started out the year great - so much so that I let her "do her own thing", as she wanted to prove she could finish this year in half the time. I took my hands off her and...she crashed. I got upset, I dropped a class, I had to pull her out of her co-op classes because she was failing, I showed her that her choices are putting graduation and GPA scores in jeopardy. Our relationship became strained. Our ds doesnt interact with her because he is afraid to do something wrong. Our youngest shares a room with her and they clash.....she needs to get away from the stressors, be able to look at them with new eyes, and find a better way to deal with .... life...
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yeah, Blue Cross Blue Shield does not cover eating disorders! We are on our own. Mercy Ministries did send us a list of places to check out until we can get accepted by them. I just pray she will COMMIT and be accepted. She will call them tomorrow!
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Yes, it is the same sister. I know its hard to understand unless you are in our shoes, but older dd has been affected with all this too. One of her gripes was that bulimic dd was restricted from the computer a few weeks ago (I thought at the time things were better and I felt more willing to treat her "normal" - she has been REALLY slacking off in schoolwork and I finally said no computer, no phone until you catch up) - even though restricted and normally compliant, she has been on the computer everyday. She is upset that her lines of communication are cut and she really needs to talk to people. Normally, I would be unmoved, but with all that is going on, I have been more lenient about punishing her for disobeying me. Older dd sees this and feels its unfair. It is. This is part of my confusion with how to handle things - where is the line that is crossed into enabling a person? Where is the line I cross when I have ceased to help and have begun to be part of the pain?
Its not as easy as one might think. I do have 3 other kids and this whole family is affected with this disorder. I can't shut them and their feelings off (though lots of times I have). It is a real juggling act.
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So we just found out Remuda Ranch will be...only $36,000. Needless to say, that can't be done
She faxed her initial application to Mercy Ministries. Our older dd lit into her and told her to light a fire, get off her behind, stop causing the family misery. It was not nice, but maybe she needed to hear it. I dont know. She has to call MM late tomorrow for the next step. I cant MAKE her commit, please pray with us that she will....
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I just found out the price of Remuda Ranch. I could buy a home for that price. My husband is giving them our financial info to see what happens, but at this point, I do not expect we can send her there. Even if the price is cut in half - thats 80K!!!!
Dd filled out the Mercy Ministries info and is going to call them tomorrow. I am fearful she will not sound very committed, that she will downplay what is going on....that she wont get in. She is balking at the 6 month time commitment. Please, please pray with me - I know ALL things are possible with God - it is clear that right now, placing her is out of my immediate control......
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We are going to try and get her into Remuda Ranch in VA. I am afraid of going bankrupt or something, but I do not know what else to do.
I have been in counseling - the biggest "problem" in the home is between my two older daughters. I told my oldest that if she cannot have a heart and treat this dd with compassion, she will have to go live somewhere else until she felt different- she will be 18 in 2 months. They have a long history of problems between them and our oldest is pretty rough. Our other daughter is pretty sweet and can't take the stuff our oldest hands out.
If you know of a program that sort of treats the family - let us know. I will also be asking the folks at Remuda Ranch.
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Thank you, dear ladies. Your posts, input and prayers mean MORE than I can tell you.
I will have dd read that NYT article too. xo
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Yes, it is Mercy Ministries. What a God-send that place looks like. I did get to have a discussion with her this morning - she seems to think she can get through it. Well, I disagree. We did come to some sort of "agreement". I told her either she willingly goes to MM, or, we will have her taken in at a treatment center and loose every cent we have (yes, I am not above playing the guilt card - I said I will have nothing to help you or your brother and sister for college, we will have nothing to live on if the economy continues as it is...). You need to go, you cant help yourself, CA wont fix it...... anyway, she said she would voluntarily go in, if she gets to go to CA first. I said well, if you start the process now, you can ask them when you can expect a decision as to when you might start. If that start date is after we planned to go to CA. Ok, you can go. If its before. You will go to treatment first.
I have read many books, discussed this with my own councilor - who I had to see for stress/health issues myself - I am at my wits end. I thank all of you for your prayers and responses. I will still be checking this and gleaning everything I can from your posts.
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I feel like I am being held over a barrel. My 16 yog has been bulimic for about a year now. I did not know until a few months ago, I found bags of vomit in her room. Panic. We saw a therapist a couple times, but dd was not into/believing/whatever the doctor said. She has been part of an Eating Disorders group, but she says she never talks because all the older women there do the talking. I thought things were getting better (she said they were, though I did find a bag of vomit about 2 weeks ago). We had a lockbox in the kitchen for awhile, that helped keep trigger foods from her, but my youngest lost the key.
Anyway, as I said, I was under the impression things were better. She and I have talked numerous times about her feelings (she and our oldest dd go do not have a good relationship AT ALL - long story, she is behind in school and I am upset with that, she misses California as we moved about 3 1/2 years ago, she doesnt like her friends and does not feel close to them, she has so many dreams that she cant fulfill yet like driving herself around, getting a job, traveling....) I have told her she must be patient, she can get a job this summer, we were going to visit CA this summer too, she can duel enroll next year...
ANYWAY. Thursday, her youth pastor took me aside and along with my dd, they told me she is vomiting DAILY and is now cutting herself.
There is a Christian rehab center in Nashville that will take girls doing these kinds of things for free. What a load off my mind! I thought we were going to court financial disaster to get her through this! But what a blessing!! She said to him, yes, she would make the call (she has to, I cannot). The pastor explained to us that its a 6 month program, and went on to stress what a good time this would be to go, she is not getting better she is getting worse.....and she agreed. We came home and she said no, I dont want to go.
She doesnt want to spend 6 months there. She wants to go to CA. I said CA is off the table for now. You will not go until after rehab. She said oh, that just makes me want to cut....
I do not know what to do now. I cant force her to go. I cant make her stop throwing up. Cant make her stop cutting - guess there are numerous thing one can cut with. My anger with her makes her upset. My calm with her makes her upset. My questions or lack of questions make her upset. My pushing schoolwork or relieving her of schoolwork make her upset. I am ****ed if I do and ****ed if I dont.....
I do not know what I am supposed to do. Am I supposed to just sit here while she destroys herself? What am I being blind about? Is there any advice for us?
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We read The Search for King Arthur by David Day, for my middle and high schooler - we know the story and this book tries to search through historical fact, other writers, etc, and come to some kind of conclusion. The pictures are also very engaging. I wanted "more" than just the story. I also love The Once and Future King; its a big book, so its for older kids. My 4th grader read Arthur and His Knights, by Mable Louis Robinson - a collection of tales.
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Our oldest went to K and 1st in public school. It was a good school. But she got the opportunity to get teased and beat up by a bully brother and sister, as well as hearing all about s@x from a little girlfriend. When the school shootings began near us (we were in San Diego), we pulled the kids and never looked back.
Its not just about academics. I have not read anyone else's thread, in case it was mentioned! My MIL, an ex-bitter-teacher, was very passive aggressive about this subject for a very long time. Of course they both told dh not to homeschool "just because everyone else is doing it" and she told me to my face, oh, just talking, mind you - that she could not count how many "homeschool kids she had to FIX over the years." Well, her ideas are not relevant to our family. Its been 11 years and it is no longer brought up....
Maybe its one thing to be truly concerned and wanting the best and then TRUSTING the parents to make the best decision with the in-laws support vs. having some kind of weird agenda because the in-laws are not close to the family (our case).
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I appreciate the car rental info too - we are driving from ABQ and need a big van. Man, they cost a lot!
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Thanks all - I went to biddingfortravel.com and it looks like I probably shouldn't use the bid sights? I will be traveling with 4 teens and 2 youngers and want to try to get us all into two rooms. I am afraid I might not get the beds.
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We want to go back and visit San Diego and would love to save money on the hotel. I have my AARP card (oh yeah, you can get this when you turn 50, who knew), AAA membership and hubby has points with Marriott Couryards. What is the best way to get the cheapest rate at a decent hotel? Have you tried Priceline or Travelocity or any of those kinds of sites that let you offer your own price? I looked at one the other day, but you put your bid out and you dont know who would accept it, whoever did would immediately charge your whole stay.... SHould I stick to getting a rate through AAA, or AARP....
Please tell me, those of you that travel alot, what is the best way! THank you!
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I lived there in the mid '80's. Dont bring a car in, its useless, the cabs and subways are more that adequate to get anyone anywhere. Go anywhere you want, the places you would probably go to are safe - I mean, its not your intention to go to the ghettos in Harlem or something - everyone goes to the hot spots! I plan on taking my 4 kids myself. Leaving our car at a relatives in Philly and taking the train in. Stay at a hotel in the city.
I am sure that any cabbie or concierge at the hotel can tell you what areas are not good to be around right now. Dont worry and have FUN!!
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My friend has had Dobies, Rotties and German Shepards. All of them wonderful, sweet dogs. I love these breeds and when we adopt another dog, it will be either a Dobie or Rottweiler.
However...yesterday we got pictures from a friend who has two Australian Shepards . Her male was attacked by two neighboring Rottweilers. These dogs had to jump 3 fences and travel over pastures to get to her dog. He was being torn apart when they got to him. Her daughter sprayed mace on the dogs to get her dog away from them. He is in pretty bad shape.
You are going to hear both kinds of stories with this breed. Rottweilers are a dog used for protection for a reason - its in their blood. Some are well behaved and some are not. It may well be a roll of the dice. They are stubborn and will you be able to be the alpha dog?
I am not a wimp - I have a Weimaraner who also needs a good alpha leader (not because of aggression, just because they are also a stubborn breed) and even though he follows me everywhere and never lets me out of his sight (I must be his queen), if he is intent on running into the woods, no amount of commanding from yours truly seems to work most times. So I wonder, if I can't MAKE this guy who loves me obey me all the time, should I even consider these other breeds ? Are you good with training and being top dog?
And on the upside...the Rottie side of this dog is halved.....
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I wash all my dry clean only stuff on delicate, and lie flat to dry. Its the drying part that will ruin/shrink your clothes.
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Up front, I have had not personal experience - but we lived in San Diego and went to the zoo often. They had a lot of them wandering around...looked like they were not the "kind" of bird one pens. But I would think, if you called a zoo, they might be able to help! :001_smile:
Bulimic daughter won't go to rehab
in General Education Discussion Board
Posted
I called House of Hope and they dont really do Eating Disorders. I was supposed to talk to one of the ladies more, but have not done it....my daughter has since made several more calls to Mercy Ministries and while balking at the time commitment and the fact she cant have contact with us during the week, seems to be interested more as time goes by.
Its almost as if all the other doors have closed and this is the only one that remains open. I pray that she keeps calling MM and goes for it! Thank you so much for thinking to post here, friend!