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StellaM

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StellaM last won the day on September 30

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About StellaM

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  1. Good on your ds! Yes, it's impossible to exert in this smoke. Glad I'm not tasting it in my water - yuck! Good luck over the next couple of days. Hopefully it will be OK.
  2. I think you are wise to ignore the hype and just focus on preparation. It's almost as if catastrophic fire days are now media entertainment. Fingers crossed for you. Hope it's a very boring day.
  3. The smoke haze this morning was awful. It tends to settle overnight, and doesn't lift again till the breeze picks up in the afternoon. I'm supposed to stay indoors when the air quality is so poor, but who can put their life on hold for weeks at a time? It's not fire, but it's damaging to health in the short and long term. https://www.nytimes.com/2019/11/13/climate/climate-change-child-health.html?fbclid=IwAR1Ets99l2OXG5xbyey0z9ZxBrx9AlbbBjW3rM3QFEr5zTJJ2ER9tz0oJOw
  4. It's ' devil and the deep blue sea' - I think the blue devil is just a corruption of the original expression.
  5. Re books, I have my Kindle and one shelf in the bookcase. That's it for my personal reading. And I'm a book lover and reader. I Marie Kondo'ed the bookshelf years ago. I do have three shelves of children's books, and that's OK. Again, they've been culled to the special, the quality, and the 'most memories attached'.
  6. Moving frequently is a great way to discover how much you actually need and want in your life, materially speaking. ~ For Christmas this year, all 3 adults and one teen are getting exactly the same thing - a decent pair of headphones. Not sure I had a handle on minimalism when my kids were younger though.
  7. With adult children (or children at college), I would reframe 'every child deserves' - it's a recipe for guilt in some of us. It's unreachable for many, even if it's true. I think I'd go with something like 'As I am able, I would like to be able to support my child into stable adulthood'. or 'My child deserves a happy mom, and if that can encompass as much coaching as they need, great, but if not, things will likely be OK, because I am not the only person in this world who will give my child a helping hand.'
  8. I have considerably more tolerance at this point in time for the educating/child caring I get paid to do, than that which I don't. And ya know, I don't even care if that makes me a bad mum. I'm too tired to care, lol.
  9. Homeschool mum 16 yrs I actively do NOT want to be the person who my college aged kid with dyscalculia calls. I don't want her to hash out her essays with me. I don't want to have her relying on me to help her through her stats assignments. I don't want it, because I'm burned out, and because it isn't some sort of natural progression for us. Of course I provided some hand-holding in the first semester, and she knows that if she's really tight on time, I'll run an eye over an assignment, but I am happy that this is minimal. I expect it to be even more minimal in third year than it was in second year. By the time she's in honours year, I expect it to be nothing or as close to as to make no difference. My kids were intensively, seriously, and fully parented and educated by me for a huge chunk of my adult life. It's OK to reach a point of being done. *obligatory disclaimer - it's also OK to not be done, and to help in ways that benefit you and your kids for as long as that both works for you. But it's not some homeschooler vs brick and mortar schooler thing! Even dedicated and loving homeschooling parents with kids with learning challenges can reach a point of being finished.
  10. Yeah, look, it's OK to be a person who is mentally exhausted and cannot, for her own sanity, do the amount of coaching some people are able to do. You are a person, not a mom-function. I know this is not a level of coaching I could provide long-term because of mental and emotional exhaustion. I literally can't, without killing myself. Everyone's family is different, everyone's life experiences are different, and frankly, you sound like you are doing fine to me. And your dd is doing OK. Don't buy yourself grief about what things might look like in 10 years time; you don't need to be anywhere but here, with dd in 6th grade, atm, and the two of you did just fine. That's all and that's enough.
  11. Many years ago, we did blended stuff. It was terrible. My in-laws (who I don't see or speak to anymore) made me cringe constantly. I can't even think of it without wanting to run out of the room screaming. But yours might be better! I think it probably depends on the social skills and flexibility of both sides of the family.
  12. I mean, I guess that's the point of scaffolds - you fade them. There's only a difference, really, in when you fade them. I'd agree with the age thing. Eldest is undiagnosed but likely is dealing with autistic traits (bad mom didn't know anything about autism in girls when she was a girl, sadly). I mentally subtract a couple of years from her social age. Not because she's immature - she is very mature - but because it helped me not get in the way of her getting herself somewhere near speed.
  13. Yeah, dd is like that. I knew she needed the light scaffolding, because she was accepting it, but she refused it as soon as she could. But again, no EF issues with dd, so the risk of letting her go was relatively low.
  14. Which has to be OK, in the end, unless we have magic that can compel students to make a different choice. What's been interesting in this thread is getting a different perspective, though, on the value of failure. My personal perspective on failure is shaped by giftedness and perfectionism - an internal taboo against failure that took till my 40's to face, overcome and change (through, yep, 'failure'). However, I think it's good for me to remember that kids with LD's have plenty of experience of 'failure' and they may not need the same lessons someone like me needed (more failure). Anyway, interesting.
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