I am the only homeschooler in my church and we are very active and have been for 15 years. We love the pastor. He does some youth group stuff and went to a youth leadership camp a couple of weeks ago that he loved. But the youth group is really small and made up mostly of girls. There are 4 boys who are seniors who are nice guys but loud (he is quiet) and there are 4 or 5 junior high boys. All of the adults LOVE him and talk about how cool he is. He gets along well with adults, but has nothing in common with the young people. They all have cell phones, go to ps, etc. Not old enough for driver's ed ( he is actually 14) We are part of a homeschool co-op in a neighboring town, but he never bonded with anyone there. Once again, there were boys older and boys younger but none his age. Plus, most are from that town so you are talking 30 minutes away. I do plan to have him do dual credit starting next year as a 10th grader. But I have 3 other children and a disabled parent that lives here that I have to take care of as well.

How do you punish for serious infractions? Like going around parental controls and looking at inappropriate things on the internet? His IPOD and computer privileges have been revoked for the next 2 months, but we did that last time.:001_huh: He has no friends, and doesn't go anywhere without us (He's 15) so what is the point of grounding??? Grounding from what? Banning him from family movie nights?? (No cable and don't watch tv?) Losing the privilege of working on Easy Worship/Power Point at church (which I hate to do when that is his only thing he does outside of home) Sigh.. I'm just not sure what to do. He is brilliant with a very high IQ. I mean, in 3 years he will be out on his own and do whatever he wants. He really likes computers and is good at them, but I worry.. I would love to sign him up for outside classes, but if I can't trust him then what?? Mara

This might be her anonymous posting name as well and she may be a regular visitor under a different name. So don't give up.

nt

No ice skating or indoor rock climbing and the local bowling alley allows smoking:tongue_smilie: Maybe go kart. I have no idea if they are open and they are in the neighboring town. Live music would have to be Christian... MMM.. there is putt putt...maybe that is an idea even though I'm awful. Kids might be mad that they didn't get to go. We live in a teeny tiny town with a little bigger town nearby. WE would have all of those things if we drove 2 1/2 hours, but that is a little far.

No one goes on dates with their hubby anymore that are fun??? !! I am so tired of being boring! I miss being excited.. How do you bring that back?

Yep, and that was part of what i was thinking when I posted my your turn post. Basically there won't be any time for this. But also... does it really matter anyway. I heard the most interesting/depressing sermon one time. It was about what you REALLY left behind. He talked about that diploma you worked so hard for. It hangs on the wall and represents so much work (or law school, med school, etc. I think it was a med school diploma he talked about.) But what in the world will your grandchildren do with it??? Put it in the trash probably. Unless you are Debakey, who will really care about the diploma?? He also talked about playing cards and saying, "Oh..so and so died..how sad and then they kept playing.." That will be us some day. So if I do spend all that time on the scrapbooks, pictures, etc. Who will care??? In 5o years, they will end up in an attic, ruined or in the trash... I mean what is really left??? I've been tossing a lot of things lately. Because I mean, if I know my children won't want them, why am I keeping them?? Mara

Dh and I have been married for 19 years and we are going on a date tonight. Any ideas. We have hardly gone on any since the kids were born starting 14 years ago. We have recently begun to go on a couple of dates. Movie, dinner and last time we went to Lowe's to buy supplies but he ended up on the phone with a case a lot. I would really like to do something fun, romantic. He is a great guy, but we have gotten old and boring! Any ideas? Mara

Yep, that is it exactly. I've always done what others needed to have done. Because that is the way it is and people say, don't worry when they leave the nest, when they get older... but now my kids are older and suddenly hormones have affected the normally good judgement of my oldest so I am back to being trapped at home as I cannot leave them alone and a babysitter for a 14yo is out of the question.. Sigh.. Other elderly responsiblilities are going on as well. So it really isn't every YOUR turn and you just have to accept it.. I'll just keep praying that Jesus gives me strength and I can do what everyone else needs me to do.. I'm in my mid forties and I thought it would be better. Instead, it is harder.

I guess that is just it.. It is free time doing what someone else wants to do. I would rather live by myself in a very small house or apartment, go to the same job for 50 years until I die of a heart attack. I like being home. I want people to know me and for me to know them. I'm tired of taking care of my children, elderly relatives, etc. Honestly, I would rather just be alone and go teach and then come home to a quiet house.. Just time to myself...

nt

GRR..I'm in a really rotten mood. I don't want to clean, don't want to plan school, don't want to interact with children. PEriod. Why in the world did I have any???? If only I could go back... GRR.. I do not want to have this slumber party tomorrow.. Ok...smile, and lets try to put together an easy bake oven..GRR

The thread about co-ops has me thinking. I woud really like NOT to do our co-op, but they do science labs there. But the pace is unreal (different chapter each week) My oldest is doing Apologia Biology there. So how do you do labs without doing a co-op. I would rather do it on our schedule, but the science is way beyond my comprehension. He'll do Chemistry next year as a 9th grader. If he were older I would have him do dual credit at a college, but at 14 I'm not comfortable with that. I couldnt' even do the labs with the elementary Apologia series, so my doing them is not an option. Co-op is good but somewhat stressful. Plus, then I have to teach a class and I can't even keep up with my brood ages 1st to 8th. Mara

Well, my dh is the problem.. or rather he is going through a really rough time right now in a sensative job, so who do I talk to about that?? I'm going through a REALLY tough time, so who do I talk to since dh is depressed about various circumstances? Our parents are part of the problem (caring for a couple of them, another dealing with re-ocurrance of breast cancer, etc.) So many things of a personal nature and I'm overwhelmed with no one to talk to. I think of my mom: She's dealing with breast cancer for the second time, her dh had a stroke in his 50's, he mom had alzheimer's and died) But they have a couple of close friends that they travel with and have been there for each other and their SS class is great...all at the hospital, meals, taking people to appointments. I take care of everyone, but if something happens to me or now I just need someone to take a burden off, etc. Who is there? If something catastrophic happened, my SS would bring me a meal I'm sure, but no real support if you know what I mean.. Most of you feel like you don't need anyone either. I'm tired of being the strong one. Mara

I have been lonely for so long and recently our SS class had an assignment about visiting everyone on the class roles. You should have heard everyone cackle. Everyone is either working 60 hours a day, shuttling their kids to activities and when are they ever home.. Dh joined in this conversation enthusiastically about how silly this idea was in this day and age. He seems to have no need for friends. No one here homeschools either. Yes, I belong to a homeschool group but it is in a neigboring town. Dh has no interest in contributing/visiting. I'm caring for an elderly relative as well, so my time is extremely limited. I'm just so tired and lonely. Mara

Do any of you have friends? Real life friends? I don't. Lots of aquaintances. How do you find someone you trust to talk to? Mara

No, I don't think he is an Aspie, though I don't know much about it. He looks me in the eye, laughs. We can have great conversations. My mom adores him and has great conversations with him. We went on an overseas mission trip (just him and dh and I) and he didn't hang around me, but hung around the college interns. He thought they were so cool as well as the youth ministers on the trip. Now he didn't say much, but just smiled and took it all in and did talk to them if they asked questions and such, but not an initiator. But I always knew where he was, glued to their sides. One of the interns was a Baylor guy who was great with all sorts of people, including my son and really drew him out some. As far as the administrator issue. He got tired of it asking for my password everytime they try to get on plugged in or if they put in TT7, i have to give permission, really any cd that gets put in there. So while my user was on he went in and changed it so he could do that. (I wouldn't have a clue how to do that!!!) The other issue has been get off the computer (he is organizing our photos or other non bad thing, but I just think he doesn't need to spend all of his time on the computer) After the punishments he has gotten better. I keep having talks about balance. No, making a Roxio video of our trip or playing with Alice to figure it out or looking at ESPN online isn't bad (we don't have cable so this is how he gets updates on sports stuff) but at the same time rooms need to be cleaned, puppies walked, enjoying time with the family needs to take place. What he is doing is for the most part productive, but he just needs balance. Mara

I am struggling so much with what I should do.. I have 4 children, the youngest isn't school age yet. My oldest is 13 and different. I pulled he and his brother out after their 3rd and 1st grade years (the younger one is 11). My oldest is bright. His 3rd grade teacher told me that he has such a bright brain and she hoped he could challenge him and he wouldn't be bored. Well, all they did that year was TAKS test practices. What a wasted year. He is very bright and math and science and his writing has come a long way as well. He got state recognition for his ACT scores last year through Duke Tip. He loves computers and is having a blast with the Alice 2 program (I found a textbook that takes him through it.) But.. I am really starting to worry about him socially. He has always been quiet and reserved and doesn't mix with his own age. He has to REALLY get to know someone before he will talk to them. He is also VERY small for his age (my 11yo is taller). I think he would have been bullied horribly in middle school. But I am really starting to have trouble with him this year. He has gotten sneaky and is doing things behind my back, especially with the computer and has lost computer priviledges multiple times over the last few months. He has always been my follow the rules type of guy, very respectful. But now he will say yes, mam and then do what he wants on his own time... :confused: I know that he needs more freedom at 13 than he did earlier, but where do you draw the line? He knows WAY more about computers than I do. He changed our administrator account!!! He likes computer games, but only gets to play with his brother on weekends and they play games like Lego Star Wars. He doesn't fit with our youth group at all and so doesn't go. They all have cell phones (he doesn't) and playstations/WII etc. He is only allowed on the internet when I am in the room (we have one computer in the playroom) and they visit Lego sites, Plugged In, ESPN, the Olympics sites) But he seems to have gotten so moody and anti-social. I am also having trouble keeping up this year with school. He is almost through Algebra I, taking Biology, TOG, LRTEG (he loves this..very logical to him) etc. He loves difficult subjects and has immense qualities of concentration. My 11yo on the other hand thinks anything that takes longer than 10 minutes takes forever and HATES math with a passion. He is also bright, however and I was surprised that his 5th grade test scores were actually better than my oldests at his age with the exception of math. If I don't constantly check him and his work, he won't do it. One day he had to do 3 days of math in one day because no computer games until it was done for the weekend. Just like piano and competitions, he doesn't work unless he has a deadline. Then I have a 1st grader I'm trying to teach how to read and a toddler. I'm emotionally and intellectually drained trying to do this. My oldest would like to stay home for high school (he's in 8th grade). My 11yo has never really liked homeschooling and would like to be with friends. Ok, that is another issue. They have none!!! We belong to a co-op and attend church, but in our church there is only one boy their age the rest are high schoolers or elementary. They will play flag football with our homeschool group again this year, but we just don't seem to connect with any of the other boys... I'm not sure why. I forgot they do have 2 friends but both are 6th grade, so no one my oldest boys age. As I said, we do co-op and sports. My 1st grade girl is a social butterfly and has tons of friends. My 11yo mixes with others well and does have those 2 friends, but oldest has none. I am scared to death about high school. How in the world can I keep up with my oldest?? Doesn't he need to mix with others. He just seems to be so anti-social... But he is so advance in math and science, he would probably be taking some things over again in 9th.. He just isn't like other kids and I guess that is ok, but he has had me in tears many times over the last few weeks making me wonder if I have ruined him by homeschooling him. How will he ever fit in the real world and not have a job and go home to his apartment and spend all day on his computer.... He seems problems with going into to much detail. During the Olympics, he was looking at it on the internet, watching everything he possibly could. Now it is football. If it is Alice, then he goes whole hog on that. But you need balance. How will he have balance when I'm not there making him??? Mara

Melissa, I am really confused and NEED to know.. This girl entered at the end of 8th, but they wouldn't let her in at the beginning of 9th??? My son is an 8th grader in Texas and I assumed I would just be able to register him this summer for next year if I wanted to. Is that not true?? I'm really having a hard time deciding what would be best for this child. He would be perfectly happy to homeschool, but has limited social skills and could benefit from HAVING to be around people, I think... I can give them test scores and he qualified for state recognition from his ACT score from Duke last year as a 7th grader (which only 1 student in our district did, so I think academically he is getting a great education...he just dislikes being around people and would happily spend time by himself all day..) Mara

We watched the 1953 Julius Caesar with Marlon Brando and my boys enjoyed it. First I let them read a comic book version of the play so they would have an idea of the plot. Then we watched it over 3 days, stopping every so often to discuss what was happening, what lines meant, etc. Not too often, though. For the ages you want to do, I would have them read or read a simplified version of whatever you decide to watch. I think an author named Lamb has some simplified versions. Much Ado About Nothing is also one of my favorite movies and I used it with my 10th graders in ps. There is an opening scene of male bottoms, which should be fine since yours are boys. However, when they take him to see the proof of her infidelity, the love scene is very vocal and rather graphic. I skipped that section and just told my class that he heard what he thought was his fiance making love to another man. My classes loved that movie. Their comments were, "This cannot be Shakespeare. It's funny!!" Why is it the ps only study tragedy?? Mara

Yes, I had it checked at the beginning of the year. My middle child is doing vision therapy, so I know exactly what you are talking about. That said, my middle child has always been my best reader despite his vision problems. Since I didn't teach my other children to read, (the ps did) I am just extremely insecure and don't have a clue what I am doing. I am a former senior English teacher and I don't remember at all how I learned to read. I just always have. I would much rather teach Shakespeare!!!! But reading is the most important skill of all, so I can't mess this up!!! I just went and cried when she told she hated reading as everyone else loves to read like me. I probably have several thousand books in my house. There are bookshelves in every room piled high. I've run out of room for my books. I adore reading. How can she hate it??? I'm really wondering if I should have sent her to ps kindergarten and then brought her home when she knew how to read like her brothers?? Mara

A direct quote from my child who is finishing kindergarten... As most of you suggested I stopped having her read for the last couple of months.. I have just read to her. When I asked her to...that was her response.. What am I going to do? My dh and my in-laws will croak if she is not reading well by the end of next year!!! Both my boys in ps were reading junior high books by the end of 1st grade!!! I am reading to her.. Mara

It is Castaway meets Night of the Zombie. Although I like Will Smith...just him on the screen... I thought from the previews that it was somekind of go back in time. And the end... from a medical standpoint...give me a break. SPOILER...don't read any further if you haven't seen it. How in the world did he know she was REALLY cured...that she didn't have brain damage? Who knew and had the materials to make the blood into an actual antidote... Give me a break. 2 hours of my life that I wasted... I don't watch horror and if I had known it was more of a horror movie, I would not have watched it. I thought it was an Independence Day kind of movie. Mara

Yep, my boys had friends when they were in ps, but now after 5years of homeschooling, we are down to one friend for my youngest. My oldest has no friends. Yes, we belong to a homeschooling group but he has never jelled. We are the only homeschooling family in our church and are although I am very involved, my children are starting to stick out like a sore thumb. The enjoy their parents. They have NOTHING in common with the youth kids who all have cell phones (a friend of my daughter's has a cell phone..at 6!!!) and are loud and have tv's in their rooms compared to us who don't have cable for our one family tv. (We do like documentaries and family movies from Netflix) Anyway, my oldest has complained about not having any friend, but I don't have a clue what to do, especially since he is shy anyway. We used to invite families for our birthday parties: 5 or 6 with tons of children. Now it is one poor boy to spend the night. Mara

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