Chocomom63
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Posts posted by Chocomom63
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I know it's been awhile since I've posted, but I am in need of mom therapy or something. My dd13 will start ps for the first time next week and while I think it's right for her and I think she'll be fine, I'm not sure about me. I don't know how to feel about this - it's just a lot to take in. Today we got her schedule and locker and looked at all her classrooms - even met three of her teachers. She is really excited and I feel okay about it, but I'm sad. It's not what was in the plan and it came as a shock earlier this year when she said she wanted to go.
I don't have a question although any advice for a first time school goer is appreciated. I just want a hug I guess - this is hard. In some ways I'm glad she and I won't be going 3 rounds about schoolwork, in fact since she knew she was going to ps, she suddenly decided to do the work and not complain. Whatever. :-) But I will certainly miss her and I know her sisters will too. Any advice for getting through the first month or so until it becomes more normal? Thanks for listening - I just don't have a shoulder to cry on.
Chocomom63
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For me, it's the part at the end of A Christmas Story when Ralphie's father suddenly turns into a big softie telling Ralph how to load his BB Gun and the end of Little Drummer Boy when the boy is singing to the Christ Child. I'm always hoping the kids don't notice.
However, most recently, when I watched Love Actually for the first time (yeah, I'm pretty late to that party). It's the funeral scene when they play the Bay City Roller's Bye Bye Baby. I'm not sure if it was just the song and memories of my teenage years or the funeral that gets me. Probably both. :-)
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Careful, you might get addicted to all that awesomeness.
:laugh:
Yeah, I'm thinking that might happen. :-) I really wanted to do a less structured year this year and it just didn't happen. I recently found all the great books I had bought last summer languishing on my bookshelves and haven't even used them.
BTW - love the dancing bacon you have going there.
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Okay, I'm back. The decision has been made and my ds14 and my dd13 will be going to ps in the fall. I will be hs'ing my twins for one more year and then it's off to ps for them too. Obviously, if something does not pan out, at least I'll know how to hs them. But I really hope it works out.
So, we took off a couple of weeks in February just so I could process and decide what to do now. We're still doing math and we are finishing books that we had been reading. What I really want to do is just shove all the books aside (except math and do some kind of writing every day) and do other things. Like cooking, museums, parks, etc. Every day life kind of teaching. I want to make these last few months different from all the other years we've had.
So my question is this - have any of you ever said forget the usual stuff, we're going to do something really different instead? If so, how did you do it?
Thanks and I'll try to pop in more often to reply. But if I don't just know that I'm listening anyway. I'm just a quiet person that's all.
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Sometimes, something may look great on paper, you may have a well thought out plan with good options... and you still just don't *want* to do it. And that's not bad or wrong, it just is.
I get what you're saying about your son... mine likes homeschooling and would enjoy staying home longer. We do like spending time together. However, a big part of his feeling is that he likes to get his work done fast, not dig into anything too deeply, and have lots of free time for video games. :glare: For a variety of reasons, we are looking at returning him to school next year. I want him to have more opportunity for activities and friendships (we don't have a lot of homeschooling activities here), and sometimes, I think he'd just learn better from someone else. I'd like to return to being mom and not teacher.
There's nothing wrong with saying that this is the next season of their school life, and that you'd like them to experience learning from different perspectives and have the opportunity to meet new people and try new things.
If you're really committed to homeschooling and *you* really *want* to keep doing it, there's usually a way to make it work.... I think it's fantastic when both parents and kids partner to go all the way to the end! But if you don't want to, there's nothing inherently wrong with making the choice to send the kids to school. Millions of families do it every day, after all. ;) It just has to be on the right terms for your family. Good luck in making the arrangements!!
Yes - this! Thank you!
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If your ds does not want to go to school, and expressing that to you, I would not push it and send him. Is there a reason why you can't keep him at home?
I agree. Can you change to curricula that is more independent and less teacher intensive?
He'll be losing the perks of homeschooling - getting up earlier, playing his Nintendo DS when he wants, that kind of stuff. There's a Rugrats episode where Angelica's parents sign her up for camp and she doesn't want to go saying, "But I'm your little princess" and Drew and Charlotte say - "She's going!". That's the moment I experienced when my son told me, "But I don't want to get up early!". He also needs to be with other kids his age and stretch his wings and stretch himself.
Reasons 2 and 3 are - I don't do high school well and I'm worn out by it all. (Those are my reasons)
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Hi all! Sorry that I'm not replying personally to each of your posts but I'll highlight my thoughts here. You all gave such great information and ideas on who to contact and especially the info about high school credits. I'm one of those homeschoolers who tossed grades and grading out the window years ago so it's good to know what to expect. I had a good talk with my dd yesterday about why she wants to try school and it's as expected - she bored and she wants to get out and see what else is out there. My ds doesn't want to go to school but I can't get a definite why out of him. I still want him to try at least one year - he'd be in 9th grade so we could start fresh in high school (he is almost 15). How to explain all this to my kids is going to be my next question - I just can't seem to frame it right. However I've talked with most of the kids about it - especially my older kids - and it's an interesting ongoing conversation. Lots of thoughts of their experience to help with this. Anyway - that question is for another day.
A few of you suggested looking at the school website and I did that last night and found the information on what we'd need to enroll. The mid high had a good slide show (I know it's called power point but I'm old and slide show is what it is to me) on what is required for graduation and what classes to take when. So that was good. I feel a little more prepared. I guess my next move will be to call the schools and talk to a counselor in each.
Ellie - lots of good information on what to provide to the schools - thank you! I'd often wondered how I would present all that and I'm going to be working on that this month so it's done.
Mimm - Good luck to you too! I'm glad you have had a good experience so far - I hope I can say the same. That is the part I am dreading the most I think. Luckily I know what both schools look like as I've been in both as a kid. :-)
LLMom - Thank you for your kind words and this is interesting you're here because I found your website last week when I googled the subject of putting hs kids in ps. :-) I've been reading daily. I also found another site that you mentioned in one of your posts and have found a lot of good stuff there too. It's been a grace - thank you so much!
To everyone else - again - thank you for sharing your experience! I hope my transition is as good as yours have been and it helps to know what to expect. I also hope you can stand a few more questions as I go through this.
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I'm not sure if The Chat is where this topic should go but I thought I'd start here and if someone says it should be someplace else they can move it.
I've been thinking a lot on this whole of sending the kids to school thing, and I believe it is going to be the right thing to do for our family. I am worn out and I need to (for the first time in my mommy career) think about what might be best for me so I can be the best mom to my kids. I am finally starting to take care of myself and consider my own needs and while it feels weird it is what I need to do. This is really the issue - I can't do it all anymore. And I need to be a mom to my kids first.
The tentative plan is two will be in school (one middle schooler and one high schooler) and then I'll keep the younger two at home another year before sending them off to school. Unless they cry and beg and whine so much I put them in too. We'll see. I'm already daydreaming of freer days ahead but I'm sure I'll need that bubble popped. :-)
So, my question is where do I start? What do I need to consider before we say this is what we're going to do? And who do I talk with about this at the schools when that decision is made?
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Welcome!
Thank you!
Welcome to the boards. I put my youngest 2 into school after 19 yrs homeschooling. I also had an older one go to school at 12 because she had needs I couldn't meet at home (it was a great decision for her, btw).
One of the younger 2 also told me she thought private school was better than homeschooling. Yeah, it hurt for sure, but I had to be honest with myself that the fire had gone out of my belly for homeschooling. I wasn't giving my all anymore and the youngers got the short-shrift. I miss having my kids around but I don't miss homeschooling - if that makes sense. My kids are thriving in private and I think it was the right decision for our family. I don't think of it as failing at homeschooling - it was just time to retire. I probably waited about 2 yrs too long for the younger ones (I still had one last homeschooling jr/sr at that time but he was happy doing independent and outside classes).
Good luck.
Thank you for sharing your experience. Many of your feelings are mine - fire going out and all that. I am giving as much as I can, and while I enjoy teaching, but the last couple of years I just feel wiped out with it. I've had some life balance issues for awhile and that is playing into it too. BTW - I looked at your blog and I'm not quite where you are yet on my mothering journey. No married kids yet - my oldest is content in his bachelorhood.
Thanks again to all who commented and even if you just viewed and maybe prayed - I need it all right now! I feel better now though and not as panicky - it won't be until August so there's lots of time to prepare myself. As soon as I can put some questions and things on paper I'll be back to ask for some specifics. Again - thank you!
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My youngest started public school last year as a freshman. She says it's a lot better than homeschooling. That hurt me. However, she is doing excellent and feels good about herself. She was totally prepared for school and knew how to study more than some of her friends. She even tutors a friend in her math class. It was definitely the right decision for her. I only have my 17 yr. old son at home now and it's rough. High school is a lot harder than it was when I was in school, or maybe I just used to be smarter. :)
I've never felt I've done well with high school so in a way I'm kind of ready to let my older two go. I think school is just different now - so much has changed since I went. Some of it not great, but I think better in other ways. I was really bored in high school and I have learned so much more homeschooling my kids! Thanks for sharing your experience - glad that all is going well.
Welcome to the forum -- you've come to the right place!!! :)
Thank you - I think so too. :-)
Welcome!
I graduated my oldest, but then my next decided to go to an arts highschool for 11th grade. My two next kids have their eyes on the arts school, too- so my end is coming, too. I think the general feeling here is that we do what is best for each family/and/or our family. Wishing you a great year, stick around, this is a nice place :)
That's always how I've felt too - that we do what is best no matter where our kids go to school. There is no one right way. Thanks for your good wishes - I need them!
Yet another BDTD mom here.
:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:
I have a Beach High grad who started community college and moved in with her grandmother at fifteen, a PS grad who moved in with his father at fifteen, and a kindergartener.
I hope you stick around and get the support that you deserve. You are not a failure, you are an incredibly valuable resource to those who are just starting out.
Well done. I wish I could give you a gold watch to show my respect and best wishes for a happy and productive retirement.
Thank you so much for your kind words! I will indeed be sticking around. Not quite retiring yet though - I have two 10 year olds who'll be sticking with me at least another year.
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Welcome, Chocomom. I haven't btdt with that particular situation but I know that many others have. I can't give you any wisdom but you have my support! :grouphug:
Thanks Jean! Support is much needed right now!
Hi there!
When DS(now 18!) hit 9th grade, he really wanted to go to public high school. It was a tough transition for me as I was really used to the pattern of our days - homeschooling was what we "did"! Well, he went and it was ok. He is back at home again for his senior year using a charter school. We have all enjoyed going back to the "homeschool routine" and the slower pace.
I think the jump into high school is a natural sort of transition point - especially if you are in an area that is all-or-nothing for public high school. I know it helped me with DS's transition to have DD12 still homeschooling - something to do, something to keep me busy. I don't see her wanting to go to regular high school, though she might want to take a class or two there. But with two in college and DS18 headed off in the fall, our lives are changing to be less kid-focused.
And - now that I've gotten used to it -- I think it will be just fine.
I can relate so much to your feelings! After so long it really is our life and I've put so much time into it. But I'm starting to stretch my wings a little too now that my kids are older. Still feeling like a fish out of water sometimes though.
I talked with son #3 today and he thinks it's too late for my 14 yo ds to go to school after not ever having been. I told him that plenty of kids do fine. I think my daughter thought I was going to drive her to school right away - when I told her that I was going to have her finish her current math book and move on to Key to Fractions she told me "no". This is the way it's been for a couple of years now and I'm getting battle weary. I need to point out to her though that it won't be until August when she goes. :-)
Welcome!
Regards,
Kareni
Thank you!
:grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:
My sister sent all of her children to public school this year because she felt like it was time for a variety of reasons. If I wasn't certain that you couldn't be her (since her kids are already there, and she doesn't like chocolate! :D ) I'd wonder, because she expressed similar feelings. She was a good teacher, and her children were learning well and her older children well-prepared to move out into the world once they completed their homeschool studies.
If it's any consolation, her children who entered public school are thriving, felt well prepared for their new schools, and seem to appreciate the solid teaching and home life that homeschooling provided as a base for the new adventure.
Welcome to the boards! :)
Cat
Thank you for the welcome and sharing your sister's experience. I'm not as convinced that my kids are well prepared - in some areas yes, but not in others. I feel like there is going to be a lot I still need to do. BTW - definitely not your sister since I'm basically a chocoholic...and ditto for coffee. :-)
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I just wanted to say HI and to say that I'm new here, but not new to homeschooling. I am also an old mom - as my kiddos like to remind me. Often.
I have been homeschooling for almost 20 years (I have graduated 3 already - almost 4), but (and this is the reason for joining) it is going to be ending soon I think. I have had the sense for about a year now that some of my kids really do not like homeschooling anymore and want to go to public school. I outright asked my two older children (13 and 14 respectively) how they felt about it (going to ps) and my dd's eyes lit up like a Christmas tree. I think it's time to test out those waters.
To say my heart sank would be an understatement. The last six years have been ones of a lot of blood, sweat, and tears for my family and I've grown a lot because of it. It seems that I am being asked to grow a little more. And I think it's time. Right now though all I feel is sad and kind of in shock. Also feeling that I really didn't do as well as I thought I had. I know that isn't correct, but it's how I feel. Actually, it's a jumble of feelings that I can't quite sort out. .
So, I would like to ask for your support and wisdom as I approach this possibly (but most likely) new time in my life. I know this sounds kind of formal and maybe TMI right off the bat, but I just wanted to have an introduction of sorts and not just jump in with a million questions. I also know this is a forum for homeschooling parents, but I need help making this time of change (upheaval) and I thought this might be the place to find that help. I'll still be homeschooling my two younger girls for at least the next year, but maybe put them in middle school in the fall of 2015 so I won't be totally of the loop.
Thank you for listening and I look forward to getting to know you.
Daughter going to ps for the first time
in General Education Discussion Board
Posted
Finally getting back here to reply - sorry - my life has been crazy busy all summer! Thank you to everyone who replied and if you said a little prayer for me or wished us luck - thank you for that too.
TGHEALTHYMOM - sorry you are going through this too. It's such a huge change for everyone isn't it? I was so nervous approaching the school, but after Friday I feel a little bit better. You have my support and I'm glad you have a potential friend too. That'll be a great help to you both.
OneStepAtATime - Great advice!! I'm going to remember your words as my dd and I go through this together. I keep trying to remember how it was when I was that young and that helps too. Yesterday, she said that she's starting to wonder if she's doing the right thing so we talked about that too. She has what I didn't: a loving family supporting her - and that's going to go a long way. Am I still worried? Oh yeah!
Sadie - It sounds like overall it's been a mostly good transition for your dd. I'm hoping for the same.
JMcElrath - thanks for the hug - really needed that :-)
LLMom - Thanks again for directing me to your blog - I actually do have it favorited so I check in often. Thanks for all the good advice and sharing of your personal experience - really helps!
I think the two biggest things for my dd to deal with will be the amount of kids and the amount of teachers she will have. I've been very positive with my words though and explaining from my experience (even though that was an eon ago), and the counselor has also told her that her door is open should my dd need help at any time. The time we spend walking to and from school can be special time to listen to her as well. I just hope this highly opinionated mom can know when to keep her big mouth shut. We are talkers in our family.
I took my daughter school supply shopping yesterday and we had such a good time! She picked out the things we know she needs now and then we'll wait to see what extra things her teachers will want. We also got frapps at Starbucks to celebrate this new chapter in her life as well. When Tuesday comes around though and I see her off to school you can bet this is one mom who will need a truckload of kleenex on the walk home.
I did also want to give a mini update on my son who did not want to go to ps - we decided to let him do high school at home for now. So, I'll be homeschooling 3 this year, but it still may be my last year depending on their sister's experience this year. After 20 years of homeschooling my life is changing fast and not sure how to feel about that - the nest is emptying in various ways.
Hugs to everyone else going through this as well - you have my support.