Yesterday I did 45 mins of running intervals and really felt good. I'm really pleased at how my cardio has improved over the last 6 months or so. I have CKD tonight, so will take it easy this morning. Hopefully I can do some easy CKD pattern and technique work, but my outdoor workout mats might be wet this morning--sometimes rain blows in far enough to reach them and it def rained a lot last night. If they are, I'll do an easy jog. I spent some time reading that Lean Habits book Soror recommended, and, despite being about weight loss, so far I think it will really help me transition over to maintaining weight without tracking. There are 4 core habits and 12 more helpful or advanced habits, and funny enough I have most of the latter down pat but struggle with the core ones. Thanks for the rec, @soror, it was timely! Probably most importantly, I really decompressed yesterday and got great sleep. So happy to start the week off feeling rested and strong! @Monica_in_Switzerland I'm so sorry you're sick! Blah! I hope recovery is quick.

Awesome! I know you wanted something more challenging!

Yeah, I was really suspicious about the number on the scale because I for sure ate more this week. Not sure what that's all about! I had wings and a beer last night, yo. Lol. Regardless, I've been feeling pretty positive about my actual physique recently in terms of body fat and musculature, etc., and I like how I eat overall. I don't feel deprived or anything but I'm for sure a lot more open to eating more to sustain energy and performance than I used to be. I definitely have gone through the "I'm just being lazy and undisciplined if I don't go farther" stuff, but I worked through that and am over it, thankfully! For now, ha. Growing up chubby in the 80s and early 90s doesn't do great things for a girl's overall mentality about weight! But I really, really, really, hate feeling weak, tired, or hungry in the middle of a workout* so I have a ton of motivation to maintain for performance rather than continue to make getting smaller a goal. *This doesn't happen on a regular basis, I just mean when it does happen, I'm like, nope, this ain't worth it. I read an article from Nia Shanks around the new year about how bad it is to constantly keep shifting your weight loss goals back and it resonated with me. The nutrition/health stuff I want to work on now doesn't have anything to do with fat loss, which I think is positive. Maximizing energy levels, getting better at intuitive eating, keeping blood sugar stable (stupid hypoglycemia!). I think maybe I'm a little bit like a cargo ship. It takes me a looooong time to make a turn, if that makes sense! I've been going in one direction for so long. I really appreciate having this space and you ladies to talk through it with, though! Re: the treadmill--truer words were never spoken! Pushups...my power tower has these little handles for pushups and good gravy the extra depth makes them harder. Such a core exercise! I just wish I could find a nice position for my arms to keep my elbows from cracking so painfully. I'm finishing up my current training plan and the next one will swap in floor press and OHP instead. My elbows need a break!

YES! Way to go on the pull-ups! That's awesome! I love to work out lower body. Kettlebell swings have a huge impact on booty for me, highly recommend. Hamstrings, too. So I am giving my scale the side-eye because it's reading nearly 2 lbs lighter this morning. I am torn between wanting to jump up and down seeing that 135.6 and resignedly going to get some batteries, lol. I think my husband changed them recently though. In my mind 135 is a really great weight for me considering my frame and build and I'm happy to maintain here indefinitely. My weight tracker says 129 is my "ideal weight" but I don't know if that's all that feasible with the strength training I do. Also I would have no boobs. Pretty sure that's where the last 2 lbs came from! Usually I rest on Sundays, but the weather is gonna be yucky a lot this week, so I think I will do a session of running intervals. I should practice CKD, but I am having PMS brain fog and that just seems waaay too mentally demanding. Oh well!

I get so restless sitting killing time waiting for kid activities to be done! And parents don't talk to each other, because--like you said--they are on their phones. I'm pretty sure 50% of my motivation for joining the CKD class was not being able to handle all that wasted time, lol.

Weightlifting this morning, which I am very much looking forward to after Friday's rest. I've bumped up my calories slightly and must have hit maintenance level bc my weight has been rock steady for the whole week. Also I have been eating so that my macros are closer to even. Protein still wins out, but it's much more even in general and it seems to be working pretty well. Been getting good sleep, which always helps. I'm def in high hormone phase now, though, blaaaah. Can't I just fast forward until it's over?! Anyways, my dad is home and resting comfortably, next week should be fairly routine, all good stuff. Here's hoping things will start looking up from here on out! So far I have not been overly impressed with 2020, lol.

One of my favorite memories as a kids was seeing snow for the first time in North Carolina--and the icicles hanging from the rocky roadsides!

@Laura Corin YAY! So exciting! @wintermom I was telling my fam about your winter escapades during lunch today--the boys can hardly believe it since they've never even seen so much as a snowflake. Their biggest excitement is when the bird baths freeze over... @SKL You have been so consistent! Don't get down on yourself for missing part of your routine though. The best part about working out most days is that when life occurs and you miss something, you don't have to stress. You're just automatically right back at it next time. @soror my library actually has that book (it's a miracle!) so Imma check it out. I also have a fitness book I'm interested in: Unplugged, by Andy Galpin . I listened to Joe Rogan interviewing him today and I thought he was a really learned, thoughtful, non-reactionary fitness expert. Of course my library doesn't have that one, so I will poke around the interwebs to find the most cost effective means of reading it. ETA: it looks like the book got poor reviews. Maybe I will just recommend the podcast instead.

@Laura Corin I love Vivaldi and I hope you get your house! @soror You are killing the whole sleep thing this week! That's awesome! And your gym workout sounds tough and fun (the best kind). @wintermom We're not really sure what to expect in terms of my dad walking and the other parts of his recovery. I'm assuming the wheelchair and walker will be temporary, but I'm pretty sure he'll never get back to his usual tree-felling, log-splitting, tractor bush-hogging, roof-repairing normal. Apparently the dr is rethinking letting him go so early and he is very angry and agitated about that. But if he falls in the middle of the night, what exactly is my tiny mom supposed to do about it? I don't think he is thinking about that part. They have a lot of property that is about 3/4 wooded with paths, plus several outbuildings and complicated "landscaping" (basically a lot of tropical/rare plants grouped everywhere, lol). It requires a lot of upkeep and I'm pretty nervous about taking over a lot of the stuff he used to do, like bush-hogging the paths with the tractor, etc. This is going to be a tough transition for everybody! Hopefully my parents will be receptive to my suggestions about changes we can make to the property to make upkeep easier but still have the property be enjoyable for everyone since we all love to be outside. Re: spin kicks...there's so much going on in the movement that I often get a third of the way through it, lose my balance, and mentally yell, ABORT ABORT, haha. But every new kick feels impossible for awhile before it clicks. I worked on them hard yesterday until suddenly my outdoor mat just got randomly drenched with dew. I guess it's so warm and humid that the dewpoint came at a weird time? Anyways, too slick for that. I drilled CKD in the morning as planned, ate well all day, but was feeling very spent while working outside in the afternoon. I think the heat got to me. There was a thunderstorm building and the humidity was like breathing through a wet rag. Feeling a lot better after a good supper and a good sleep, but I think I will make today a rest day. There's no class tonight anyways and I want to be well recovered for tomorrow's weight lifting session.

My dad will be coming home from rehab Friday! He's done really well--all his therapists talk about how strong he is and how that has helped with recovery. Speech is still affected and he will come home with a walker and a wheelchair, but he will be stable enough to take care of his needs with some help from my mom. Things won't really ever be the same, but it could have all been much much worse. Anyways, we are all happy for things to settle down to (new) normal. Now that life will be a little more predictable again, I am going to work on spacing out my intense workouts to try and be more consistent about alternating them with lighter sessions. I actually have had a decent couple of weeks fitness-wise, despite all the craziness and stress. I love low hormone phase...I went up in reps on basically all my movements/sets. Unfortunately the high hormone phase goblins are right around the corner, ready to make all my weights heavier and my brain foggier, lol. Last night at CKD, the chief instructor had us doing speed drills in intervals--20 secs of max speed effort, then 40 secs rest, repeat through all the speed drills. I was really pleased to see that my cardio endurance has increased since the last time we did it. I think the combo of more frequent runs, plus doing my strength training as a circuit with kb swings or jump rope in between sets is really working. Today I'm planning on doing CKD technique work (gotta nail those stupid spinning kicks!) and work at my parents' place this afternoon to finish clearing up all the windstorm debris.

Pull-ups are bizarrely psychological. I'm not sure why. I always have to stoke up my confidence and visualize myself doing the reps before I start. But I do remember that once I broke the barrier of the first one, I was able to jump up to 2x3 pretty quickly. Hopefully that will be your experience too! Report back! 🙂

2 ft of counter space?!?! UGH. I bet you can't wait for that to be over! @soror I'm so glad you had such a good week of sleep and fitness! I feel you on how hard it is to balance everything to get good outcomes with sleep and all the rest. Re: carbs...I have 2 pieces of homemade whole wheat bread at breakfast, carbs at lunch come from things like carrots and apple, afternoon snack from a banana, suppertime I either have white or sweet potatoes about half the time, the other half the time rice or a homemade roll or cornbread. So not a ton of non-fruit/veg carbs, but some. @wintermom and @Laura Corin I love hearing about y'all's outdoor adventures in all weathers, especially since I'm such a wimp about the cold! CKD class was pretty fun and strenuous since the chief instructor was there. Spinning kicks made me a little less dizzy this time, so that's good. Today I'm going to see my dad at the stroke rehab place (which means a drive to The Big City), then over to my parents' house in the afternoon. If my mom's to do list isn't too long, I will go running on my old trail in their woods. I'll have to go easy, though--it's supposed to be 83 and sunny today and it always is good to ease back into working out in the heat after a long hiatus. Need to get new running shoes!

@wintermom -20! Yikes! @soror I'm sorry you are having a cruddy day. I hope it turns around for you and you can shed the stress. It was in the upper 60s and sunny here today, so I couldn't help but get outside for a nice run before lunch today. Last lap, I tripped on a root and bit the dust right as my husband happened to be walking nearby. Why do 100% of the goofy things I do happen around him?! LOL. So my whole left side is banged up, but thankfully I did not squash my phone in the pocket on that side. I have been trying to change a few things with my eating...I definitely have had more energy yesterday and today even though I'm not really getting out of a deficit level. I think I am so used to eating stuff that is high volume/low calories that I fill up on that pretty easily. I am very surprised to be having this problem to say the least! I have been looking at my macros in my app and I think maybe it would help to up my carbs more. Average daily carbs are like 25% when maybe they should be closer to 40%. Thoughts anyone? Tomorrow, if I'm not needed by my parents, I'll do something light in the morning (CKD technique drills, maybe) and then CKD class in the evening.

Lifted weights in the afternoon--felt good. I had a little more sleep and a good lunch in the tank and ended up with a satisfying workout. Today will probably be a rest day unless I need to get out and burn off some stress.

That's really neat, @wintermom!

YAY!!!!!!!! Congratulations!!! You have worked so hard for those pull ups! Yay!!!

I'm impressed at you working out in the dark and cold like that! That kind of thing makes me want to hibernate until spring!

Thank you so much, and @Laura Corin too--I needed to hear all this! I mulled it over all day yesterday (while I was cleaning up debris from a ridiculous windstorm that hit the night before) and realized just how much less fun being active is when you're not sure you're going to have the energy to drag yourself through it. And since the mental/emotional aspect is a big motivator for my active lifestyle, that's a problem! Also my blood sugar tanks if I can't eat a meal on time or at the end of a long workout (I can tell because I get panicky and irritable) and that's been happening more often lately. And I KNOW rebound hunger is a thing for me and yet I shove that to the back of my mind. Ugh, I know better! But I love a challenge and challenging myself so I rationalize. I think being smarter about programming the different workouts is something I need to do too, like you said. I actually felt really great right around Thanksgiving and Christmas and I'm sure it had to do with the fact that my workouts were dialed down about a third and my calories were slightly up. @Monica_in_Switzerland that thing you said a few days ago about being well-trained to meet life's challenges--that has been rolling around in my head ever since. Thanks so much for that! I really appreciate all of y'all encouraging me during this tough time!

I guess 3 weeks will be the limit of his rehab stay. They are saying that he could go home sooner since he's otherwise strong and healthy, but I am going to push to make sure his walking is really really stable before he goes home. My mom is like 5'1 and can't be helping him get up. If he were to fall, probably the 2 of us couldn't get him up. He's just a large-framed guy (guess which side of the family I take after lol). It's really really hard to see him affected by stroke. I wish we could know what his new normal will end up being so we can at least prepare for it. Sometimes it seems like he'll be mostly ok, sometimes (like when they brought him a kiddie handwriting sheet to try out) it hits me that maybe not. Re: food and goals... I have been mulling this stuff over a lot and I waffle on what I want or think I need to do. One thing I know for sure is that I need a good template for every day bc I go off the rails big time without boundaries when it comes to eating. I know I don't always have the energy I want...I tend to crash about 35 or 40 mins into a workout. But it's hard to know if that's from not sleeping well enough or not eating enough calories. Re: crash diets...that's so infuriating. That's like recently when my relatives were so interested in what I did to lose weight and get fit--until they realized my way of eating wasn't a "named" diet that excluded food groups or blocks of time. They literally turned away and started looking at their phones mid-sentence. LOL. Good luck everybody with presentations and workout plans and everything else going on! I did some CKD drilling this morning and a short run, but I was NOT feeling it. Disrupted sleep and last night's gin and tonic (another bday present from my mom) to blame I imagine, haha.

Well I have sort of settled into what passes for normal for the next 3ish weeks. I've been visiting my dad in the hospital in the city every other morning and doing upkeep at my parents' house on the other days in the afternoon. He will be moved to a stroke rehab place over the weekend to get him well enough to come home. Been too busy to get quite as much exercise as usual but I have still been lifting and going to CKD when possible. My mom got me a food scale (among other kitchen gadgets) for my birthday, and I've been experimenting a little with it. I've been feeling like my eating wasn't matched to well to my activity, so it will be neat to spend a little time tracking more accurately once I get a few days to do so. Already I can tell I have been underestimating my calories somewhat. When life gets less stressful I will need to tweak things apparently. The Precision Nutrition calculator suggests 2098 calories for body recomp for me, but I have been getting more like 1700 if the stuff I'm learning from the food scale is right. I definitely skimped on protein this week (it's always the first macro to go when life gets busy!) and it has affected my recovery big time! Lots of soreness from both lifting and CKD! Crazy.

My mom is pretty healthy, thankfully! She just thinks she's dumb and gets easily flustered and boxes herself into a lot of "I can't do this" corners. I'm really grateful that sleep has been good for me. He had a good day today and we had a normal afternoon here at home after I got back from the hospital. Morale is much improved from yesterday (which was my birthday--worst one ever!)

Lifting and CKD yesterday (lifting was pretty intense, CKD was more skill than sweat). I am going to try to get in some CKD drill after we are done with lessons this afternoon, more for the stress relief than anything. I'm enjoying y'all's updates!

Hi everybody, I had a few mins of downtime and wanted to stop in for a bit. *Non-fitness stuff, feel free to skip 🙂 * So my dad apparently has been having severe a-fib, which kind of culminated in a huge "episode" Friday night, when my mom called me to come over and I immediately called 911. His wildly swinging heart rate caused numerous small strokes and seizures. He now has a pacemaker and is on blood thinners. His speech is quite slurred and he had a hard time walking today when they got him up to go sit in a chair. They think some of this will improve as his brain comes back online after all that trauma but he will need to go to a short-term stroke rehab facility after being released from the hospital. He is 72, but has been very active and healthy his entire life so this is all quite a shock and in general a huge nightmare. I'm an only child and my mom is not very independent so we are entering uncharted territory here. I just wish I could rewind time back to before all this happened! *Back to mostly fitness stuff* No sleep at all Friday night, but last night was ok and if I do good again tonight I will try to lift in the morning. I think it will help with tension both mentally and physically. Then over to my parents' house to spend the morning putting the house back to normal/cleaning/laundry/pet care, etc. If I am not worn out by then we will go to CKD to try to keep things running normally for the boys. Y'all keep my oldest son in your thoughts and prayers--my dad is his hero!

Hi guys, just wanted to let y'all know I'll be gone for a few days--my dad is in the hospital. My mom and I were in the ER with him all night until he was put into a room in the ICU. It looks like he will recover, but the next few days are going to be really crazy and exhausting with a bunch of trips to the big city to the hospital. Y'all keep gettin' after it and I'll see ya on the flip side!

Yesterday was lifting and CKD class. Lifting was great, CKD was a little disheartening since we sparred and that is my weakest area. Anytime I feel the least bit overwhelmed by someone, I freeze up, frantically trying to think of the "right" thing to do. Bah. However, the chief instructor was there, and he told me that my son and I will have no problem with the black belt test. He said we are 100% prepared (with exception of the brown belt stuff we are working on now) and he has no concerns about us. We'll still get a series of private lessons with him March and April to help us "peak" for it, but his confidence really bolstered my confidence. I'll be drilling CKD this morning and then working hard outside at my parents' this afternoon. I have been slacking on using my upright punching bag lately, so I'm going to make sure I do some time on it 3x a week. Plus I need to work on my spinning kicks. My son can do them peeeeeerrrrfectly which is so annoying so good for him! Lol.