Book for figuring out where ones interest lie with regard to career choices...

[Guest Mom2fab5]

 

Hi ladies...this is actually Clara in Miami...I changed my name when the board changed over but I think I wish I hadn't becuase I feel the need to have to introduce myself when ever I post ( gee now that I wrote that it seems rather pathological...must be the fruit of the modern world of internet communication :001_smile: (

 

anyhow......

 

I haven't been here for some time..rather depressed about not being able to get things done with the children and I couldn't bear to read about home ed

 

I spoke to a dear mom the other day...

 

she is very concerned about her son.

 

She had wanted to home educate him when he was younger but was afraid she couldn't ..he had some issues and ended up on Ritalin..he was taken off when he was 14...now he is 19 and very unmotivated. He started CC last year but didn't do so well and just is generally uninterested...the mom was thinking of having him go to a career counsellor..I thought you ladies might have input

 

1. Book suggestion ..something like a book called What Color is your parachute

 

2. general advice to share with a gracious and godly family...they are at a loss as to how to deal with his lack of motivation on a daily basis..he says he has been filling out job applications but they don't know for sure

 

he is the oldest of 2 children

 

thanks so much

blessings to all

Clara in Miami aka Mom2fab5

[Michelle in MO]

my head: What Color is Your Parachute? I gave you the link to the entire page of associated products, because it looks like there's also a workbook.

 

I would also recommend this book by Mel Levin, entitled Ready or Not, Here Life Comes!. It's written more towards the parents, enabling them to help their children find their gifts and talents and pursuing them. I guess you could say it's all about successfully "launching" your kids into adulthood. I read it, and it's really quite good.

[Pamela H in Texas]

And if it helps, things change a LOT for many kids in the young adult years. LOTS of 19yos are unmotivated, not doing well, etc. And yet then about 22 or 25, they seem to be heading the right direction (though boys seem to take til 30s to "grow up" and my mom promises me it gets even better by 50 but is never really the same :) ).

 

One thing is that parents need to not enable undesirable behaviors and traits. A 19yo either needs to be in school or working full time (or in full time ministry or other volunteer work). They can't just mooch off mom. Mom needs to be careful not to feel overly guilty about how things went either. We set the stage for our kids to some extent but teens and young adults have A LOT of ability to make their lives whatever they wish. She just needs to be supportive of his good choices, not enable the poor ones, and know that MOST grow up just fine sometime in their 20s :)

 

It is possible he also feels incapable if school and life otherwise have been less than ideal. A mentor, someone respectable, ideally who might have felt similarly at some point, may really help. For example, one day, my son answered during a Q&A portion of a congregation meeting. He stumbled something awful (as he often does when reading and/or public speaking unless he's practiced 1400 times). After the meeting, a well-to-do, very spiritual man talked to him. See, this same man has dyslexia so badly that when he's conducting the meeting but there are letters to be read, he has to have someone else come up and read them. We also have a couple other people in our congregation with speech impediments (mild mostly; one severe from a stroke). My son sees how they fair in life and in the congregation despite similar difficulties to his.

 

Not sure this was much help. There was an online career profile I can see if I can ask my daughter if she can help me find. It was RIGHT on for her but was detailed enough to show us how right on so we could be more accepting of certain aspects as well as celebratory of others.

[Rhondabee]

Going to see a career counsellor was one of the most self-affirming experiences I've ever had. Even though I got PG and didn't follow her advice - I would *highly* recommend going. I think I took about 3 different tests before meeting with her privately, and she was just so positive and uplifting.

 

I guess a lot depends on the counsellor, obviously. But, if you have a good one in your area, I think *that* would be better than any book.

 

=)

Rhonda

[Guest Mom2fab5]

If there are anymore insights feel free to continue sharing them :001_smile:

 

thanks!!!

Blessings to all

Clara in Miami

[ilovebooks2]

Hello!

 

I was on the old boards too--changed my name to go with one I already used in other places ;-) Have you done much with personality types? You know the Briggs/Meyers tests? I don't agree with everything about their teachings but I do think it is a great starting point. We had to take abbrieviated versions of the test for a church exercise--our paster did it as an exercise on what gifts to do we have, etc.--and I really loved learning about all of it.

 

Anyway, God really used it to give me some insight into myself and why I have certain tendencies--for example I learned I am definitely an introvert although most people think I am an extrovert--etc.

 

Well, there is several books out there based on the Meyers/Briggs test that help you determine, based on your personality type, what jobs or careers are most suited for you. You could check one out of the library. One of them is called DO WHAT YOU ARE by Paul and Barbara Tieger. It's very easy to read.

 

You can take the tests online (an abbrieviated version) for free or pay to have the complete test. I found another book though, for my daughter that made me fairly sure of what type she was without having to have her take an indepth test. It's another book by the Tiegers called NURTURE BY NATURE. Again, I don't subscribe to everything they talk about but it was facinating to see the breakdowns of type per each type of child. This book is very good for determining children's types from toddler to teen.

 

 

Sorry this was such a long post but I hope it's just another avenue for you!

 

Candice

[Pamela H in Texas]

The site I mentioned was http://www.livecareer.com They have a free report. You can also upgrade to a more detailed one.