Dd 3, "S", has a habit of lying when she thinks she's going to get in trouble. I know, I know, this is probably typical, but I've been trying to explain to her the difference between telling a lie and the truth, etc, and am wondering if three year olds developmentally are able to understand this concept. Based on my experiences just this morning with her, I'm thinking not:
Dd3 is sent to her room to clean up books. DD 1 1/2, "K", follows her and quickly starts crying. I confront DD about what happens, and she says dd 1 1/2 fell. I know this isn't the whole truth because other dd saw her push her. So I ask again:
Mom: "S", what really happened to "K"? Did you push her?
dd: No, she just fell.
Mom: "S", remember what we talked about telling the truth? Remember I said I'll never get mad at you as long as you tell me the truth? Now, how did "K" fall?
dd: She just came in and fell and started crying.
Mom: (insert lying lecture here, i.e., God is always watching and he knows the truth, telling me what really happened means telling me the truth and I'll never get mad, no matter what you did . . . etc, etc., ad nauseum . . . Now, what happened to "K"?
DD: Sigh of defeat, poker face, looks me straight in the face, "D" (ds, 3) pushed her.
Kripes, now she's making up things, not just denying!!!!!!! Arghhhhhhhh!!!!
This happens throughout the day in various scenarios. What do I do? Do I just give her the standard lecture and move on? Is it unrealistic to think she can comprehend what I'm saying? Do I make her sit in her room until she tells me the truth? I'm really stumped here. I don't remember any of the other kids going through this, and it's really starting to bother me.
How have you handled this behavior? I'd really like to nip this now, but I want to be developmentally realistic, too. Any input would be very much appreciated.
thanks so much,
lisa