First Paragraph....

[TXMary2]

Up until now, my 8 year old hasn't really written his own sentences. I have always fed them to him when he wants to write something. By that I mean, he rambles, I simplify his rambling, write them down, and he copies. Other than that he has done copy work and summarizing via WWE, but I put it aside because honestly, it is too painful to go through with him. He can answer comprehension questions with the right answers, but answering in a complete sentence, or expressing himself in a sentence that makes sense seems to be too difficult for him. He is generally a smart kid, so why am I so annoyed by him when it comes to writing??

 

Today he wrote his first paragraph. After weeks of discussing what a good paragraph is, reading paragraphs, identifying main ideas/topic sentences, today was finally the day to write a paragraph. Here it is:

 

"Baseball is a fun sport. It's fun to hit a ball with a bat. You can catch a ball with a glove. It's fun to tag out runners. It's fun to run through home base. In the game you can hit a home run. Baseball is my favorite sport because it is fun."

 

Am I expecting too much from his first paragraph? He's 8 and we are doing mostly third grade curriculum/lessons. I have a headache after today's experience. I still had to coach him to get it to make this much sense. He did do the indentation, all his spelling was right, and so was his punctuation. I am pleased with that.

 

Edited to add: I think I am expecting too much from him. When he says baseball is fun, I am thinking he should say things like, "The crack of the bat hitting the ball is exciting." or "I love to hear the crowd cheer when I slide in to home base."

Edited September 27, 2012 by TXMary2

[mytwomonkeys]

i think it looks fine for the beginning of 3rd grade. to make you feel better, i'll share my son's first paper this year (which also required hand holding... including an outline, rough draft, and the final copy, lol)...

 

How to Play Tag

 

 

Tag is a fun game to play! You need a place to run and some friends.

 

First, choose who's it. Next, choose a base where players can run to. Then the person that is "it" counts while everyboby runs. When he catches that person then he is it. Finally, the game continues until everyone runs out of energy.

 

Tag is an awesome game to play! You should try it!

 

 

 

 

As you can see, my son misspelled words, inserted information that was unnecessary, his paper lacked clear description, etc. It was his first paper though, so I'm happy. By the end of the year I'm sure our kids will be doing great!!:) No worries!!

[TXMary2]

Thank you.

[Cosmos]

Up until now, my 8 year old hasn't really written his own sentences. I have always fed them to him when he wants to write something. By that I mean, he rambles, I simplify his rambling, write them down, and he copies. Other than that he has done copy work and summarizing via WWE, but I put it aside because honestly, it is too painful to go through with him. He can answer comprehension questions with the right answers, but answering in a complete sentence, or expressing himself in a sentence that makes sense seems to be too difficult for him. He is generally a smart kid, so why am I so annoyed by him when it comes to writing??

 

Today he wrote his first paragraph. After weeks of discussing what a good paragraph is, reading paragraphs, identifying main ideas/topic sentences, today was finally the day to write a paragraph. Here it is:

 

"Baseball is a fun sport. It's fun to hit a ball with a bat. You can catch a ball with a glove. It's fun to tag out runners. It's fun to run through home base. In the game you can hit a home run. Baseball is my favorite sport because it is fun."

 

Am I expecting too much from his first paragraph? He's 8 and we are doing mostly third grade curriculum/lessons. I have a headache after today's experience. I still had to coach him to get it to make this much sense. He did do the indentation, all his spelling was right, and so was his punctuation. I am pleased with that.

 

Edited to add: I think I am expecting too much from him. When he says baseball is fun, I am thinking he should say things like, "The crack of the bat hitting the ball is exciting." or "I love to hear the crowd cheer when I slide in to home base."

 

Hi Mary,

 

First off, I wanted to say that your story sounds SO much like my son. We went through the exact same exercise of "learning paragraphs" when he was in third or maybe even fourth grade. Weeks of graphic organizers and topic sentences and stuff. And his paragraphs sounded JUST like your son's. And I despaired.

 

I'm not convinced that this type of writing exercise is all that helpful for beginning writers. I've been doing lots and lots of research about writing. And nearly every source I've read begins, not with expository writing, but with narrative and description. A narrative is telling a story in chronological order. I'm sure you know what a description is. This is in many, many systematic writing programs (all the way from Writing With Skill, a middle-school program, up to college writing handbooks). Only after narrative and description have been thoroughly practiced do they move on to expository writing.

 

So the type of paragraph in which you state a "thesis" and then give reason to support it, though we often think of that as the most basic type of paragraph, is actually rather advanced.

 

He clearly got the concepts you were teaching, and he can throw together a paragraph that fits the formula. Call it a home run. ;) You have tons of time to work on lively prose style, and sophisticated sentence structure, and smooth transitions. A lot of that will come with time and maturity, and the rest you'll be able to teach him.

 

Personally, I would strongly recommend going back to narration and summarizing. You said he has trouble with putting his thoughts into words. I think that is where you should put your energy.

[TXMary2]

Hi Mary,

 

First off, I wanted to say that your story sounds SO much like my son. We went through the exact same exercise of "learning paragraphs" when he was in third or maybe even fourth grade. Weeks of graphic organizers and topic sentences and stuff. And his paragraphs sounded JUST like your son's. And I despaired.

 

I'm not convinced that this type of writing exercise is all that helpful for beginning writers. I've been doing lots and lots of research about writing. And nearly every source I've read begins, not with expository writing, but with narrative and description. A narrative is telling a story in chronological order. I'm sure you know what a description is. This is in many, many systematic writing programs (all the way from Writing With Skill, a middle-school program, up to college writing handbooks). Only after narrative and description have been thoroughly practiced do they move on to expository writing.

 

So the type of paragraph in which you state a "thesis" and then give reason to support it, though we often think of that as the most basic type of paragraph, is actually rather advanced.

 

He clearly got the concepts you were teaching, and he can throw together a paragraph that fits the formula. Call it a home run. ;) You have tons of time to work on lively prose style, and sophisticated sentence structure, and smooth transitions. A lot of that will come with time and maturity, and the rest you'll be able to teach him.

 

Personally, I would strongly recommend going back to narration and summarizing. You said he has trouble with putting his thoughts into words. I think that is where you should put your energy.

 

 

Thank you so much. I think we will be picking WWE up where we left off.