[Help! Can anyone take in a super friendly black kitten? Located in Northern Indiana.]

8 hours ago, MercyA said:

A local TNR group has offered to do a low-cost neuter for him, along with a microchip, shots, vet visit, and flea treatment. I am willing to pay for this, if that helps.

That is awesome! Ask for a dewormer if possible as well.  

[Help! Can anyone take in a super friendly black kitten? Located in Northern Indiana.]

I foster cats and there is a way to transport, I tried to dm you but couldn't.

[Is there a way for us as a society to do better for our elderly and disabled?]

6 hours ago, SKL said:

Scheduling medical appointments is challenging at all ages and income levels.

 

Those with means are not worried that missing a day of work for an appointment will mean their income will drop and they will worry about having enough food.

Those with means will have more options for medical providers, including those closer to their home. 

Those with the means can drive or take private transportation to their appointment vs public transportation. The difference can be 20 minutes vs 90 minutes, and I am being generous in some areas.

Rescheduling a work meeting and spending, maybe an hour of the day, commuting to and from and being seen without the additional worry about food is a HUGE privilege. 

[Is there a way for us as a society to do better for our elderly and disabled?]

Our society does not like people with disabilities. 

[Looks like Red Lobster locations have shut down. They were in trouble financially…]

6 hours ago, Carol in Cal. said:

Glad I have a recipe for their cheese garlic biscuits!

Same. But then that is the only food of theirs I like so I have had it for a while.

[Probate court…..anyone want to commiserate?]

Joining with an ugh 

Hiring an attorney for our cluster from recent death. 

 

[Is it me?]

I am curious why your husband feels the need to be busy taking care of your large property instead of just being busy.

If you all downsized that would free up time and energy to do more direct community work. Working at a soup kitchen, helping with an urban food garden, big brothers and so many other things that will not be as physically demanding but still keep him active and "working".

[Is it me?]

13 hours ago, TexasProud said:

He cannot sit still.  And supposedly, when he works outside or does something it helps to lessen his headaches. 

This stood out to me in multiple ways. I was very very active because it helped reduce my pain, including headaches. Up at 4am level and not stopping until I fell asleep. I did work on my parents property, I planted an orchard, put in and maintained a large garden, and so on. I had to move to keep the pain away. This lasted until my recent health issues. I still need to move to not hurt, it is just much harder now that my body say no.

I would suggest he see a doctor but it sounds like he may be too stubborn.

 

 

[Florida bans lab-grown meat]

1 hour ago, HomeAgain said:

I have to say I'm not a huge fan of Impossible meat, or what it's doing to the restaurant industry.  Not fast food - I couldn't care less about quality or whatnot.  But eat-in establishments used to have more variety in their vegetarian/vegan options that showcased and highlighted the flavors.  Now, most assume that vegans/vegetarians want a meat-like substitute instead of working with plant-based or non-meat options.  We went to WDW last month and I noticed that the type of vegetarian dishes had shrunk quite a bit into mostly 2: tofu and Impossible.  I'm good with the first (my go-to is a tofu bowl at Satul'i ) but I had no interest in getting faux-meat substitute that tells my brain one thing and my stomach another.  It's the same thing locally, so we only go out if I want to eat meat. Otherwise we make better vegetarian at home and call it a day.

I am insanely jealous that at one time the restruants you went to had decent vegan offerings. I was limited to a salad and there was often annoyance about not adding the meat to the bowl of iceberg lettuce. I would have to drive at least 30 minutes for anything else. After my 30 minute drive, places that went beyond salad often just substituted tofu for the meat. My one time at a dedicated vegan restruant and the meal was chili. A bowl of beans with seasoning. A $25 dollar bowl of beans. 

We no longer bother with going out to eat, it's not worth it. 

[Florida bans lab-grown meat]

I didn't know cattle ranching was a thing in Florida.

[Here We Go Round the Mulberry Bush: The May Gardening Thread]

An adulting said I didn't need more flowers. I said he can repay me his college tuition. 

 

In other news my irises keep falling down. Does anyone have any suggestions? They did this last year as well. 

[Thanks]

1 hour ago, Drama Llama said:

This was a 3 p.m. session with a kid friendly painting, targeted at families with children.  But yes, maybe people should have anticipated it.  

The relative absolutely knew people's feelings about drinking and driving.  The new person might not have.  

It sounds like new person picked it up pretty fast and had the decency to not drink anymore. 

 

 

 

[Thanks]

9 hours ago, katilac said:

Family member wasn't the driver to begin with, and grandpa was now the driver for the kid, so it makes no difference if she had some drinks. The kid didn't have any further concerns about them drinking, because grandpa was in the parking lot waiting to drive. 

There's nothing to indicate she was nasty about it, it's not like she told grandpa to take the kid home. 

It doesn't matter if she was nasty or not.

Kid wasn't comfortable. The reason kid wasn't comfortable was the drinking. Kid did solve the problem (go kid!) That adult was upset that Kid wasn't comfortable and called and grandpa came. Then adult drank more. In this specific case I think it would have been prudent for the adult to abstain while with Kid. Why? Because that shows she recognized that her having a drink upset the kid and is willing to forgo drinking that day with Kid. 

Maybe I come from a different view of things. If I was hanging with Kid and I did something that would be otherwise normal adult thing and Kid expressed concerns I would apologize to Kid for making them uncomfortable and refrain from that behavior. I would want Kid to know that I heard them and that I respect them enough to not continue. I, as the adult, feel it is important for me to set an example for listening, respecting their boundaries, and changing my behavior.

[Thanks]

13 hours ago, Drama Llama said:

I don't drink at all.  But my understanding is that alcohol with and without food effect people differently, so I did want to point out that this was wine without food before they got in the car to drive to dinner, and that the kids didn't know that they would stop at one glass.   The non-family member, who would have been the driver, didn't have more wine at the restaurant, but that might have been because they knew Grandpa was in the parking lot.  The family member had several more drinks, but she wouldn't have been the driver.  It's also possible that she drank more because she was angry, or she wanted to show that Grandpa didn't stop her.  

That family member made the choice to drink more after the kid expressed concerns doesn't give me confidence in their ability to make good decisions. It doesn't matter if she drank because she was angry or to show grandpa. If it had been me in their shoes I would have refrained out of respect for the kid's concerns. But then, I don't drink when I am out and about with minors. 

[What are your thoughts about people who have more than one house?]

We have a second home that is in the same area, it will likely be where we move when we downsize in retirement. Now? We have kids renting it for the cost of the mortgage. It is cheaper for them than anyplace else. 

[What are your thoughts about people who have more than one house?]

9 hours ago, SKL said:

I have a friend who bought a house in the city where her daughter is attending college, because she wanted to make sure her kid had someplace safe to go (and she could afford it).  The original idea was for the daughter to find friends on campus who would be good roommates, and then share the space; and to sell the house after graduation.  Not sure how the cost of that plan would compare to the cost of just renting an apartment or using the dorm during those years.

This was very common here 10+ years ago. Buy a (cheap) bigger older house for your student nearish campus. Get roommates to offset the mortgage and utilities to keep their and their students living expenses very low. Sell after they graduate, often for more than they paid. I don't know anyone who didn't come out ahead doing this. When touring colleges we include looking at houses for this reason. 

 

[What is something you’re not so good at that you think most people are good at?]

16 minutes ago, lauraw4321 said:

I cannot make a space (any space) look nice. I don't know how to decorate. How to keep neat and organized. I have no idea what I would like a space to look like. I enjoy being in nicely decorated spaces, but I could never make one. I feel like it's borderline a moral failure in a wife/mom.

This. I will spend hours trying to make it look nice and nothing. At like age 8 one of my kids walked through a space I hadn't been able to anything with and in 30 seconds the area looked incredible.

What magic is that?

[Attention span!]

9 hours ago, SKL said:

I'll keep it short!

I saw an article saying that the average US attention span is now about 47 seconds!

Are there things we can do to increase our own or our teens' attention spans?

Huh. A few decades ago I was told to always keep talks/lessons/lectures under an hour because people cannot manage longer than 60 minutes without thinking about s3x. 

[What is something you’re not so good at that you think most people are good at?]

5 hours ago, KungFuPanda said:

 

I was taught that your right hand is the one you write with and your left hand is the one that’s left. Obviously this doesn’t work for lefties. 🤣

I tell my husband he can remember which way is right when driving because that I, the navigator, am always (on his) right.

 

[What is something you’re not so good at that you think most people are good at?]

15 hours ago, Spryte said:

I don’t do mornings well. Coffee helps.

Choosing paint colors. We are repainting and I cannot decide. Ditto all things involving decorating right now. I used to be solid in my choices, but perhaps more limited in those choices. Now that anything goes, and I don’t have an unchanging anchor point from which to start — it’s taking forever to make decisions.

See. Seriously. I started having trouble with parallel parking, some other issues I saw mentioned above, and it turns out that post-Lyme (but I could have been any illness), my eyes were not working together anymore. VT helps, but I’m 3/4 of the way through and realizing I just don’t see things the same way others do these days. I am relearning, but gaaaaahhhhh. 

I cannot do paint colors at all because I don't see colors the way others do. I am not color blind, but I just cannot see the shades colors if that makes sense. It is always frustrating when people ask me what a color is or talk about a color having a different color undertones. "This grey will match because of the purple undertones." I am like, if you want the purple just paint it purple. 

[Thanks]

Kid was right.

Grandpa was right. 

Other family member was wrong. 

[Thanks]

Just now, Drama Llama said:

That's pretty much what we have told our kids.  One of the kids in our extended family put out exactly that kind of crisis call, so we're dealing with the aftermath here.  

 

Go extended family kid! Buy them an ice cream or whatever kids these days like. Heck, tell them random person on the internet says they were brave and did the right thing. 

 

I hope the rest of the adults involved are supportive of kid

[Thanks]

A very close friend of mine was killed by a drunk driver so my kids know how serious drinking and driving is. 

My kids know that they can call either of us and any of several predetermined family friends at any time no questions asked to be picked up. They also have access to ride share if needed and can use it whenever no questions asked, I don't care how old they are or where they are, I will happily pay for it. 

I want my children, and possibly one day grandchildren, no matter how old, to refuse to get in a car with someone who has been drinking, to the point of calling 911. If they are 9 years old hanging with auntie doing something and auntie decides to drink, I encourage them to raise hell and refuse to go with them. Cops get called? Great, they can deal with the drunk auntie until I get there. Drunk auntie will prefer dealing with the cops to being the focus of my rage anyway.

 

[Unwritten road rules]

Gratitude is expressed frequently, it is so nice when they tell me I am number one! People really live up to the midwest nice here.

As a pedestrian walking in the urban core and obeying all signals I do find that about a third of drivers give salutation with one finger, another third don't seem to see me, even when making eye contact, and the last third seem to view running pedestrians over as a sport. We don't have deer in the city and they have to put food on the table somehow. 

Sadly, even with parallel parking everywhere many drivers simply have no clue what it is or how it works. People are resourceful and when they cannot figure that out they turn to the time honored tradition of just parking in the middle turn lane. This takes less skill AND when you return to your car you get to see all the buses that are on the route, they will even stay still so you can get a good look at the number, and you are given the opportunity to contribute to the cities general revenue fund. So many advantages.

Ahh the zipper merge. This would be great, but I do not wish to die. Did you know that in America if you follow this it can cause other drivers to become enraged? And that the enraged are allowed to carry guns? 

[s/o things that are changing because fewer kids are being born]

2 hours ago, frogger said:

Our school district is trying to close 6 schools but it doesn't matter which schools they close; those parents will freak. It happens every time but we have lost 6000 students since 2010. How can they not close schools? I suppose everyone will just say it should be the other guy's school. 🤷‍♀️

As a young adult I moved to a district that had been shrinking and was shuttering schools. Those buildings sat vacant for years, many still are. I worked with a non profit that wanted to buy one. It didn't matter which building they looked at the district wouldn't sell. They wouldn't even rent them out. They just sat vacant, being broken into and vandalized costing the district who knows how much money.