I posted on my blog a picture of the vacant lot I'm considering for a community garden (we're in the city). Has anyone ever done this? I'm trying to research it all online, but I'm wondering about ideas like: can it be both a play space for kids and also a garden? What should the layout be? What elements should I include: raised beds, in-ground gardening, play area, sitting area? This would be a long-term project of course.

really am. :tongue_smilie: I did use the sitemeter and it worked! Imagine that. Thanks again...and to everyone who answered.

can see some grass. Haha...I bet you'll be ready to go home. ;) Sincerely, writer of the "next great blog" and babysister to Ohio12. (Thanks sis!)

the blogspot one...that's probably different than blogger.

words go under individual pictures if I want, and b) put any of those counters on (like how many people looked at your blog, etc). I have a feeling it will be myself and my sister looking at it the most. Haha...but I'd like to count it! Haha. Any help?

Everyone's answers (and my own ponderings) are starting to convince me that it's no one thing that is the problem. Living on a farm helps you feel like you have work to do, but that doesn't make it NOT mundane. Having lots of kids keeps you busy, but still leaves you wanting adult intereaction. Living in the city (like I do) puts you close to interesting places to go, but daily field trips don't make life meaningful either. I think you are right on that it's the way society is structured now. If we all lived in a big compound with our family, we'd have help, adult interaction, AND meaningful work. As a family unit we coudl work together to help each other, share the burdens, have a good time, but ALSO reach outside of our family to help others. It would be a heck of a lot easier to adopt children in need or to do some other important ministry if I had family around to share the load/childrearing with. And, in exchange, I'd take care of my mom and dad as well, you know? Funny thing is though, that even if my dh could get a job in my hometown, my family isn't like that. We are all so individualistic nowadays that my mom would be all about making sure she had "boundaries" in how much she was with us, etc. You know? It seems like a lot of European families I know (or other immigrant families) are so much better at this. Part of what I see in my own neighborhood is how the Latino families are ALWAYS together....they aren't out looking for friends at the playground because they are together: cooking, taking care of the kids, having dinner together, etc. In our society today we are so isolated! Sad too because I feel like I would have had more kids if I had felt like it was a family thing. I just feel like 2 is all I can handle with how alone I am! Thanks for your words. They were thought-provoking.

into a water oasis (baby pool, sprinkler, etc) for my 3 y/o ds. Between blowing up the pool, washing it out, filing it up, (oh, I cut the tiny bit of grass first) and then bringing out toys and cups and stuff....I got at last 5 whole minutes of fun before he was bored and wanted to come in. Good times! Of course, as usual, the fun part of the whole thing for ds is me setting the whole thing up for him. ;) Thanks for all your tips. I'm considering all of them and trying to just get over myself too...

You are right that boredom is a mindset, and I know I could learn a language, (I bought a book to learn Russian this year...hasn't happened. Who knew they had their own alphabet?! It's hard! Haha) but I think it may have something to do with how I get my creative energy or something. I'm a HUGE people person and being the only adult around all day makes me kinda depressed. It's probably why I spend too much time on the computer. I'm looking for inspiration from others all the time! I'll sit down to do something like read a book or work on a project and I Just feel tormented with anxiety and thoughts like "WHY are you doing this? Who cares if you learn Russian? No one! When will anyone care what you are doing?! How will this help anyone!" Then I think (and I know this is really bad but I can't help it): "WHY bother teaching your daughter Latin? If she's going to grow up and be a sahm, then when will any of this matter in her life? If her time will be spent driving kids around and wiping off counters, then won't she just be sad that she has all this knowledge and nothing to do with it?" I had a great college education and used to love sitting around talking about all the cool stuff that I learned, but now I feel like I may as well have not bothered with college because how am I using this knowledge? Like I said: major identitiy crisis. Sorry, because I know I wound like a spaz. And it probably is a HUGE mindset problem. And I think I'm depressed or something...

I know I shouldn't complain b/c I'm sure many of you live in the country or have lots of kids and are busy every second with things that are meaningful, so this is going to sound like I'm pampered or something, but here is is: I'm BORED! I've always been easily bored and the type that wants to feel like there is a purpose behind everything I do. The problem is, I can't seem to find my place or something. We live in the city, with the idea of doing a lot of urban ministry and liking the hustle and bustle of city life. however, there is not so much hustle and bustle for a sahm of two little kids. I'm surrounded by women who work and have ended up alone with my kids most of the time. We don't have much of a community, except at church, but I'm literally the ONLY sahm at my church (wait, there is one other). We live in a condo-type home which requires little maintenance and we have about 3 feet of grass so yard-work isn't much. My big "outside work" is hosing off the bird poop that lands on our walkway from our neighbor's house. The urban ministry idea is important to me, but if you're going to be a sahm, you don't have much time to do much. The other women I know who do work for social justice, etc, have JOBS in that area, so they aren't looking for childcare all the time so that they can sneak out and do "something". My angle in ministry was that I wanted to have an open home to the kids of the neighborhood, etc, but I'm realizing that no one's kids are home in the day! They are all in the public schools and then in after-school programs until dinner time! Anyway, I get up and clean up the house, and then basically entertain the kids. Is that what motherhood was supposed to be? Sitting at the pool or sitting at the park all day? Or, in the cold chicago winters, driving around trying to find a McDonald's playground to hang out at? We are homeschooling, but with a 5 y/o that isn't much of a time commitment yet. Then, in the evening, I feel like my husband and I kinda chill and feel bored. I probably don't have enough work to do around here, but I feel this huge "life is meaningless" feeling right now! I'm also just probably lonely because I don't have a lot of other women around me doing the same thing. I have a very high expectiation for myself and for how we raise our kids which is why I want to homeschool and all, but I'm not sure I'm doing this right. I feel like I have to get up and fill these long hours every day and I'm so bored of it! I'm probably ADHD or something, but it's making me really depressed right now. Maybe this is sort of an "urban phenomenon"....I need a farm. ;)

It may come to that...

It's just like the Friend's episode because I called to ask the membership lady how much longer I am committed to the gym and she acted like she had NO idea and I'd need to talk to the head guy...so now "head guy" is calling me back. Aaaahhhh! It's so expensive and I'm never going right now. Pray that I will, indeed, quit the gym and not end up signing up for 12 yoga classes instead. ;)

but I'll tell you that I've been watching one my my dd's friends for almost 2 years now and it hasn't been an easy trip all the time. If parents are late to pick her up or if mom tries to sit and chat with me it totally throws off dinner. There are a lot of things, and it was a decent experience, but I'd be wary. If you can possibly pay for gymnastics another way, I'd do it. It's really like adding another member to the family and we've had some tough days with it.

for attention/approval or something, and sometimes I think they might be fun and therapeutic and give me a sense of accomplishment. Or, maybe I think it's the newest form of socializing that people do...like it's a way to really get to know people better. I love it when you ladies have blogs and I can read them and find out how you do things, etc. But, sometimes I'm worried that it would be tempting to just put cool stuff on there and not where I'm failing in life, you know? Haha. Sometimes my sister and I read people's blogs and say how that person is just trying to be so awesome, and I don't want to be that way. Anyway, say I wanted to try it....where do you go? Blogs-r-us?

assumed that I'd be helping for the week, so I feel like I need to help somewhat. I just HATE how people plan these things by themselves and THEN ask for volunteers because I would have told her that the whole thing should have been from 9-11:30! It's hard because I feel like I can't say what I really want to say but I feel like I can't say "no" altogether either. I guess I'll just tell her that I think I need to stay with Tues/Fri because we had other plans that week. Yikes.

Friend at church decided to have a "vbs" of sorts at our church that goes from 9-2 every day for a week. She has older kids and works at the church and her kids go to camp all day every day in the summer so this does not seem long to her. My kids are 5 and 3 and the younger one takes naps. I told her I could help 2 days that week because my little one would not make it at a 5 hour vbs all week long with no nap. DH works from home 2 days/week, so he could stay with him those days. Anyway, it took all my nerve to tell her that I would only do 2 days, and now she's e-mailing and asking if I could do every day for 2 hours instead. Now, I know I should be happy to do this (sorta) but it lunch time every day and our church is kinda a 20 minute drive away. I just think that the whole thing was planned weirdly. She wants this vbs to be 5 hours long every day (and include lunch) so shouldn't she have asked her volunteers if they thought this was a good idea before she put it in the church bulletin? She's acting like she can't get enough volunteers, and I want to feel bad for her, but I think this whole thing is crazy! We're in the city and myself and one other mom are the ONLY sahm's in our whole church. I don't know who she thought was going to volunteer for this. I guess I'm asking: should I just buck-up and do this or can I say no without being a totally weeny?

On that subject as well...how many of you have some form of help with childcare? I mean, a date night or grandma or something? I have neither right now...and homeschooling with no babysitter ever seems so daunting! But anyway...give me a movie title if you can think of something not depressing! Just saw Bella and Kiterunner...they're both very good, but I need something fun tonight.

I have a 5 and 3 y/o. My 5 y/o dd is pretty tame, but she's definitely willful in her own way. My 3 y/o is just a disaster though. He has been a challenge since he learned to walk at 9 months old! :) I have tried different things over the last year, but spanking is the primary discipline around here for DIRECT, WILLFUL disobedience. Not for everythign like fighting with big sister or whatever, but definitely for your typical screaming "no" and running away type of behavior. We've tried time outs but we have never had a single bit of "luck" with that. On the other hand, spanking hasn't really gotten us anywhere either. I've tried very hard to "disciple" them by talking to them about what Jesus would want us to do and by talking to my son about saying he was wrong and apologizing and I have talked to him about "protecting" his sister rather than hurting her, etc. Anyway, I just say that so you realize I'm not this crazy out-of-control spanker or anything. However, he is just one disobedient thing after another right now. I mean, I can be taking them to the pool and in the process of getting in the car to getting into the pool, we can have had about 10 big problems, (taking off his seat belt, hitting sister in the car, running away and not holding my hand on the way into the pool, throwing a fit about putting on suntan lotion, trying to run at the pool rather than walk, etc). I try to deal with each problem calmly and rationally but firmly and consistently, but after at least a year of disciplining this kid 150 times a day, I feel like I have not seen one speck of improvement!!! He is in his room right now because he was supposed to sit on a chair for about 3.5 minutes while I got an adjustment at the chiropractor and he ran around the room like a mad man instead! I'm so tired of how negative I have to be ALL THE TIME! I feel like all I do is discipline!! HELP!

That's actually my big sister and me when we were little. She posts on here too, (ohio12) so I thought it was kinda funny to put that. Her picture (on her avatar) is also her as a little girl so I just copied off of her (typical younger sister, right!).

had a parakeet when I was little, but I think it was hand-raised or something because it was nice and tame and sat on your hand and kissed your cheek and all that cute stuff. This is one of those "bin-o-budgies" and she's a little nervous. I covered her cage with a blanket, but what other advice do you have on "taming" her? I read a good article on it, (first you just introduce your hand for a week, then you hold the perch for her to jump onto, then you put your finger and the perch together, then just your finger, etc) but I'm worried because she makes no noise! My pet bird squawked all day long!

burden, in your opinion? My kids are 5 and 3 and we aren't thinking of having any more. We are homeschooling, but live in the city, so we don't have a huge yard. I'm a sahm, though, so we could take it on walks, obviously. I didn't grow up with pets and neither did dh, but we don't want to deprive the kids of the experience and both of them love animals so much! DD might be happy with a parakeet though. WWYD?

http://www.bbc.co.uk/food/recipes/database/chickenandbeancassou_67189.shtml I am making this recipe right now for a chicken cassoulet. Would you leave the skin on the chicken? And, if you are supposed to add a whole bulb of garlic, does that mean "not peeled" with the papery stuff on? HELP! I'm clueless.

Seriously...if someone said "don't let her be so cute...it's very distracting" about my daughter, I would knee them in the groin and then I would tell the manager of the place and never go back. And, just to qualify my statement: I am not an overprotective mother. I live in what many would call the "inner city" of chicago, and I'm not a worrier. But, a HUGE red flag goes up for me with gymnastics teachers. I'm from Kansas and SEVERAL main gyms there had guys who ended up being perverts...this is not something to screw around with. This is a guy who is going to be touching your daughter frequently and she will definitely be affected by it even if it didn't go further. A coach I had was flirtatious with me through my younger years (say ages 8-11) and I still remember feeling weird around him. Don't screw around with this. I'm sure there are other places where your dd can take gymnastics. PLEASE don't put her in this situation. I'm sure she is oblivious to his "advances" but they will be her first memories of a man who is allowed to be physically "in contact" with her and you don't want her first experiences to be flirtatious at all. Just my two cents....

how to get them on. TIA!

please! I returned my art book to the library that tells cool ways to teach preschoolers about the different artists. Does anyone have that book?

out in the fridge right now! This will be a good second try! :)