[Annual school supply vent]

Related rant--

Heh, at my dd's high school, they ran low on paper and could not print off anything (or, very little). I couldn't believe it. I wanted to give several teachers a few reams of paper, but couldn't afford it at the time.

I mean, come ON, a school shouldn't run out of PAPER, for Goodness' Sake!

 

 

We had a strict paper budget as teachers, like we were allowed to use one package per month or something like that, it was ridiculous because at the beginning of the year when we needed to pre-print lots of stuff for the semester we had to carefully budget out what we had enough paper to print. And obviously certain grades are more paper intensive. At least in high school the kids can copy and take notes on their own paper....in say 3rd grade it's pretty paper intensive because there are more fill-in-the-blank worksheets and more parent-teacher communication fliers to send out. 

 

I agree that the communal supplies totally take the fun out of school supply shopping and as a kid it would have driven me nuts to have to share the communal gross crayons/colored pencils. Ew. I kept my supplies nice even though they were cheap and crappy and would have been so mad to not be able to find a decent red crayon just because other kids thought it was fun to break them. Each teacher in K-2nd should have a big box of back-up crayons and then each child should be required to bring a box of crayons labeled for themselves. Otherwise how are the kids supposed to *feel* the consequences of being too rough and breaking their crayons or losing their favorite color, etc?  If you break/lose all your crayons then fine, you can use the crappy old bin of communal crayons to complete your assignments. Same goes with pencils, pens, etc. 

 

Money in schools nowadays goes all to technology and administrative nonsense. Teachers are required to equip their own classrooms out of their own pockets, which is what leads to these kinds of lists I think. I'm so tired of seeing classrooms with smart boards and then hear the same schools laying off teachers due to budget restraints. A school full of smart boards is never more valuable than one good teacher who is given adequate respect and the supplies to do his/her job well. 

[Why would someone do this? WHat would you do?]

Wow, I can't imagine how distraught you must be over this information, it's an awful burden! It sounds manipulative and suspicious that he'd even pass these out....he just spread very personal information about his poor daughter, basically re-victimizing her by opening her up to public stigma/embarrassment. Not that she should be embarrassed, she did nothing wrong, but who wants that kind of personal information put out there to EVERYONE they know?? And as others have said this is horribly unfair to you and every person this guy handed a letter because it puts you in a situation where to do the right thing you have to risk ostracizing yourself from your church and social group. He's totally playing you all, betting on fear, awkwardness, and a theology of forgive-and-forget to keep you all quiet and cover his own butt. 

 

I agree with others that you are morally obligated to report it. The pastor is legally required to report it and I'm appalled that he hasn't. But in lieu of other people being willing to hold up their end of the law you should definitely make a copy of the letter and turn over the original to the police and let them know that others have received the same letter, etc. I'd request to remain anonymous but know that you likely won't remain anonymous. I think it's time to look for a new church just in case this blows up and really, if this is the culture I'd be nervous about staying anyway. If the pastor is willing to look the other way about one molester surely he'd be willing to look the other way about another. 

 

((hugs)) I'm sorry this has happened, it really sucks and I pray it works out well with the police being able to pursue this guy. At the very least by turning in the letter you can protect a future victim from being disbelieved if they report....a letter on file + a personal report of abuse will really weigh heavily against the guy and allow the police to get a more complete picture of his history of abuse. 

[Curious: do you still have your wisdom teeth?]

I have all of mine. Only one has come up though, the rest are lurking beneath my gums threatening to ruin my orthodontia someday...or so claims my dentist. I figure I'll get them pulled if they bother me.

[Fourth edition of TWTM, asking for your help...]

Like Crimson Wife, our daughter was such an adept lip-reader that she was not diagnosed as moderate-profoundly deaf until nearly 8, and the doctors are certain she lost her hearing sometime between ages 1 and 5, possibly as a result of health issues she had in infancy. Her school recognized that she was struggling in Kindergarten and First Grade but somehow everyone missed the hearing impairment until she had been in school and struggling for 3 years.

 

Anyway, when Ana was placed with us in 5th grade she had been attending public schools and was receiving A's and B's on her report cards. Although she had some documented dyslexia and hearing impairment and was described as a slow learner we were naively sure that it was simply the result of a poor upbringing and maybe the public schools dropping the ball. I still remember the day she was sitting at home and trying to read a baby board book to my 3 year old and she stumbled over half the words. I actually had to leave the room and cry because I was so distraught to realize this otherwise normal, happy 11 year old was functionally illiterate. I set about trying to help with Ordinary Parents Guide to Teaching Reading and it was clear very early on that it was just not sinking in with her. It took a lot of digging to find the right diagnosis and remediation plan but once we did things started clicking for her and she began making real, measurable progress. It took going way back to skills most kids intuitively pick up in preschool to make progress, but once we did it was amazing how phonics started making sense for her. 

 

Our biggest sign for when Ana is over her head academically is the blank stare, refusing to work, or the crying/throwing a tantrum. This is not a child generally prone to tantrums, but invariably every time I ask her to work too far above her ability it causes her to complain, refuse to work, cry, and usually ends with her stomping off to her room. My biggest advice to parents would be if your normally compliant, happy kid is crying it's time to put the curriculum aside and reevaluate. It could mean the child needs more time, but don't waste years waiting for a magic age of maturity to arise where multiplication makes sense to them....go ahead and look into possible underlying causes early. Either your child doesn't have issues and you can proceed knowing you ruled that out, or she does have underlying problems preventing her from making the progress she could be making. 

 

 

[Fourth edition of TWTM...here's your chance to weigh in!]

This is an interesting idea. The thing that concerns me though is that non-typical learners not only do better with different resources, but they need a different approach all together, an entirely different scope and sequence, and for their learning to have personal relevance. 

 

Good point. But I also think a lot of parents with a seemingly typical kid will not read the special needs chapter in depth because they think "that's for kids with autism or intellectual disability or other bigger issues" and might miss the good advice that maybe their kid isn't just stubborn or lazy, maybe they are struggling with copy work and dictation because of dysgraphia. Or maybe they're not slow, maybe they are gifted but happen to have dyslexia and that's why they're still not reading.

 

So maybe the balance would be a small note or comment about "what if this isn't working" or "what if I know my kid has dyscalculia" at the bottom of each subject section that directs them to the special needs section. And like someone said earlier, I think a comprehensive look at the nitty gritty of doing alternative scope and sequence for each different special need a kid could have is outside the scope of TWTM. As long as there is some info to help and encourage parents to identify issues when they crop up and then a decent start at encouraging a few ideas for how to alter the plan and resources and a little advice for the most common issues to look into would be sufficient. 

[Dropping some big news on our kids tonight]

Yikes, I hope it goes well. I would preface the big news with all the whys and hows of your thoughts about moving and let them know how necessary a move is. Lay it all out logically and explain all the benefits. Then I'd say that you did put in an offer and were surprised to have it accepted right away. Expect them to be a bit shocked/angry at first but if you explain it really well and give room for them to ask questions and have input now it should help.

 

My parents once put our house on the market without telling us...I was 14 and came home and opened the garage door (I had forgotten my key) and had "for sale" signs fall out on me. That's how I found out. I was hurt and felt betrayed and furious. There was zero warning or reason for the move besides that they wanted to move to a better neighborhood. We had been in the house for 4 years, a new record for us, and I was in love with it and the entire neighborhood and my life there. We try to be extra honest with our kids because of this, I never want my kids to have that experience I had of being dragged to new homes, new states willy nilly with no warning or input. 

[nm]

That's great! He clearly knew exactly what he needed!

[Fourth edition of TWTM...here's your chance to weigh in!]

I agree with others that what I most love about TWTM are the how-to's of building skills and studying content. I think this is something unique to TWTM and it does it so well. I also agree that curriculum suggestions ought not to be taken out entirely but rather just be sure to keep them in their place. 3/4ths of each chapter should be about the why and how of teaching that particular subject at that particular age, and then a short 1/4th section at the end listing recommended resources is perfectly appropriate, as it pretty much is already in the 3rd edition. That way those people who are looking for method can ignore the curriculum lists and those who need to find a get-it-done curriculum resource can still have that available. 

 

Along the lines of curriculum suggestions Pandia Press' REAL Science Odyssey and NOEO Science are both good solid classically minded curriculums that might be appropriate to recommend. Both are secular I believe. 

[Fourth edition of TWTM...here's your chance to weigh in!]

Imagine.more and others--are you at all familiar with how the Logic of English course (Denise Eide) uses the O-G system? Any thoughts on how this works for struggling learners?

 

I haven't used it myself but I have looked at it. Like Slache I feel that circling the correct word vs writing it out does undermine the multi sensory aspect of O-G. Most programs use either index flashcards or letter tiles to manipulate words without requiring too much writing at first, the circling doesn't give the same benefit as moving physical letters around. 

 

I think maybe it would be best to start a specific thread on the Learning Challenges board to hash out the specifics of which programs should be recommended as a first course of action, back up, etc. There are several parents there with a wealth of education and experience to draw from and we could probably come up with better/more comprehensive/more concise feedback for you if we put our heads together and came up with an answer as a group. 

 

Personally I feel LOE would be fine for a young or mild-moderate dyslexic student, but that it's both too comprehensive (like it includes handwriting instruction) and too fast (progresses pretty quickly through the 70+ phonograms) for an older or severely dyslexic student. And OPGTR is such a solidly phonetic-based resource that I don't know that there's *enough* difference between how it and LOE work to justify trying LOE if OPGTR is truly not working for a kid. Typically what I recommend is OPGTR and if that doesn't work after 1-2 years or by age 7 then a parent needs a professional evaluation to uncover possible dyslexia or other issues. If it is dyslexia at that point I'd refer them straight to Barton Reading. I don't like to mess around with curriculums that just don't work and Barton by and large really does work. It's pretty impressive the way it's laid out, and I can see that it's even superior to the O-G program I was trained in actually, which is why I use Barton as our main spine and supplement with activities/extensions. Any program that can take an 11 year old kid who is illiterate, hearing impaired, intellectually disabled, dyslexic, and adhd and get her reading in 18 months while keeping her self-esteem intact and without requiring acrobatics on the part of me (the parent/teacher) is a solid program. It can be used on kids with just dyslexia even faster and more effectively with zero extended activities. 

[Fourth edition of TWTM...here's your chance to weigh in!]

Like Crimson Wife I would love to see a more extensive Special Needs chapter outlining good, research-based programs. A few paragraphs on when/how to recognize the typical reading program (of which OPGTR is one of the best imo!) isn't working and where to go from there. With 20% of people in the world having dyslexia, as proven by brain imaging and testing, dyslexia identification and remediation alone is a big topic that ought to be somewhere in there with teaching reading in the preschool and elementary years. Several of us on the WTM Struggling Learners board are trained Orton-Gillingham tutors now because we found it worked. And certain programs, like Barton Reading and Spelling, are particularly classical in how they approach things, with dictation and a strong emphasis on phonics. I'm sure those of us on the Struggling Learners board would be happy to help advise on those topics more specifically OR Susan Barton, the owner of the Barton Reading System is very approachable (just call her # on the website or e-mail her) and I wonder if she would be willing contribute to a small section on dyslexia and reading difficulties. 

 

Even just a few paragraphs one when/how to go about seeking testing to make sure learning issues are identified early would be nice. So many parents are told "they'll outgrow it" or "just wait, he'll learn to read/master multiplication when he's ready" and they miss a lot of opportunity to be on top of these things early on and then freak and feel they can't possibly fit in a classical education.

 

Simply Classical is a wonderful resource that ought to be listed. I found it to be a nice complement to TWTM. Not as practical in the everyday as TWTM but certainly inspiring and helpful in giving a starting point for providing a classical education to even children severe special needs. Her Memoria Press curriculums for special needs children are really quite lovely and look like something you would recommend anyway. 

 

To extend on what someone above said about your audio recordings you definitely must include the URL's for those under each appropriate subject! Specifically I would happily buy a 4th edition even though I have a perfectly good version already at home if you included your writing talks in essay form within the book! Those have been real gems, like above the tone of your talk helped but just the content was also good in helping me to understand exactly how writing instruction with a real live child would look. 

 

I'm so excited that an updated edition is coming out. TWTM has been our homeschooling bible from the start and I'm so glad I read it early on :) 

 

[Catholics - recent homilies? curious, not a debate]

We've had a homily on that topic but certainly not 3 in a row. Generally the homilies focus on the readings, as is best, with occasional topical ones like on this current issue, which is also appropriate. I'd be annoyed by any repeat homilies, sounds either lazy or like hyperfocusing on one issue.

[School accommodations for dylsexia and dysgraphia]

OneStep, I love how your DD's science teacher gave her a different option for the take-home assignments, that's great! 

 

Storygirl, the school sounds excellent! I think you have a good chance of them really knowing how to help, and the important thing is that remediation is happening with OG and if that's happening then you can just focus on the basic appropriate accommodations are happening with the regular classroom teacher so things don't get overwhelming. 

 

A few things I'll add (earlier I was typing on my phone).

 

For writing shortened writing assignments are totally fine and appropriate. Just make sure they still hold them accountable for good writing. And maybe they can not count off points for spelling but still require punctuation. Basically so the kid isn't so overwhelmed with a million hard things to remember. Keep it to just one hard thing :) Later you can use remediation time at school or with a tutor to teach them how to use the Franklin Spelling Ace. Once they're good with that then they can allow them to use that but require proper spelling in written work. This way they're getting accommodations but gradually weaning down to less intensive accommodations over time as they build skills. You want to keep things doable but still challenging. 

 

They can instead of a whole page on a topic allow them to write 10 bullet point notes. Or an outline. Or they can answer a pre-set list of questions. Or they can simply write half a page, or be allowed to type it at home, etc. Anything that makes it easier, but again really focus on upping the requirements gradually over time as they improve. 

 

Oh and for math if the issue is more number sense vs ability to memorize facts then I definitely think shortened homework assignments are a good idea. Just focus on them understanding the concepts vs practicing tons of calculations. But if the issue is more memorization vs number sense then shortening assignments might backfire. At some point though a lot of people opt to give the child a crutch of a calculator or multiplication table to do assignments with so they can move on with understanding higher math and not get caught up with the fact that they can't remember 9 x 7. 

[School accommodations for dylsexia and dysgraphia]

In my experience schools love accommodations and hate remediation. Remediation is work, accommodation allows them and the student the appearance of progress without the need for actual progress necessarily. So while certain accommodations are sensible (i.e., my daughter needs an FM system in classroom situations to hear better and needs preferential seating) many others (multiple choice spelling tests with 2 choices, severely shortened assignments, etc) are often a cop-out so they can say "well, she's making B's and doing great in language arts!" ....nevermind the fact that the kid is still illiterate ;)

 

Anyway, for a dyslexic student what you want is consistent, measurable remediation in the dyslexia and possibly math. This means you should push for them to do one-on-one or small group Orton-Gillingham tutoring if your DD hasn't already had 3 years of it at home. 

 

And then in the classroom so they still have access to the content what you want is ideally the ability to tape record lectures/lessons, and notes typed/written for them by the teacher. Now, being handed notes does mean they will struggle to remember as much material vs if they wrote it themselves so I'd work with them to develop skills like highlighting vocab words in the notes and basically color-coding the heck out of it so they're engaged in the lecture but not distracted trying to just spell the stuff the teacher is saying. Also, ask about audio books especially for literature class, those can really help dyslexic kids keep up.

 

For spelling tests insist on a different spelling test based on their OG words, NOT the topic-based list the rest of the class gets. They should still be able to handle a 10-20 word list but it needs to be on their level and graded accurately.

 

An example of bad spelling accommodations: My DD was given the same topic-based list as everyone else except half the words (10) and multiple choice where one was correctly spelled and one was incorrectly spelled and she had to circle the correct one. She never remembered ANY of those words no matter how much we studied and she did all the assignments....they were just not phonetic so they were way above her head. Now with Barton I give her weekly 10 word spelling tests and she gets 90-100% every time and she is really retaining them. Accommodations should make it easier to learn, not just make it easier to sit in the class. 

 

 

[Keeping children clothed when company is over...]

Um, if it were my house I'd say we have a no-naked policy outside of the bathroom or babies. If it were someone else's house I'd just not visit for awhile and assume he'll outgrow it soon since he's about kindergarten age.

 

Occasional or incidental nudity at 4 is no big deal to me (like when changing clothes and needing help or forgetting to close thr bathroom door) but just running around stark naked?? Why?! And regardless of which house I was at I'd definitely tell a child I didn't care for them hugging me naked...that's just rude really for the parents to allow.

 

And am I the only one who thinks that, regardless of your own family rules on nudity that if your host/guest expresses their discomfort tactfully like the OP mentioned she and her husband have, you should take their feelings into consideration and ask the kid to put on pants? It just seems inhospitable not to. I mean, my SIL and BIL don't like red meat so I try real hard not to plan red meat for dinner the days they visit. Similarly MIL went through menopause a few years ago and was hot all the time so I made extra sure to put thin sheets/covers and a fan in their room. They're my guests and are nice and would never insist on these things but if I want them to visit I should be welcoming with a nod to their preferences. And yeah, I allow some couch jumping at my own house but never would I presume to let my kids do it at someone else's house unless I knew they were cool with it!

 

So the nudity aside I'd say the parents are being rude and the OP is being a good friend just trying to find a way to hang out with them and yet be comfortable.

[Speaking of Careers: What about being highly educated but in the 'wrong' fields?]

Also, he can take workshops and seminars with your local chapter of AFP. http://www.afpnet.org/?noredirect=1

 

Check with United Way and Idealist.org for listings of local jobs too- many non-profits don't bother with craigslist or general job listings.

 

Another option. He can make a list of jobs in the area he'd like and then call and schedule informational interviews.

 

He can also start studying some basic fundraising and non-profit management concepts. Kim Klein was a woman who finished her MDiv, went off to intern at a church shelter, fell into fundraising because it was desperately needed for them to keep the doors open, and never looked back. She has authored a number of excellent books on the subject. I've attended workshops with her and she is amazing. Penelope Burke is another solid read.

 

It takes more than applying for jobs to break into a new field oftentimes.

 

BSA is an organization that is almost all fundraising and marketing but rapid advancement possibilities.

 

No need to tell any potential employer about having kids until after he is hired.

Yep, he's doing all those. I'll pass those books along, they sound right up his alley!

 

Unfortunately during his last interview he was asked if he had kids and what ages, so of course he answered. Hard to dodge if you're asked outright and I'm sure they'd say it didn't factor in but sometimes I think it does to certain people.

 

Funnily enough his sister is also struggling to find a job and she has an ivy league education and a masters degree and one year grantwriting experience.

[Speaking of Careers: What about being highly educated but in the 'wrong' fields?]

We are pretty much in the same boat. Dh is both overeducated and undereducated for his field. People want to pay less for people with a BS or the jobs he wants (teaching, mostly) require a PhD. So he's stuck in the middle. He wants to teach, not do research and write grant proposals, and we can't afford more higher ed, so we are stuck in the middle. Plus his field (STEM, even) is really oversaturated right now. It's a tough position to be in. I would leave the advanced degree off the application of write a cover letter addressing his degrees and hopes for how he'd fit into the position. Best of luck.

I'm sorry you guys are in the same position, and in a STEM field too, how frustrating!

[Catholics, please recommend some books...]

Here's a cute little book that we have: https://www.chcweb.com/catalog/Religion/ForLittleOnes/TheMassBookforChildren/product_info.html

[Speaking of Careers: What about being highly educated but in the 'wrong' fields?]

Yes he's applied probably 70/30% in favor of religious non-profits because we figured he'd have more respect for his Mdiv in the religious ones and obviously it's nice to work in an openly Christian atmosphere. The problem is he has no clear experience in fundraising and hasn't found the right place to give him a chance to prove himself. He's gotten a few interviews for such positions but usually gets turned up for someone younger with a degree that maybe lent itself more specifically to fundraising skills. One told him afterwards they'd love him and would have hired him for a better position but felt the position they were looking for paid too little and with a family he'd move on in a  couple years due to low pay. They must not know how little pastors get paid   :lol:  

 

[Speaking of Careers: What about being highly educated but in the 'wrong' fields?]

Hm, interesting. That had never occurred to me and likely not to him I bet. Has anyone else here done that when job hunting?

 

Now I do know the entry-level BSA job he just lost to someone with a BS in education did run a background check so he needed to list it there. But I bet not everything would require that. 

[Speaking of Careers: What about being highly educated but in the 'wrong' fields?]

Reading over the threads geared towards women suddenly looking for jobs in new fields or after a long break to raise children, etc. it occurred to me that a lot of these fields, while great, would be tougher to break into if you had *too much* education in the wrong field. 

 

Specifically, I'm thinking of my husband and his job hunt. He's got degrees, a BS in Sociology and an MDiv from a respected seminary. But, he's no longer working in ministry for various reasons and looking for jobs in other fields has been extremely difficult. His Sociology degree qualifies him for things like social work and entry level nonprofit work, which he'd like to do, but his Masters and 5 years experience as a full-time pastor at moderate sized churches mean a lot of places are not wanting to hire him because they think he'll ditch them after a year or two for something better. Ie, he's "overqualified". Jobs for which a Masters is appropriate also often don't want him because he's got the wrong degree and/or no experience in their specific field. So it's this odd place to be in. 

 

He's considered going back to school for a degree that wouldn't take too long but would pay well, but then we worry even if he did they'd overlook him because of the Masters of Divinity, kwim? 

 

So what do you do when you have a degree in humanities or religion or liberal arts and need to just get a job to pay the bills but your degree(s) make you look like a short-term candidate? Are there any careers that want a Bachelors/Masters but are more flexible in which field those degrees are in? 

[Name a retail establishment that wouldn't be terrible for employment]

I enjoyed working at Petsmart for years, and they offer health insurance to part-time employees. If you get tired of the register monotony you can work in the small animal/fish department which is more fun.

 

My dh loved working in coffee shops in college; like someone else said everyone there is in a pretty good mood because they're getting their coffee fix :) It's similar to waitressing but much slower pace, not quite as good of tips of course.

[Teasing]

But calling someone "dawg" DOESN'T make sense.  Even if you don't mean a literal dog, it's still a perjorative term.  (re the expression: she looked like a dog= she was UGLY)  So it's incomprehensible why it's acceptable to call someone a dawg, unless that is slang for their social group or area and applied to ALL people. Would that same boy greet one person with "dawg" and the next with "sheep" and have them be equally acceptable and non-demeaning?

 

Are there unwritten rules of acceptable teasing?  If it's actually a linguistic pattern, it should have rules.

 

Dawg is a totally common thing to call people as an affectionate like man-friend term. As someone said 'What's up, dawg?" is especially common but it's been used in other contexts too and it's never meant negatively, always a positive "you're cool, you're my buddy" kind of way. Dawg has been around since I was a teenager, lol! 

 

There are even more new words to keep track of now, it's overwhelming! Like "fleek", I don't get that one and it comes from an obscure source too but just somehow got into the normal slang for teens at the moment. My DD13's older sister says all sorts of crazy stuff I have to look up, lol!

 

Anyway, in the circumstance of this post I'd say the boys' teasing could be crossing the line into not-nice depending on their tone. You'd need to see/hear it in person. My guess is that since they say it to everyone that it really is friendly teasing and then he took it wrong and then they didn't know how to take his reaction so they thought it was funny and now kinda antagonize him. So while it was okay it may have crossed a line into not okay.

 

I think the best you can do is to be present and aware, try to witness some of the teasing first-hand if possible so you can help your DS realize if it's mean or friendly teasing. Then you can cater your teaching to that observation. If it seems to be mean-spirited encourage him to stand up for himself by either a) walking away or b) letting them know in socially acceptable ways that he doesn't like it. To say in a whiny voice "I don't like that, stop!!!" would not be best. But if he could play it off a bit, act cool, and say "Man, that's lame" or "Okay, that's enough." and roll his eyes and walk away that would get the message across without him sounding like he's complaining. Even better if he could say "Man, that's lame, let's get back to practicing" or "I need to go ask the coach something" as a way to direct everyone back to practicing or give him an excuse to walk away. 

 

If it is friendly teasing I think Lecka has some good ideas with maybe teaching him how to tease back. He might not be into teasing but then at least he can choose whether to tease back or not play along. I know I'm not one to tease much myself and so I wouldn't blame him for not playing along but it should be because he chose not to, not because he doesn't know how or took it offensively when it wasn't meant to be. Tween boys can be a lot more into good-natured teasing than girls, especially in sports, so it may just need to be a social skill he has to learn. 

 

And yeah, I think I would request that the coach try to keep an eye on it more closely and really help you figure out for real if it's good-natured or not. Or he can choose to keep the boys busier so there's less time for goofing off. Either way he should be supporting a healthy team atmosphere and be a bit more accommodating. 

[Best cloth diaper?]

Wow!

 

Ok, my experience--I used some Motherease diapers, and the Nikki, I think. Any time I used the covers that had velcro on them, the diapers did not keep the poo in (I mean the liquidy stuff) and the covers did not seem to be waterproof. The Nikkis also were very thin.

 

So, which ones have leg elastic that really holds stuff in, and are thick and absorbent? I ended up just going to prefolds and vinyl pants with pins, as I said, because they were adjustable and I could pull them tight enough (the dipe) by the legs and tummy, and then put the pants over and the pants were waterproof and I didn't get leakage at the legs. I always felt that the covers were easily dampened. I changed diapers frequently, too.

 

(And I also used environmentally safe flat disposables with a diaper cover, but those were just like a 6 X 10 or so piece of menstral pad without a plastic back--not even THAT absorbent--I used those for a good 2 months, but they were awful, so I switched.)

Like someone else mentioned, the gussets on the covers make a huge difference! I like Thirsties covers or my own home sewn ones because I make them with gussets. It holds blowouts better than disposables imo. Also elastic along the back waist is necessary to avoid back blowouts, and Thirsties covers have that as well. My thirsties have mostly lasted through 3 kids so i'm happy with them.

[Sharing a "works for us" tip]

Good idea! I've actually thought about doing this for my 4 and 7 year old boys because they seem baffled by what a clean room ought to look like, lol, but I wasn't sure it would work. So you just have the pictures on the iPad and he glances at that as he works?

[Need audio curricula recommendations for 14 yr old with SEVERE dyslexia]

Oh no I didn't want to suggest you were forcing him to read, I was thinking more about school and how there's a lot of pressure and expectation to try to read there. I know we struggled with that with DD when she went for a semester during Barton. It's great your son is motivated by environmental print, my dd had given up on even noticing it until very recently!