Faithful_Steward
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Posts posted by Faithful_Steward
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Jumping to the end here, but is that NVLD new? That's DSM4, not DSM5. I understand why they're doing it, but you should ask them when they'll run pragmatics on him for social thinking, theory of mind, etc. There's usually that along with NVLD, and some kids with NVLD under DSM4 will cross over to ASD under DSM5. ASD gets you more funding, so it's a question to ask. And some people really don't cross over or come close and walk right up to it. I'm just saying it's something you could ask and watch.
I'm wondering if this is another typo. The doctor didn't say anything about NVLD and I didn't notice it until I got home. I'm pretty sure they use old profiles and copy/paste these reports, so it is possible that it is a mistake. They also call my son "her" throughout the report, and there was one line in my older son's report saying he has autism when it clearly says in 5 other places that it was definitively ruled out. So maybe I need to call the office and check on that. His pragmatics are fine. My older son is communicatively disordered and may eventually be diagnosed with social communication disorder. I'm definitely familiar with those struggles with pragmatics, and this little guy doesn't have them. Maybe there is another component to NVLD?
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ETA: Wait, did he get an official dyslexia diagnosis? I'm seeing NVLD, not dyslexia.
Sorry, just saw this. Yes, they said dyslexia. They said the NVLD is for the school system/iep.
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Fair Prospects said it much more succinctly: Professional Bias :) lol
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Ok, there is a lot going on here.
I think you've gotten some good advice, but some seems off too. The working memory seems to be addressed by ADHD meds. There is not much you can do to improve processing speed other than accommodate.
He is beyond AAR. IMHO, the advice to start with LIPS is sound. Those CTOPP results are very weak and that is one area you can gain a lot of improvement in with some targeted work. I'm not sure why he would think you can't teach him yourself. That may just be a professional bias.
What other issues you feel should be addressed right away? Maybe the dyspraxia? Has he seen an SLP?
I think the dyspraxia might be a typo now that I look at it. He only has articulation issues, no apraxia. And now that I think about it, the medical dyslexia might qualify him for private speech therapy through our insurance, so that's good.
I don't know what to address first. LIPS? What is the accommodation for processing speed? More time?
I thought the CTOPP results were pretty bad, too, so I was surprised by that the SLD reading was only considered moderate. Maybe because of his age? It might be because his IQ is average so there isn't as big a discrepancy as there would be if he was above average in that area.
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One question - you said that the doctor said that you couldn't teach him at home? Am I understanding that right? Why would that be?
Personally, I think this doctor is just a super high achiever and is of the mindset that we have to outsource to the best of the best. He wanted me to send our older son to one of several elite private schools, all of which are so out of our reach financially that it is laughable. There is just a disconnect between the ideal and reality. Either that or he's not accustomed to dealing with many parents who are willing and able to put in the work to learn to DIY. I don't know.
Thank you so much for your suggestions regarding his self-confidence. I could get him a Kindle for audiobooks, and I'm sure he would love to have more access to that. I almost feel relief now that I know that I can go way out of the box with this kid. My mind is racing with ideas. :)
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DS6 was just diagnosed with moderate dyslexia. I'm relieved to finally have it diagnosed, and I have a bit of a plan from reading these boards, but I would love any help you can give me with these test results.
----------------------------------------------*Deleted detailed testing info for privacy reasons. Thank you SO much for your help!---------------------------------------------------
I'd appreciate any specific recommendations for the dyslexia, as well as help prioritizing where to start. What stands out to you as the most pressing need?
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Update:
Just got the results of testing. He has dyslexia and pretty severe dysgraphia. Ruled out asd, confirmed ADHD. No real surprises. I am soooo glad to have caught this early!
I'm going to post later with questions about the results, but I just wanted to thank everyone again for your help and update this for anyone who stumbles on this later.
Deep breath... 😎
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I think we can burden ourselves quite a bit with the vision of what we'd *like* to do vs. what we *can* do, no matter how many kids we have. The dream and the reality just are not going to match up, at least not in my world.
Yes! We're military and we move a lot, so we don't even have backup in terms of family or close trusted friends. DH and I are "on" all the time. So I really do need to outsource some things and find *good enough* for the rest.
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The other problem with the mysterious "they" is that they don't acknowledge the ENERGY needed behind all this stuff to make it happen! It's not like stuff just happens on its own. Sometimes you need to hire that out, send them to a mentor, etc. Sometimes we have to be more realistic and we go 3-4 hours with me in the morning then the afternoon at x place with your mentor.
Tutors, paid teachers, these people come in fresh, being paid to turn it on. I'm sorry, but I'm no longer at a point where I just turn it on endlessly for every subject in every situation. There are things that might dd would enjoy doing that require some herd effect to get her to do. That takes mom energy or a class.
Yes, this. This is the crux of the issue.
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I'm pretty sure my DD would be bored silly, and/or bored to tears (lots of tears). She whines about most documentaries, and doesn't like Khan Academy videos.
We have gone to mostly child-led. With your crew, I would probably look at a unit study approach and let them pick topics by consensus.
My DD DOES need a lot of structure, but we keep the structure in her day through her daily morning/evening/chore routines rather than through the type of curriculum we employ. This is working better than the online school did, which had a great deal of regimentation but also demoralizing demands for more output and a higher pace than she was capable of (even with an IEP).
Yes, I'm worried that my kids would be bored silly, too. And that will bring on more behavior challenges. Everything I read about kids like mine says they need more academic freedom and more hands-on learning situations. I just don't know how to work with this and still maintain my sanity. :)
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Are you already using daily work checklists? Does every child have a checklist and clear structure? It sounds like you need some environmental control (definitions of where we're supposed to be, body in group, but also places with a door for older kids to protect their stuff).
I don't think science is over for the year because it kit was destroyed. The older should have put it away, so she pays. The younger destroyed it, so he pays. You could replace it. You could go this is a Mom Lesson and we're going to move to something with more structure. But I think it's not just one thing. You're not going to be any more organized with videos than you are now if you don't actually see the holes, kwim?
Checklists, clear structure, plans for everyone, visible plans, incentives to work the plan, consequences if they aren't on plan.
Honestly, I'd sit them all down and do social skills every morning. Of course I just went to a Social Thinking workshop, so that's on the brain, lol. But think with me. They learn about body in the group, the group has a plan, people have feelings, expected vs. unexpected behavior. Think about how some common language, a group meeting every morning for 10 minutes where you talk about this stuff, could help that.
Do you use timers? You don't have to have so much of an hour by hour schedule, though honestly maybe you need to. You could have check-in points that give you structure, like breakfast is at 8:30, family meeting at 9:00, end of discussion, you must be there. Then repeat at noon or whatever with another family checkin.
Do you think your kids will actually sit for the courses and comply?
Yes, I do all of this, though I'm sure I could do more. The three oldest kids have their own desks in the schoolroom. I work with the little one at a small table in another room. They have checklists, calendars, places to put completed work, schedules, etc... But like I said, they require constant supervision and direction to make sure they are doing what they are supposed to be doing. I can't do that while I'm teaching other kids and supervising the toddler. But I also can't teach in the same room with other kids because it is too distracting for them. We used to have timers but they lost one and broke two.
We're zoned for a great (overcrowded) school in a great district in a great state. I'm trying to compare what I can realistically offer at home vs what the school can realistically offer.
I never used video courses, so I can't help you there, but I can sympathize. I had a very hard time meeting the needs of each of my kids, because they each needed so much help. They did have independent work once they were old enough, but it was not enough to keep them occupied and out of trouble. Even when they were on task, they would interrupt me as I was working with another child, to ask questions (even though they knew they would always have their own time to work with me and ask questions). I was frazzled. There was just not enough of me to go around, and I always felt overwhelmed.
I always felt the solution was providing lots of structure and keeping them busy with productive things (easy to say but hard to do). I'll share a couple of things that did help me. We only did schoolwork in one area of the house, and I was always there with them. We had one big table that we used for group lessons (anything that you can do as a group will help you), and in an adjacent area they each had a desk for independent work. We all did school at the same time. If someone finished or needed a break, they could play quietly nearby (our school area was in our basement, so we had a play area there), but they still stayed in the vicinity.
When they were little, I used a picture schedule with velcro tabs, so that we could rearrange the order of the pictures or take them off the board once we were done with that activity. When they were older, we switched to checklists.
I'm not sure how video courses work, exactly, but I'm guessing they will still have assignments to complete and that you will still have to oversee everything and work with them on areas where they need more help. If you can set up a system so that some of them watch their lessons while you work with others, and then switch, it might be a way to give them some structure and a productive way to use their time when you are otherwise occupied. I don't think it will be a cure all, but it might be a tool that you can use to make your days run more smoothly.
Thank you. Frazzled and overwhelmed are good words. We all do really well when I stick to a strict schedule and a super structured environment, but that takes so much energy to maintain that it is hard to stick with long term. How are your kids doing in school? How has it been having one at home and some at school?
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Uggh, I keep editing my previous post but I can't seem to fix the wonky formatting!
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----------------- (edited for privacy)-----------------------------
Right now we mostly do the basics and read a lot. They love science and do a lot of Thames and Kosmos kits on their own. I tried Exploration Eduation with my 6th grader but she left her project and the kit out and her little brother destroyed it. Each lesson and project builds on the last, so science was ruined for the rest of the year. When I'm working with another kid they either disappear (not working on their assignment) or destroy something, depending on which kid we're talking about. :) They just really need a lot of supervision and direction.
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My kids need a highly structured environment, and there are just too many of them. :) They crave lots of discussion and mom-time, but there are simply too many disruptions and demands on my attention. DH has adhd and thinks a super structured dvd curriculum is the way to go. I think it might be boring, but IME my gifted side was satisfied with stimulating people and experiences outside of school rather than my gifted classes (or even accelerated or honors classes for that matter). I also think all of the drilling and memory work would be good for their working memory/processing speed issues. But I also worry about an entire year of kids whining that school is boring, too hard, too much work, or too long.
(PS is always on the table, but I'm not wanting to explore that in this thread.)
I guess I've just never heard of anyone with ld or 2E kids going this route, and I'd like input on the validity of that option for adhd/ld/gifted kids.
Thanks!
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INTJ. It seems a little anticlimactic at this point. 😋
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Try looking for positions as a peak-time teller in a bank.
Dental office
Office or non-instructional position at a local public school
Have you asked around at your kids' school?
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Go with SWB's suggestions. FLL 1-4 followed by R&S. FLL has more memory work and is just overall a lot more pleasant for a young child. R&S is open-and-go and thorough, but it can be dry and tedious, especially if you use it year after year after year.
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My daughter went from Saxon 7/6 to AoPS Prealgebra. Math is not her best subject and she was 10 when she started. It took two years to complete the Prealgebra and part of a Dolciani book. She is now doing the Intro to Algebra book. It will, again, take her longer than a school year. She will have to work this summer to complete the first 13 chapters, partly because she doesn't spend enough time each day for a kid who isn't absolutely fabulous at math. I will probably make her review Algebra 1 next year while she is working on Geometry just to make sure she really has it.
Do you think another year of Saxon would have been better prep? How does she feel about the switch?
Why not just try it out? I was able to get the book used for a very reasonable price. Plan on going slowly if necessary. It does make math more interesting, but can get overwhelming for a non-mathy type if pushed to move through the material too quickly, IMHO.
FWIW, we use CLE (similar to Saxon in many ways) as the spine but AoPS Pre-Algebra is a great program and definitely worth a shot. DS finds it much more engaging than CLE (but he needs the constant review of CLE to retain material).
I could, of course. ;) I guess I'm afraid to discourage her or destroy her fledling confidence.
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I get it, really I do! I just don't have the support from my husband for that. I had a long conversation with him last night, though, and got him to understand that even if he disagrees with me that the behavior is "not normal", that I need him to understand that I am not able to continue dealing with it the way it is. That I cannot keep living this way 24/7, because it really is! I get short breaks, but I need more breaks and I need more help and I need strategies to help reduce the behaviors because I cannot cope any longer.
You're at that "not normal" point now. Documenting everything is a great idea and I hope it helps your and your husband get on the same page.
Your feelings are normal for a situation where things aren't quite right.
One of my adhd+ kids is like this. But I didn't see the sweetness much until we got his sleep under control. The kid never slept, even as a baby. He just COULD NOT turn himself off. This past year (5 y/o) a doctor finally started taking us seriously and had us put him on melatonin and a strict bedtime routine. He was a game-changer for us. Now he consistently gets 11-12 hours of sleep at night. He is sweet and fun and cheerful for the first time ever. But he still has adhd and sensory issues. He's still impulsive and emotional. He takes a lot out of us, but it is different now because we no longer feel like we can't cope. At age 3, I think the recommendations are 12-14 hours of sleep per day. If your child isn't getting that consistently, that would be a great place to start. (PM me if you want the recommendations our doctor and sleep specialist gave us.)
I don't know where you live, but my state sponsors several clinics that do full-service evals if you have enough red flags for autism or autism-related disorders. From what I understand they have really tightened the range of the spectrum, but there are still kids on the outside with issues that need support. Honestly, I know very little about these things and I rely on my kids' NDP and his team to help us make sense of things. FWIW, I'd drop the word "autism" from your conversations with your dh and switch to more general language. None of my kids have autism, but I do have three with adhd and lots of bonus issues that weren't even on our radar. :) Those evals were invaluable. I completely understand that they aren't an option for you right now, but I think I'd quietly cast a wider net and see if there are any free or low-cost options available to you.
I just wanted to let you know that you're not alone and I don't think you're crazy. My husband was pretty resistant to pursuing evals for another one of our children until that child got much older and it was super obvious that there was something going on. Even his doctor kept blowing me off. We both really wish we had aggressively pursued help earlier because it took a lot of stress off of our marriage and our relationship with our child.
Good luck!
(edited for typo)
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Don't laugh. :) :)
DD has always hated math, even in our Singapore years before she started the Saxon sequence. We've stuck with Saxon through 7/6 and in the past year things have finally clicked with her. She's consistently getting 90%+ on her tests and daily work. I've always taught her conceptually, so it isn't all plug and chug. But obviously she doesn't have the sophisticated problem-solving skills or mental math capabilities she might have had if she'd gone through a different elementary math series.
It seems crazy to consider AOPS Pre A for a kid like her, but I'm hoping it isn't too late to awaken in her a love of math (especially now that she's got some confidence). And she absolutely ADORES the RR videos. I've looked at some of the samples and it really doesn't look scary to me. I don't want to throw her in the deep end, but I'd like to try.
She's a fun, language-oriented kid with a quirky sense of humor. She isn't math-oriented like some of my other kids, but I feel like she may love upper-level maths if I can get her there intact. :)
Anyone done this? How did it go?
Thanks!
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How is his sleep? Is he able to fall asleep on his own at a reasonable hour? Does he stay in bed at night? Does he nap or rest during the day?
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Deep sea fishing
Scalloping
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Go camping/tubing at one of the springs near Gainesville. There are lots to choose from.
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Help with CTOPP, WISC and where to go from here (dyslexia, dysgraphia)
in The Learning Challenges Board
Posted
A little overwhelmed but not surprised. I actually feel a bit relieved to have the diagnosis and a clear picture of what is going on. They saw exactly what I was seeing in pretty much every area. The report says that his results might be affected by the impulsivity and behavior issues when things got hard, but he didn't feel like it was worth the expense of doing it again.
Mostly I feel like I don't want to deal with it right now. My son is happier than ever since being on his meds and things have really been stabilizing around here. We're enjoying the pool and the beach and camping, and I really really really don't want to deal with it yet.