homeschoolin'mygirls
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Posts posted by homeschoolin'mygirls
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Just for clarification- this is not a relationship ender for me . I just spent 3 days with him in hospital while he was treated for uti. Got him home to rehab yesterday. he calls me 2-3 times daily. I. Dpoke with jim just 20 minutes ago. I am in frequent contact with his doctors and monitor/ manage his medical care. That won’t change
house was appraised at $350-500 at the time of agreement- they put a selling price of $250,000 she is paying $500 a month She jokingly told me that it will take until Dad is 102 to pay it off ( he’s 87 now) at the time of his death, remainder of debt is canceled and that $250,000 covers everything- all building, tractors, shops with expensive equipment and 70 acres land
i have no intention of taking this further. I had trouble believing he planned this because he’s always put a focus on fairness but he clearly stated what he wants done and i will respect that
As recommended by posters, i am going to look into counseling, take time and let myself have the hurt feeling, meditate on peace and continue with my family relationships. Would appreciate good thoughts/ prayers for inner peace and healing about this
something else we’re sharing? Turns out he had covid as well as UTI . Now c/g sister, my mom, and I are all sharing that with him as well 😷😷😁
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Wow-thank you for the feedback. I will do my best to address points brought up.
i tried to quote and totally messes that up. Please bear with me if formati g is messed up.
My parents are 87 and 85. They need care now. My dad had a major stroke in December. he is in a SNU rehab and will be discharging home around first of MayMy other sister- not inheriting one- is their full time caregiver and receives a generous salary for that from my parents. And, believe me, she earns every penny of it. I helped set that up and do not begrudge a penny of it. I wish the estate could pay her more.
C/G sister provides prob 85% of care. I provide a lot of the other and inheriting sister has been taking every other weekend for last two months although she does say she can’t continue with that. I took 2 months FMLA when he had the stroke and was there to help.
i am a nurse and am well aware of the medicaid issue. The house and land are considered homestead. We are working to get other assets out of their name.
“I hope you can find a way to accept this and move on. It is very unfair. I do wonder if your parents realize all their assets will go to one child and not the other four. I might also let the other three know, but that's just me. “This. When one of my sibling brought this up to me, I reassured them that somehow it was an oversight and that my sister and father did not realize the disparity. I was wrong on both counts.
My solution/ suggestion was that inheriting sister get the house and ten acres around it as well as all shops, cars, stuff on that land. The other 60 acres could be sold as a unit and divided evenly between other 4 kids. She would still be getting bulk of estate- house valued for around 400,000 , 10 acres land is at lowest value around $70,000, plus tractors, cars, shops with expensive tools, oil and mineral rights. That would work out where other kids would get aprx $100,000 each.The answer from both of them was a resounding no.
i never really expected to get much from them and this hit me hard in unexpected ways emotionally. My life is full and complete without an extra $100,000. Its the inner turmoil that is causing me griefIt just hurts, you know? I just feel so devalued
SKL Not sure how to say this gently ... but ... if you feel like your dad's value for you is what's in his will ... he may get the impression that your value for him depends on what's in his will
This is an excellent point and i am going to think more on it i have only had the one discussion with him, mostly because I didn't believe he intentionally chose this i do not plan to talk any further about it when all is said and done, it is his right to dispose of as he chooses and i respect that
i’m not interested in fighting his choices or contesting the will. I’m trying to find a way to let it go. I know with my brain that how he gifts the inheritance doesnt equate jow he love us but it’s so hard to feel that it isn’t a slap in the face and a measure of his disregard for me and my other siblings
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Coming out of lurkland to ask. Foe feedback on troubling issue to me. Longtime poster here( proud-winner twice back in the day when we waited for board yo flip)
i am one of 5 children —all adult, youngest 50 years old. Around 10 years ago my parents announced intention to sell house. My sister wanted to buy it and they entered an agreement for her to buy it with intention for her to buy out other children shares at my parents’ deaths.
Fast forward to today and will reads : house and property becomes hers at time of deaths. No payout of shares to other kids
She has paid aprx $70,000 to my parents as of now. My parents lowballed selling price to her at $250,000The property with 70 acres of land, house, other buildings is valued at least half million dollars with cars, tools, shop equipment, it’s probably even more
So she’s getting inheritance of well over half million dollars for around 70-100 thousand while the other 4 children get nothing. One brother is getting 2 heirloom guns. My parents are in ill- health and their cash reserves are dwindling
I talked with my dad cause i thought this had to be a mistake- it’s not. He has always preached fair play in the will it even says to be kind to each other
He recognizes the disparity but since shes buying it for $100,000 or so ( currently at 70,000) he feels it should all be hers and she is fiercely defending her right to all of
Once i determined that my father’s choice to give entire inheritance to her was intentional, discussion was over. It feels like a slap in the face, a devaluing of my worth to them Don’t I matter is what my heart is crying out?
Help me out, my friends How can I make peace with this and move on?
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Maybe email her with directions so she can bring beef to you? And stay and prepare dish?
Just kidding , of course. I suspect you wouldnt enjoy time with her. What a totally rude response.
( and i saved your salad recipe to make-- it sounds delish)
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I was at Braums the other day. ( ice cream/casual food/ market).
This guy came in with a huge beautiful parrot on his shoulder. NOT potty trained. Ewww
Service animal
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Thank you everyone. Melissa & Doug teaset and cupcakes win out!
You guys are the best!
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Ok, in reality it's more for the mom that believes other child in family ( cousin) is favored one. Not true but that is what she believes...
Would like something that would please her mom but not kill me in expense. Birthday girl is delightful active 2 yr old. Mom likes girly things for her. Likes to do little ones make up and nails for fun
Any ideas appreciated
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Just because a hospital has jobs posted does not mean that the hospital is actively trying to fill those positions
And I am appalled at the derogatory comments about the male attendant 's educational status
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When I was showing my Brownie uniform on ebay to my daughters--- and it was listed vintage! 😳😳😱
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[quote name="dirty ethel rackham" post="6871329" timestamp=
Is there any way you can get some help? You need a mental and physical break. Perhaps when your dh is getting better, you can have a frank discussion with him about the food issue ... About what you will make and what you will not. And that complaining about food lovingly prepared is not OK.
Sent from my SM-G900T using Tapatalk
This.
Best advice ever.
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People have claimed it cures acid reflux. Noooo... Not only does it not cure acid reflux it is an awful thing to attempt to drink when you have acid reflux.
If only it were all that simple.
Plus-- I've treated people in hospital with GI bleeds from acidic irritation from too much/too long treatment
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When I was a child an Event happened with my step grandfather. My bio grandmother found out and blamed/shamed me for what happened. For years I felt unclean and believed that I had somehow asked for it.Angelica, not to add to your woes, but I'd be very leery to leave your MIL alone with your son either. Who knows what she will say to him about this. I would be afraid she would try and tell him it didn't happen, he doesn't remember, etc.
I think she felt she had to make sure I was so traumatized/ashamed/terrified that I wouldn't dare say anything...to anyone. It worked. (For a long time anyways)
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A PTA is a great job to look at. Because of the required doctorate now for entry-level PTs ( existing PTs are being grandfathered in), the growth potential in this field is huge. Average salary in texas is listed around 55k but I know many that make quite a bit more. And many universities have specialized programs for PTAs to continue for their PT degree
i think this could be a great career shift if this is an area your husband is interested in
A word of caution if you don't mind-- be Oh-so-careful!! Of for profit schools. I don't know if that's the direction you're looking but if so i'd advance with all due caution. I've seen many nursing and other health care workers get totally burned by these types of schools
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Hi
Dallas RN here with dtr in OT school, which also calls for obs hours.
She needs to call NOW to set this up-- it may be a bit difficult this late but it could still work
Call hospital and rehab centers-- ask for therapy dept and explain she needs obs hours for ST. They get calls like this all the ytime; they'll know what she's talking about. Don't forget that many skilled nursing facilities also do rehab therapies.
Good luck!
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My husband has done this as a retirement activity. We're hoping it might turn lucrative at some point.
He has a MBA and had to take futher courses as well as an internship time period. Right now he mediates/arbitrates 2-4 cases a month at the courthouse as a volunteer. He is meeting people and hoping to transisiton to paid work soon.
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Revise wording to fit your personality but maybe these will help some
Gosh-you know sometimes I think that too. But then when I look back I realize that in 11 hours I worked hard -and look at what I did accomplish. I did --x,y, z.....
You know, coworker did leave me a list of things that didn't get done during the week. I'm happy to help. Why don't you and I go over the lists/task and you tell me what you see as the most important/needing to get done first?
Always works like that , doesn't it. We never get everything done we want. Coworker told me the extra things she wants done. Why don't you tell me the things you want done outside of my normal activities?
I feel *weird, sad, strange,___insert feeling word of choice, no angry or defensive words* to hear you say that. My job is important to me and I try to do my very best at it.
I know, right? Isn't it funny how different it looks to people not doing it. I never knew coworker did so much until she told me. I expect she doesn't really know how much i do, either.
**if you can add an example client can relate to it helps. exa--You know, it's like how people say "oh just do your exercises 3 times a day. They have no how much work it is and how painful it is for you**
I am a RN with home health experience. The above may or may not help depending on your client's disabilities.
Sounds like to me coworker has formed an- manipulative emotional bond between her and client that gives her some authority. And uses that bond to make sure that noone else gets close to client and threatens her authority.
Unfortunately all too common in home care situations. Stay detached emotionally if possible. Stay objective when talking with client and coworker. Do not talk negative about coworker. Do not let them engage you in drama-it only escalates it.
And get out as soon as possible. I highly doubt this situation is fixable because your coworker has unofficial authority that the client acknowledges by his actions, if not in words.
Good luck
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Let me clarify that confusing sentence--
Mom feels dd's behavior is going to push Mom to the point where Mom will hurt dd
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A woman I work with is very frustrated with her 13 y/o dd. She seems to take all of her daughter's behavior very personally and feels the daughter is deliberately trying to hurt her.
Today she was telling me about the latest incident and she was shaking. Literally crying and shaking, saying that dd is going to make her(mom) hurt her(dd) if dd doesn't stop her behaviors. She then would calm down but still be very angry sounding and say she was going to send dd to a girls school.
I don't believe there's any abuse--yet. I also don't think a 13 y/o is going to be able to change her behavior as quickly-if at all. So I know tension is going to rise.
I've talked with her. Fortunately, she and I have a fairly good relationship and she is willing to take guidance from me.
Anybody have suggestions? Books? (She is a Christian so religious is ok)
Nan
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my sister--on a lean budget--is giving out movie baskets to her extended family. She would like to have diff kinds of popcorn to put in basket? Any ideas?
Also anybody got ideas about places to find good movies inexpensively
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We have 3--yes, 3. Don't get me started on that story.
Lovely personalities--very gentle with kids.
Troubling issue- gentle feedback please
in The Chat Board
Posted · Edited by homeschoolin'mygirls
Spelling/clarity
The plan at This moment that the house and properties will be inheriting sisters when both parents are gone. There is talk now of escalating that process and just transferring ownership now.
initially, inheriting sister was to buy out other siblings shares. Somehow that changed and is no longer part of the will.
My other siblings are not happy with this. Several siblings are dealing with by removing valuable tools and machinery from the estate.
I am not doing that or planning to act against my parents wishes My father made it clear in the discussion we had that it is an intentional choice and , as hurtful as it is, that is his right.
An interesting terminology that fits me, and seems as if it might fit you, is the “curse of competence” I doubt if i even have to explain it. My parents also did the restaurant pay for everyone but my family, gave homemade desks freely as a gift to other siblings but charged me “ you can afford it” or left me out of gifting of money or time “ you dont really need it”.
lots of soul searching going on here and actively striving to find peace with this. Thank you for your prayers