AHASRADA
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My dd plastic-wrapped a scary mask inside the toilet seat to scare whomever wandered in there to sleepily use the facilities this AM ;)
But her friend got her good (although "good" isn't really an appropriate description of her prank). She called my dd late this AM to tell her she is moving several hours away, and that she will likely miss their mutual friend's bday party next Friday because they are having a real estate open house that weekend. Dd was so upset, crying, talking about how her BF is moving away, so far away that she can't even visit, etc.
I had just spoken with the mom on Tues. and she hadn't mentioned a move, so I thought either dd had misunderstood, or something sudden and terrible had happened. I promised to email the mom to get the full story, and as I was typing, it dawned on me that it could be an April Fool's prank.
Dd called her back, and after initially denying it, she admitted it was a prank, but not to let on to their other friends, since she's pulling it on everyone.
What a relief for dd, and creative of her friend, but still...:glare:
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I haven't read all the posts, but I highly recommend the prefolds and fitteds at http://www.greenmountaindiapers.com/ as a high-quality and cost-effective solution.
I am also using cloth for the 1st time with our new baby. I was attracted to the reduced cost vs. disposable, but was mainly doing it for comfort, reduced diaper rash, lack of chemicals against baby's skin, etc. as well as keeping raw sewage out of the trash.
I decided to use only cotton products (and a bit of bamboo) as opposed to synthetic microfibers, etc., and have been very pleased.
I just fold the prefold in thirds, place it in the cover, and velcro it on. A bit more EBF poop does get on the cover that way, but it's no big deal. Fitteds contain these messes a bit better, but stain a bit more easily since the mess gets into the elastic and stitching but again, no big deal.
Personally, I love AIOs, but they can be expensive. I have Bottom Bumpers one-size with side snaps which have a snap-in insert. They're not cheap but they're one-size so they will last. My absolute favorite AIO hands-down are Oso Cozy. They are very cost-effective for an AIO and fit my baby perfectly. The small size from 7-13 pounds fit her well as a newborn, and still fit well as a 13 lb. 4 month old! I find AIOs extremely handy for outings.
I would suggest you use mainly pre-folds, and have 3-4 AIOs for the diaper bag.
Best of luck!
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Personally, I was uncomfortable with the idea of having a foreign object floating in my uterus, and the advisory to expect pain upon insertion and for a day or so afterward, as well as the slim chance of it perforating the uterus and wandering into another part of my body, just scared me.
So, I'm back on Depo-Provera, which has always worked well for me and stops my periods completely.
However, if your only options are a tubal or an IUD, I would take the IUD (or any non-permanent option).
I had my 2nd child at age 26 and was definitely *done*! Well, lo and behold, 10 years later, I changed my mind. I admit I haven't dealt with clinic depression as you have, but a lot can change in 10-15 years, and IMO this is too big a door to voluntarily close at your age.
Best of luck in your decision. :grouphug:
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A bit OT but...
When I moved to Canada, I found it interesting that they don't call "fake" coffee creamer (you know the powdered or liquid sort that uses chemicals to approximate cream) "non-dairy creamer". They call it "coffee whitener".
I am assuming this is to avoid any misconception that such a product has any relationship whatsoever to actual cream.
"Coffee whitener" isn't a very appetizing term, but I guess that's what it does, and if we thought about what the stuff actually is, we wouldn't find it very appetizing anyway.
I agree, go with coconut, rice or almond milk. They're non-dairy, and they're real food!
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Wow. Another lesson to teach us that there are always others more- and less-fortunate than we are, so be grateful for what we have.
I had also never heard of limited internet access when I lived in the US. Several months after moving to Canada, I discovered that we had a 30GB monthly limit! (apparently, there is no such thing as unlimited internet in Canada :confused:). It was very frustrating to have to limit our use to 1GB per day. We have 3 laptops, dh and I listen to streaming radio most of the day, and the kids are constantly on youtube, downloading games, etc. Having to check our usage every morning and police everyone's usage is a major pain.
We have since switched providers and now have 60GB, which is so much better. But still, we wouldn't even consider NetFlix since it would use up our quota in a jiffy.
I was feeling so sorry for myself, until I read about the posters overseas. Guess I'll stop whining and count my blessings ;).
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UmSami,
I can absolutely speak from experience. Having your dh speak to your kids in his native language is by far the best way for them to learn the language, and the only hope of them having a native accent.
I am actually amazed how many fathers don't bother to just *speak* their native language to their kids, and then start panicking and scrambling when the kids reach school age and have to start studying the language from scratch as a non-native speaker. It is soooo much easier to simply speak to your kids than to invest in multiple language programs that have varying success, but don't usually lead to fluency.
My husband spoke Arabic with all of our children from birth. It was not at all weird, since in the beginning it's just baby talk anyway, and very repetitious. I picked up a few words that way, and our kids began speaking using a mixture of Arabic and English, whichever word was easier for them to say at their age. As they began to truly speak, they had no problem separating Arabic and English in their minds, since one is Mom's language, and the other is Dad's. I also picked up a lot of the language along the way myself, to the point where I can understand the majority of conversations and participate, although I'm sure I make plenty of grammar mistakes.
This method was the most successful with our 1st child, who seems to have a knack for languages anyway. He was completely fluent by age 10. Our 2nd child had an environment where she was speaking English with me *and* her older brother at home all day, so Arabic made up a smaller proportion of her language listening. Still, she understands everything, and speaks quite well, just not as fluently as her brother.
I have to add, that another vital part of this puzzle are trips back to dh's home country and/or frequent encounters with friends and family who speak the language. If they only use the language with dad, they lose their motivation to speak it. If the only Arabic-speakers they know are ones who also speak English, they have no reason to bother responding in Arabic. Discovering that they must use "Dad's" language to communicate with grandparents and cousins with whom they have built a relationship goes a long way toward fluency. One or two month-long trips can do the trick, and then the conversations can continue via Skype.
I'm sure it might feel strange for your dh to begin speaking in Arabic now that the kids are older, and they would likely be resistant to it, since they won't understand. Don't worry about that. Just speak to the baby, and the baby will learn. Without even realizing it, the other kids will hear it and pick up some words as well. If I, as an adult, learned Arabic by osmosis when my dh was speaking to my babies, your kids certainly can.
I know plenty of families with older children who do not speak their father's language, and all involved, parents and children, are disappointed and regretful. When asked why they didn't just speak to their kids in their language when they were small, the fathers simply shrug. There is no reason. It's easy, doesn't cost a thing, and can reap life-long benefits (not to mention avoiding years of conflict and struggle trying to study the language from books or classes).
Tell your dh, no more excuses, just do it ;)
HTH,
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We never had Geography as a separate subject, nor do I recall studying any world geography at all. We were required to memorize the locations of all the states (fill in a blank map) in 8th grade, but that was it. In fact, World History was not even a required subject in HS, but US History was :001_huh:.
This was in a highly regarded, well-funded school district in the late 80s-early 90s, where I received an excellent education otherwise. Perhaps the requirements have since changed.
I learned most of my European history in college, during Spanish Civilization and French Civilization courses (I was a language major), and tied it all together in my mind while working through SOTW with my kids! I now have a much more thorough understanding of the full span of world history than the majority of (non-hsing) people I know.
Interestingly, dh *did* study geography as a separate subject for several years growing up overseas. However, the topic did not interest him, and to this day he has no notion of where countries are located in relation to others. I, with no such instruction to speak of, am much more geographically aware and informed, since I find it fascinating and tend to recall the location of countries once I have found them on a map.
I think this is an important phenomenon to keep in mind as homeschoolers. It doesn't matter which subjects we (or our local PS) "cover", only what sticks. What sticks in a student's mind are topics of interest to him, and those presented in an engaging manner.
This is likely the reason why I was the only student in my class who, after 5 years of French, left HS actually being able to *speak* French--high interest and strong motivation.
My $0.02.
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Thank you :), but I'm afraid I have to insist on a bit more precision: is the Sinai revelation presented as the revelation to the whole nation (as in, everybody heard and experienced God and the first two commandments, while Moses chatted with God about the rest - but importantly, all have experienced it and passed it onto their children, etc.) or as God's private talk with Moses? I'm asking because this issue is of tremendous importance in Judaism, and the whole chain of tradition is really stressed, so I'm asking. :)
Speaking from my basic knowledge on the subject (perhaps there are other Muslims on the board who can offer more precise details), the commandments were revealed to Moses, in the presence of God, on the mount. His nation was left in the spiritual care of his brother, Aaron during his 40 day absence. He then descended the mount and presented the tablets to his people, at which time he discovered they had fashioned a golden calf to worship. So, no, I don't believe there is a view in Islam that the commandments were revealed directly from God to the Israelite nation, but to the prophet Moses, who was charged with delivering the message to his people.
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True.
By the way, I have a question about that.
As you know Judaism doesn't see Abraham as its formative element, i.e. a crucial one, but the giving of Torah on Sinai, the revelation to the whole nation, the unbroken chain of tradition etc. Technically speaking, that's the point of formation of the Jewish nation and religion.
What's Islam's stance on that - is that story a part of the Muslim theological "canon" as well, as one of the previous revelations? (I ask because Islam is based on a revelation to an individual, rather than a nation, so I was curious whether Sinai was accepted to have happened, somehow, in some form or no - and if yes, how is it interpreted?)
Yes, the presentation of the tablets to Moses on the Mount is recounted in the Qur'an (7:142-157), as is the forming of the golden calf by his people, and their resulting repentance. Muslims believe that Moses' scriptures were given to the Jewish people as a nation, while the Qur'an was revealed for all of mankind (including the Jews). Muslims also celebrate "Ashura", which commemorates the Israelites' delivery from Egypt so yes, we do claim much of your religious history as our own ;).
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Totally non snarky question. If you believe Jesus to be a good prophet but that the words Christians believe he spoke were only attributed to him, where does the idea that he was a good prophet come from? If the words attributed from here weren't true then what about Jesus makes him good? Does that make sense?
An honest question which I will do my best to answer. As Ester Maria mentioned, there is a hierarchy of scripture. The Old Testament or Jewish scriptures (which Muslims consider the Torah and Psalms), followed by the New Testament (which Muslims call the Gospel), and finally the Qur'an. Muslims believe that all of these scriptures, in their original forms, came from God. However, over time, the original texts have been lost, changed, added to, translated and retranslated, so that the Bible as we currently know it does not contain exclusively the exact words of God as they were originally revealed.
Therefore, as Muslims, we believe in those portions of earlier scriptures which support and are not in conflict with the message of the Qur'an. As the final message from God to mankind, sent to clarify any misconceptions or adaptations in the earlier scripture, if something in the earlier scriptures goes against God's word in the Qur'an, we presume it to be an addition, deletion or change to the Bible that happened over the years, whether by accident or intentionally to serve a worldly purpose.
In this context, we base our view and beliefs about Jesus (peace be upon him) on the extensive references to him in the Qur'an. Such as him being the Messiah whose coming the Jews were awaiting, that he was the result of a miraculous virgin birth, that he will return to earth during the Last Days, and that he was spared the indignity of being killed on the cross, but that it was only made to appear that way, while he was raised directly to heaven. We believe God is above the carnal relationships of having a wife or son, and that He shares His power with no one. We have no need for a blood sacrifice for our sins, because we believe both Adam and Eve asked for forgiveness for their deeds and were forgiven, and that no human being is punished for the sins of his ancestors, but that each of us is responsible for our own actions. For Muslims, salvation is based on faith, works, and the mercy of God.
I might add that the Christian notions of God having a son, a triune god, blood sacrifice, as well as many Christian holidays were likely unknown concepts to the disciples, and were added later through cultural influences, particularly from the Romans. Perhaps Bill could expand on that topic.
I hope I have answered the question thoroughly, without ruffling too many feathers. I am simply presenting my beliefs, with no presumption that others will agree :)
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I don't know if there is much I can add here, but I will most definitely say that Muslims, Christians, Jews, dare I say even Hindus and other polytheists, worship the same God. There is one God, the Creator, who instilled in us a longing to worship a force greater than ourselves, which is Him. How we go about that, our source of inspiration and guidelines for behavior, our believed path to salvation, even our impression of who our Creator is and His attributes may differ, but that does not change who God is.
We may follow different scriptures, have disagreements about who Jesus (peace be upon him) was, and each of us may believe that our path is the right one and that followers of other religions have been led astray and are not worshiping God in the way He intended. None of this, however, has any effect on the nature of God Himself (and how presumptuous of us as mere humans to imagine that it would!)
So, yes, Muslims worship the same God as Christians. We worship in different ways, our concept of God may differ in some ways, but The One God is just that, to everyone.
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I voted "other" because I divide their toys between their bedrooms and a basement playroom. This is how I have always done it, in every house.
Toys that are their treasured favorites, that are breakable or have easily lost parts, or that they typically play alone or maybe with one friend, basically any toy over which they prefer to have control and supervision, stays in their rooms.
The rest of the toys go in the basement, such as large building sets or marble runs that need a lot of room to construct, physical games and sports equipment, games that require many players, and a few toys they may have outgrown but which we keep around for younger my visitors.
This way, when kids (especially multiple kids) come over, they can go straight to the basement and find something to play with, with no worries that my kids' "special" toys will be lost or broken.
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Optical brighteners do indeed stick to clothing. They reflect light so the clothing "looks" brighter without actually being as clean as they look.
I use Charlie's Soap http://www.charliesoap.com/ to clean my baby's diapers, as well as the rest of our clothing. It is all-natural, has no brighteners or enzymes that can be an issue with other detergents, and is clean-rinsing, leaving no residue, and it cleans well. It is also a family-run business that I feel good about supporting.
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Yes, I saw that. How cool! They also had a "Treasure Island" theme for Robert Louis Stevenson's birthday a while back. A great way to bring classic literature to the masses!
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Nope. Don't care too much for baths either. I suppose if it were a spa situation, where someone else was cleaning the tub, filling and preparing it, and would drain and clean it after, it could be enjoyable. I just don't find anything that labor intensive to be luxurious or relaxing.
Growing up, we only had a tub, a claw-footed one, at that. I took a bath once a week, and enjoyed playing in it with my toys. However, by age 11/12, a once a week bath was not enough, and as we prepared to move to a newer home, I vowed to take a shower every day once we had one ;).
To be honest, I'm not a great fan of either baths or showers, especially in the winter. I love feeling clean, but I hate peeling every layer of clothing off of me, stepping into the freezing tub/shower, washing myself down (and hair-washing is sooo time-consuming!), and then exiting only to have the water start evaporating off my body, freezing yet again, drying off hurriedly and then trying to tug clothing onto my sticky still-damp body. At night? Forget it. I just don't have the energy or the stomach to deal with all that when I'm ready to sleep, and if I do, it leaves me shocked awake and shivering under the covers.
Never saw the appeal of soaking in a tub, or of lingering in a hot shower. Boring, time-wasting, a necessary evil, I guess.
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My first 2 kids were born when I was 23 and 26. My last baby was born a month after my 37th birthday. I must say I never intended to have a baby after 35, and was a bit concerned about being a "higher-risk pregnancy".
I absolutely conceived as quickly/easily as I did the first 2 times. As for the pregnancy itself, I did have a few more symptoms this time around that I hadn't had with the others (nausea in the 1st trimester, slight spotting, a lot of Braxton-Hicks and back pain in the 2nd). However, I don't know if those symptoms had anything to do with my age or the fact that I am much more out of shape now.
My labor and delivery were also exceedingly easier than with my previous pregnancies.
Of course, there is no guarantee that your experience will mimic mine, but at least you can find some encouragement in it :001_smile:
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"Enduring lengthy heated lectures" is NOT a natural consequence.
:iagree: I was not claiming that my reaction in these situations was ideal or preferable. For whatever reason, this type of behavior really pushes my buttons, and just reading about it frustrated me.
Yes, I do believe natural consequences are the best teacher in this case, and that lectures don't typically bear much fruit. I guess I was just trying to make the OP feel better about the situation, that her son obviously had a lesson to learn here, to take some of the sting out of the pain she was feeling for him. I was revealing an aspect of my personality that I am not so proud of in order to tell her she had handled it well, since I wouldn't have been able to be so gracious in her shoes.
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I'm a meanie mom in situations like this. I have no sympathy or patience for kids when they do such stupid things, especially after expressly being told not to.
My dd has the tendency (worse when she was younger) to take the phrase "wait" to mean "go ahead and do it yourself" and she has endured lengthy heated lectures as a result.
I would be extremely upset that he ruined all his hard work and his racing experience due to hard-headed foolish behavior.
I sincerely hope he learns his lesson.
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I would like to jump in and say this is likely a "man" issue, but also a cultural issue.
Yes, guys tend not to "get it", don't understand why cleaning the house before guests arrive is a big deal, think you can just eat "whatever", etc.
At the same time, my dh also comes from a culture where guests are extremely important. In his country, we have been served beautiful meals by people who likely wouldn't be able to buy meat for the rest of the month due to hosting us. A very poor childhood neighbor of my dh gifted me some beautiful cloth, enough to make a formal dress, which she had obviously purchased for herself and likely had to save up for months (a year maybe?) to buy. I have been given shoes off of women's feet simply because I commented that I liked them. None of these people cared that we made 10x as much as them; culturally it was an honor for them to display their hospitality in this way.
That said, I personally freak out any time guests are expected, even with 2 weeks notice. My house is never company-ready, and it takes 2 solid days to get it to a point where I feel I could allow people to see it, then another 2 solid days of cooking. If these are overnight guests, add another day of cleaning.
As you can imagine, this combination has caused conflict. The most important thing is to truly communicate, and discuss this issue outside the heat of the moment, when you can both be objective and truly hear the other person.
Your dh has to come to realize he is living in the US, with an American wife, and some aspects of his culture and/or behavior are unacceptable and considered rude here.
You need to try and understand that some of his self-worth is likely wrapped up in these gracious hostings, and for him, it would be rude to ask for earlier notice, or to tell them you are unavailable, etc.
Then, you have to find a happy medium. Find out what you each are and are not willing to compromise on, and make it work. Believe me, it's not easy. After 20 years, we are 75% of the way toward a solution :tongue_smilie:.
In the meantime, do not change your plans for them. Let your dh host them as he sees fit, and get on with your life. I know, easier said than done, but it's the only way to save your sanity until he realizes how his hospitality is affecting you.
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Well, I certainly won't win with this one, but I still find it hilarious.
In the summer of 2006, we sold our house and cars, put our belongings in storage and lived overseas for a year. I gave away most of my pantry items, but brought a few refrigerated condiments to my mom's house, where we were staying for a couple of months before leaving on our extended trip.
Just last weekend we were visiting my parents and my son decided to make stir-fry. There were two bottles of teriyaki sauce in the fridge, so I told him to finish one before he used the other.
A few minutes later, he brought me the bottle he had just finished. It still had the price sticker on the cover, with the name of the supermarket it was purchased from. You guessed it, it was from my fridge circa 2006 :001_huh:.
Incidentally, my parents date every pantry item they purchase with a sharpie. Now I know why ;).
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I can't stand the bitterness and after-taste, it disrupts my digestive system and makes me terribly jittery.
The smell is OK, and I can "enjoy" a cup in social settings as long as there is plenty of cream and sugar added, but I wouldn't chose to drink it myself.
I actually like most coffee-flavored treats, such as candies and ice cream (probably because plenty of cream and sugar are added ;)!)
In college, I had an early class and was yawning while waiting for the lecture to begin. Someone commented that I must not have had my coffee yet :001_huh:. I replied, "No, it's just early." I never understood how people find it normal to need a stimulant in order to do something as natural as waking up and starting the day. Just not a club I ever wanted to belong to.
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When I had "good" employer-sponsored insurance, a very straightforward delivery with no anesthesia, etc. cost around $3K.
With no insurance, i didn't pay a cent.
In my state, but I am assuming this is the case across the country, there is a Medicaid program for pregnant women. If you are low-income and don't have insurance, all of your prenatal care, delivery fees, postpartum checkup and birth control are covered. Coverage for mom ends 8-10 weeks postpartum, but the baby is typically covered for a year.
I know most people are caught in the middle, having insurance with high deductibles, but not making enough money to pay those deductibles.
I just thought I'd put this option out there as an FYI for those with no insurance at all.
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2010:
- Dh *still* unemployed/attempting to build small business - year 4!
- Due to above, we have enjoyed a year of quality family time, with dh taking a larger role in hsing and household responsibilities
- After enduring the stress and conflict of being together nearly 24/7, we have settled into a true equal partnership, are finally beginning to truly understand how to communicate with each other, and have a stronger, deeper relationship for it
- Dh completed his graduate certificate
- Spent a wonderfully relaxing lakeside family vacation with my parents in July
- Dd and ds collided on their bikes in August, resulting in dd breaking both her wrists, spending the rest of the summer in casts
- My niece was born in September, 1st baby of youngest BIL
- Same BIL diagnosed with MS in December
- Our caboose dd was born in November!
- Dh and ds witnessed the death of a fellow soccer player on the field, same age as dh; life-changing reality check for both of them
2011:
- We all remain healthy and strong in our faith
- Dh finds a source of income that does not make him miserable
- Dh and I will maintain our deep connection, even if a new job ends up taking him away for days at a time
- I will manage to combine caring for a new baby and hsing (a feat that remains elusive at the moment!)
- I will manage to combine caring for a new baby and my afterschool tutoring sessions
- I will succeed in both of the above, and still find time to sleep!
Wishing everyone a blessed 2011!
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:iagree:
I have been using Saving Dinner for years, and it's a life-saver! I have the books, subscribed to their weekly mailer in the past, and ended up buying their one-year download.
A year's worth of menus (in whichever format) literally means a year's worth of dinners, no repeats, for the whole year, including stir-fries, crockpot meals, etc. I also love that there are simple side (usually veggie) suggestions. The grocery list is also already made out for you.
I used to plan my own weekly meals, spending over an hour digging through my recipe files, making sure we had a variety throughout the week (chicken/meat/fish/vegetarian/soup/casserole/crockpot/etc.), and trying not to repeat too often. Then, once the main dish was chosen, I had to come up with a side veggie! Ack!
Now, I have a full year's worth of meals printed, slid into page protectors, in a binder. Every week, I just pull out the next week's menus and look it over. I do tweak some dishes to fit our personal tastes, or substitute a favorite recipe for something we don't care for, but the foundation is there. If I'm too busy, I just follow the plan as-is, and figure, if somebody doesn't like a certain meal, they won't have to eat it again for the rest of the year, so who cares!
I also make notes of my successful tweaks, put stars next to particular favorites, etc., so when the next year rolls around, I don't have to reinvent the wheel.
There are usually free menus to try on the website, so give it a whirl! It has been a lifesaver in my house!
Today is my boys' last day in public school - EVER!
in General Education Discussion Board
Posted
I also appreciate the "reality check". My ds14 will be in 9th grade next year, and I am starting to think I may need to find more "formal" schooling options for him, not only for structure, expectations and accountability, but especially for higher-education opportunities.
I don't want him going to public HS where we are living now, but sometimes I think it wouldn't be too bad for him to attend my former HS (if he stayed with my parents). It has a great reputation, I got a decent education, there are even people who have moved to our district from out of state because of the course offerings. They I find out about girls s*xting boys they barely know and who haven't even shown an interest in them (thinking about my innocent ds), and a boy shot himself to death in the boys' bathroom during exam week (and exams continued as scheduled :001_huh:).
Thank you, thank you for the wake-up call!
I also agree that it is so very important for boys to spend quality time with their father at this age, particularly doing "man" work, learning skills, expending some energy, and building their relationship. Excellent call, excellen timing, pulling them out.
Way to go!