[s/o Names -- How did you get yours???]

My father insists the names of his first 3 (out of 4) children came to him whole, in a dream, when he was 13 or 14 years old. The dream tapered off before my youngest brother was born (he was a surprise later baby when he did come). Back in the '70s, my father had a slightly joking/adversarial relationship with my mother's OB and they would joke about the sex of each of us and my father always turned out to be right, much to the OB's chagrin. 

 

Despite this family story, I do know he and my mother debated about the names, and my middle name is also a slight nod to my maternal grandmother's wishes. She was strongly pushing for me to be MaryAnn (one word). Both of her grandmothers were named MaryAnn. My oldest and favorite doll was named MaryAnn (she gave it to me). 

 

Whether my father won over all these discussions (probable) or his view shifted (also possible), I don't know. Definitely my middle name is the rather dull Ann. My mother did win out in some ways though. Everyone always called me by my very, very popular nickname. I only reclaimed my first name when I went to college. 

[Favorite board games and read alouds with your 8(ish) year old girls?]

Games: Sushi Go!, Bohnanza, and Mustache Smash

 

Read aloud for 8 year old girls? Encyclopedia Brown, Little House books, Amelia Bedelia, EB White books, Roald Dahl books, Shel Silverstein, Beverly Cleary books (Ramona, Mouse and Motorcycle), Mr. and Mrs. Green, George and Martha.

[Book a Week 2015 - W18: Machiavellian May]

Whoa.  Just finished Saga.  That was different than I normally read and some of the scenes are a bit *spicy*.  (Angel - this is not the book for you!)  The plot and world building and characters ... HOW COOL!

 

Thank you Robin!  Good choice.  

 

DH and I both enjoyed Saga last year. It's really well-written, but it is probably about as far as I can go, personally. I'm not in a hurry to catch up to #27, or whatever they're at now. 

 

I read that the illustrator almost didn't do the first one because of the child trafficking, but after some thought she decided it was an important subject and went through with it. I'm glad she did. There was at least one point where I almost put the thing down, but her art was so over-the-top it felt more ironic and ridiculous rather than exploitive. She did a great job building it up for the punch, kind of like Ursula LeGuin's story "Those Who Walk Away from Omelas."  I really enjoyed the humor about birth. It's a very adult comic (and I don't just mean the sex...tons of comics have sex/nudity/violence...the tone of this comic is older and more female-positive which is not standard in this world).

 

I found it interesting that something as simple as a romance novel challenged one person's worldview the way it did. 

 

Do either of you plan on reading more of the series? 

[I Just Played...2015 edition]

 

It was our anniversary over the weekend and we played Akrotiri. Akrotiri is a game where you are traders exploring the Greek islands and uncovering temples. Players place a tile containing islands and sailing routes. One of those islands is marked with a color/symbol, a corresponding resource is added to the island and players can choose another resource to place on a different island. Most of the game is spent manipulating where markers and resources can be found and then trading in various resources for money. Money is spent to renew temples which correspond to our goals. 

 

 

At the beginning of the game players are given goal cards (or 'maps' in the game) which show the location of various temples. So many red, blue, gray, or green symbols to the north, south, east, or west of the temple location. 

 

 

Much like Forbidden Desert (which I described above in the thread), the temples do not exist in real space. They depend on where you have placed previous symbols and the island you which fits within the map's perspective. You are molding and manipulating the board to match what you need. Everything is done from your own perspective. Your opponent, on a different side of the board, has a very different view of what "north" or "south" is. You each use every placement on the board, no matter who placed it, although once a temple is 'uncovered' on an island no one else can use that island for their map. Claiming maps (goal cards) and paying for the temples renewal gives players points they collect until someone places all their temples. 

 

As a person who likes slightly more complex/strategic games without playing for more than an hour, experiencing lots of analysis paralysis, or games with a million fiddly rules I really enjoyed this. The actions available and the trading were fairly simple, but the placement of the routes and islands to meet your maps (goals) was more challenging and I enjoyed the spatial element. It was fun (like Container) to put the little squares on the boats and move them around. Recommended. 

 

 

[Book a Week 2015 - W18: Machiavellian May]

I wanted to say I'm sorry for the death of a friend and the struggles with age here. DH's mother is near the end of a battle with early onset dementia and we struggle along with her. It's a good struggle. We love her and want to make things positive for her. When people lose their ability to communicate you put love in a hundred metaphors and hope that one of them catches. You hope to see the love received and reflected back for one moment. 

 

:grouphug: , Jane. I have another friend who lost two elderly friends in the past week too. We are struggling right now with my dear fil's health, which is deteriorating. It's heartbreaking & is hitting my dh hard (me too).

 

Just not much concentration for reading lately. I'm still working on Pratchett's Going Postal. My slow pace does not indicate anything other than I'm completely scattered & swamped lately. I'm thoroughly enjoying it & can see why both my ds & Jenn love Moist von Lipwig! He is cracking me up. I guess Vetinari can be my character stand-in right now for Machiavellian May, eh?

 

I think Vetinari is most Machiavellian. :)

 

Reading Adrienne Rich's collected poems this week. Here is canto (?) 5 from her poem "North American Time.

V
Suppose you want to write
of a woman braiding
another woman's hair—
staightdown, or with beads and shells 50 in three-strand plaits or corn-rows—
you had better know the thickness
the length the pattern
why she decides to braid her hair
how it is done to her
what country it happens in
what else happens in that country

You have to know these things
...
I really like Adrienne Rich. Somehow her poems inspire me to write mine. Why? Why are some poets inspirational and some are not, no matter how good?

 

I think inspiration is about connection. Sometimes a poet is good but we don't connect with them (for whatever reason...different experiences, understanding, etc.). It's really a charge when you do connect with a poet, isn't it? I'm not a gambler at heart, but poetry is a beautiful gamble and I love when it pays out. 

 

I'm reading Jorie Graham right now. 

 

The Way Things Work

 

is by admitting 
or opening away. 
This is the simplest form 
of current: Blue 
moving through blue; 
blue through purple; 
the objects of desire 
opening upon themselves 
without us; the objects of faith. 
The way things work 
is by solution, 
resistance lessened or 
increased and taken 
advantage of. 
The way things work 
is that we finally believe 
they are there, 
common and able 
to illustrate themselves. 
Wheel, kinetic flow, 
rising and falling water, 
ingots, levers and keys, 
I believe in you, 
cylinder lock, pully, 
lifting tackle and 
crane lift your small head-- 
I believe in you--
your head is the horizon to
my hand. I believe 
forever in the hooks. 
The way things work 
is that eventually 
something catches. 

[Amazon Prime vs. Netflix]

It shifts back and forth. 

 

Last time we had Netflix streaming it was pretty poor. I couldn't find much to watch. Up until recently Amazon had everything but the most recent season of BBC and HBO shows streaming free, so there was a lot to watch, especially if you haven't done cable extras in the last ten years. Movies cycled in and out with new ones coming in every week or two. Usually 1 or 2 newer or more popular ones and a wide range of other ones. The children's selections are particularly good (which is why we sprang for Prime actually). 

 

At the moment we're doing Netflix again, and I think at this moment there's more there for teens/adults. Honestly, I don't think the movie selection is much better than Prime, but there are different tv shows there so for a non-HBO watcher (me) there's more to watch now that all those BBC shows have been pulled from Prime. 

[What do you do....CC....when]

I do agree with clementine. 

 

What do you want in a friend? It would be easier to decide what kind of person you like and then look for some organization you can join to meet those people. It really sounds like you need some new connections and a new direction for your life. What do you love? 

[Book a Week 2015 - W17: Poem in your Pocket]

Can someone please recommend a good non-fiction book to me. I would love something sociology type. It needs to be available on kindle

 

My first thought was The Forest People by Colin Turnbull or A Primate's Memoir by Robert Sapolsky, although they fall more on the anthropology or social biology sides of Sociology spectrum. I think they came to mind because of your Congo studies. The Forest People is a '60s memoir/study of living with the Mbuti Pygmies (Congo) which was very human and enjoyable. Sapolsky's memoir of his youth studying baboons in Kenya is also lighter with lots of elements of humor and social biology/biological evolution. 

 

Both are memoirs, so they generally stay out of specialized vocabulary, but both have lots of interesting thoughts and some humor. 

[I Just Played...2015 edition]

I haven't been playing anything new lately, but dh and the older boys went to the Gaming Hoopla last weekend and had a great time. (SN ds and I stayed home because he needed to stay close to home.)

 

 

Before dh left we played Oceania, which is a tile-laying exploration game with some similarities to Carcassone. Players lay tile along paths, laying claim to lands as they come their way. The winner is the player with the most land influenced. 

 

 

While there have been many times I've enjoyed this simple game, it drove me absolutely bonkers that day. There is an element of luck. First you chose your path, then you pick up your tile. If your tile doesn't fit, well, too bad. Turn over. Put it in front of you and if you can use it later, do so, otherwise you're negative points at the end of the game. After I had 4+ tiles in front of me I was so obviously behind that each turn became a frustration. Blah! 

 

I think we can safely let this one go. 

 

However, I must have tile-laying island exploration games on the mind because look what I got dh for our anniversary. (Shh, he doesn't know yet!)

 

 

Similar, huh? At least Akrotiri gets better ratings. I think there's less luck and maybe a bit more pick up and deliver. I'll have to let you know. 

[What's the funniest thing your children thought you (or your spouse) did?]

Me, 5: We have to tell our teacher what work our Daddy does. 

My mom: He's an auditor. 

Me: Auctioner

Mom: NO, AUD-ih-TER. That means he checks the math people do for their money. But DON'T say he's an accountant. He's NOT an accountant. 

 

 

Teacher: Honey, it's okay if you don't know what your dad does. 

Me: I DO know what he does.

*several more minutes go by*

Teacher: What does he work with? Is he a truck driver? 

Me: NO. And he's not an accountant. But he works with money. And it starts with A. Add-er?

Teacher: Are you sure he's not an accountant?

Me: HE'S NOT AN ACCOUNTANT! 

 

I'm not sure what the big deal was with the accountant thing. I'm pretty sure they wrote BOOKKEEPER on the poster so drilling a 5 year old to say Auditor was kind of pointless. I wanted them to write A Money Guy but they wouldn't listen to me. It was all I could do to keep them from writing ACCOUNTANT, whatever that was. Something about counting, probably. If he liked adding, I don't know what his problem with counting was. 

 

 

[Dumb people who like to argue who comment on news stories]

I was reading about a study someone did on people that respond in the comment section on the Internet. There's a correlation between traits like sadism, Machiavellism, other sociopathy and trolling. It's not that there are a lot of those people but they spend a greater amount of time indulging their needs to hurt in a "socially acceptable" (not direct and won't come back to hurt them) way. Narcissists were also included in this group, but Narcissists don't spend the time the others do. The greatest correlation was between sadists and Internet trolling. It's a safe way for them to vent their personalities. 

[I Just Played...2015 edition]

I'm sorry Colosseum didn't go so well. I'm glad you shared even though I can't 'like' that you missed the library. 

[Reining in negative thoughts about your child's potential medical diagnosis]

It is hard. I think it can be dangerous to pretend that its not. One thing I try to do is remind myself that it's okay to be sad. I'll have a good cry if I need it, then make a list or schedule and keep busy with the things I can do. Bottled emotion is the most dangerous. Prepare for the future if that gives you peace. Plan and do special things as a family. Do things you love together. Celebrate your child and your family. 

 

Exercise. Eat well. Get enough sleep. Take care of yourself. If you have a craft or art, consider taking it up again...or learn a new one. When your mind is racing it helps to have a handcraft that uses repetition (knitting/sewing/painting/scrapbooking) but also takes up some mind space to plan, remember, create. Because while emotion (sadness, anger, fear) is okay and transitory and a part of being human and having connections with people, playing the Worry Tape over and over and over in your head 24/7 can suck all the joy out of your life and all the people around you. Keep it simple right now. Focus on the little joys and contentments. Do what you can do. 

 

:grouphug:  I hope the time goes quickly and your child is well. If not, the world does not end. It gets harder, but the love and fun are still there. If nothing else you grab hold of it that much harder. You learn to love the little things. Your child is always your child. 

[I Just Played...2015 edition]

This weekend we played Container. 

 

 

Container is a strategic economic game where players produce, buy, store, and auction off shipping containers. The goal is to buy the most valuable containers (for you...everyone has a goal card which makes different colors worth different amounts in the final accounts) and in this way make the most money by the end of the game. 

 

 

The game forces players to trade by only allowing them to buy goods from others, you can't sell to your own ships or warehouses. What happens is a complex series of money changing hands, complex enough that you often forget how much money you've put into a product in order to get the colors you want out there. You may produce an orange container. You set the price and Player B buys it from you and puts it in his wharf warehouses (setting the price again). Player C can dock his container ship and buy it if the price is right. When anyone is ready they can take their ship to the island and the remaining players bid for it. If the ship's owner doesn't like the bid he can pay an equal cost to the highest bid and keep it himself. Players work these auctions and sales in order to buy the containers which are worth the most to them. 

 

Fun. More fun than I would have thought from an economic game. I liked moving the sturdy ships around collecting containers for sale. DS14 loved it and I thought it gave him a realistic picture of trade. DS also developed a simple system to see if he was making his money back from different investments. He won. :) By the time I figured out that quantity could be more helpful than quality he had more than a dozen containers on his island zone. 

 

Heavier than we usually play (90m) and out of print (I think) so more expensive. DH traded it with some guy over the winter for our old copy of Dune. 

 

 

[Book a Week 2015: W16 - Sonnets]

eta:

Oh wait, I just remembered that it is NOT in second person, but first person PLURAL.

 

Well, that's very different.

 

Never mind

 

Which? Anthem?

 

I was thinking the 2nd person novel sounds like something Faulkner would do. Tom Robbins? I think he has one like that (not Only Cowgirls Get the Blues...one of the other ones). 

 

Doesn't Camus have one that starts off in a long 2nd person address but is really a 1st person novel? The Fall maybe?

[Book a Week 2015: W16 - Sonnets]

 

When I consider how my light is spent By John Milton

When I consider how my light is spent,

   Ere half my days, in this dark world and wide,

   And that one Talent which is death to hide

   Lodged with me useless, though my Soul more bent

To serve therewith my Maker, and present

   My true account, lest he returning chide;

   â€œDoth God exact day-labour, light denied?â€

   I fondly ask. But patience, to prevent

That murmur, soon replies, “God doth not need

   Either man’s work or his own gifts; who best

   Bear his mild yoke, they serve him best. His state

Is Kingly. Thousands at his bidding speed

   And post o’er Land and Ocean without rest:

   They also serve who only stand and wait.â€

 

 

I love that Milton! I don't remember what I thought of it when I read it first in college, but I read it a few years ago and I found it deeply moving. It gives me patience. 

 

 

I'm not doing much reading. I finished The Moon-Spinners and it was okay. Very fast-paced but the romance made me roll my eyes. I did enjoy her vocabulary and description. Statistics Without Tears was succinct but very dense. I had to force myself through a lot of it. I did enjoy his use of logic to make people think through the implications. 

 

I'm still reading The Innovators to dh in the car and really enjoying it. That's the one on the history of digital computers from Babbage and Lovelace through the Internet. It's all about the engineers, the inventors, the visionaries, and the dreamers. Dh is reading Charles Portis' short stories to me from Escape Velocity in bed at night. Portis' humor is so perfectly backhanded and subtle. I'm looking forward to this collection because some of his novels wander bemusedly and short stories have to stay sharp. 

 

 

 

I'm trying to chose between Prudence (Carriger, came through ILL, so far not as charming as the other series), something by Novalis (Hymn to the Night? or something), some poetry by Jorie Graham (Dream of the Unified Field, I think), and a children's book called Shoebag about a cockroach who turns into a boy, kind of a Metamorphosis turned on its head for the mid-elementary set. 

 

Shoebag, right? That's the kind of mood I'm in. 

[Has anyone STOPPED using the library?]

 

If an email reminder system might be helpful but your library doesn't have one, see if they are a part of LibraryElf.com .  It was easy to sign up, free, and you choose your own reminder options.  I get both email and text reminders each day beginning three days before items are due.  Pretty sure I heard about it here several years ago!

 

In general, if anyone has a particularly outrageous library bill, you might try approaching your library director and asking for leniency.  Be prepared to pay it that day.  In the library where I worked, I went to bat for a couple of special patrons (homeschoolers), and their fines were cut in half.  But it was a one-time deal for each of them.

 

This bears repeating. 

 

A lot of library systems have electronic reminder systems now. Before dumping the library I would find out if they had something like that available. Check out their website or ask at the desk. I can order a book online, get an email reminder to return it 2 days before it's due and another 2 days after, and renew the book online (if no one else wants it...2 renewals max.). If the book is renewed within 5 days of its due date there are no late fees. 

 

Depending on the culture of the library, quite a few will cut you some slack periodically, especially if you are a 'Power User.' Most homeschoolers fall into this category. Not every one will, but it's worth exploring if money is tight. (We usually call Library Fees 'tipping' in our house...as in "I tipped your account at the library today." We love our library and consider it a donation to a good cause, not an irritation.) 

 

 

 

If your library does not have an up-to-date reminder system or a people-centered culture, then perhaps you're right to move on. Not all things work for all people. 

[I don't have anyone IRL that I can talk to about this]

Sometimes when we've had bad news for people for awhile or been the 'needy family' it is hard to share things with people. It's awkward. It's hard to know how much to say. We don't want to experience that awkwardness when people don't know what to do or say around tragedy. It even takes time for us to process personally so it can be really hard to talk about in a casual conversation. 

 

Feel free to be extremely vague. Something on the order of "ds is doing better, thanks for asking, but we have other things going on right now. Please keep us in prayer/I'm can't really talk about right now/etc. We've really appreciated your support" and move on. 

 

I'm not a very good liar but I don't really like to talk about our medical problems ad nauseam. I notice "we're as well as can be expected right now" and end with something a bit more upbeat they might be interested in such as your son's recovery or another child's triumph. Most people will move on. 

 

:grouphug:  Of course, do what works for you. Just know you're not alone. Life can be pretty cruddy sometimes. 

[Burn out vs. depression]

Lots of good information here. 

 

I don't have definitions for you, but I do know that burnout can be a reason to seek help, especially if you can't (for whatever reason) recharge, organize, or change your life to acquire more balance. Therapy can help you find ways to improve your life and promote balance. Medication can eliminate some of the anxiety so you can make changes in your life. Once you bring things back in balance burnout tends to disappear. From what I understand clinical depression can be different. Therapy can help, but sometimes you're correcting years of chemical and life unbalance. It's a bit more complex. 

 

I wish you the best. Whatever you're facing, it's important that you pay attention to your needs. 

[Book a Week 2015 - W14: April Alliteration]

Speaking of The Zookeeper's Wife, there was a Yahoo news article yesterday about exhibiting the couples' home in memorial of what they did. A few pictures included for those who read the book or are otherwise curious and an interview with one of the men who hid there. 

[Book a Week 2015 - W14: April Alliteration]

I'm in a town in coastal northern California and have found heaven in a single block! Not one but 2 used book stores, a fabric shop, a knitting shop AND a custom chocolate and coffee shop. Oh and a kitschy vintage dress shop with dress patterns and knick knacks from the 50s and 60s. All in one block!!!!! Be still my heart!!

 

I wonder if you're in Eureka or Arcata. I've been listening to a knitting podcast from 2 women who work at the university there called Teaching Your Brain to Knit. Part of it is about brain science and knitting and part of it is about "the Redwood curtain," ie gorgeous northern California. 

[Pull Out Cutting Boards]

I'm not sure how tall you all are or how low your counters are that these are too low? I'm 5'10 and the pull outs are only two inches below counter level. My house was built in 1960 so I don't think the counters are unusually tall. The difference between cutting something on the counter (unless you have a butcher block on top of the counter) and doing it on a pull out is negligable. I say that as a tall woman. Maybe I'm just used to everything being low? ;)

 

 

[Book a Week 2015 - W14: April Alliteration]

Well, since I'm (still) not reading, I figured I'd post the book that ds just finished & really enjoyed: The Girl Who Saved the King of Sweden by Jonas Jonasson. Ds read Jonasson's other book, The 100-Year-Old Man Who Climbed Out the Window and Disappeared, quite a few months ago. He really liked The 100-Year-Old Man & said he liked this one even more.

 

They're reading The 100-Year-Old Man on WPR's Chapter a Day (kind of a Read-aloud serial). Amusing. 

 

(Ready Player One) Hmm. This is sitting on our shelves because DH loves it and refuses to donate it. I'll try to read it in the next few months even though I'm not a fan of dystopian novels. 

 

Once they establish that it is a dystopian world they move on. It's not relentlessly dystopian. Most of the novel is spent in the virtual world because the characters prefer it to the real world. Probably one of the more cheerful dystopian novel you can read. The dystopia just creates character motivation and tension. 

 

 

The author felt obligated to explain in great detail the history, habits, and biological classification of every single animal and insect that was mentioned. She describes all the people with the same attention to detail (including mannerisms and sometimes even eating habits, as if they were zoo members as well). The way she links the Holocaust and the treatment of the animals by the Nazis during that time was...interesting. I am not so sure the Nazis gave as much thought to animals as she credits them with doing.

 

 

I didn't really see that as a main focus of the novel, but that was interesting. I saw it more as a thematic parallel between the way some Nazis thought of animal breeding and evolution and the chilling way they considered human beings. It's an interesting abstract comparing how a society acts and what it's beliefs are.  In the end, mostly I saw the book as a hymn to the Polish people, especially the underground. They did much, suffered much, and they were let down by the West again and again before and after WWII. 

 

So dense in detail though. You're right. I had to push myself through it sometimes because she had so many stories and themes in mind and her detail wasn't always useful to the narrative itself. It was more like a central story grabbed her interest but then her interests revolved around that story pulling in tons of detail (which sometimes we found as interesting as she did and sometimes we didn't). Narrative tornado. 

[Ever taken too much mucinex or anti-histamine?]

Did it have pseudoephedrine in it? The reason I ask is that it's often paired with guaifenisen. 

 

DH gave me Sudafed (which has both) earlier this year and that was a mistake. Heart running. Anxiety. Dizziness. Headache. Inability to sleep. That stuff is crazy (for me). 

[Pull Out Cutting Boards]

I have 2. One is huge (something like 2 drawers long and counter deep) and in an awkward spot. I don't usually use it. That's a little too big. It tilts a little. One of my kids likes to eat on it because it's right next to the refrigerator. It's like another counter space when everything else is messy.

 

The other one is a drawer wide and counter deep. It's right by the stove and I love it. It has great balance (no way you need to pull all of that out) and you can chop while you're cooking. I even pull it out and use it on the counter to roll out pizza or pie crust. Love it. Use it daily. 

 

It gets washed the way you wash anything. It pulls all the way out and you take it to the sink or you can pull it out a little farther and wash it right there. We like wood cutting boards here.  

 

It has two downsides. One is if some thoughtless person closes the board to get into the drawer below it. :P It doesn't touch on the inside but there's nothing like finding that mess later. The other is that you don't want to cut anything wet on there. It's too easy to move the board and have liquid trickle onto the floor. I consider mine my go-to veggie slicing and baking board, so I really don't want to cut meat on it anyway. We have a separate board just for meat.