SproutMamaK
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Posts posted by SproutMamaK
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It is the responsibility of police to enforce the law. They are not psychiatrists. They are not medics. They are are not snipers. (Well some might be, but most are not.) They are not social workers. They are law enforcement.
It is the responsibility of every citizen to obey the law and not disturb the peace. If a group of people cannot do that, they have an obligation to approach law enforcement about how to work together.
What laws are they enforcing? The law to not walk down the street with a toy truck? The law to not mutter to one's self, or rock back and forth? In the diabetic's case, the law to not be disoriented? In Castile's case, the law to not reach for ID? In Sterling's case, the law to not twitch when being tased? In Crawford's case, the law to not buy a toy gun at a WalMart?
These people aren't disobeying the laws or disturbing the peace. They have no need for law enforcement. They're going about their everyday lives and getting shot anyway.
The ironic thing about saying that it is their responsibility to approach law enforcement about how to work together so that this does not happen is that this is exactly what BLM is doing. Generally speaking, LEOs and police unions seem to hate them even more for it.
I actually agree with you, consideration should be given to the scenarios that may have made this happen. The problem is that such considerations are normally given with the perspective of excusing the officer involved. If we can look at the scenario, figure out what happened, and learn from it so that it doesn't happen again, everyone is better off. But when you also say "They are not psychiatrists," it doesn't seem as if the rationale behind the conversation would be to better prepare the cops to deal with mentally ill/disabled people. It seems as though it is to excuse them from needing to be well-prepared to do so.
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Not often in the people I see on a day to day basis, but I know the older generation of my extended family holds some very anti-Muslim views, which in their minds is the same as anti-Arab. Because, as many others have said, to them Muslim = Arab and vice versa. I've "discussed" it with my parents numerous times to the point of damaging our relationship, so at this point it's become an issue that we all ignore with the recognition that no one is actually open to changing their minds on it.
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Ugh, I'm so sorry Aimee. Not to just ignore the current situation with FIL, but what's the long-term treatment for an ulcer in your cornea? Will the drops make them slowly shrink? Is there anything beyond drops that they can do?
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Ugh, so he didn't want to kill the therapist, he wanted to kill the autistic man with a toy truck. Because before shooting someone, while being told "all he has is a toy truck" repeatedly by the therapist, he couldn't be bothered to actually check if the man was holding a gun. And because the poor man seemed to be getting more and more upset. Huh, wonder why that could have been. And he was such a poor shot that he hit the wrong person... and if he hadn't, how many people would have justified the shooting as reasonable?
This whole situation is so many degrees of messed up. It shows just how desperately better training is needed. It's disturbing that people who are this poorly trained are in positions of authority with guns in their hands.-
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Just to get ahead of the inevitable...
"We don't have video of the actual shooting, you don't really know WHAT happened."
Yes, you're right, I'm sure the guy lying on the ground with his hands up, trying to convince his patient to do the same, suddenly decided to jump up and pull a gun on the police.
"All we have is his word for it that this is what happened."
Well, that and the bullet wound, and the video, but maybe those things were just made up.
"Cops have a very difficult and scary job."
Yep.
"I'll wait for the official police video and statement before jumping to conclusions."
It's a good thing police departments have never lied, spun things, or had video go missing before! If THAT had happened a lot, people might start believing objective third party video instead (or even *gasp* the word of criminals like behavioural therapists and school employees)."I heard he was once caught jay-walking, AND that he had an unpaid parking ticket!"
I'm sure the police on the scene who didn't know his name, his occupation, or what he was doing there had full access to the information on everything he's ever done wrong in his life and made the rationed, reasonable decision that he was a threat to their lives based on his terrifying history of parking violations or other such capital crimes.-
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Side note: my spell check on my browser says the word is spelled deescalation, but it looks wrong to me. Can anyone confirm?
There's supposed to be a hyphen. de-escalation
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And after they shot him... they turned him over, face down into the pavement, and handcuffed him. :huh:
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:grouphug: Hope your drive goes smoothly today. Having a full day drive only to have to face such a grim reality at the end of it must be very daunting, and I'm sorry you're facing this day. :(
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My DH doesn't have this problem, but my children sure do, no matter how much I explain it to them.
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Oh no, that's horrible. I'm so sorry Scarlet.
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My secret: hard boil some eggs. Chop the egg whites and incorporate them in to the pasta salad. Take the yolkd and beat them with some mayo and a hint of mustard and dill (and vinegar), or basically however you like your deviled eggs. Add that to your usual pasta salad dressing. It makes it SUPER rich and creamy, and seems less prone to drying out.
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I prefer a 2 piece suit for the bathroom issue, but I wear a tankini because I'm, to be completely frank, ashamed of my body and want to hide it as much as possible. I would love to have the courage to wear a bikini, because tankinis are obnoxious. The extra fabric goes billowing up around my back when I do much of anything in a pool, I get huge air pockets under the tank portion that I have to constantly deflate, etc. Plus I'd love to have a tan stomach to match my tan arms and legs. But as it is, I just don't feel comfortable doing so. A bikini seems like the perfect choice, if only I wouldn't feel like I was shining a spotlight on how hideous my body is if I were to wear one.
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This is so horrible. Those poor families. It's a living nightmare.
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I'm so sorry, Aimee.
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So glad that you kept pushing for answers! I hope the doctors are able to treat him effectively and that he can make a thorough, quick recovery.
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I'm also concerned about the coup in Turkey. Erdogan is now going to lock things down even more for the people. I'm not sure how that's possible, but I'm sure that's he'll find a way. How long with the people and press be able to say ANYTHING negative about him? I agree with the concern that this may all but cement him as a dictator.
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A lot of businesses in my area are doing some fun marketing things to take advantage of Pokémon Go popularity. A local bar and restaurant has advertised a Pikachu drink, not sure what's in it. Places are offering a free charging station and advertising that they have lures.
Seriously, this is a fantastic plan, especially for a business lucky enough to be near a Pokestop. Free charging stations and keep lures going, maybe a "pokemon of the day" where people get a small percentage off their bill if they've caught a certain Pokemon or something. There are so many awesome marketing opportunities right now for retailers and restaurants.
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And it's a gateway drug to Magic: The Gathering, which must be a million times worse.
Then they move on to World of Warcraft, and before you know it the little heathens are out there LARPing in a battle against a dragon.
#ForTheHorde
:leaving:
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I really, really tried to ignore this thread b/c I knew some of the responses would be nasty. I failed.
SproutMama, "it's not working out"? Have you never felt the things the OP is now writing (and probably in a state of heightened stress)? You don't know her, and presumably none of us here do. Let's try to give advice without coming to definitive conclusions about whether her home situation is "working out" or not. That's her job, not yours.
OP, I was in tears today for this very situation with my 9 year old, who steals special treats she knows are for special occasions (she has plenty of unfettered access to healthy snacks and even some not-so-healthy). 5 hours later, I'm feeling better and have new resolve to make this a teachable moment. No advice here, and no judgment either. Praying that you find peace today.
I'm not trying to be nasty. Believe it or not, I'm trying to be supportive of her needs, which is not the same as saying everything will be okay. Have I ever felt totally overwhelmed? Absolutely. But not for years on end, and not to that point where I could genuinely say I could ship a kid off to boarding school and be happy about it. There's no judgment here or feeling "better than", just a recognition that to get to that stage of being consistently and completely overwhelmed means that what you are doing at the time isn't working and something needs to change. I've never felt that way because I don't have to deal with the ongoing issues she does, not because I'm somehow better. I admire the heck out of her for trying so hard for so long, even at great cost to her own personal well-being. But there comes a point when doing that is not alone unhealthy a mother, but unhealthy for their children. There is nothing nasty about saying that it's time to recognize when you're in over your head and do something different. That is healthy, and by calling it "nasty" you're only stigmatizing it more for people who feel like needing to change courses means they've failed.
OP, you are not a failure and not a bad mother. You are overworked, overwhelmed, and (from what I can see on the thread from this winter) very alone. It's okay to say "this isn't working." It's okay to change how you do things. It's okay to need help, and to stick up for yourself until you get it.
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The reality is that I'm a crappy mother and the management needs of these children greatly exceed my capacity to manage them. I have some health problems and trying to do anything that requires divided attention...which is parenting all day long...is really hard. I also have some sensory issues and dealing with constant noise and movement is very stressful. I have read at least 50 books on parenting over the last 6 or 7 years. I have tried so many different things and I can't make anything work. I feel completely overwhelmed pretty much all day every day and have for years. I don't even know what I'm supposed to be doing anymore or what limits I'm supposed to be setting or what consequences I'm supposed to be imposing. It doesn't really matter because nothing helps anyway.
I did ask DH to change the combo on the gun safe.
OP, are you still homeschooling? If so, you need to enroll the kids in school asap. Homeschooling is great, when it works out... but it's not working out. Right now you need to focus on yourself. Aside from that, however much we may malign them, school support workers often have a lot of experience with issues like these and ideas for how to deal with them that may be beneficial to you. Either way, you need to not be dealing with this 24/7.
You need counselling for yourself, even if you can't find family counselling for everyone. You are overwhelmed and it sounds like you're just shutting down, emotionally, physically, and mentally. YOU. NEED. HELP. You need help around the house, you need help with the kids, you need help with yourself. Trying to do everything on your own isn't feasible right now, and it's not going to get better when another baby is added to the mix.
And don't just change the combo on the safe. Get rid of the guns for now. Seriously. Your children have already shown you that they'll figure out the combination to the safe, and this time you only found out because they slipped up and told you. Next time around, they'll figure out the combo and you won't know until it's too late. A child with ODD who is willing to put in the work to figure out a combo to a *gun safe* is a tragedy waiting to happen. Please, if you listen to nothing else anyone has said here, get rid of the guns. Right away. Like, this minute, because if you haven't changed the code yet, your son only needs the time to try out the last 9 digits that could complete the code and he'll be holding a gun in your house.
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I downloaded the game to try it out. It is so glitchy. On our normal 3 mile walk in the neighborhood I found about 20 pokemon but was only able to collect 4. I had to keep restarting the game. There's no way that my kids will have the patience for that. Also, this game is a total battery hog!
I had the same problem on my phone, but on DH's phone it's fine. I think to run properly, you need a top-of-the-line cell. :/ Are there minimum requirement listed anywhere? I'm upgrading my phone soon, might as well get something that the kids can play Pokemon on.
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I believe there will be a lot of accidents involving people playing this game, and I believe a lot of people playing this game will be victims of violent crimes. Much safer to play games Online. Here's a link that illustrates some of the things that have already happened:
I'm sure you're right on both counts. There are already lots of people getting distracted and not paying attention to their surroundings who end up getting hurt. As for violent crime, I expect that will spike short-term at this point when the game has first come out and is really "hot", and then fizzle out as the crowds thin. Online games certainly are safer. Safer isn't necessarily better, though. Sitting at home alone on a computer is certainly less risky than actually walking around a busy neighbourhood and interacting in public places with other people who have similar interests. One of those things sounds more worthwhile though. After all, it's a dangerous business, going out your door. You step on to the road, and if you don't keep your feet, there's no knowing where you might be swept off to.
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Today I saw an article on a couple of guys who managed to fall off a cliff playing this game:
And of course there are warnings floating around that the game invokes demons in churches.
My jaw dropped when I read about there being a poke-stop at a rehabilitation center for child sex offenders. Oh my word.
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750K, give or take.
ETA: somehow I skimmed right over the "nice inside" part. Most of the house that size with that space in our area are century home in need of restoration. The ones that are actually in good repair and well kept sell for significantly more (I just don't pay attention to them because DH and I are handy and prefer the cheaper fixer uppers, lol). For a NICE one... 1 million. A lot of that cost is in the land. You can get McMansions of that size on postage stamp lots in the subrubs for about 450-500K.
Lies People Told Me
in The Chat Board
Posted
If you're willing to work hard and put in the time, you have no reason to worry about having enough money to make ends meet.
God will never give you more than you can handle. (HAHAHAHAHANO)
What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.
Don't focus so much on bookwork when they're so little, spend most of your time playing with them and enjoying them. When they're older they'll be able to catch up in no time.