[s/o - parents not trained to have routines in our culture?]

As a child, I was trained to help clean the house, to pick up my toys, to clean my room etc. I was not taught to cook though. My mother didn't think it necessary. She also did not teach me some other viable skills like preserving food and sewing as she thought I would not need them. She thought I would learn that once I was married as she did.

 

But now as a wife and mother for some time, I have reflected back on my childhood and what I have had to learn on my own. Besides, being trained to clean house, the one thing that really impacted my life was watching my mother work. She was a master at organization and doing 100 things all at once. She was involved in many church activities because she had to (she was a pastor's wife) and we were not rich so she had to make our clothes (first 5 years of my life) and grow our own food and preserve it, keep food ready for drop in guests (on a dily and weekly basis), keep our home and yard clean etc.. Just by her example, I learned how to organize my time and work hard. I would see her make lists and schedules and plan her activities on paper. She would read when she needed to learn something. I would see her plan for all the activities in the church. She still amazes me in all that she can do. So by her example, I learned so much. I am realizing that much is caught over taught when you are child.

 

Now having said that, I do believe it is the responsibility of the parents to show your child how to do something. Just as we show a child how to ride a bike, or how to read, we must make a purpose to show a child how to clean, organize, make schedules, and so on. It takes a whole lot of work and patience on our part as parents as training a child can be a long and frustrating experience before we see actual fruit demonstrated that they have learned the skill we intend for them to learn.

 

Furthermore, if we do not start to teach children from when they are one years old to work, then it is a much more difficult thing to teach a child when they are older, for they have developed bad habits and bad attitudes towards these things.

 

As for our culture, our society has changed quite alot over the last 50 years from a work together attitude to a instant gratification attitude. And we have lost the mentorship roles we as parents use to have. Another thing is our family values and roles and priorities have changed which has caused this shift. I am sure there are more reasons, but you get the idea.

 

Charmayne

[How do you find time to do it all?]

Hello again,

 

I am so glad I posted this thread. I found all your answers so encouraging. It was really encouraging to know that there are others who are not involved in support groups or much activity outside of the home. You all have helped me to keep my eye on what is important and manageable. I don't feel guilty for not having my children in alot of "outside" activities. Because of your responses, I know I am doing what is right for our family. It is good to have objective eyes look at your situation and give you feedback.

 

I had an interesting evening at supper after I put this post up. I casually asked my two oldest ds what they would like to change or improve on in our home education. And they immediately had ideas. But then I was able to discuss things like their poor attitudes in regards to certain subjects or wanting to play instead of do homeschooling, etc. They were really open and willing to find solutions to improve our homeschooling. I also was able to discuss their responsibility in their learning and chores etc. My two ds due to our discussion are presently writing out their ideas in how they would like our learning to improve and how to help them become more responsible. I see growth tonight in both of my sons. It is bittersweet for me to see they are growing from little children into responsible men (thankfully slowly!)

 

Continue to write ideas and comments. I would love to learn more.

 

Charmayne

[How do you find time to do it all?]

Hello everyone. This is my first post. I have been checking out the boards for some time to learn from you all and I would like to have your advice on the following.

 

How do you find the time to do it all and still have fun learning and yet have a life? Being in support groups, sports activities, going on field trips, manage the home, work, pursuing your own interests and still stay on schedule with homeschooling.

 

I have 4 wonderful children: ds10, ds 7, ds 3, and a dd1 . I have been enjoying our homeschooling experience for the past 4 years and will be starting my 5th year soon. I follow the WTM book about 85% to 90% which is good for me. My husband and I are very pleased that we are giving our children a classical/liberal arts education.

 

Where I struggle is how to do it all?

 

We only attend church on Sunday, swimming lessons seasonally, french class during the normal ps year once a week and that is it. The evenings and weekends are where we spend time as a family and do things together. Despite being home this much, I am finding that our homeschooling is slowly stretching into an all day activity which I am not too thrilled about as I had a desire to keep it under 4 hours to allow for other creative endeavors and activities. I really want to do a great job in educating my children and really like how the WTM outlines how to do every subject, but I find that if I do all they suggest, then we will be learning all day with no ability to do anything else. My husband desires that our children not fall behind on anything and stay on grade level, so I don't allow too much interest-led learning which can be boring. I am a very organized individual and like to have everything running smoothly. I have trained my oldest two children to help clean our home with me and even started teaching them how to cook.

 

Some things I would like to include are:

1-have a 2 hour break like SWB and JW suggest in their book, but I don't know how to fit it in. 2-have my children in a few activities during the week just for fun and interaction with others, but I don't know how to fit it in.

3-continue having our evenings and weekends free as a family

4- I would like to have time to pursue my own interests, but I don't know where to fit it in. JW said in the WTM book that as a homeschooling mother, I would have to put aside my interests for a long time in order to homeschool well. I am willing to do this as I find I am enjoying learning along with my children and am looking forward to the grade 5 year as I will be doing alot more reading to keep up with my ds and his more independent studies.

5- get everything else done: house cleaning, cooking, laundry, etc

 

What could I drop that is not important in their home education? How much interaction does a child need with friends? How long should a person spend on subjects like Saxon math, grammar, writing, science, history, etc in grade 5? How do you make some of the subjects fun while using the WTM resources and yet not get off of schedule because of interest-led learning or the child takes too long to complete their work? How much independence do I allow my grade 5 child in his home education? Do you have any ideas for my children to do that we could do in our home that would allow for social interaction with others their age and is fun?

 

Thankyou.

Charmayne