AndyJoy
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Posts posted by AndyJoy
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Some of you may remember that I asked for advice (ok, permission!) about feeding on demand versus scheduling feedings. Once I largely ignored the clock, things were a lot better, though he still wasn't very happy. His poop started turning green and frothy and he was spitting up a lot. From reading about these symptoms on a La Leche League website, I discovered that I have an oversupply of milk, so Keaton was not getting satisfied at each feeding because he was getting too much foremilk. After reading this, I tried out my breast pump, I got 4 oz. in 4 min. from one side on the lowest setting! Now that I only nurse on one side at each feeding and use a towel to catch the spray at the beginning, he's doing much better and going 2-3 hours between feedings rather than 1 hour!
Thanks for your help!
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No, my lunch money was never stolen. However, several of my belongings were stolen or intentionally ruined by classmates.
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When my great grandma turned 95, we had a hard time buying her gifts. While we were at the grocery store picking out yet another bouquet of flowers, my sister saw an adorable little teddy bear and suggested it. The one we bought was purely decorative--I think it was a Boyd's bear and was about 6 inches tall wearing a little dress and holding knitting needles/knitting. Grandma adored it! It turns out that she was so poor as a child that she never had a doll or stuffed animal. The next year, when her speech was gone and she spent most of her time in bed, we got her a larger soft cuddly bear. She slept with it every night until her death at age 97 1/2.
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For your cyber cheek-pinching enjoyment :001_smile:.
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I have an idea that builds on the coupon idea but makes the tree look full without buying lots of stuff . What if you came up with a bunch of ideas for outings/experiences/quality time, then filled a box with pertinent items that you already own, wrap it, and make it a guessing game? Once they guess (or give up), you can give them a corresponding coupon. Some of these would be individual gifts, others would be group gifts. You could set rules for when they could be redeemed so you have sufficient notice and they don't do them all in one month!
Some ideas:
1. Baking cookies with mom (cookie sheet, cookie cutters, apron, ingredients, etc.)
2. Movie night (popcorn, candy, soda, blanket, remote, couch pillow)
3. Go to work with Dad (one of dad's outfits he wears to work, items relating to his job, menu for a restaurant dad eats lunch at on a work day)
4. Picnic at the park (picnic blanket, toys for the park, juice boxes, snacks)
5. Backyard or living room camp out (sleeping bags, flashlights, s'mores fixings)
6. Stay up past bedtime with mom or dad (hot cocoa/tea/cider mix, game, read aloud book, movie, Legos, whatever your kids would want to do with you after bedtime)
7. Zoo day (stuffed animals, whatever items you would take with you to the zoo)
8. Spa/makeover day with mom (nail polish, makeup, mirror, brushes, hair stuff)
9. Any thing you can think of that your kids would love to do with you!
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I feel your pain. :D My DAD is exactly like that. Now I'm a big talker (starting w/full sentences to strangers at 18 mo.!), and so is my mom, but my dad can out-talk both of us! If I call him for a specific reason, I have to address it immediately or it will get completely lost in the deluge! He drives dh crazy when he visits, because dh likes to talk when he's in the mood, but he doesn't care about what my dad wants to talk about, which is mostly what is going on with every person he knows (and my dh doesn't!).
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I used to babysit a boy who was a headbanger. At age 5, his parents came up with the solution of letting him rock himself to sleep in the living room armchair, then they'd carry him to bed later. His "rocking" was basically violently throwing himself back and forth in the chair so that it rocked and he bounced forward and backward. It worked well for him, and it got to the point where he would rock himself for 30 min. then go get into bed and sleep, rather than needing to be carried after falling asleep in the chair.
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He will take a pacifier sometimes, but not very long (maybe 5 minutes, max!) if I'm the one holding him. He will suck on it much longer for dh, but has trouble keeping it in his mouth for very long.
Is there a reason to limit how much time he spends at each breast at a particular feeding? Soreness has not been an issue for me since week 2. I have been limiting him to 20-25 minutes on each side and burping in between and afterwards.
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You should feed him on demand because that is the only safe, healthy means of feeding your child. Every major medical organization says it. Your gut says it.
How would you cope if someone put you on an enforced feeding schedule? What if they arbitrarily decided you could eat only when they thought it was time? Now imagine you couldn't even express your hunger in words and were helpless to even find your own source of food. Now imagine all of that coupled with the feeling of being abandoned by your only source of comfort. That's what a scheduled feeding is to a baby.
Thank you! I'm tearing up just reading this. I may print this out and hand it to anyone who harasses me with unsolicited advice about how often I feed him! I may even copy it in an email to my mom.
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So I'm generally the plan-it-all-out-ahead-make-a-schedule type of person. Thus, when my various real life friends & mom told me all about getting my baby on a schedule and feeding him every 2.5 to 3 hrs, this sounded reasonable. However, I have a 4-week-old little boy who doesn't agree. He wants to eat much more randomly than that. Usually it's every 30 minutes to an hour, but he has slept for up to 3 hrs a few times. I've read Preparation for Parenting by the Ezzos (yes, I know that this is a giant can of worms!) and see a measure of logic in having a routine, but I don't think it is going to work for us at this point. My real life friends mock feeding "on demand," citing people they knew who ended up with fat babies, "always have the baby glued to their boob", think it leads to permissive parenting, etc.
I KNOW he is not hungry every time he roots around, as it is almost constant, even if he's just finished eating for 45 minutes! He is also gaining weight steadily like he's supposed to. I'm sure it's more comfort/sucking satisfaction that he's seeking.
Here are my gut reasons for wanting to feed him "on demand":
1. I know there are days when I'm randomly hungrier than usual, and I listen to my stomach, not the clock. Why should he be any different?
2. Neither of us is sleeping well anyway when I space out his feedings longer than he wants. At least if I'm feeding him when he wants he will be happy and not screaming (and thus I won't be crying!)
3. I don't think we're bonding well currently, as he seems to think the only thing I'm good for is eating, and he acts like I'm torturing him when I don't feed him immediately. He will calm down if dh or another relative holds him, but is constanly rooting and/or screaming when I hold him. I wonder if he will calm down/tolerate me more if he can always count on being fed when he wants to eat!
4. He's only 4 weeks old and has not read the books written by the "experts." It's not possible to "spoil" him when all he wants is to be loved and held and feel secure that his needs are being met.
5. We're both happiest when he's eating!
Basically, I'd like to hear from those who've been there, done that. I could use support/encouragement/advice from those who feed "on demand", but I'm open to debate/differing opinions as well. PLEASE DON'T TURN THIS INTO AN EZZO BASHING/PRAISING THREAD. I really need some help! I'm dissolving into tears at least twice a day right now. What good reasons are there to feed or not feed him on his self-determined time table?
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It does look like a red derby, doesn't it?
Keaton had his 2nd check up and is doing great. He's 8 lbs, 14 oz now (7 lbs, 9.6 at birth) and has grown 1/2 inch in both height and head circumference. Now if only he would sleep for more than 30 min. at a time (and somewhere other than someone's arms or his carseat!)
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I thought you might enjoy these photos from my nieces' yard (Alaska, of course).
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And if it doesn't happen then, it happens in that hour after they are supposed to have gone to bed.
While we eat at the same time as one another for meals, we actually don't eat meals together very often - we spend nearly every other minute of the day together, so meals include reading a book or watching the news or a movie (okay, so the movie would be together meal time, I guess ;)). I think the eat as a family rule comes from mom and dad working all day and kids in school and activities all the time so they can all catch up at the end of the day?
When I was a teen, all important conversations took place after 11 pm while sitting on my parents' bed. Fortunately, they were wise enough to let this take place!
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9 days old
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for those who are interested, here's the crazy-fast timeline of my first labor! I was evidently in early labor all day. I felt some contractions, but there was absolutely no pain, so I figured they were still just Braxton-Hicks. I went to bed at 10:30 pm, then:
12:10 Water broke
12:15 Woke husband & called hospital
12:32 Left home
12:41 Checked in at hospital
12:45 Dilated to 4 cm
3:17 Epidural in
3:30 Fully dilated
3:45 “Practice pushingâ€
4:00 Waited for Dr. so nurse didn't have to deliver
4:25 Dr. arrived
4:42 Keaton arrived!
Dh is an engineer, and keeps a little notebook in his cargo pockets, so he kept this detailed record for me!:D
I was amazed at how well the whole birthing went. Had I known how quickly he would come, I'm sure I could have done without the epidural. A few hours after the epidural wore off, I was saying, "I could do this again!"
I was discharged after 24 hrs., but Keaton had an unspecified infection that required nearly 7 days in the hospital to clear up. Fortunately, he was completely symptomless and happy throughout. Getting his temperature checked in his armpit was more traumatic for him than being stuck with needles repeatedly for IVs and blood tests! Living in a small town has its perks, such as getting to stay in the hospital free with Keaton! We stayed in our same rooming-in room, they still brought me linens, food, etc. The only differences were I was free to come and go from the hospital, and our sleep was interuppted half as much, as they didn't have to check my vitals anymore.
We've been home for almost 7 days now, and things are going well. He is a vigorous eater and nearly drove me crazy with his 24 hr. sucking urge at first. However, I'm now over the soreness, he will take a "Soothie" pacifier, and his sucking need is not as constant. Now if we can only convince him that he should sleep for more than 1 hr. at a time at night!
Dh was given an extra 80 hrs. of free leave to deal with the complications, so he's home now and is an awesome help. Probably the best thing he did was take me to get decaf Starbucks and and a haircut when I had a meltdown. I had very long hair, which he loves and I keep long for him, but he didn't bat an eye when I told him I wanted to cut it to shoulder length.
My mom was kept in the hospital overnight, but is doing great. Basically it was exhaustion and low blood sugar that caused her collapse. The doctors were worried about elevated numbers that could indicate a blood clot, but it turns out her recent liver biopsy caused that reading. She's been sewing up a storm for me--currently she's working on the crib skirt, as I never learned to gather so I left it for her.
Thank you all for your thoughts and prayers!
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The Sugar Creek Gang is a Christian mystery series akin to the Hardy Boys.
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Oh he is beautiful! Congrats. Now let the homeschooling begin! (you can wait a few days if you need to ;) )
While the nurses were cleaning him and determining his Apgar score, Daddy was telling him about dinosaurs and how wonderful it is to eat cheese, so he's got a start on his education already. I think the days we spent in the hospital count as his first unit study, too.
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Embassy Academy's first student has arrived! And what a cute one! :)
Four hours of labor for #1?! I'm on that with #6...
Yeah, I received lots of advice to get the the hospital IMMEDIATELY next time I go into labor, unless Daddy wants to learn how to deliver!
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When we drove past the local grassy airstrip this afternoon, my boys were talking about who wants to be a pilot when they grow up (ME!), and my 4yo dd said that she wants to be an "autopilot" when she grows up. We all had a good laugh, and then explained it to poor bewildered dd. There's so much to know!
We still tease my sister about expressing her desire to be a "beauty parlor" at age 6!
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Details to follow--it has been a crazy week, including:
1. Incredibly short labor (approximately 4 hrs!)
2. Six days in the hospital because Keaton had an infection and had to have IV antibiotics (now home and doing wonderfully)
3. My mom passed out today and was taken to the hospital by ambulance (probably just due to exhaustion and low blood sugar, but there are some concerns to still rule out and she is spending the night)
4. My dad arrives tonight from Idaho. (I bought him a same-day ticket so he could be here)
We would love your prayers.
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It's only "his" money because you provide all his physical needs for him. My parents required my sister and me to save a percentage of "our" earnings (though I wanted to anyway) as preparation for adulthood. This could solve part of the problem. I would present this as a separate issue and not make the connection to the phone with him, though.
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I still have a 10-year-old piece of graphite in my right palm from the first day of 12th grade! Soaking sounds like a good idea.
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Where's the "no, but that's only because my eldest is only 2" category?
:)
Rosie
Yeah! Where's the "No, but I'm going to once I actually HAVE a kid!":D I've planned to homeschool since age 19, but at 27 I'm still working on getting the first bun out of the oven.
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Well, college students may know the difference but unless girls are taught at a young age that they can make it in the sciences, through events like the conference referenced in this thread, they don't have the OPTION of getting into engineering at the college level.
I guess I wonder why people think modern girls supposedly don't know they can have math and science careers. Is discouraging girls from excelling at math and science actually widespread? My mom (born in 1954) was directly and repeatedly told that "girls can't do higher math." I (born in 1981), however, never questioned that I could do whatever I set my mind to, and maybe even be the best at it! Didn't all those years of stupid self-esteem classes that we groaned through in PS work?:lol:
Isn't it possible that most girls don't pursue careers in math and science at the same rate as boys because they just aren't as interested, not because they believe they can't?
Based on my experiences working in the Mechanical Engineering Department at a university, I would suggest that events like this be created/advertised/open to girls AND boys. I think both boys and girls need exposure to engineering so they will know what it really is and is not. A lot of academically unprepared freshman guys picked engineering as a default major and really had NO idea what it entailed. I did a lot of referring to the local jr. college for auto repair courses. Only about 33-40% of our incoming freshmen were actually prepared for the non-remedial curriculum, which begins with Calculus I.
Son dissing homeschooling--how to listen for truth when I'm defensive
in General Education Discussion Board
Posted
Here's another vote for having only one friend being fine. Though I'm quite extroverted in social situations and can get along with lots of people, I don't really connect with many people on a deeper level, so I never really consider them friends in a true sense. I've always been a one-best-friend kind of girl. Though I attended both Christian and public school, I only ever had one good friend at a time. I chatted with peers at church and school, but never was invited to do stuff outside of school or church because we had different values/priorities. I always found one girl with whom I was a "kindred spirit" and we were inseparable. Unfortunately, my best friend moved away when I was a freshman, so I spent high school without even one close friend who lived locally. You know what? I was perfectly "normal" and happy anyway. I was briefly lonely at times, but in the long run I think it was a good thing. I managed to completely avoid the whole teenage angst/rebellion thing that most people take for granted. I partially credit not having a large group of drama-laden teenage girlfriends for this. I mean, I never even had a girl do the whole "I'm not talking to you because I'm mad!" thing to me until college!:D