Jami
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Posts posted by Jami
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Eliana said it so well, I'll just say "ditto". :)
I enjoy the Paltrow/Northam version for its own sake, as a fun "period" movie, the way I enjoy the new Pride and Prejudice or the 90s Mansfield Park. "Based" on the book (the way 'Clueless' is based on Emma ;) ) but not necessarily an adaptation of the book. If that makes sense.
Jami
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Dh had me watch that last night and we both were cracking up! So cute! "The shiny one worries a lot" ROFLOL!
Jami
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You're right, Nan. The cost of seminary seems to necessitate some graduate school type loans or the wife to work full-time to put the husband through, which is how most of my friends did it. LOL. They were all pregnant by May of the last year, my SIL included! I know that Southern in Louisville offers discounts to students who are members of a SBC. I'm not sure Covenant offers the same "deal" to PCA members.
I'm not sure what a good solution is.... It does seem to be unreconcilable with 1 Timothy to rely on gov't aid (not necessarily student loans) while becoming ministers of the gospel.
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And need to be held to standards in 1 Timothy for those who will be shepherds, that if they cannot adequately provide for their family (in general, perhaps not in particular, short-term circumstances) then they are not ready to shepherd other families in ministry. My humble opinion here. If finances are not available for families to attend seminary (speaking generally, not meaning to personally question your situation Aubrey), then is that perhaps not a reason to think it's not a wise choice? Is debt or relying on the government more "okay" than not pursuing ministry or temporarily limiting or spacing children?
The Apostle Paul does counsel men not to marry in Corinthians because of the "present crisis", which would have been extreme persecution, famine, etc. While this was an extreme situation, I think principles can be extrapolated. That if there is danger, an inability to provide physically for family needs, extreme spiritual battle, then delaying marriage (or starting or adding to a family) may be both wise and prudent.
I think choosing to avoid children out of fear that God won't provide or that he doesn't want our best is obviously sin. But setting aside having a larger family or spacing children for a time because God has another call (dangerous missions?) or to be faithful to obey by having a well-managed home for the sake of the gospel seems to have Biblical support.
Jami
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I also seem to sense from your posts that you are worried that you will somehow accidentally miss God's will for you life. I don't believe that any Christian who is so sincerely submitting her life to God as you seem to be is ever going to miss God's will. Psalm 37:4, Romans 8:28, Jeremiah 29:13, Proverbs 16:9 are just a few verses that I can find that address that.
As to whether God's will can ever be thwarted, I personally believe that all things fall under God's sovereignty. Ephesians 1:11 states that He "works all things according to the counsel of his will." But, since theologians have been debating this idea for centuries, I don't presume to clear up the argument in this post. :) The Old Testament is full of instances where God used all circumstances to accomplish His purposes. Some New Testament verses that allude to this are Acts 4:26-28, Acts 17:26, and Romans 9:19-24. Now, this is just my opinion, but I don't think, based on these Scriptures, that you will be able to prevent the birth of children that God wanted.
Excellent post, Staci. As long as a person is not disobeying God's revealed moral will (what the Bible clearly forbids or commands), then all other areas of our life fall under areas of freedom trusting that under his Sovereign will he will accomplish his purposes and His plan will be what *is*. Nothing happens outside of God's plans and purposes, or he would not be God. Decision making areas like where to live, where to attend school, spacing and limiting of children (as long as moral laws against taking a life are not crossed and general "welcoming" of children commands are obeyed) fall under areas where we have freedom. Though there are certainly Biblical principles that we need to bring to bear on making any decision: prayer, seeking wise council from spiritual mentors and those who know us well, considering our gifts and talents and how to best invest those, financial resources (does a man build a house without first considering the cost to make sure he can *finish* the work he begins?).
I mentioned it earlier, but Gary Friesen's book, "Decision Making and the Will of God" is the absolute best treatment of this sort of "individual will" that some believe falls between God's moral and sovereign will and I just do not see evidence for it in the Bible.
Jami
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And this is where I find I disagree with the Quiverfull argument and really like the comparison the Desiring God article makes. We're called to be fruitful and multiply, to subdue the earth, in the Creation Mandate in Genesis. But farmers do not buy or attempt to till and work as much land as they possibly can, though wouldn't subduing MORE of creation be MORE of a blessing? No, they thoughtfully take into account the amount of land their resources can bring to the fullest harvest. Resources including time, finances, physical strength, etc. Our calling is to bring up children who can be *effective* arrows, Godly arrows. And that means that choosing to space or limit those arrows may be wise. If I can not teach and disciple *well* more than 4 children (as far as I or my husband know and God of course will demonstrate I can handle more if that is what he pleases to do) and if I cannot care for my home and husband as I have already been called to with one child or a dozen, then more children are perhaps not wise.
I would also recommend the excellent book on making decisions in general to you, Aubrey. "Decision Making and the Will of God" by Gary Friesen. This book has been a wonderful guide to dh and I over the years and has given us a huge sense of freedom from fearing making the "wrong" decision about things which God has not expressly forbidden.
Jami
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Well said, Kendra.
The more I let the decisions about our family (size, location, use of resources) rest on dh's shoulders, the more peace and freedom from anxiety I feel. He is happy to listen to my input, advice, council, etc. on these things and I trust that he takes my heart into account, but the responsibility for the final decisions rest with him and he is accountable before God.
As Aubrey knows, we had three children in rapid succession. The third was in-utero during a very rough time for our family and her birth was an emergency c-section which I had a hard time recovering from (especially with two toddlers to care for at that time). At that point dh said, 'three is great, we're done at three' and I *mostly* agreed. But we decided to give ourselves 2 years before making final decisions and I left bc up to dh (barrier and timing with my cycle). After 2 years we were still overwhelmed with the three little ones and preparing for a huge move and transition in our lives, so being *done* still seemd wise. But we couldn't quite bring ourselves to be *done, done* ;) in part because dh was not yet 30 and I was just 30. We've continued to have the very kinds of conversations that you (Aubrey) and L are having. And I read the articles above that I linked for you. We continue to feel a great deal of freedom as believers in this area. But as *my* heart has started moving toward wanting a fourth and our youngest is now almost four...dh has to weigh whether our finances, parenting energy, emotional energy, responsibilites to the three we already have make having a fourth child a wise decision for our family. I'm thankful that he is able to think through these things in a more detached way, unlike my hormonally and baby-lust driven desires! :) But he's listened to my thoughts and reasonings and even the emotionally-charged arguments...and is now ready to add a fourth child to the mix. In God's timing of course, since we can't quite order one the moment we decide we're ready! :D
But if dh says four is where we stop, then that's the right decision for our family. I trust his judgement, more than my own even. ;)
These are hard issues and in our 10 years of marriage we've been round and round the same arguments and issue, but erring on the side of grace and not binding ourselves where the Bible is silent and spending most of our energy on obeying where the Bible is very clear (loving one another, bringing up our children in Godliness, submission and leadership, etc.) seems to help relieve some of the earlier anxiety we (I) felt about these issues.
Jami
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Maybe this has been posted. But the article I'll link from Desiring God ministries (John Piper) is the most balanced I've seen on these issues. It encourages children and yet points out where limiting family-size might be perfectly Biblical.
Jami
Edit: Here's another article I like by Douglas Wilson, who is more balanced than I think some would expect him to be. ;)
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Here you go, Audrey.
http://www.geocities.com/justahappygrl/
Click on the AO/SOTW link to see the combined PDF.
Jami
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My daughter has read and enjoyed a few of these books. And the one I read aloud to them seemed sweet and well-written for that reading level. Another series by Cynthia Rylant that is that same beginning chapter book-level is "The Cobble Street Cousins". I can't say if these are a step back for your dd, I don't know what she's been reading thus far. I would say both of these series are about the same level as Magic Tree House.
My dd loves Boxcar Children, B is for Betsy, Little House in the Big Woods, Flat Stanley books and well, really anything she can get her hands on, but those are a few of her favorites. Oh and Beatrix Potter stories if your dd hasn't read those to herself. The language is much more challenging than many early chapter books but the picture book format makes them less intimidating. We had one large collection, but I went ahead and purchased a set of the small books with each story separate to make them easier for little hands to hold.
Jami
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BA in history. About a year of graduate work.
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Anyone else think Luke Menard(sp?) looks like Orlando Bloom?
Yes! I totally thought that when I saw him. :)
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I agree with Michael Johns, he's my top guy right now. I also liked David Cook (sang "Happy Together" I think), David Something (the young kid), and the dreadlock guy that played the guitar. None of the girls really stood out to me, but I was in and out with kids and eclipse too. :) Maybe I'll find a favorite next week. Or I just prefer male voices! LOL.
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we'll have weeks off here and there for travel or guests, but I like to keep up with a math, writing practice, and plenty of reading (them to me, me to them) through the summer. We use Horizons for math and I may take a short break when they finish their current books and do a little Singapore to change things up a bit. I'll continue with our history and literature readings from Ambleside. I want to get up to Queen Elizabeth and the age of Exploration in our British history studies because we'll be doing a year of American history next year and I'll start with the explorers. :) Violin lessons continue during the summer. Really most any "skill" (math, music, writing) I hate to have too long a break away from at the ages my children are.
Oh and we'll grow some things in the backyard starting in another month or so and continue through the summer, so we add in "botany" I guess. :)
Jami
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Hey Aubrey,
Is this All Saints/Baylor in Fort Worth? I've seen ads that they're adding a Midwife Center and am curious about that. If we have a fourth I'll be a VBac and don't have your confident track record. But I do think I'd like to look into working with a midwife/birthing center. But the first two people you talked to!?! Wow! *cringe*
Jami
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Just saw it! It's about fully eclipsed here in TX. Our 6.5 year old enjoyed seeing it, but the bat that flew overhead was more exciting. ;)
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I hate all carpet. Even "industrial" stuff. I'm trapped in a rental with all carpet right now after living in two homes previously with all hardwoods (and vinyl in the kitchen and baths). Wood floors are a breeze to take care of. Sweep or mop to keep dust contained (and you can actually *see* that you get the dust unlike nasty carpet which hides it) and maybe an occasional damp mop with vinegar water. I'd do ceramic tile too if wood weren't a choice, but it's so much harder. And I really think Pergo screams fake, feels fake, looks fake, *sounds* fake...not a fan. ;) That said, I'd still choose a laminate over carpet if budget required. :)
Jami
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Lol, Yes, Your Jami. ;) I dropped the "in TX". Glad to see you here. :)
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That looks wonderful, Eliana!
I'm going to have to look around for it. My children just adore all things Aurthurian. One afternoon they were pretending to be Arthur (ds 6.5), Gwenivere (dd 5.5) and "A Kitty Bishop who officiates the marriage between A and G) (dd 3.5). Don't ask about the Kitty Bishop, I have no idea where it came from. LOL. My littlest one is just usually the sidekick pet in their play.
Jami
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:) I've been around the Gen. board a bit, just cut back on my time here lately.
Sorry if you felt bombarded a bit by the "Don't do workbooks!" advice. You know your needs and situation best. I don't know if your oldest would be quite ready for it, but Calvert's puts out a workbook that goes with CHOW. Would that be the kind of thing you're looking for? I guess I don't do "Social Studies" really, I don't know if my kids have many gaps in that area or not. For maps/geography I'd think you could find more stuff.
I TOTALLY envy you your limited time in the car! In St. Louis we had a much more dense radius, but here in TX things are a bit more spread out. So I try and make good use of the time we're stuck en route to one place or another. ;)
Good luck finding something that fits your needs for this season!
Jami
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Hey Aubrey,
Usborne has a nice version of Robin Hood that my two like.
I hope that takes you there. It's "Tales of Robin Hood" by Clayborne.
We have the Pyle version on audiobook but we haven't tried it out yet.
We also have a great recording of King Arthur read by Sean Bean produced by Naxos Audio.
My kids EAT this sort of stuff up. ;)
Jami
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but we're huge fans of SOTW Audiobooks here. When we drive just about anywhere that takes longer than 15 min. that's what goes on in the car. Rest times, while they're playing, etc. And my older two seem to have great retention. I also have "Our Island Story" from Libravox downloaded and they listen to that. I *personally* think history done through workbooks sounds awful :D but that may just be me. Honestly though, for 2nd and 3rd, history doesn't need to be anything more than stacks of library books or books on tape. I think I'd rather just try and squeeze in one afternoon a WEEK where we read and discuss a little bit of SOTW or something than use workbooks for this subject. Or Saturday history while dad watches the littler ones?
Not very helpful, am I?
:)
Jami
I re-read your response to Michelle. I really think finding some great audiobooks would be best for you. There's SOTW of course, and OIS at Libravox or Amazon, I think somewhere I've seen a recording of Baldwin's 50 Famous Stories which is great. If you honestly just don't have time for the extra reading aloud, then audiobooks really are a better option than workbooks, IMNSHO. ;) Then have them draw you a picture or just tell you at the dinner table about what they were listening to.
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We should start a branch of the Mutual Admiration Society. :) Good thoughts, I hope you enjoy the Omnibus lectures, I really enjoyed a couple of Ty Fischer's from this past year on the flow of history.
Jami
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Hi Beth,
Angelina nudged me over here to chime in on your question. :) I do indeed have VP and Circe lectures galore. I would say that by and large, the VP lectures are more nuts and bolts on HOW to use Veritas materials. The ones focused on the Grammar stage are fairly classroom-centric in their advice. Which would be fantastic for those teachers teaching in schools using VP products, but is somewhat less practical, and can even be burdensome for those of us at home. Even the talks given about homeschooling are a heavier "school at home" model and *I* think need to be taken with a grain of salt.
But some of the talks are more inspirational (Leland Ryken's from the 2007 conference are excellent!). I do like Ty Fischer's lectures on the Great Books, history and Omnibus. Emily Fischer's on being a great teacher is a favorite too, though again, there's a classroom emphasis. It's really hit and miss for me, but at 49$, I'm okay with that.
Now Circe, Circe I rarely get a miss. ;) I will say that I tend to look for talks which inspire me, give me big ideas to work from, help shape my vision more than really practical, how-to talks. So Circe usually fits the bill there. Though they do have some more practical lectures. I wish Circe would go to MP3 downloads for their lectures so they can offer them cheaper than 6$ a CD. If you want recommendations on what to buy some of my favorites from this past summer and previous years are Andrew Kern's talks on the general theme from each year (Justice, Beauty, Order, Knowledge, Contemplation), Ken Myers (the one from this past summer is fabulous!), James Daniels (the first person I really heard say "whoa, I do not think Sayers meant what you think she meant.", James Taylor on Poetic Knowledge and Good books before Great books, Martin Cothran and Cheryl Lowe have helpful experiences to share from how Highlands operates. I will say that though I have a handful of CDs I like from this past year (Contemplation), Knowledge and Beauty are the two years that I tend to go back to again and again.
Hope that helps and doesn't break your budget! ;)
Since you're in TX Beth are you planning on going to Houston for Circe this year?
Jami
What do your children do between getting up, breakfast & before school starts....
in General Education Discussion Board
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Well one seriously early bird who wakes everyone in the nest. ;)
Ds gets up sometime after 6 usually. He's supposed to stay in his room till 7 and not wake his sisters. He's getting better at that. Sometimes he makes himself a bowl of cereal once it's 7. Then dh gets up with the kids and makes them breakfast while I shower, make the bed, have time to think thoughts alone.... Let's see...after breakfast they all get dressed, brush teeth, make beds, tidy rooms a bit if needed, unload dishwasher and do other chores I may have for them. I usually check email and eat breakfast while they're doing these things. I was letting them play a bit before starting schoolwork, but grumbling about starting was increasing, so now we leave play for after lessons and violin practice. We're usually at our books by 8:30 or so. On a good day. :D
Jami