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Please Help Character Training and Siblings always fighting.


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The book "How to Stop Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes in You and Your Children" by Turansky and Miller is excellent for this. The book is all about *honor* in family relationships.

 

I can also share that when my family gets like you describe, I need to look at:

 

1. Screen time (adults and kids)

2. Routine (we've typically let it slide)

3. Adult depression (which causes numbers 1 & 2)

4. Preponderance of junk food/lack of quality food

5. Not enough healthy large motor play/outdoor time

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Siblings Without Rivalry is a pretty quick read. It's main message is teaching everyone in the family how to validate the feelings of other family members. It also goes into the pitfalls of labeling our dc (the smart one, the funny one) and cautions against treating our dc according to their birth order. It gave me a lot of insight regarding how I was, without realizing, causing animosity between my dc. I even had my dh read it and it gave him many, many aha moments regarding his own childhood and how, through his mother's treatment of "the oldest" and "the baby", he and his siblings have had a pretty bad relationship with each other.

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Thank you both! I am going to change some routines and try to help. We are moving and the boys are going to have to share a room and I think somedays they have had to much of each other they can't take it! We have started letting them share a room since Jackson has a bunk bed I will see if I can find the book at the library.

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