zaichiki
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Posts posted by zaichiki
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It was the "type of people" remark specifically... you can't put people in boxes like that, y'know? There isn't any sort of "type" of person who works as a cashier. There are young people, old people, shy people, outgoing people, wealthy people, low income people, people who have been to university and earned a bazillion degrees, people who never got past the end of elementary school...the list goes on...
Whatever. I actually worked as a cashier once (meaning a time ago, not one time only). If I was putting people in boxes, I'd be doing it to myself... so... not my intention. Perhaps I didn't express myself clearly enough...
The type of cashier who would make a comment about someone going for a colonoscopy, or their feminine products, ... well... I would just try to assume that they were the type who wouldn't realize that was inappropriate. This sort of cashier seems to be rather common where I live.
Although... I went to a Whole Foods in another town and was quite impressed with the cashiers there. They were polite and well-spoken... Too bad I can't afford to shop there more often.
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One of our homeschool groups goes once or twice a year to do a concert in a nursing home activity room. At Christmas the kids bring handmade cards to give out to the audience after the concert. Giving out the cards gives the kids an opportunity for a brief personal interaction with several residents. (That's meaningful when you consider we usually have about 20 kids and each one will make and give three cards.)
The residents (many with Alzheimers) seem to really enjoy just watching the kids... and they LOVE getting a kid-made Christmas card.
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*blink*
I can't believe I just read that. Good grief. :lol:
Good grief indeed!
Do you think that cashiers' comments (personal opinions on what you buy) some have complained about here are appropriate? Don't you think that, instead of being offended by the commments, we should try to be understanding that the TYPE of people that make them may not understand that they are inappropriate? And, BTW, (thanks to the limit of my posted communication) my comment about feeling sorry for them was 100% connected to what I wrote in parentheses: that their job is likely boring and they could just be trying to strike up conversation to keep from being bored.
I can tell now that most people did not connect my "feel sorry for them" comment with what I wrote in the parentheses. Also, I should have been very specific that I wasn't refering to ALL cashiers, but only the "type" that make socially inappropriate comments to strangers.
Nuff said.
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Do you honestly think that most people who (as an example) work at Wendy's as cashiers or on the "burger line" choose that job because it is what they wanted to do as a career? (I'm not talking about those with mental challenges.)
I don't judge people based on their jobs. I'm glad you don't either.
I just want my children to be well educated and have more options for their futures. Most people who are classically-minded homeschoolers would share this hope for their children, I would guess. I hope that doesn't offend YOU.
I'm really, truly sorry if I am coming off as offensive, but I would not be at all upset if my child chose Wendys as their career, so long as they were happy. I don't think there is anything wrong with retail jobs, or any job, so long as you are content in life.I have friends that range from cleaning up poo (seriously, they work with poo) to working at NASA. I love them all dearly, and don't think one is better than the other. They are all intelligent, all graduated high school, and most of them college.
Obviously there are times when a person cannot get a better job because of their intellect or desire, but mostly a job doesn't make a person. People can work the most meaningless job, and do the most amazing things on their off time.
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Mom was lecturing him the whole time, finishing off with, "Do you want to end up a loser working at Safeway like her?" and pointed at me. :cursing:
Interestingly enough, last week we were at Wendy's where the cashier (a nice, but obviously NEW and not-too-sure-what-to-do-yet, college-aged kid) told my daughter that she better study hard in school so she doesn't end up working as a cashier at Wendy's!
I tried to distract them both by pointing to the back/kitchen where we could see other young people trying desperately to keep up with orders. I smiled, turned to my dd, and said, "Look at that! She can make 3 burgers at once. They're really busy back there, aren't they?" Luckily, the cashier took the hint and dropped a few compliments about his fellow-fast-food-workers.
Honestly, though... I really *wouldn't* want my dd to work at Wendy's out of necessity. I'd like her to have more career options.
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:001_huh:
That is so rude! "The type of people working as cashiers . . ."
I think cashiers are just varied.
Ha! Of COURSE cashiers are varied...
MY mistake was in not being very specific with my comment: I was refering to the TYPE of cashiers that make the TYPE of comments the OP (and several other posters) was/were complaining about. Those TYPES of cashiers...
I've met some great supermarket cashiers. I just don't think that MOST of them fit that description... at least not where I live. Or... maybe I don't frequent the "right" supermarkets?
:)
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In my experience customers are more rude than cashiers.
When I was a cashier (at a bookstore) I did not have this experience. Most of the customers were wonderful. (Though I lived in NYC, where people don't interact too much with strangers, so they were just happy to pay quietly for their books and wanted quick, polite service.)
The only issues I ever had with rude customers was during the Christmas rush, when lines were long and people were tired... some people would roll their eyes when someone in front of them was unusually slow... or complain if something didn't work out quickly for them. I tried to remember that they were tired and overstressed, and I purposefully didn't take it personally. I know I've had moments when I was tired, stressed, and sick of waiting in line...
I seriously wouldn't want to be a cashier at that bookstore as a career. It gets truly boring after a while... but it was a good job for a short period of time. Most of the other cashiers were also college students... we had some really good conversations during downtimes...
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:iagree: Wow, I missed that the first time around. That is a rather sweeping judgement. Someone works as a cashier so then they must be an idiot, right? Kind of like the idea that if a mom stays home with her children she must be uneducated and lazy.
Ummm... nope. Perhaps you didn't read the quote I was responding to... or perhaps you missed my comment in parentheses that explained why I felt sorry for them? (boring job... maybe they were just trying to make it more entertaining)
Or... maybe the cashiers hired by MY local supermarket, for some reason, are not of the same type as those in your area? We have a LOT of disabled young adults who, quite honestly, don't have the social skills to know what sort of comments should not be made to strangers. (Like the comments the OP mentioned.) And, BTW, I've BEEN a cashier. Ha!
My original post was intended to respond to the types of comments the OP was complaining about... and many of the other posters mentioned inappropriate comments made as well...
Hey, maybe you don't mind strangers making comments about YOUR feminine products, the amount of food you purchase, whether or not you should be feeding your children certain foods, etc. In MY experience and in MY location, though, those types of comments are inappropriate for adults to make to strangers.
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Not elitist, Mary. I was responding specifically to the comments that I quoted in that post. Just out of curiosity, did you read that quote? Would YOU, when you were a cashier, have made comments like that? I KNOW I wouldn't have.
A long time ago, when I was putting myself through college, I worked at a large-chain bookstore. I did my time as a cashier. I also worked at a petstore (as a cashier). I have found, though, that most cashiers at supermarkets are not the same type you'd find at the bookstore... just sayin'.
I'm not being rude. Do you find cashiers where you live to be well-educated and socially aware, on average? This is not the case where I live. I *have* met sweet little ol' lady cashiers, and moms-needing-a-second-job cashiers. Where I live, though, they are NOT the norm in supermarkets. Hey... maybe I just frequent the wrong supermarkets!
Anyway... not intenting to be elistist or rude... just sharing my experience related to the TYPE of comments received by the OP.
Cheers!
Wow, is that ever an elitist comment. I did it for 5 months last year and aside from a few immature college students I worked with we all had knowledge and skills to carry on a conversation and know when to shut up. I chose the job because I could pick my hours, it was close to home and it paid off some property taxes we owed. Then I quit. I could have worked in a more esteemed position somewhere else, but it wouldn't have been convenient. I find your comment really rude. -
I understand why it bothers you... but you have to remember that, generally, the type of people working as cashiers probably don't have the knowledge or social skills to figure out that comments of this type to perfect strangers is inappropriate. I'd feel sorry for them instead. (Glad *I* don't have their job! It must be SO boring... maybe they're just trying to entertain themselves???)
I think you'd be "overly sensitive" if you were taking it personally. I, too, find it weirdly offensive that cashiers think it's ok to comment on the contents of my basket. Or b!tch about their boss to me, particularly when they're telling me how deathly ill they are but their boss wouldn't let them call in like everyone else did that day...while touching.my.food! :blink:I think I might need to move to France, where formality is still appreciated.
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I thought that a 2e child should be ahead in some areas and behind in others? Or is that just the tendency, so you are saying to make sure that you adapt so that their intelligence is showing even in their difficult subjects?
It's sort of like the child having a high ability, but having a dark cloak over their faces... THEY are frustrated by that cloak... THEY try to work through it... it takes a lot of energy. Many 2E kids end up thinking they're just stupid, which isn't the case at all. With the proper remediation, they can achieve what they've been trying to achieve all along.
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Knowing that my son was 2e, rather than "average with unspecified issues", changed my expectations. Instead of thinking of his reading as "good" for a struggling average student, my goal for him was to be able to read at a level commiserate with his underlying intelligence. So, I didn't relax about reading instruction until he was reading fluently several years beyond his grade-by-age level. I'm using reading as an example here but I've done this with all subjects.
I have a similar experience.
I did think of dd(7) as perhaps not as quick as her older brother IYKWIM, until we had the testing done. When we discovered the dyslexia, already having that number gave me the confidence I needed to remediate.
Some people were telling me to relax, she was just "normal," and I needed to back off on my expectations. She was reading at "grade level" and some other homeschooling moms thought I had issues to expect more. I realized *she* was frustrated. It was taking a LOT of energy for her to compensate. It really wasn't "normal" for her. And she had hit on her compensation skills by trial and error, which wasn't enough to ease her frustration and did not remediate efficiently. Knowing that number also allowed me to see the dyslexia symptoms more clearly as symptoms of dyslexia and not a "normal" child who was just slower at learning some things.
So, there were underlying issues. I was able to look for and find curriculum that I wouldn't have considered otherwise... and I was able to find on-line resources and support that HAS helped dd tremendously. I really wouldn't have looked for that otherwise.
Knowing that number also helps me to stop comparing the kids and assuming that one is "just slower" than the other. I'm thankful for the testing because it gave us subscores: detailed information on their strong and weak areas. I don't have to compare the kids' full-score numbers. I know dd has strengths in areas ds does not and vice versa, but I also know REASONS for that, which, IMVHO is very important.
The testing is not cheap, though... and you have to be sure to use someone who has lots of experience with gifted kids. Many testers have hardly EVER seen a gifted child (I was shocked to discover this) and have misinterpreted their responses, resulting in invalid scores.
Check out www.hoagiesgifted.org for more info on that.
Good luck!
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The only one I came up with was from the Gifted Development Center in Denver. They did indeed come up with a high likelihood of giftedness in a second child from the same family, however they didn't test all the children in the family
Laura,
I have read a couple and have been told of others, including one done by Deidre Lovecky in RI (but I don't know if it is published yet). I will search for specific references and post them... hopefully later this evening.
:)
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Dh is very bright but he had to work at learning in a way that I never had to.
We found out that dh (and his father) also have dyslexia. This type is highly inheritable. Anyway... dh has to work very hard at some things that seem to come easily to me... but I really think he probably has a higher IQ than I do. The thing is that compensating for disabilities takes a LOT of work. :)
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Most self-taught readers pick up the phonics by noticing the pattern while they're reading. Phonics is always a good idea, but I wouldn't use a typical early phonics "learn to read" program. By next year, she may be advanced enough to be bored by such a program... and she may rebel and whatnot. (Our oldest did this.) However, there are good phonics and spelling rule-based spelling curricula out there. If you wait a few years and notice that she's not picking up the phonics and spelling rules the way she picked up reading, you could use one of those programs.
Our experience: ds pretty much taught himself to read, though I insisted on using all of HOP with him. He didn't learn anything from it that he hadn't already figured out on his own. He did rebel, though, and complained, refused to focus on the lesson, etc. We never did follow through with much of a spelling program (tried Spelling Power for months at a time two/three years, dabbled in Sequential Spelling for a few months...). He's a good speller, but I think it's because he just remembers how to spell the words he's seen. He *can* sound things out, so he's not functioning with a deficit due to lack of phonics and spelling instruction.
YMMV of course!
:)
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Jean,
If the two kids ARE full biological siblings, there would be warning sirens going off for me, too. Study after study shows that siblings' and parents' IQ scores are generally very close. If your son is *highly* gifted, your dd would be likely to be at least moderately gifted, don't you think? I would be highly suspicious of something else going on if she was having so much trouble.
Background from our experience: our children have very similar IQ scores, but perform vastly differently in different areas. Dd has been found to have dyslexia, so this is the number one explanation for her struggles in language arts (reading and spelling) compared to her older brother. Additionally, ds is a visual-spatial learner with a near photographic visual memory while dd is a auditory-sequential learner with the ability to reproduce, musically, pretty much anything she hears with little repetition. So... different strokes for different folks... BUT there really could be some sort of learning challenge there. It may be a good idea to get testing. If there is an issue, you really want to remediate NOW to prevent lifelong frustration. (We used a psychologist recommended by the local school for the gifted for baseline IQ tests, and a developmental ophthamologist and neuropsych at Children's in Boston. Only the dev. ophthamologist was covered by our insurance, sigh! But it was worth it.)
Good luck!
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We've used whatever grammar/mechanics/usage was already contained in Sonlight's Language Arts plus a smattering of other "fun" stuff: the kids really enjoy Mad Libs and occasionally a little Schoolhouse Rock (Grammar Rock). Emma Serl's Intermediate Language Lessons was VERY gentle. I think it's intended for 4/5th grade use, but I used it with ds here and there when he was 7. He liked the variety in the lessons (not the same thing day after day).
Now that ds(10) is in school for the first time, his 6th grade English class does include grammar and diagramming (along with writing and a vocabulary curriculum). They use a Houghton Mifflin text.
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This would bother me as well. I would talk to the teacher and diplomatically ask what the educational goals are in assigning the book. There may be another book DD can read that you find more suitable that would serve the same purpose. This happened several times to me in high school, and my parents, teachers and I were always able to resolve the problem amicably usually with the substitution of another book. Just be prepared to explain what exactly it is about the book you find offensive. Most reasonable teachers will be willing to work with you :).
I agree!
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First, rule out tracking and convergence issues. You'll need a developmental/behavioral ophthalmologist. Then, if those things are not the trouble, you could ask your pediatrician for a referal to a neurodevelopmental psychologist. We did some pretty extensive testing to find dyslexia in our dd, but she was compensating. For those who really know dyslexia, the symptoms were obvious. Unfortunately, for those with little experience (like me), it wasn't obvious at all. I'm SO glad we found it, though, so we can remediate. She would have had SUCH a frustrating and limited educational experience growing up if we had never discovered the dyslexia. We would never have known where to start with the areas in which she struggles.
Truly... if you suspect it... do what you can to either rule it out or find the cause of her struggles. It'll be worth it!
:)
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dd2 took an online test for comprehension placement and was at the middle of 2nd grade.
Brooke,
What test? Do you have a link? I'd LOVE to find something like that!
TIA! :)
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I don't think that's typical...but... can you give us a specific example?
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:iagree: If you have a natural speller, I wouldn't worry about a spelling program at this point (1st grade). Imo, copywork & lots of reading are the best things for natural spellers (at least in the early grades).
I've got one of those (natural spellers). I agree with Stacia! Copywork (and later dictation) plus reading was PLENTY of spelling instruction for my natural speller.
Have fun!
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Try acting it out with her. I did that last week with dd for a dictation assignment.
Mom:"You be Glen. Say what he said. What did he say?
Dd: "This will be fun says Sid."
Mom: "Is that what he said??? Did he say 'This will be fun says Sid.'" I change my voice to "be" Sid better.
Dd looks confused.
Mom: What about you? When you talk, do you say "I like this macaroni and cheese says S_."
Dd giggles: "No!"
Mom: "Remember that 'says Sid' is the attribution. It attributes the words to a speaker. It tells you who is doing the speaking. So, let's try it again. You be Sid, but you're not actually going to SAY 'says Sid,' are you?"
Dd: "No. Okay... This will be fun."
Mom: "You got it! The dictation marks tell us what the person ACTUALLY said in the story. These are the words that came out of his mouth."
Dd put the dictation marks in the correct place after that exercise and has done so on several dictations since, without needing a reminder.
But... about convincing an 8-year-old-drama-queen that ficticious characters also *deserve* quotation marks??? I got nuthin. Sorry.
Good luck! :)
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I would suggest that perhaps it is a question of what the definition of "remediate" means. I would not say that using AAS with a 7 yo is remediating since the words are not that far below age appropriate grade level. (level 1 and 2 are typical 1st grade words)
I don't know if you are referring to my dd (her age is in my siggy), but I would suggest that remediation is not necessarily age-based. For *my* child, AAS is providing remediation. Dd started writing sentences (longer than 3 words) at 4 years old and her spelling has improved little since then. We have also found out that she has dyslexia. So, in this case, AAS is providing remediation.
I am curious to know why AAS could not remediate an 11 year old's spelling, though. Perhaps the 11 year old is already more advanced than AAS 1 and 2, and would need level 3? Perhaps an older child would need to move through the lower levels at a quicker pace? (Hard to want to do at the price of this curriculum, I know.) Or, perhaps adjustments could be made (like leaving out manipulating the tiles and just use a white board) to make the teaching method less young-child centered?
I'll have to check out Apples and Pears. I've heard of it before, but I've not yet seen it.
:)
Am I being overly sensitive?
in General Education Discussion Board
Posted
You know, I NEVER thought about the $$ thing when I made my first post. Honestly, though, it DID occur to me that, where *I* live, a LOT of the supermarket cashiers (as that is the type of cashier I believe the OP was discussing) are mentally-challenged young adults or ladies (usually ladies) who don't seem to know any better socially. So, if you're going to be offended, please don't be offended by the idea that I might have been referring to a low income job, but that I was referring to people who might not be as intelligent or as socially aware.
But, of course, I certainly did not mean ALL cashiers. I try to assume that the type that make those inappropriate comments do so because they "just don't know any better." It just seems like, around here, many of the cashiers would fit that description. Sigh.