:lurk5:

I knew I would get great ideas and I promise we have tried some of these. But hearing from this group and getting a good list (multiple votes) just makes me so much surer about what we do and where we should go next. Thanks again for taking the time.

I knew I would get great ideas and I promise we have tried some of these. But hearing from this group and getting a good list (multiple votes) just makes me so much surer about what we do and where we should go next. Thanks again for taking the time.

I knew I would get great ideas and I promise we have tried some of these. But hearing from this group and getting a good list (multiple votes) just makes me so much surer about what we do and where we should go next. Thanks again for taking the time.

I have another question for the group. My second child (boy - 3 years and 3 months old) is at the point where I feel I need to start some sort of formal learning/ work. Until now we have been reading to him everyday; playing with duplos, cars, trains; used leapfrog dvds, and take him outdoors - park, pool, etc whenever we can. I would like to get ideas on what/ where would be a good place to start for math,reading and writing. I have looked at HWT and like it. I have used AAS with my older daughter (7 years old) and thought I could use their AAR program with my 3 year old. Confused about my options with math. We did not use any formal math curriculum for our daughter when she was young and now we use Miquon and Singapore during summer and winter breaks (to supplement school) so would like to know if these programs are good for the preschool years as well. Any other thoughts/ directions/ advice/ critiques would help - thanks!

I have another question for the group. My second child (boy - 3 years and 3 months old) is at the point where I feel I need to start some sort of formal learning/ work. Until now we have been reading to him everyday; playing with duplos, cars, trains; used leapfrog dvds, and take him outdoors - park, pool, etc whenever we can. I would like to get ideas on what/ where would be a good place to start for math,reading and writing. I have looked at HWT and like it. I have used AAS with my older daughter (7 years old) and thought I could use their AAR program with my 3 year old. Confused about my options with math. We did not use any formal math curriculum for our daughter when she was young and now we use Miquon and Singapore during summer and winter breaks (to supplement school) so would like to know if these programs are good for the preschool years as well. Any other thoughts/ directions/ advice/ critiques would help - thanks!

I have another question for the group. My second child (boy - 3 years and 3 months old) is at the point where I feel I need to start some sort of formal learning/ work. Until now we have been reading to him everyday; playing with duplos, cars, trains; used leapfrog dvds, and take him outdoors - park, pool, etc whenever we can. I would like to get ideas on what/ where would be a good place to start for math,reading and writing. I have looked at HWT and like it. I have used AAS with my older daughter (7 years old) and thought I could use their AAR program with my 3 year old. Confused about my options with math. We did not use any formal math curriculum for our daughter when she was young and now we use Miquon and Singapore during summer and winter breaks (to supplement school) so would like to know if these programs are good for the preschool years as well. Any other thoughts/ directions/ advice/ critiques would help - thanks!

I appreciate all of the comments, hugs, support and advice. All of the suggestions make sense and I will surely be re-reading the "have you filled your bucket" book this weekend - we read it a few months ago but this would be good time to revisit. All of your comments really provide me with a good perspective on the issue as I really don't want to make too much about it but at the same time there was something about the episode that hurt so thank you for understanding. . These forums are my go to place (husband and friends actually come next) when I need help - thank you for your support.

I appreciate all of the comments, hugs, support and advice. All of the suggestions make sense and I will surely be re-reading the "have you filled your bucket" book this weekend - we read it a few months ago but this would be good time to revisit. All of your comments really provide me with a good perspective on the issue as I really don't want to make too much about it but at the same time there was something about the episode that hurt so thank you for understanding. . These forums are my go to place (husband and friends actually come next) when I need help - thank you for your support.

I was a little disturbed by an incident that happened yesterday at my daughters school. My 6 year old daughter (our first) attends school at one the areas best all girls private school and I afterschool on most days . We live in a suburb in Texas and hence made the decision to not go with the public school in our area. The private school is 45 minutes away from our home and the fees is high but my husband and always agreed on giving our children the best education we possibly could. Okay so yesterday I picked her up at carpool and she told that an incident happened at recess that was on her mind all day after that. A bunch of girls from her class showed her a note with her name on it and it read "I hate your tiny little butt" and it was signed in the name of another girl in her class (lets call her AA). Now the bunch of girls asked my daughter to write a similar note back to the girl whose name was on the note. My daughter said she would not do that as its not the right thing to do (so proud of her). So my daughter decided to not tell anyone else in her class about it and went back in after recess. But one of the girls from the bunch brought the note up in front of AA and AA denied writing it and my daughter said she believed her. Later in the day one of the girls from the bunch (lets call her BB) owned up to writing the note, said she was sorry and also that actually someone else asked her to do it. Once I heard the entire episode I asked my daughter what she did with the note and if she told her teacher about it. My daughter said that she did not want anyone else to see the note and so she threw it and since BB had said sorry she did not want to do anything more about it. I still thought the matter had many concerning aspects and so I talked to the teacher about it and she said she would not take names but will discuss the matter with the class. I know things like this happen and its not a big deal but when daughter was telling about the episode I could totally imagine her little face as she read and internalized the note and all the drama around it. I know she was embarrassed and sad for this to happen and also that it happened at the hands of her classmates who she trusts. Learning that she cannot trust everybody is an important lesson but I felt that it took away a little bit of the child in her and that made me sad. I am sorry if this is just a long vent but I wish schools and parents could truly inculcate the good values and the virtues which I think are the most important aspects of providing an education.

I was a little disturbed by an incident that happened yesterday at my daughters school. My 6 year old daughter (our first) attends school at one the areas best all girls private school and I afterschool on most days . We live in a suburb in Texas and hence made the decision to not go with the public school in our area. The private school is 45 minutes away from our home and the fees is high but my husband and always agreed on giving our children the best education we possibly could. Okay so yesterday I picked her up at carpool and she told that an incident happened at recess that was on her mind all day after that. A bunch of girls from her class showed her a note with her name on it and it read "I hate your tiny little butt" and it was signed in the name of another girl in her class (lets call her AA). Now the bunch of girls asked my daughter to write a similar note back to the girl whose name was on the note. My daughter said she would not do that as its not the right thing to do (so proud of her). So my daughter decided to not tell anyone else in her class about it and went back in after recess. But one of the girls from the bunch brought the note up in front of AA and AA denied writing it and my daughter said she believed her. Later in the day one of the girls from the bunch (lets call her BB) owned up to writing the note, said she was sorry and also that actually someone else asked her to do it. Once I heard the entire episode I asked my daughter what she did with the note and if she told her teacher about it. My daughter said that she did not want anyone else to see the note and so she threw it and since BB had said sorry she did not want to do anything more about it. I still thought the matter had many concerning aspects and so I talked to the teacher about it and she said she would not take names but will discuss the matter with the class. I know things like this happen and its not a big deal but when daughter was telling about the episode I could totally imagine her little face as she read and internalized the note and all the drama around it. I know she was embarrassed and sad for this to happen and also that it happened at the hands of her classmates who she trusts. Learning that she cannot trust everybody is an important lesson but I felt that it took away a little bit of the child in her and that made me sad. I am sorry if this is just a long vent but I wish schools and parents could truly inculcate the good values and the virtues which I think are the most important aspects of providing an education.

Thank you again for taking the time and sharing so openly. This forum surely taught me a little more about this group and will also help me keep things in perspective.

It really does feel good to read about all of these experiences especially because I grew up in India and some things were quite different. Thanks for sharing you thoughts. Its great to see how reading, trips to the library, love for the books features in some many stories.

We will wait to hear from you . . .

I know that we all try our best and learn something new about parenting, our kids and ourselves from our interactions here and outside. I thought that it would a good idea to share what you think was the one thing that you parents did that made a big difference in your life. Let me start with what I think worked well for me - growing up my mum helped me fine some real good friends. She made special effort to get to know who my friends were (without being nosy). Ours was the house that always had the best snack, creative projects, etc. My mum really guided me (very subtle) in identifying who my real friends were. Once I had a good set of friends I think her job got much easier as my peer group help me make some real big positive decisions in life.

As always thank you for the suggestions - will surely check out some of the suggestions. I agree that we don't need to choose one or the other (academics/ athletics vs values/ character) and in fact they both need to come in to ensure success, happiness, or whatever we aspire for out kids. My comment really wants to highlight that in the times we live today we can offer a lot to our kids but we need to keep the core stuff. I see kids that are lot more fragile and dissatisfied even though they are so privileged - not to say all kids are like that. On the sibling rivalry I think simplifying our home has helped quite a bit. We have downsized the books/ toys/ activities we have on display and that has taken away some of the wanting to own tendency. Somehow the toys that have been left behind are legos/ blocks/ art supplies/ train tracks/ play kitchen and I see that there is less tendency to fight over these toys as one there are many units for these and so more kids can play with these even if they play with them in parallel as opposed to with each other.

Do you feel that we as parents today are doing more and more to push academics and even sports/ arts (but with some sort of purpose) at the expense of core values and behavior. I see some very high achieving kids but they seem over sensitive or demanding. What are some of the things/ books you have used that has helped with molding their behavior and core values. I have a 2 kids DD(6.5) and son (2.5) and off late I have noticed that are always claiming things or vying to getattention away from the other and I want guide them through this so that they don't look at each like that.

Thank you for all your thoughts and experiences. The idea about reading up on it makes complete sense - I did read the absorbent mind and found some very good information in it. Does anybody have other suggestions? I have also had a chance to observe primary classes (3-6) at about 5 schools now and I think that has helped me understand the method as well as how its being implemented a lot better now. My experience so far has shown that schools affiliated with AMI seem to follow the philosophy in a more true sense. Also the schools with AMI had some very experienced teachers. Which brings me to my next learning which is the experience and personality of the teacher is very critical - the teachers need to know when to let go or pull the child in and that is not an easy dance.

First let me start by saying that I have been a silent observer on these forums as I had so much to take in and learn from some very passionate, hardworking and compassionate people. Not only do you have big insights but have big hearts as well to encourage others and to share what you have learned. I wanted to check if anyone of you have looked into the montessori philosophy for preschool years? I get the whole bit about it teaching children to be independent, responsible, sensitive but not sure how it shapes your approach to thinking as well as drills some core academic concepts. Thanks again for all that you teach me.