Paige
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Posts posted by Paige
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Very normal. I have had kids who would just clean the room, but those kinds of kids didn't usually need to be told to clean their rooms because those rooms rarely got messy. The messy kids could never.
I think cleanliness/messiness is 100% personality and neurodivergence will impact it a lot on either side. I don't think anything you do as a parent can change this for them. You can help them consistently and have a relatively clean room (because of your help) or you can not help and they'll have messy rooms until something changes within themselves which may or may not happen until they are into adulthood.
I'm sort of in the middle myself- I can handle cleaning my own space but I'm messier than my dad would have liked and messier than my ideal self would like. I'm mostly neurotypical though. I've been reading How to Keep House While Drowning to help my 14yr old and I find it very compassionate. It's not a big eye opener for me as far as practical ideas, but it has helped me see things from my kids' persepctives and has given me a few ideas to propose to DD that might actually make sense to her.
It's a quick, easy read if your library has it and you suspect either of your kids may have ADHD or some other kind of neurodivergence.
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4 hours ago, Elizabeth86 said:
People who nod off and napping in general. My dh drives me crazy dozing in his chair. He’s lounging there now with his phone in his hand. He’ll stir, scroll, doze. Ugh. I have to be SICK to sleep in the day so napping people annoy me in general. I can’t sleep unless I’m horizontal in the quiet darkness. People that sleep anywhere make so irrationally annoyed. I guess I could forgive old people, but dh has been doing since he was 20. Totally irrational, but it makes me want to scream! My sister also takes a daily nap. It just seems so…? I hate naps.
This drives me crazy too. In my family, it always seemed like it was always a few men who'd show up to my grandmother's at Thanksgiving or other events and just sleep in the middle of the room. Every year. My dad didn't but I see it in DH's family too- always and only the guys. So rude, IMO.
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My students have classes taken in PS where the school's grade scale used pluses and minuses. For myself, I prefer to keep it simple and use a straight ABC scale. When I include those classes (indentified as transfers) into my school, can I wipe out the pluses and minuses and calculate the GPA on my scale? They will see the original school's scale on that school's official transcripts but I don't like seeing the mix next to mine. There's about an equal number of +/- on the school's transcripts so I don't see it as benefiting or hurting the GPAs, although if I calculated them as the school did with mine I feel it would make my class grades look unfairly low since + was not an option. Sorry if this is clear as mud.
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11 hours ago, Lawyer&Mom said:
I wear all-stretch nursing bras even though I haven’t nursed in over five years. I’ve even bought new ones since I weaned the last kid. They are just so comfortable. More comfortable than going without.
Me too. I had to wear nursing bras 24/7 when nursing unless I wanted wet shirts,. These are so comfortable that I prefer to wear them all the time even after weaning even though they don't do much for my appearance. I used to take bras off at night but now I prefer not to. I have other bras that fit better and look better that I wear when I want to look nicer and I take them off as soon as I get home and switch back to the nursing ones.
My daughters hate bras and I bought them nursing ones to see if that would help but they still don't really like wearing them.
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I would be furious and if she were my child, I'd probably be emotional and who knows what sort of not best practices knee jerk reaction I'd have. As an outsider, I can have sympathy for her and the children she risked. I would want to handle both sides of it.
First, I think she should apologize to the families whose children she put at risk and your mother who she placed in a terrible position. Then maybe have her read some info about food allergies, kids who have died, etc and write up a proposal for how camps can stay accessible and fair. Sure, she probably knows all of this because of your family history and from what she's already said, but I think it would reinforce the message plus my kids hate extra homework and it would be a sort of consequence.
2nd part would be addressing the emotional side for her. I'd try to approach it from this is unlike you, cry for help, what's going on....and listen to her. If she expresses unmet needs we could try to meet them. If not, I'd proactively try to have some one on one time with her for a while which would increase supervision and give her room to open up later. I had some acting out as a kid that my parents really should have paid attention to and shut down but they didn't- I'm cautious about letting things slide.
Lastly, kids that age can be a real PITA and sometimes act out randomly. It doesn't mean she's a budding psychopath.
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When I get it they give me 2 shots in the butt (prednisone), plus a prednisone prescription and zantac+zyrtec by mouth. It really helps. If you don't want the shots, you could just try zantac and zyrtec OTC- you need to take both for the best results. I'm pretty sure they give me higher doses than OTC but it may be overkill. I break out pretty badly.
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I want to spend some time on comedy writing and literature for Senior Year. I plan to pick a few of Shakespeare's comedies and A Confederacy of Dunces, but I'm not sure what else to consider. Three Men is a Boat may be good but it's not a personal favorite. What are the funniest books you've read that aren't just memoirs? We've already done The Importance of Being Earnest.
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My current favorites are Ambrosia but I don't see them often. I usually pick Pink Lady or Lady Alice unless they are too expensive, but I can accept any apple.
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We used to use Climbing to Good English. I think it's gentler for the littles.
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2 hours ago, Terabith said:
When we got the pulse ox in February of 2020 and started playing with it, we discovered that my oldest’s heart rate hangs out in the 140’s. Completely freaked me out. Psychiatrist was actually alarmed (my first thought was serotonin syndrome but no other symptoms). Quickly got into cardiologist, who did a 48 hour halter monitor, and it turned out okay. It comes down more than we’d thought while they sleep. Cardiologist actually said it was fine, so other than not being able to donate blood and not being able to use stimulants for newly diagnosed ADHD, no issues. Nobody here has had covid as far as we know.
Is your oldest very thin? The cardiologist found an abnormality w/DDs heart and wants to be proactive because of it, but she said that having muscle and fat on the body helps control the heart. DD is under orders to gain some weight.
We also really want DD to be able to take her stimulants for ADHD.
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I hope your DS is doing well! Maybe you could give him some caffeine regularly until he gets into the cardiologist. They would give it to my babies in the NICU to keep their heart rates up. I kept drinking caffeinated drinks so they'd get it through my breastmilk when we got home. It may help.
My DD had the opposite issue- her resting heart rate has been hanging out around 130 and sometimes up to 150/160 and the doctor did not care. She's tiny and has never had covid as far as we know. After being dismissed by the familiy doctor for months, we got into a cardiologist who takes it very seriously and I feel better about that. DD feels better too with some medication. We were able to get into the cardiologist relatively quickly. Unless you are restricted in who you can see, you might have some luck if you call around.
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For HSA, they would do an evaluation and place her into their system based on that. It doesn't matter what they call it. It's her 4th year of Spanish and it will be at the level she places in so she'll be learning. Call it Spanish 4 on the transcript regardless of what less she places into with HSA. HSA is personalized so they can meet you wherever you are. I would not recommend someone transferring into Fundafunda Spanish at level 4. They go fast and if there are significant differences in the curricula between them and the previous provider it will be difficult to keep up.
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I'd sign up for Homeschool Spanish Academy unless the cost was prohibitive. You can jump in with them anytime.
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I don't. I always hated dealing with meat when cooking and enjoy side dishes more. We are mostly vegetarian now and I don't miss it at all. My girls had seriously low iron and the pediatrician specifically recommended multi grain cheerios. They have 100% of the daily iron reccomendation.
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3 hours ago, Matryoshka said:
I had humongo-boobs too. This is I think the reason why, other than that one time in the woods, I never nursed in the sling. Boob too big, might suffocate baby. While hiking, boob may have just gotten whipped out as I literally could not stop to feed (in any manner) as there were three toddlers to chase. That was a crazy day! Sleeping while nursing, though, that was awesome. One baby on each side, I'd rotate. If I hadn't been able to do that, I would likely have done bottles at night, at least part of the time.
I also never figured out nursing both at once, as many twin moms do. Way too overstimulating, and positioning issues. I did buy a wardrobe of nursing clothes, as I couldn't discreetly lift up a shirt to nurse. But with the clothes, I nursed right out in public all the time, and I'm pretty sure no one was the wiser, as I never got hassled about it once. Of course, the clothes also cost $.
I never figured out tandem nursing either. I could do it if I had to- I mean they could latch, but nobody was comfortable and then I really felt like a cow who couldn't move. They took turns. I may have done it more if they had been my first, but I knew what comfortable nursing felt like.
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16 hours ago, Farrar said:
I agree that was the goal. And with your larger point there.
But also, I felt that some of the monetary calculations were a bit silly. Much of this level of cost is borne no matter how you choose to feed. And some of the framing seemed to subtly undermine or discourage breastfeeding or make it seem more elitist, like the whole special tea thing. No matter what choices you make, babies are expensive and time consuming. This seemed to imply that bf'ing is exponentially more so and I don't fully buy that. Bf'ing precludes handing off a large portion of that labor, but the labor doesn't vanish. And both poor and wealthy women and everyone in between choose to bf. Circumstances are individual, but also... bf'ing is not elite. Formula is not impoverished. Lots of women choose both at all sorts of levels of income. Because again, babies are just a series of expensive choices. And sometimes bf'ing turns out to be extra expensive because it involves a lot of specialists and difficulty and giving up high salaries. And sometimes formula turns out to be expensive with a baby who has special needs or allergies. It's just... individual.
Breastfeeding puts the cost entirely on one person's chest, however. Formula feeding lets the burden be distributed upon multiple people- partners, grandparents, childcare workers. The costs may be about about the same, but the individual burden is not.
I am lucky that breastfeeding was easy for me and I had the privilege to keep it easy. I've never been more exhausted in my life, however, than when I had preemie twins who we were trying to switch from being exclusively bottle fed expressed milk (in NICU) to exclusively breastfed. My DH could do none of that work. He couldn't pump, and he couldn't breastfeed. Even when he did bottles, I still nursed immediately before or after, and sometimes used the SNS so he couldn't be involved at all. He claims he was tired but he didn't know tired. I remember waking after falling asleep upright in a chair, attached to the pump with it still attached and running, and being absolutely soaked from breastmilk on my lap and puddles on the floor. I was devastated about all that lost milk and sore. I remember being so tired that I quit cleaning up the spit up on the floor and thought we could just rip the carpet out later because it was too much work. It was exhausting, it was my choice, but it would 100% have been easier for me if I'd let someone else take some of the feeding responsibilities.
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Mine is a maintenance inhaler and I noticed the racing heart/ shakiness right away but it just got worse and worse until I couldn't even pour coffee after my morning puffs. That was the last straw- coffee is necessary! 😁 Rescue inhaler would do it too to a lesser extent but I use that so rarely. Hopefully the treatment you're on will get things under control and you won't need any inhaler often.
Now I understand why my mom's pulmonologist wants to keep her off a maintenance inhaler if at all possible.
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5 hours ago, Junie said:
I think that my asthma inhaler is causing anxiety. 😞
Hi Junie, nice to see you. Popped in and saw this and it's interesting because I decided today to quit mine too. Mine was definitely causing racing heart and tremors and I think maybe the cause of my long distance vision rapidly declining. I'm taking symbicort- not sure if any other inhaler would be better. Unfortunately none of them work as well. I think the racing heart it can cause would definitely correlate to an increase in anxiety.
I tried going down to one puff a day and it helped some but with 0 puffs I cough but I don't shake.
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14 hours ago, Murphy101 said:
Yes. I understand that. And you understand that. And maybe 5 other people on the plant seem to understand that. But usually after the initial series it’s several years (5 or 10) before a booster is recommended.
I think another thing people forget is that vaccines for measles, polio, chicken pox, etc, work so well in part because at this point community spread for these is so low. Maybe immunity wanes some after a few years, but it matters little because not much protection is needed when nobody has it.
I would be very interested to see stats for breakthrough infections of measles and polio from the first few years that the vaccines were available. I feel we had a lot more breaktrhough chicken pox infections when the vaccine first started too. I know my niece and nephew got chicken pox after that vaccine but both had mild cases with few pox. Now, I rarely hear of a chicken pox breakthrough but it could just be coincidence or the age of my kids.
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9 hours ago, Quill said:
I’m not saying they didn’t prevent deaths and it would have been my hope that every eligible person got vaxed. It just annoys me that the official communications to the public shifted and “they” pretend that was the goal all along. Like, TPTB said, “If everyone gets vaccinated, we can protect our vulnerable population, ditch the masks, and move into something more like normal life.” But, when that didn’t happen, TPTB changed their tune (multiple times, actually) and then pretended that, all along, the goal was reducing hospitalizations and deaths. Even when fully vaxed people first started getting Covid anyway, which in my non-scientific observation was summer, 2021 and was months and months before Omicron rose, they were first called “breakthrough” cases. Remember that? And of course, there are breakthrough cases, we know that, no vax is 100%. But in the months following, they *stopped* saying “breakthrough cases”; that term is never used anymore. If a person who tests positive is also vaxed and boosted, it is a footnote in the conversation. It’s like, “Yeah, Aunt Mable just tested positive for COVID….yeah, she is fully vaxed and boosted.”
Anyway…I feel how I feel. I’m not saying it’s 100% logical. It’s just how I feel. I thought I was getting the vax and encouraging others to get the vax and arguing wi the my husband about getting the vax and persuading my mom to get the vax because we would all be much better off by now. But that did not happen, the anti-vax people mostly feel vindicated and I’m *still* having to worry about riding a bus to New York for five hours, sitting in a movie theater to watch Secrets of Dumbledore, and hoping my son’s graduation doesn’t suddenly go virtual. So, I am bitterly disappointed. It’s not necessarily logical, it just *is*.
But that's an if, then statement. When the if didn't happen, they had to moderate the then. We don't know what would have happened if they had gotten nearly everyone vaccinated and masking quickly. It may not have helped much unless we had truly global cooperation.
I agree that CDC messaging has been terribly inconsistent, however. I still feel vaccination provides protection against serious disease and I am angry that they are slow rolling the under 5s. It's like the FDA doesn't care- there's no urgency. Grandparents don't care- they see nobody else caring about covid anymore and think we shouldn't care. Other parents don't care. But my 4yr old is getting tested for asthma soon and I have NO desire to see how he fares with covid with no protection.
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11 hours ago, maize said:
Eeh...I was hardly setting Columbus up as a hero 😂😂😂
He is one sample of his culture though. A prominent one. And not good evidence that pre-atlantic-slave-trade folks were all big-table-welcome-everyone-respectfully-to-a-seat. You explicitly claimed that "all the historical evidence points to the learned nature and humanity of more pigmented groups, particularly indigenous peoples in America, Africa and Asia, and their leadership and talents being respected in part due to their vast wealth and stores of knowledge"
Presumably "all the historical evidence" would include historical figures like Columbus?
He clearly has negative biases coming out of every orifice!
Columbus was a terrible person, and I have no doubt you'd agree with that. You seem to be attributing his prejudice towards and evil treatment of the native Islanders to racism, however, where I would assert that it can be easily explained by pure xenophobia, religious intolerance, and even baser things like how power and impunity affects people. If they all looked exactly like him, their treatment probably would not have differed much. My belief is that the dehumanization was because of their different culture.
And I knew that Barack Obama and today's racism would be pointed out when I brought up the African Emperor- but can you imagine an African Pope, President, Queen, General around 1822? Absolutely not. Sure we had Frederick Douglas and it was a big deal that he could meet Lincoln, but he could not have been President.
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7 hours ago, maize said:
I really doubt the suggestion that complete assimilation is possible where physically obvious distinctions exist. Members of different groups can absolutely gain respect, but that doesn't prevent them from being perceived as "other." They can be given official citizenship and status while still being perceived as not-really-one-of-us.
I quoted here because you said it was prompted by my comment about Africans in Rome.
Being in-group does not necessarily mean assimilation by my definition, but I think being Emperor of Rome means that you are pretty well in group.
https://www.history.co.uk/article/severus-rome’s-first-african-emperor
Rome had black emperors and leaders, European countries had black people in their lineage, and there were black saints and popes. I'm not a historian of anything, but I feel we can't imagine today how much of our history has literally been white washed to justify slavery.
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22 hours ago, Slache said:
I think as long can we can say "I'm better than you because of X," we will do it. Racism was the cause of slavery in the first place, not the other way around.
There's lots of evidence that the reverse was true- racism, skin based racism, really took hold after the African slave trade started. The Moors in Spain and throughout Europe were highly regarded and held prominent positions in society. The Romans were also more xenophobic than racist and Africans could assimilate and become in group. Xenophobia existed, religious persecution existed, but Africans and Middle Eastern people were very highly regarded for their education, civility, and skills before 1500s. Once the Europeans started having African slaves in Europe, sentiments changed.
Racism as we know it is relatively modern.
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On 5/16/2022 at 1:33 AM, Ellie said:
Racism would still exist even if there had not been slavery.
Why do you think that? Race is a relatively modern concept and racism based on skin color seems to have really gained traction as justification for African slavery that existed rather than a primary cause of African slavery.
What would you give to a dinosaur loving toddler on his birthday? Updated
in The Chat Board
Posted
My DS (4) has been obsessed with dinos since he was 1. His lasting favorites have been dino stuffies, The Dino Dana Field Guides, kinetic sand with some plastic dinos, dino mask/claws, clothes b/c he literally only wears dino clothes and there's never enough, dishes/water bottle, dino puzzles, and for a non dino toy he loves his geosafari binoculars and has been carrying them everywhere for 2 years.