How did you manage to get a master's degree when you have the kids to look after, if you don't mind me asking? Trying to get my head around the logistics.

Right, well that's decided then! I will start on the GED ASAP. That sounds like a more reasonable option Quill, what do you think I could study at CC though that would be worth the investment? I would consider vocational courses if I can see that they'd be worth the investment. But perhaps we'd be better off saving money so that in an emergency I'd have enough to live on while completing training? That way the qualification would be fresh. Nice to see another fellow planner! I'm going to have to put together a parenting reading list. Thank you.

Great ideas, thank you. We have discussed parenting and many of the questions you pose above. He told me that since he does not have time to research these topics and he knows that I am researching these topics that he trusts my judgement. So it seems that I implicitly have authority in this area of our relationship. From what I can see, the authoritative (not authoritarian) parenting style looks good to me. Setting high expectations, and setting some rules where necessary, and explaining to the child why they exist.

You know, I think I will get some type of GED or alternative. From what I can see our state doesn't require any qualifications to homeschool. But it's low hanging fruit, and will help prepare me to homeschool too. I have not heard about CLEP tests, no.

Thank you for your encouragement and honesty BlsdMama. I am glad I started this thread. Absolutely. It's good to know which expectations are realistic, and which aren't, and to be able to prepare in the best way that I can.

Yes the idea of getting into debt for a degree that I don't intend to use is also very off-putting. Not to mention investing 5 years of my time into getting it (I didn't graduate high school, so would have to do that too). I would consider completing some other form of training though if, 1. I could use it even during plan A, 2. it's affordable, practical, and not so time consuming that it would delay plan A. I have considered going to college before, of course. I could never find any major that I had an interest in studying for 4 years straight. Those I know who went to college to study topics they loved came out fatigued by that topic. College just looks like a massive time and money sink to me, and even having a degree doesn't guarantee a job in hard times. Sure, it makes it easier, but maybe investing that 5 years and a ton of cash/debt into putting away $100k in savings would be better spent for someone in my situation.

Lucky for me I cannot stand clutter so I naturally purge items on a regular basis. If you need help with this, I'd suggest a great book called The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo. I'm sorry to hear that so many on this forum, and friends of people who have responded above, have been struggling financially. I know there are other forums out there that help people with this topic, but do you think it might be beneficial to have an area of this forum dedicated to discussing money management and earning cash? Considering that so many people have brought it up as a vital topic to consider when homeschooling or being a SAHM perhaps that would be helpful. One idea that comes to mind for an income source for HS SAHMs would be authoring books and self publishing them on Amazon. Over the years you can publish several books and make a nice little income check from Amazon each month. There are so many possibilities. Not only that, but we could discuss methods of budgeting (eg: EveryDollar.com) and books/methods of personal finance.

Those are very sensible suggestions. Thank you Luuknam. I'm sorry to hear about the bipolar and the autism.

That is really helpful. Thank you Patty.

Yes, I'm the same way. I love planning, and even if things change that's okay, it's just time to start planning something else. Planning also helps me spot potential roadblocks and pitfalls and then find ways to avert them. It's like going on a road trip, you make a plan of where you want to end up and what you want to see along the way. Maybe along the way your car breaks down, but that's not a good reason to avoid planning your trip! I appreciate what people are saying about sometimes babies take longer than expected, so I think it is good advice to focus on preparing financially because even if babies don't come for a decade or ever it's good to be financially prepared. However, I have been reading about this, and most people do get pregnant in the first year. We are both young enough, and healthy that I don't think it's likely we will encounter any problems with this (purely from a statistical standpoint). But yes, it's a possibility.

Well, honestly I just think the state education system is inadequate. I also think it's healthier for children to have more guidance from their parents than the typical 2 parent working family sending their kids to school can realistically give. In short, I think it's in the best interests of the kids to be homeschooled if they have a proficient enough parent to do it. Having said that, if one of my kids does decide that he or she would like to go to school I'll support them in that.

I don't need to be the breadwinner. I suggested that in response to someone who was worried about what we would do if my husband was unable to work. We'd definitely be able to put more money aside for emergencies if I was working part time from home too though. Worst case scenario I'd somehow become a single mom and have to send the kids to school and work weekdays, but surely every family faces that possibility? It's just a risk you have to take.

No.

Don't worry. It's not that he doesn't want me to work outside the home. It's because I want to home school that I'm planning to be a SAHM. He doesn't mind either way. I could give you all of the reasons that I'm sure we won't break up, but they wouldn't mean much because you've heard them all before from couples who later divorced. Yes, I recognize that there are risks involved. All we can do is to try to mitigate the risks (which we will do, especially after hearing all of these scare stories!). I don't want to put off having children for any longer than I already have so I don't have time to go get a 5 year degree nor to establish a conventional career. He has an established career, he's very hardworking, loyal, intelligent, has traditional values, and he's not a promiscuous person, nor is he abusive in any way.

Thanks for the tip Katie.

Thanks Katie. Why is that? What situations would it be useful in?

For me having kids is more important than being wealthy, so I'm willing to make the sacrifices. But financial security (totally different thing to being wealthy) is important to me so I'm glad forum members here have brought it up. It clearly needs to be a priority for us and I will be sure to work on a plan regarding this. Yes, I have exceeded my fiancé's income before (to his dismay). To do so consistently is the untested part. But if he was disabled he could stay at home and look after the kids and I could go and do another job that I do have training in and have achieved a full time income for previously. (Come to think of it, I could do this second job on weekends.) Don't worry, I'm not expecting this to be a walk in the park. I do think, however, that with the right planning and preparation that it's doable. For every horror story there's a success story. All of my female grandparents and great grandparents (and probably theirs before them) were stay at home moms without college degrees and it worked out fine. What's changed that this position in life has become so precarious? It's a shame that being a full time mother is now considered to be such a risky endeavor. I expected that homeschoolers would primarily be stay at home moms. Am I incorrect in assuming that?

I'd rather not go into too many details for privacy reasons, but I will say that I certainly have learned a lot since I was 14! Just not from formal education. I'm self taught. It's a very niche thing. I have the ability to exceed my husband to be's corporate salary if needed. The only problem is that the income isn't consistent so savings are a must if we're ever going to rely on it. Definitely doable though if I can create a schedule that allows for it with the kids. And of course, pre-kids I can go all out if cash is really the thing that I need to prioritize.

I see there are many responses about money and financial security. Thanks for the warning. You've inspired me to make it my goal to cover our overheads with the money I make by working from home, and then we can use my husband's income to put in college funds, savings, retirement etc. I actually feel guilty even about the idea of working from home believe it or not, because I know that I'll have to ignore my kids while I'm doing it. So I'll have to find some way to occupy them while I'm working.

So many ideas! Thank you all. I'm making a list of all of them to sort through and prioritize.

I'm getting married in a few months, and will be a stay at home wife (ie: someone with time on her hands) for the next year or so until our first child is born. I'm looking for ways that I can best use this time to prepare myself for parenting and homeschooling. I'm not as well educated as I'd like to be. I had a very poor schooling experience and stopped paying attention all together around age 14. Most of what I've learned has been self taught, 'as needed' and there are gaps in my education. So perhaps I should focus on learning before I attempt to start teaching? We're intending to have many children, so parenting, homeschooling, and housekeeping will be my full time job for decades to come. It seems to be a good idea for me to use this free time wisely while I still have it to make things go better later on when I'm short on time. I'd also like to know which parenting method (if you use a particular one) you prefer and why. What would you suggest I invest this time in to best prepare myself?

Ha, yes. We're undecided on this one actually. Will read up on the pros and cons. We're pretty sure we're going to go with a planned home-birth with assistance from a midwife and hospital as backup, breastfeeding, intact, and minimal vaccination. If there are other topics I should be looking into please let me know. Yes, I'd love to get some recommended resources on these topics. Maybe I should make another thread requesting recommendations? Parenting style is something I'm undecided on. I wish there was more science on the impact of parenting style on children (positive). Most of it seems to be focused on the damage that abusive parenting causes, which is of course important to study, but for conscientious non-abusive parents to be isn't all that useful. Thank you for all of the responses! My takeaway from this thread is that babies and toddlers need lots of attention, interaction, involvement in daily activity, and to hear conversation, speaking, and reading often. I'll be sure to come and ask here what toys and furniture etc. to buy when we get near to that stage. I've been listening to the audiobook of the third edition (forth wasn't available to me, but I'll buy it for reference later) of TWTM while doing housework today and one of the ideas I really like is singing the alphabet every time you do a diaper change. I think little rituals like that can really help instill useful knowledge for later use.

Thank you, Jenne and Maize! That answered my question.

Hello, I'm new here and I'm looking forward to getting to know everyone. I don't have children yet, but I'm planning to have some soon. I'm 90% certain that I want to home school, so I'm looking for the method that I think will work best for us and I'm educating myself on how to go about it. Having looked at some of the materials offered by WTM, I suspect that I'll be learning almost as much from the homeschooling program as my children will! Saffron

Hi, I'm new here. I ran a search on the forum but couldn't find an answer to this question. Sorry if it's already answered somewhere else. My question is: What's the best method to take with very young children, below the age of 3? Should there be any effort to educate them, or to give them structure? Or, is unstructured play best? What is age appropriate at 6 months, 1 year, and 2 years?