Back to homeschool meltdown?

[Hwin]

We started school on Saturday, and little guy has a baby brother on the way. Is this enough to trigger the biggest fit ever? He is five, and was in a preschool aged church program. By the time I arrived to remove him from class, he was too far gone for reasoning or consequence to have any effect. Getting him to the car involved two people, plus kicking, screaming, choking himself, and punching my face (I had to choose between kicks to the stomach or smacks to my face.)

 

He was in Children's Church and apparently they weren't doing the activity he expected, and he fell to pieces. I tried to talk about it with him at the end of the day. He felt bad about it, but couldn't really explain other than "they were doing something different."

 

Honestly, he's very impulsive but usually his frustration is never this hard to handle - if he melts down, it's because he wanted something, and we shut him down without any explanation. (recent example - we bought microwave popcorn. The fancy brand is in a green box, the generic brand is in a red box. He wanted the green. I grabbed the red. He started to melt down. We simply explained that the red box didn't cost as much money, and we don't have lots of money for popcorn. My son was then completely fine...)

 

I feel blindsided and not sure what to expect next week at church. I'm wondering if maybe this is part of a transition back to homeschooling. Hoping, really. I need a reason!

[Verity]

As I was reading your story I kept thinking how that resistance to change of any kind was one keystone of my oldest son as a child and even now to some degree. At the bottom you have him listed as an "Aspie" 5 year old, has he been "formally" diagnosed? Admittedly it is difficult with a young child.

 

I'm sorry to hear that he had that kind of meltdown - it's really difficult especially when you are concerned that he is hurting himself or you and your new baby. Does the church school know about his diagnosis and are they working with you and making accomodations to help him?

 

I find even now that I take alot of time explaining to my oldest son what to expect, what is appropriate reaction, how he should respond to myself and others when he is uncomfortable and generally giving him space to deal with his emotions. Even high functioning autism is a real challenge in managing every day life.

 

All of the changes (school starting, new baby on the way) would be expected to cause outbursts from most children and even more from ones with Aspergers or ASD.

 

Love and hugs to you both!

[Hwin]

Thanks :) He does have a formal diagnosis (at 2 yrs 4 mos, a bit young, but it's been confirmed again and again). THANK GOD the church is aware, supportive, and equipped to deal with all kinds of special needs. Most of the time, I do not even see the autism. Everyone talks about how far he's come and I start to put it behind me.

 

You know, he also had to stop going to a beloved preschool program on Wednesday, and he had his last day with his Occupational Therapist on Thursday, due to aging out of services. I guess he's had more than his fair share of transition this week :(