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LTOW 1 - request for more examples [x-posted]


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#1 Targhee

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Posted 02 March 2017 - 04:10 PM

We are working through LTOW 1 with my oldest. Currently we are on Essay 4, where it discusses amplification in the conclusion. I was wondering if anyone else would be willing to share examples of amplifications from their student's writing? I believe she understands the idea, but just needs some more concrete examples. I thought peer writing would be the best (rather than things like Atticus' closing arguments and MLK's "I Have a Dream" speech, which are too removed from her current skills).

#2 TarynB

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Posted 03 March 2017 - 05:43 PM

My son is taking LTOW 1 right now (outsourced). I asked him if he could help. Here's what he said:

 

Amplification makes our argument more persuasive and more emphatic. It addresses "who cares?" and "why?"'

 
Here is one of his amplifications on an essay about The Giver (I'm hoping this will help, but if your DD hasn't read that particular book it may not mean much, so I will ask DS to find another example if this one isn't clear, just let me know).
 
"This decision matters to Jonas because if he had not accepted the career he was offered, he would have been re-assigned to “laborer.” This would have led to a harsh, short, and back-breaking life for Jonas."
 
If you'd like to hear more from DS, a different example, or the complete essay that he wrote about The Giver, just let me know, and we'll try to help.

Edited by TarynB, 03 March 2017 - 05:44 PM.


#3 Targhee

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Posted 03 March 2017 - 07:10 PM


My son is taking LTOW 1 right now (outsourced). I asked him if he could help. Here's what he said:

Amplification makes our argument more persuasive and more emphatic. It addresses "who cares?" and "why?"'

Here is one of his amplifications on an essay about The Giver (I'm hoping this will help, but if your DD hasn't read that particular book it may not mean much, so I will ask DS to find another example if this one isn't clear, just let me know).

"This decision matters to Jonas because if he had not accepted the career he was offered, he would have been re-assigned to “laborer.” This would have led to a harsh, short, and back-breaking life for Jonas."

If you'd like to hear more from DS, a different example, or the complete essay that he wrote about The Giver, just let me know, and we'll try to help.

Thank you very much! This is great!
  • TarynB likes this