HRAAB
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Posts posted by HRAAB
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Chinese or tamales while I lay around in pajamas reading my new book, playing games, and working on a puzzle.
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I picked up bathrobes and slippers for my girls when I was in there the other day. They were a good price so I hope they hold up. Thanks for the tip on the gel pens and coloring books. We all love to color in the evening.
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I know this was a JAWM, but you are not a jerk in any way.
Our neighbors grandson used to come over to play with my girls. For several reasons (mainly feelings), I was never completely comfortable with him and would keep a close eye on him. Fast forward 10 years, and I just found out he molested his little sisters. He's back living with his grandparents until his court date. Now I have no bad feelings about saying he isn't allowed on our property.
Sometimes our feelings are wrong but better safe than sorry.
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That is wonderful news.
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My dd likes to use colored pens to take notes and has asked for more for Christmas. The last couple times I bought pens, they tended to break - the clicky thing on the retractable pens. I think they were Paper Mate. She likes the retractable ones because she can use them one-handed. Any suggestions for good ones that don't break quickly?
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Which abilities besides bearing and nursing children are truly unique to women? What abilities are truly unique to men?
I knew someone would ask that. I admit emotions are involved in how I feel about this issue so I'm not working completely on logic, if I ever do. Primarily, for women bearing and nursing children is what I'm thinking of in this instance. Men have greater body strength, generally (I've never met a man who wasn't stronger than me unless he was very old) although that wouldn't apply to many jobs in the military outside of combat, and I do understand that is also changing. Other than that, any other differences I see are only anecdotal and from personal experience so I won't go there, but I do think there are certain areas where either men or women are better suited, generally, not always. Just personal observation over the years. By the way, I used to adamantly believe men and women were absolutely equal given the same opportunities. As I've gotten older, I see it somewhat differently. Differences are wonderful and should be respected, and this is not limited to differences between genders. Just as much as I see general differences between men and women, I feel just as strongly about men and women being stereotyped by their gender. I've probably talked myself into a corner.
On the one hand, women have been held back because they have the ability to bear children (whether they choose to or not) and are, usually, physically weaker. On the other hand, if a woman wants and chooses to be feminine, a mother, maternal, that can hold her back. Maternity leave with pay, job security, accommodations for breastfeeding are a few issues. Leveling the playing field doesn't work because we aren't the same. After my first two were born, I proposed to my manager that I work from home two days a week and come into the office the other days. There was nothing in my job that couldn't be done from home. The answer I got was no one else had ever asked for that type of special treatment (they were mostly men), and that I could expect the same treatment they got. Level playing field, right? I was asking for a special accommodation because of my gender (I was nursing the baby at the time, too). I ended up quitting and losing over half our family income and they lost a good employee. The same treatment didn't work. I suspect now (20 years later) I would likely get a different answer.
I don't feel able to express myself very well about this. It goes far beyond selective service, the draft, or the military. So, just my opinion.
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Then why expand it?
If a government had a list mandating people had to sign up to potentially be called to worship dancing bacon, it would be a reasonable presumption that government had an expectation that at some point it might be necessary to use the list.
If the government didn't use it for a long time and then said they were expanding it, it would be a reasonable presumption that they still expect to use the list and also that they expect to use the additions on the list.
If this were genuinely a question of BOTH equality and no likelihood of a draft, then it seems entirely reasonable that rather than expand it, they would do away with selective service entirely.
My dh turned 18 in the brief window between 1975 and 1980??? when there was no registration for selective service. I do not understand why we still have it. Like I said, I'm not losing any sleep over it, but I wish it would go away.
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I never said that.
What I said was stereotypical feminine behaviors don't tend to be celebrated among many feminists. Many would like to see the pressures to conform to that ideal be done away with. Not so much that they want to turn them into men, but that certain characteristics more often attributed to men are seen as more ideal.
If feminists cared so much about traditional issues facing women, then why have many feminist groups historically rejected to push for things that would help women facing issues more women than men face? Such as affordable or free childcare? Or protections from being discriminated against for being pregnant? Etc. Traditionally they have said we can't ask for "extra" if we want to be treated as equals. My argument is if women are to be treated as equal then they need to have a more level playing field. That isn't going to be the case if women choose to have children and there continues to be no protections in place.
Exactly.
And I'm not very worried about my girls being drafted. It's not going to keep me awake at night.
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I have my own ideas about feminism means to me personally. Of course equal pay and opportunities, but feminism for me also means more. I want to see women honored and respected for their unique abilities just as men should be honored and respected for their unique abilities. For instance, I think motherhood should be honored and respected, and no, I don't think it is in this country. I'm not sure how any of this would work out in reality, but I think women should be compensated somehow - tax credit - for staying home to raise children. The job of raising responsible citizens is huge, and our country benefits from this. Instead, making that choice hurts people financially. On the other hand, I fully support women choosing to work in whatever career they choose, including the military. Now this is probably where my sexist side comes out, but because women carry, give birth to, and nurse babies, I just can't get on board with them being forced into the military. They want to volunteer, then go for it. I don't want women held back, but honored for their unique abilities. Is this special treatment? Sure, I guess it is, but I'm not opposed to men receiving special treatment in unique situation either. Feminism for me isn't about being equal, but receiving respect and honor for our unique and different abilities. I suspect many disagree.
Also, I don't believe in past wars that women didn't share in the responsibility or that men shouldered the burden alone. I'm old enough to have parents that were adults during WWII. The women that were still here had a huge responsibility in helping the war effort. It took the men who were sent overseas and the women still at home to win the war. My mil was left alone with a small child and the responsibility of working, paying bills, and paying the mortgage. My aunt was an army nurse and stationed at Pearl Harbor when we were attacked. My other aunt, with two children, worked in some sort of a factory (munitions??) in California while he dh was in the navy. I can't imagine what men in combat went through, but I don't know that the women left home had it much easier. They kept things running plus the worry about dhs, sons, brothers.
Two things I want to make clear: I do not support a draft for anyone, male or female, and I support any woman (or gay, transgendered person) who wants to be part of the military having the right to do so with no obstacles blocking their way based on gender or sexual orientation. Voluntarily.
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I wouldn't at the age of 17 unless there are potentially serious problem, which doesn't seem to be the case. I know my girls' passwords; they shared them with me without me having to ask. I did know my middle dd's passwords when she was younger, but about a year ago she had to change it. I didn't ask, and she didn't offer. She was 17 at the time.
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I'm sorry for your loss.
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I agree. I'm also opposed to the draft. For anyone.So now they are considering making selective service a requirement for women too.
I'm rather ardently against that.
Does anyone else have opinions or whatever about it?
I'm not against women CHOOSING to serve presuming they can meet the same requirements of the men.
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Flank steak inexpensive. Excuse me while I laugh. I like flank steak but don't get it too often because inexpensive it is not.
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Because of situations like that loser in the picture stalking a Muslim woman. (Also, at a bare minimum, I'm thinking open carry has got to mean no covering your face. Geez.)
I understand that she wouldn't be as frightened or nervous if the weapon was concealed, but would she be any safer? Personally, I don't think it looks very civilized to see people walking around malls, stores, downtown areas carrying weapons, but other than how I perceive the looks of it, does it have a bearing on safety? Why is concealed carry preferable? Because it doesn't look/feel as threatening because you can't see the threat?
I just find it hard to believe that a person can mask their face and open carry. Boggles my mind.
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Open carry of handguns becomes legal in Texas at the beginning of the year. I'm not a fan, neither is my dh who has his concealed and carry license. We both think it's a stupid law that shouldn't have been passed. No one I've talked to plans on taking advantage of the law. I did see one man open carrying a handgun at Kroger about a month ago. It did make me nervous and squicky feeling and it had nothing to do with his skin color. I would have felt the same way about anyone open carrying. I think the entire idea is appalling.
I also think it's stupid to be able to open carry rifles and shotguns which has been legal in Texas for a while as evidenced by that horrific picture in the OP. I wish others had stood in front of those idiots creating a safe area for those entering the mosque to walk. Similar to how people would try to drown out the voices of the Westboro Baptist folks. I go out of my way to talk to and be over the top friendly to the Muslim people I see as we are out and about in the Houston area. I want them to know that not everyone is like those idiots in Irving.
Why are you not a fan of open carry but concealed weapons are okay? I don't understand. Does open carry cause more panic? I know seeing weapons on a person makes me really nervous. On the other hand, at least I know who has a gun. Concealing one seems less honest. We don't own any handguns and really aren't into guns so there is a lot about guns I don't understand.
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This makes no damn sense.
Are you saying I don't really hold to a middle ground position?
Or are you saying there is not a middle ground at all?
I do not own guns even though I do think gun ownership is a right.
I too am for more gun restrictions, tho I may or may not agree with all of the ones you do.
But hey. If you think I'm a liar or you think there is no middle ground, then there's zero point to discussing this at all.
This is what worries me about many issues in our country today. It's one extreme or another. In this case no one owns guns except LEO/military or every citizen of legal age owns a gun. If these extremes can't start working towards a middle ground, we're screwed. It seems most people on this thread support gun ownership and most of those would support stricter gun laws. Right there is a middle ground. In this case, I'm firmly in the middle somewhere between the two extremes.
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I am so sorry. :grouphug: :grouphug:
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If this were my child (my children don't have emotional issues) I would expect to work for the person from whom she stole, or to work and repay the person for what was stolen. Also, I would ask her to write a letter of apology. I don't believe you can make someone apologize so I don't know how far I would push that. But, definitely, work. Sitting alone doesn't sound very productive. Also, in this case, counseling is needed.
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I think it obviously depends on the person...but yes, they can (in my state) have a gun like this.
I remember being in line at the Target pharmacy to pick up some meds. The gun in front of me had two holsters, with a handgun in each. It made me and the kids really uncomfortable. I also wonder how safe it was because it would seem that somebody else could have easily grabbed one of the guns. I'm assuming they were loaded.
In Walmart one time my dd was poking me like crazy. There was a man looking over the produce that a big gun of some type over his shoulder. My dd was wondering if we could report him. As far as I know, it's legal. We quickly made our way to another part of the store. He was white. I mention that because of your poll.
My nephew, a young black man, loves guns and has numerous ones. He likes big ones; well, ones that look big to me. He is in law enforcement. If I saw him with one, I wouldn't necessarily like it, but I wouldn't be at all nervous. I know him personally. That makes a huge difference.
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Seeing anyone with a gun strapped to them makes me head in the opposite direction. Armed men/women in a group would make me way more nervous than one man/woman with a weapon. I would get out of there pronto.
Yes, I am afraid of guns. In my life I've known of too many people who have died from accidental gun shots, three under the age of 18.
I didn't answer your poll because honestly it makes me very uncomfortable with myself. I'm going to give this some thought.
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Why are the folks in Europe less evil than we are?
I'm with Arctic Mama in that I want to understand what is in the hearts and minds of people who kill. And then why are there fewer people with these evil intentions in their hearts in Europe. I believe people are people, but people can be hugely influenced by the culture they live in. What is the difference between American and European culture? In this particular discussion, one thing that jumps out is America's long history of gun ownership. How much has our gun culture impacted our tendency to violence?
I'm not saying I believe that, but I am really curious why we have so many more 'violent hearts' in America. If hearts are just as violent in Europe, why aren't there more killings? With knives, bombs, whatever. There must be a lot of frustrated wannabe killers in Europe.
That's what I always end up focusing on after shootings. What makes a person want to kill random people. I'm just sort of mumbling to myself here.
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Windmill?!
That's different.
Yeah. The family was different, too.
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Maybe this is because of selective [anti-free-range] news reporting. Or even the journalists putting the free-range spin on it. Anyone who has been interviewed by a journalist knows that they take a lot of license with "quotes."
Fact is, there are probably a million 4yo kids who have played outside "unsupervised" this year and didn't get on the news. All of their parents weren't "making a statement."
I also think this boy's name played a part in how folks have reacted.
Tomahawk? I noticed that, too. It's a different name, but I don't see how that would cause someone to be more likely to call CPS. Or did you mean how people are reacting to the article?
It reminds me of a boy in my dd's kindergarten class. He was named Windmill.
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It is, and I can't help but wonder if there is more to some of these stories. The kid may have even said something weird that made the neighbors worried. I'm not sure what, but kids can be unpredictable like that.
This is what I always think when I hear these types of stories - there has to be more to it - because it just isn't reasonable otherwise.
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S/O Do you Spend Equally on Each Child for Holiday Gifts?
in The Chat Board
Posted
More or less but mainly I focus on getting them what they want most. I like them to have about the same amount of packages to open, but things aren't always exactly equal must like life. I've never had any complaints.