Dolphin
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Posts posted by Dolphin
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A person can cuss me out and tell me the world is better off without me and 15 minutes later I'm functioning and interacting with that and person like it never happened. And this is a person very close to me. If that was by a random person or even aquaintance I would think it was good it didn't effect me. Seems hard to draw boundaries when I don't feel anything though. I'm trying to justify it based on facts but it seems like a lot of work. Just ignoring it all might be easier.
This is why I would recommend a counselor if you can find one. It's the feelings. Things are not sliding off my back anymore. My new emotion is anger. I have gotten mad, and that is new for me.
My husband says that each time I get mad, say "no, that is not okay." set a new boundary, and THEN forgive, even if no forgiveness is asked for, that a few days later, he notices I am happier.
I look at this year and say, wow! I have been mad a lot. My dh agrees, but says I have also been happier than I ever have been before.
I have a close family member who is one of my toxic people. I can not walk away from them, but once I put one boundary up, the next was easier, and so on. Best of luck.:grouphug:
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YES!
I am in lots of counseling about this right now. Have realized 2 long time "friends" were not friends after all, and a family member who was really using me as her punching bag.
It was hard, but I got rid of the "friends" one at a time. It was so worth it. My life is more peaceful now. I have more time for the friends that I enjoy and don't just suck up all of my time and energy.
Ask yourself, are you being a forgiving person, or a people pleaser? When you are trying to make everyone else happy, do you change what you and your family (spouse and kids) would be most happy doing? If so, then it is a problem.
:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:Hard work, but well worth it. We are all so much happier now that mom is growing a backbone
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:grouphug: You deserve a little whine.
:iagree:
:grouphug:You HAVE had a difficult year! Don't worry about schooling yet. See how the next few days play out and how independent your DS12 is able to be before making decisions about how much each child should still do. It will be fine. Give yourself some grace here.
:grouphug::grouphug:
:iagree:, just try to get math in a few times a week and maybe now would be a good time for Liberty Kids?
So far so good today. He's even figured out how to feed himself a little bit. I don't know how he does it! We have an appt tomorrow for the ortho so we'll find out more then. Thank you all for the wonderful ideas dealing with this and his little brother. I loved saraha's advice for my 9yo. Great idea!I won't get my hopes up for waterproof, but received some helpful info about a Gore cast covering that may work. We'll just get through it.
Dh will be able to come home tonight. Hopefully, he can help with a shower.
I'll let you know how tomorrow goes!
Good. You can do it, remember, just keep swimming:001_smile:
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:grouphug::grouphug::grouphug:
I don't know if this will help, but try to re-frame the situation, especially with the personal care stuff. Be matter of fact, and try to get yourself less embarrassed. The more ok you are with things, the less it will bother him.
Find the positives, try to turn the care fun. Silly things like flying airplane with a few of his spoonfuls. Talk to him about his history, what he was like as a baby, what he liked etc.... Make a joke about you guess he is too old for a raspberry blown on his tummy like you used to do when you changed his diapers. Just light hearted and fun. Also, go for potty humor, 12 year old boys LOVE that.
You can also make comments on some things, like "one day you are going to have to do this for me." when feeding.
Watch movies, audio books and discussions.
I had to step into a different role with my mom for awhile. It was embarrassing at first, and she really hated it, but now years later she says how it is nice to know she can count on me like that, and that she feels closer to me because of it. I found that faking being okay with it all made her more relaxed, and then I wasn't faking anymore. Everytime she got embarrassed or annoyed I just stated that there was no need. We all need help sometimes.
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No, we do not follow the schedule. They had to put a schedule in as the publishers wanted it. Do what works for your family and build up to it slowly.
We are not morning people either. Our "quiet time" is often in the morning after breakfast and morning prayer. DS, takes his independent work into his room and works on that and dd plays in her room, while I wake up and have my computer time. We then school however it works that day based on activities. Days where we are at home we finish between 1 and 2 usually, if we have activities, we can be finishing after supper. Just depends.
We also do a four day week (except Math which is 5 days). It gives us a catch up day or a field trip day. That might help with your work schedule.
Best of luck.
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Nope.Noooooo!
Head on over to Facebook. Lots of folks would love to talk politics with you, I'm sure :001_smile:.
No desire whatsoever.I was just thinking how nice this board has been this election season and how much I like the politics free space. Thanks moderatorsI'm thankful it's against board policy here. It's nice to have a place where politics aren't shoved in your face. I consider WTM my safe-haven during election time. :DNooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo! It gets beyond nasty.That is all.
Nope.Nope, nope, nope.
The country is too politicized.
AHHHHHHH! This is the only place of refuge on the internet. FB is driving me bonkers. I like the ban on politics :):iagree::iagree:
I like living in my Pollyanna sunshine world, political talk just ruins that. I think the political discussion ban is one of the best things about this board.
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I voted other. My daughter is a lefty, and so far she is doing great with righty scissors. She loves cutting and it is a joyful time for her. If she struggled, or ever does I will get her lefty ones.
I guess I am doing that with most things. I am teaching her handwriting left handed and I am using HWT as that teaches me how to teach her, but as she is in a right handed world I am only planning on getting special things for her being left handed when a problem arises.
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I would second reading the well trained mind. It is a good place to start.
History and Science, honestly they can go to the back burner while you get going. Maybe get a fun science kit to do together as you get started. This is a good one, it has a lot of different hands on activities, making snow, etc... Don't worry about teaching it, just have fun. I would not jump into a heavy science curriculum even if he loves science. Experiments, Magic school bus, popular mechanics for kids, a science museum or such the rest of this year.
I pulled my son after 2nd grade. Just focus on Math and filling in the holes you will find. There is plenty of time for everything else. I jumped in with the academics, and then burnt out, so I had to stop and deschool. I wish I had done that first. We did educational things (like the big bag of science) but it got us out of the B&M school mentality. This is my 3rd year and I finally feel like I have found my homeschool groove.
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Well, in addition to the fact that Sandusky is old and there probably wasn't as much urgency to give him a longer sentence (plus the previously mentioned issues of different judges/venues), Sandusky is/was famous and somewhat powerful/influential and I assume had the money to hire a good legal team to defend him. I'm guessing the mom in question was appointed a public defender. Plus, while Sandusky's crimes were vile and horrible, he didn't put any of his victims into comas or almost kill them.
:iagree:
Plus, it sounds like there might be further charges/cases to come against him. He also is now a registered sex offender and even if he does get out of jail at 98 will have to follow all those rules.
I think it also comes down to hard and fast proof. There are lots of things that all add up to the fact that Sandusky is a sexual predator. No doubt in my mind, or the juries, or judges. However, nothing hard and fast. No DNA, no smoking gun so to say. The mom however, there are doctor reports, and an admission of guilt.
She was very pregnant when she did that. She has to be mentally ill. Has to be.Those children are going to be a foster family's nightmare. Or grow up with the grandmother who raised their mother. There is an intense history of abuse. Those poor kids.
I saw she might have been abused, but I didn't see where they said her mother was the abuser. I did read that the mother is the one who found the two year old and got her help. The mom also testified.
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Great news, you are in my prayers. PM me with any questions you have once you have the chemo talk.
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Have her try the TT sample online. My son loved it and asked me to get it for him, we have had smooth math time since.
When did you start with her? Was it 3rd grade? I am asking as I started homeschooling my son in 3rd grade. We did SM to start, and we found so many holes in ds's math education. So we tried MM, and a few other things. I finally read this blog post
http://nancextoo.livejournal.com/124221.html
I had ds try the online sample, ordered it, installed it on the computer and other than scrolling through the scores once a week to make sure he was doing the work, I took a 3 month break from teaching him math and let the computer do it. We were both happier. That break then led both of us to not dread math. We then discovered LOF and BA which we do as supplements to TT as spine. I don't think we could be doing "fun" math without TT doing the spine.
With dd I am doing Miquon and eventually will do SM with her as I think it is more rigorous (I am NOT saying TT is behind, I think it is right on level, it is just not ahead) and as I am homeschooling her from the start that should work. I would have loved for ds to not have had all the problems, but, I really hated him hating Math.
Best of luck.
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I still wonder who that guy was last week. The one in the apt at the beginning of the show? I wish I owned series 1 so I could go back and watch it. I have limited bandwith so no netflix :tongue_smilie:
My guess was Bayfire? Rumpel's son.
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what about mixing some stinging nettle in there? You wear gardening gloves don't you? (I am not being serious, just teasing:lol:)
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It doesn't bother me.
My mother was a breast cancer casualty.
I am undergoing treatment after my early diagnosis in May and three separate surgeries.
It doesn't annoy me. I'm not on every bandwagon but I do think bringing awareness encourages screening. Early detection saves lives.
:iagree:
I think part of the hope is that you see it everywhere and it reminds you to do your breast self exam. There are lots of other diseases that are horrible, but not many that you can catch so early by knowing your own breasts. Your yearly pap is every important, but if you saw pap awareness, is that going to motivate you to go call the doctor and spend money to get one. Breast cancer is one you can check for, on your own, for free.
So, those annoyed by the pink, are you doing a monthly self breast exam? When you see pink, ask if you have done yours this month.
I never did them, as I have no family history of breast cancer. My tissue was biopsied from another surgery and I am now in a high risk category with a 20% chance of developing breast cancer in the next 20 years. I do my monthly self check now, and yearly mammogram, and yearly gyn, and yearly oncologist. Early detection is so important.
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Is it at the edge of the property where in anyway the could mistake it for communal ground? We have this one area of our garden, that blends into the city part.
Other than that, no, and I would say something. In fact I did very nicely ask the clueless dad who put his son's new basketball hoop up right in front of the nicest part of my garden if he would please move in as I did not want a ball smashing my lilies. He was most apologetic and moved the hoop. No bad feelings, just clueless.
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A blessing to those small ones who rinse their oatmeal bowls before loading them into the dishwasher, but why o why can they not rinse the sink? A pox on cleaning little specks of dried cement (i mean oatmeal from the sink)
A plague on the dh who can not fit the baking tray into it's spot so decides to rearrange some kitchen cabinets to "help" me without telling me, and then forgets where he put everything. I still can't find my Christmas cake mold.
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I would give her a break from narrations, maybe even a full year. Work on Outlines instead. I was an English Major and outlines are what makes writing easy later on. If she is really crying and not liking it, she might like the outlines. They are patterns, and different looking (and contain a lot of the same information as a narration) Keep up with the spelling, handwriting, grammar and other support subjects, but drop the narrations for awhile. Best of luck, my son (also 10) had been in a major writing slump, he has just come out of it and is now plugging happily through WWS.
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I have had to carefully examine myself and the goals for the children this week in regard to this subject. A strong command of the English language is an academic goal we have for the kids and I do believe that a solid grammar foundation is an important part of it. Please remind me of that the next time I flip out, okay?! :lol:
:001_smile::001_smile:
I have temper tantrums about different subjects at different times too. Usually when the kids are just really taking a loooonnnnngggg time to get something and I have explained it every way I can think of. I am glad you are sticking with it. I resisted for years, but now that I am in it, I can see what an amazing grammar program it is. However, it is an amazingly overwhelming program if you don't reduce it. As soon as someone told me odds or evens, I remember my teachers in "real" school (said snarky a la the jean thread) assigning us odds or evens. It is a tool for us to utilize not to be ruled by.
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Have you looked at Phonetic Zoo? It is just the words, no busy work. My son has been a totally different kid with spelling since the switch.
See if you can find spelling and the brain by Andrew Pudewa online, it totally changed the way I think about spelling.
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normally I have a nice bland reply, but on my last snarky day my response was "oh, I don't let them out of their crate long enough for them to go to a "real" school." :glare: I was feeling particularly annoyed by all the people questioning the inner workings of my family though.
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All Creatures Great and Small by James Herriot
All Things Bright and Beautiful by James Herriot
These are great!, and after reading there is a wonderful TV series (with some familiar faces in it)
Check our Honey for a Child's Heart and Honey for a Teen's Heart and Honey for a woman's heart all by Gladys Hunt.I love Honey for a Child's heart.
Enid Blyton, The famous Five series or the adventure series would be good. Even though they aren't mysteries or about animals I also loved her Boarding school books when I was that age(Mallory Towers, St. Claire's)
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Oh, I also cook dinner in the morning at the same time as breakfast and leave it sitting on the stove.I keep my sanity by keeping a strict schedule. I also never plan morning things because they always ruin my momentum. Only afternoon activities and schoolwork must be done (more or less) in order to go.Learn to love the crockpot :)
:iagree::iagree:
Sounds boring, but we have a weekly rotation of dinner. We can deviate when we want to, but I know on monday we are having crockpot bean or lentil soup. It takes the planning out, we have it typed, printed and on the fridge.
DH does the washing up in our house, and I usually sit at the kitchen table and do the prep for the next nights dinner while he washes up. We also talk about our days (and sometimes end up in water fights:D) It has turned chores we both hate into something I look forward to.
We over scheduled activities our first two years. I would keep cutting them back and they would creep back in, this year is my first to hit October without a meltdown. It takes time to find your homeschool rhythm.
As for other kids, we have found that ds is most productive at his little sisters ballet class where he has nothing else to do:D
Consoling a young adult about a *choice* she has no say over
in General Education Discussion Board
Posted
:grouphug::grouphug:I am sorry for all of you. I will pray for your sister and all of your family.