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Krista in LA

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Posts posted by Krista in LA

  1. I think to some degree people are upset that there is perceived nonchalance about the innocent collateral damage that is going to occur. I get that, but there is no way for it to be avoided.

     

    I was thinking about this tonight and realized there is another dynamic going on. Many times in abusive families (lets say incest or molestation) when the victim comes forward, many members of their family will outright deny what happened or subtly blame the victim for causing the family shame. The victim did not cause their shame, but the family is not ready or willing to face the truth. Even when the perpetrator is charged and convicted the family may continue to blame the victim. "She should have handled this differently." Sometimes they do not blame the victim, but they cannot bring themselves to condemn the perpetrator. It is horrible and messy.

     

    What happens when this occurs on a community level? A community is like a big family. Especially when it is focused around a unifying element. This community has been through hell, they thought it was wrapped up in the Sandusky trial and other college employees, but then their world publically exploded again with Freeh report (last week) then this week (which is really rapid in these terms) statues have been ripped down, wins rescinded, various other sanctions from the NCAA and "hits" to this community's (family's) unity.

     

    I was with my dd at her track club practice tonight, which is held at a prestigious private school. They are doing their final practices before the Junior Olympics. As we were leaving the football team came out and one of the coaches came and made some small talk with me and my younger sons. I looked around and felt a wonderful sense of community and connectedness, but what if that was suddenly ripped away? What if I had years of investment in that community and it was tattered and ripped to shreds in such a public way? It would probably take me quite awhile to come to terms with things.

     

    I would probably fight tooth and nail to try and hold it together. I would be frantic and desperate as I saw more and more of my community being pulled under the tide. I would not be ready to let go.

     

    I think we are seeing that in the PSU community. They know they cannot blame the victims, but to accept the sanctions and Freeh report is a pill that may be to big to swallow all at once. They are going to need time to process this.

     

    Like others I have been frustrated by some of the things I have read, but I have the luxury of distance. This isn't my community so I can look upon the facts without a lot of emotion, but if it was I guarantee you it would take me awhile to be able to accept ALL that had happened.

     

    Maybe I am wrong. :D But, I wanted to share these observations.

     

    :grouphug:

     

    :iagree:I think this is a great observation. I think you might need to add another layer to it though. I think Penn Staters have accepted the sexual abuse of the children by Sandusky and certainly nobody is blaming the victims. The second layer is that you have a man who outsiders view as being idolized by students and alumni, while in reality, he was looked up to as a role model not a deity. Let's think of it as someone who might be a role model in your (general) life like a parent or important person in the community, who has done so many good things and been a great mentor to many young people. You know this person is a good person and wish there were more people like him in the world. Now imagine that all of a sudden you are told he might have known about a child being sexually abused, and didn't do enough about it. How do you reconcile the man you know, who has done so much good, and you have viewed as a role model with the person that the media is telling you he is? You don't know it for a fact, and it doesn't fit with the man you know. That is what Penn Staters are going through and then they are being told they are just as bad for not hating everything that has to do with him or their school. They have to cling to each other because nobody else seems to understand....

  2. The President of Penn State - the current one - seems to 'get' it. He is accepting the Freeh report they commissioned. He is accepting the penalty from the NCAA. He is taking the responsibility that none of the others - Spanier, Curley, Paterno, etc did. Even though he wasn't there at the time.

     

    Actually it's not a matter of him getting it. He's rolling over and playing dead hoping that the publicity nightmare will pass over as quickly as possible.

  3. I thought I already cleaned out my dd's room, but it seems to be accumulating more stuff. She has to be moved out of the room in a couple of weeks so our exchange student can have it, so it is all going to have to go somewhere soon! The kids' bathroom also is on my list for the next couple of days - I can't believe how much stuff has been crammed in the cabinets.

  4. I'm on the other side of the state, so I'm not much help. Just wanted to say welcome to LA! I wasn't thrilled with moving here either, especially coming from Chicago. While I would still jump at the opportunity to move, I really can appreciate the place my kids call home. I had to get to a point of acceptance first though. This state is so different from anywhere else I've ever lived - there is lots to learn and experience.

  5. My kids both homeschooled until high school. For my dd, I signed her up for Classical Conversations in 8th grade to get her used to being in more of a classroom situation, taking notes, and doing assignments for someone other than me. For my ds, I had him take 2 on-line classes to try to accomplish the same thing. My advice is to make sure she's strong in math, reading, and writing. I also suggest testing her every year with ITBS or something similar so she's used to taking a test like that. It might make it easier to sign her up for school if you have those test results as well. My dd never had to write anything in cursive in high school and my ds only knows how to sign his name in cursive. I actually have to go sign my ds up next week for school and I'm hoping it goes as smoothly as when I signed dd up. For her, they asked us to bring the curriculum we used for 8th grade, samples of her work, and test scores since we had them. Once they saw her test scores, they didn't look at anything else but her algebra because she did so well. Once he saw her algebra book was a normal algebra book (Jacobs), he said she could get credit for it by passing the end-of-course exam that the other students have to take, but it was the only course they would consider giving her credit for since the kids who went to public school could not get high school credit for any others. I hope my ds does as well as my dd did!

  6. Atlanta is my dd's favorite place to go.

     

    If you are interested in Civil War things, I highly recommend the Cyclorama - very cool, and it's right next door to the zoo if you are interested in it. I've been to better zoos though...

     

    We also love Coke world. We drank the free samples from around the world until we were nearly sick. The aquarium is right next door to it and it's really nice.

     

    The CNN tour was pretty cool too. There are several museums that were nice like Fernbank Museum of Natural History and the High Museum of Art.

  7. I would imagine that one is perfectly fine. We have the slightly smaller, less expensive http://www.amazon.com/Cuisinart-ICE-20-Automatic-2-Quart-Cream/dp/B00000JGRT/ref=sr_1_3?s=appliances&ie=UTF8&qid=1338780194&sr=1-3 that we like a lot. Very easy to use and best of all, no ice needed. It does mean that you have to plan ahead to make sure the bowl is frozen, but we often just leave it in the freezer so it's always ready. I love homemade ice cream :tongue_smilie:

  8. I don't know if it's any stronger but Veramyst is what works best for me, including my itchy eyes. If your ears are bothering you, try taking some Sudafed to help dry things up. I used to get ear infections every spring from allergies until my db, a PA, recommended the Sudafed in addition to my allergy nasal spray. Just make sure it's the real stuff that you have to sign for at the pharmacy counter and not the stuff on the shelves.

  9. I've never used TT so I can't comment on that specifically. I'm just thinking back when I was in high school, the smarter kids who took algebra I in 8th grade, took algebra II in 9th and geometry in 10th. The kids on the normal math track took algebra I in 9th, geometry in 10th, and algebra II in 11th. My dd goes to public high school and she did algebra I in 8th, and then geometry in 9th and algebra II in 10th. I'm thinking that unless the curriculum is written to be used in a specific order, it probably doesn't matter. Does TT recommend an order for the classes? The only other concern I can think of is when it comes time to take the SAT or ACT, you want to make sure you've covered the appropriate math.

  10. I've had many root canals and many crowns. It sounds like you might need one. When I had a root canal done on a crowned tooth, he was able to just drill through the crown and did a filling on it when he was done. I have never had any pain beyond a little sensitivity immediately after it was done. I have also only had one root canal go bad and it was about 20 years after I had it done - an oral surgeon went through the bottom of the root and fixed it so I didn't even lose the tooth.

  11. I would tell the dentist your limitations and see what he says.

     

    In my mind:

    1. Pain

    2. Non-painful, but will, with certainty, cause big issues. Cavities and such.

    3. Not perfect, and might eventually cause problems.

    4. Cosmetic. I don't negate the importance of this. I am much more confident after straightening my teeth. But it is lowest priority.

     

    :iagree: I had to have a lot of dental work done. I sat down and talked to the dentist to find out what was the most critical to get done. He was a far better judge of that than I was - cosmetic issues could wait. We spaced it out over 3 years, maxing out our insurance each year but not going over what they would pay so as to keep my costs as low as possible. Our dentist also offers interest free financing (through a bank so they do check your credit) which was helpful.

  12. Well for my dd, it nearly doubled to just over $600/6 months so it went up about $50/month. This was on a 2000 Ford Taurus and we insure with State Farm. She got a good student discount, a driver's ed discount, and they gave her a video to watch which got another discount. I asked if there were any other ways to get discounts for her and there weren't. We were able to just cover her on the one car and not have to insure her on our other one, it just means that she can only drive that one. I'm scared of what it's going to be when my ds starts driving in a couple of years.

  13. We decided to send my elder one to school when she got to high school. She had actually been asking about it for a couple of years prior to that, but I managed to put it off. Our student/teacher relationship was going downhill and I could see that she was really needing to spend more time around other kids - she's very social. She had no problem adjusting to high school and I do believe that it was the right decision for all of us. My ds will be starting high school next year. He would be fine if I kept homeschooling him, but I'm kind of ready to be done with homeschooling. I feel comfortable sending him to school and I know it's not a big, bad, evil place. However, if he doesn't do well or decides to come back home, I'm open to that as well.

  14. This is my ds's last year of homeschooling as he is planning on going to high school next year. In trying to get him prepared for having a teacher and assignments that must get completed on time, I signed him up for a couple on-line classes. I highly recommend http://www.captivethoughttutorials.com and her intro to lit class. My ds has loved it! They meet on-line once a week and discuss the reading assignment, do quizzes, tests, a writing assignment once in awhile, and poetry. It has been great for my son and I feel like he's better prepared for school next year. He has learned a lot. If we were going to continue to homeschool, I would sign him up with Captive Thought again next year.

  15. Several years ago, I won my share of $1,000,000 from my credit card at the time. It was one of those deals where if you made a charge during a certain time frame that ended in a particular dollar and cents amount, you won part of the prize provided you called the number to claim it. When they divided the $1M by the number of winners, my share ended up being over $7k before taxes.

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