hsmommyx3 Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 I never really post on here but I lurk everyday. My dh struggles with depression & other health issues. For financial reasons after he lost his job, I was forced to put the kids back in ps. I am now working & supporting our family & with my job I could work & homeschool. I am praying that things will turn around for dh soon & he can get back in the workforce soon because my oldest will be starting middle school next fall & I really wanted to homeschool through high school. My dh is on again/off again towards the idea of homeschooling them and I honestly think it's because he wants them gone during the day. He seems irritated by them at times. Their behavior has gone backwards since putting them back in school, which isn't helping things & I think his reactions to it are a bit more extreme because of the depression. Homeschooling might be far off for me but I just know that it's the best thing for our children - especially our oldest ds. I am a Christian & I am trying to be a Godly wife. I just don't know how to handle this situation. I know I am supposed to be submissive and respect what he says - but what he says just depends on the day & his mood. Has anyone encountered this with dh? Please say a prayer for our family. Thank you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wendi Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 My advice, for what it's worth, is to talk to your dh (when he's feeling "good") about your goals (homeschooling, etc.) for the future. What steps can y'all take toward those goals? Dh getting medical help, counseling, whatever y'all decide will take you toward the goal. I know depression is hard to deal with in a family. I'll be praying. Wendi Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WTMindy Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 I never really post on here but I lurk everyday. My dh struggles with depression & other health issues. For financial reasons after he lost his job, I was forced to put the kids back in ps. I am now working & supporting our family & with my job I could work & homeschool. I am praying that things will turn around for dh soon & he can get back in the workforce soon because my oldest will be starting middle school next fall & I really wanted to homeschool through high school. My dh is on again/off again towards the idea of homeschooling them and I honestly think it's because he wants them gone during the day. He seems irritated by them at times. Their behavior has gone backwards since putting them back in school, which isn't helping things & I think his reactions to it are a bit more extreme because of the depression. Homeschooling might be far off for me but I just know that it's the best thing for our children - especially our oldest ds. I am a Christian & I am trying to be a Godly wife. I just don't know how to handle this situation. I know I am supposed to be submissive and respect what he says - but what he says just depends on the day & his mood. Has anyone encountered this with dh? Please say a prayer for our family. Thank you! Oh man, I have no advice for you, but I am saying a prayer for you and your dh right now!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gratefulmother Posted January 5, 2009 Share Posted January 5, 2009 I am so sorry you are in this difficult place right now. It seems like you are really trusting and waiting on the Lord to work on your behalf. I want to encourage you as you try to serve and love your husband as he is struggling. And I guess you could say that one way to do that right now is to have the children in ps, since that is his desire. Until some of the other stressful parts of your lives are resolved, I would ask the Lord to provide good teachers and supply what your children need even though they are not in what you see as the ideal situation (hsing) right now. Praying for your family. And just to encourage you, my best friend growing up grew up in a home where her father was bipolar and depressed most of the time. He also struggled to keep a job because of these issues. Yet, she attended ps, was the top graduate of the program she was in in college, and is now married with 3 children living overseas with her husband as missionaries. So through the prayers of many people, especially her grandparents, and the love and support of a church family, she turned out beautifully. There is a lot to be hopeful about in your situation though it may be a very long road. Keep trusting and waiting for the Lord to provide for you. Learn to look through your circumstance and find your joy and contentment in His love and provision for you. I will be praying! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hsmommyx3 Posted January 5, 2009 Author Share Posted January 5, 2009 Thank you for the kind words and prayers. I know in my heart that homeschooling my oldest ds, who is very much like my dh, is better for him than to stay in ps. My ds is 10 and he wants so badly to fit in that he conforms to whomever he surrounds himself with. I think to provide him with a strong, loving and Christian foundation would help him to be successful later in life. My husband "gets" it for the most part but the depression has a way of changing his perspective. Wendi, thank you so much for the prayers. I do talk with him when he is well and at those times he is pretty much in agreement. It's keeping him well that's so frustrating. Hopefully his doctors can figure something out soon. Mindy, I really appreciate your prayers. It is so comforting to know that others are praying for your family. Gratefulmother, Thanks for your encouraging words. I know that God has a plan and that He will make sure that we are protected and loved. I have faith in God and that is what has kept me going this long. Unfortunately, it sometimes feels like all his medical ailments and his severe depression is an attack from Satan. I hope that doesn't offend anyone, but when you are trying to dig out of the depths of depression, especially when the leader of your family is the one afflicted, it feels like you dig just to sink futher. It can really feel like Satan is playing with your mind. Not to mention, when I see all of the similiarities between dh & ds, I just know that he will go so much further in life if he focuses on getting his education & learning to love himself, rather than to waste his time at ps worrying about what others think of him & trying to fit in. He's by no means a "nerd" or "anti-social" but he takes on the personality of those he is around easier than most & lately he has found the bad apples, which is worrysome. God Bless! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Claire in NM Posted January 6, 2009 Share Posted January 6, 2009 Bless your heart, Jennifer. I can't even come close to imagining what your family is going through. But I know that God is good and God is faithful. And I also know that you know that God is good and He is faithful. God has a plan for you, a plan that will not bring you harm or destroy you, but His plan will give you hope and a future (Jer 29:11). Jennifer, God is so pleased with your faithfulness to Him and your dH and God knows that your heart is so burdened for your dh and your children. Right now, I am lifting you up in prayer and thanking God for your example of obedience to Him. We love you and we are praying for you. In Jesus' name, Amen. Claire in NM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SonshineLearner Posted January 6, 2009 Share Posted January 6, 2009 Sorry for you as you go through this time.....Praying that you'll be able to homeschool just as soon as possible, and that your husband will have lifted spirits soon. Carrie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MBH Posted January 6, 2009 Share Posted January 6, 2009 I am praying for you. Please keep us updated and as you already know very well: The Lord is in complete control, He knows what He is doing. He will bring to completion the good work He has begun in your family. His ways are mysterious, but He is faithful. He is going to reward your faithfulness. Thank you for posting because many, many people will lift you up in prayer. :grouphug: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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