wendyroo
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Posts posted by wendyroo
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My brother is planning to get my kids the cooperative card game Ravine.
I know nothing about it other than that my brother played it with a group if friends and deemed it acceptable for my kids.
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8 minutes ago, Ottakee said:
our doctor has said that the earlier and quicker you get them stabilized the better…..sorta like a diabetic. Early treatment and close monitoring of the insulin makes for much better outcomes than waiting longer and not dialing it in. Not a great example but all I can think of now
This is the route we have taken with my kids. We started ADHD and anxiety meds for all of them somewhere between 5 and 6...right about the time they were transitioning from preschool classes and expectations and theories of mind, and they were starting to suffer academically, emotionally, behaviorally and socially from their delays and deficits and growing anxieties.
With two of my kids (who ended up with ASD and ODD/DMDD diagnoses), that was not enough to stabilize them even at that age, so at 7 they were on Risperidone as well, because our psychiatrist feels strongly that early stabilization is crucial to get kids to a place from which they can grow and develop coping strategies.
Unfortunately, with Elliot that has not worked, because even at 12, on a cocktail of psychotropic drugs, he is not safe or stable. And that lack of stability means that my two younger kids now have PTSD diagnoses from the trauma of living in a house with Elliot's violence. Instability can have just as many long-term consequences and side effects as medications. And one of the huge downsides is that intensive therapy does nothing for Elliot, because he is not in a receptive place where he can (or wants to) adjust his thinking or behavior.
But for Audrey, early medical intervention has made all the difference in the world. At 6-turning-7 she was suicidal, attempting to run away on a weekly basis, refusing all school work, kicking holes in walls, and throwing extended violent tantrums. On .5mg of Risperidone (plus large doses of Focalin and Fluoxetine), she is a happy, thriving just-turned-8-year-old. She is on a gymnastics team and in girl scouts, and is doing so well across the board. Of course we will reassess her meds and dosages over time just like we do for all the kids, but I am so glad to have her on a stable, functioning foundation right now. Unlike Elliot, therapy is now hugely beneficial for Audrey - every week I see her taking coping strategies and social strategies she has learned in therapy and applying them to her life. But this is only possible for her because her brain is regulated enough to allow her to implement new skills, and because she has been stable enough over time to build friendships and communities that she values and wants to maintain.
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Ours is Marvin (The Paranoid Android)
He is constantly catastrophizing.
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My very geeky 14 year old is very much into D&D, Nerf guns, Puzzle Magazines, and puzzley games like this.
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My Spanish reading is far better than my listening or speaking. I took five years of Spanish in high school and one semester in college. In all those years the emphasis was on conjugation charts, written translations, and reading. I think this was simply the most common model for teaching classrooms full of teenagers and adults new languages at the time - minimally qualified teachers, lots of reading and worksheets, easily administered fill-in-the-blank tests, and no need to police how much English students (or teachers) were using in class.
I, obviously, wish that my spoken Spanish was much stronger, but I am glad for the ability to read Spanish. I have a very large Spanish vocabulary, and while I might miss some nuance, I can passably understand signs, instructions, newspaper articles, fiction at the level of Harry Potter, etc.
My limited ability has been a huge boon in helping my kids reach much higher proficiency. Obviously I outsource all of their conversational tutoring, and started them on that journey at a much, much younger age than I began learning. But I have been able to expose them to vast amounts of Spanish by reading books to them. Obviously we could get the same effect with audiobooks, but they are often too fast for beginners to understand, or not on topics that interest my kids. Plus, with me reading, I can keep them engaged with questions...either those within my limited spoken proficiency or ones I formulate ahead of time.
But, bottom line, learning to read a language first is not something I would advocate. I don't necessarily think it has any real advantages over learning to speak first. And at least with Spanish (I know this would be wildly different with other languages), my kids have not found learning to read it a difficult task once they were solid English readers and had several years of immersion/comprehensible input Spanish instruction under their belts.
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4 minutes ago, dsmith said:
Just for reference, my adult son who is over 250 lbs takes 2mg every other day. He could do 1 mg every day but we wanted to avoid pill splitting. He started at a lower dose, but I don't remember what it was. It may have been a liquid when he started.
On the other end of the spectrum, my 130 pound 12 year old takes 4mg of Abilify daily plus 3 mg of Risperidone.
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We bought this one from Amazon. We bought the 6" thick version because DS was sleeping in a bunk bed at the time, and we wanted to make sure the guard rail extended far enough above the mattress. We were shocked by how comfortable it was for being so thin and so cheap. And that was almost 3 years ago, and it is still holding up great.
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35 minutes ago, DawnM said:
Do you mean these?
All my kids LOVE those things.
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The biggest thing that has helped here is grouping as many chores as possible together into one lump on Sunday. The kids hate it, but they actually hate it less than having to remember and transition to chores every day. We used to try to spread their weekly chores throughout the week, and it ended up with me having to remind them and pester them all day every day.
So now, each of my kids has one, consistent daily chore that they do immediately after breakfast. I am already there supervising them cleaning up breakfast dishes and brushing teeth, so I also make sure they do their chore, which should only take 5-10 minutes. But, then, 6 days of the week they do not have to think about chores for the rest of the day.
On Sunday, after breakfast, they do their daily chores, and then immediately start in on all their weekly chores. It takes everyone about 60-90 minutes (or quite a bit longer if they want to tantrum about it), but by 9 or 9:30 they can be entirely done with their chores. I no longer have to remind them about chores because that is what everyone does after breakfast on Sunday. I still do have to supervise and get them moving again if they lose focus, but it is so much better to only have that job for one block each week instead of having to always have a part of my brain focused on who should be doing what.
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If you are hoping to outsource, Lantern English has 8 week courses teaching research papers at both middle school and high school levels.
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Tuning our upright used to be about $150.
We recently bought a used, antique baby grand, but I don't know how much that will cost to tune.
I'm going to throw in a picture of it because Spencer is over the moon! It sounds soooooo good.
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Dishes here get done once or twice a day. They get piled in the sink or next to the sink, and either DH or I load them in the dishwasher as we have time.
During seasons when life and food and dishes got overwhelming (we are in one right now), my go-to strategy is to greatly simplify meals. We can't do sandwiches here due to allergies, but we can plan meals that are fast, easy, and require limited dishes. All I am buying fresh right now is dairy and fruit, everything else is being purchased frozen (with meat pre-cooked). My goal is meals that can be on the table in 15 minutes and use no more than two pots/pans/trays and two cooking spoons/spatulas/tongs. Add in the plates and silverware we use to eat, and everything can fit into the dishwasher.
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11 minutes ago, Ting Tang said:
@wendyroo Thank you so very much for taking the time to read both of his paragraphs and for offering g your thoughts and suggestions. It seems you do not feel I should panic just yet? lol my third grader understands these assignments better, but she is different from my son. I would like for him to learn to type, but maybe the talk to text would be great, too. We will try it! I will have him do more planning/outlining. And that’s an excellent suggestion for his Texas manufacturing plant paragraph. My hope is with practice, his writing will improve. It also feels so subjective, and I don’t always recognize what is age-appropriate. Thank you again!
My kids are all reluctant writers, and they have done well with Lantern English. I just sign them up for the 8 week writing courses. I really like Lantern's concrete, matter-of-fact instruction. And I love outsourcing the feedback and grading to someone who has a better understanding of age appropriate expectations - and someone my kids will listen to less defensively than if I try to offer them feedback.
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When my oldest was born, my parents lived 3 hours away. So not insurmountable, but not a weekly visiting distance either.
Starting when my son was about 9-12 months old, my mom started having playdates with him over Skype every week or so. I would put DS in his Pack-n-Play with some toys in front of my computer so he could see my mom and she could see him. She would read him books, sing songs, play color and counting games, etc. During those times I would stay busy elsewhere so they could form their own bonds and inside jokes.
To this day my mom has Skype playdates with the kids. Just the other day Audrey called Nana up and asked if she would help her draw a dog (I am not an artist, so I am no help with that type of thing), and they spent an hour working with colored pencils and oil pastels "together". My mom has had weekly book clubs with the kids, and my dad has gone through most of the levels of Code.org with each of my kids using a mixture of Skype and remote desktop control.
At least once a month we have my parents virtually "over" for dinner so they can catch up with all the kids.
Another tradition that has helped my kids grow close to my parents are their yearly birthday visits. My parents give time instead of gifts for birthdays. Each child stays with Nana and Papa for about a week sometime around their birthday and gets to experience being an only child. They choose the meals, the TV programs, the activities, etc. They rarely do anything super special or expensive - Audrey is on her birthday visit right now, and her top requests were going to pet the cats at their next door neighbor's and drilling holes in wood with the power drill. 😄
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I think those are great paragraphs in terms of ideas, details and organization.
I think his Michigan paragraph has lots of great details - the mine, the agates, the little fish. It starts with a strong topic sentence, is organized chronologically, and uses diverse sentence structures. The grammar and punctuation are rough, but a lot of that would be easily auto-corrected if he were typing.
I think the Texas paragraph starts awkwardly because in the topic sentence he says he wants to go to Denton, but the entire paragraph is actually hyperfocused on just going to the factory. If he reworked his topic sentence to reflect that the factory is where he really wants to do, I think the paragraph would flow more easily. Other than that, I think it is a strong paragraph which is well structured and includes a lot of details. The conclusion sentence is awkward, but that is because he is trying to link it back up to Denton which is largely disconnected from the actual topic of the paragraph.
Did your son brainstorm or outline before writing these paragraphs? Have you considered letting him type or dictate or talk-to-type his writing? I know with my kids, if I force them to write by hand, they write less quantity and poorer quality...or just shut down when faced with the overwhelming task of handwriting that much.
With my fifth grader, I have him brainstorm by using talk-to-type to get phrases onto paper quickly and painlessly. He prints that, cuts the phrases apart, and groups/orders them into a rough outline. Then he types or talk-to-types his rough draft from his outline. Lastly, he edits for spelling, grammar and punctuation. Right now he can produce one longer, stronger paragraph similar to what your son wrote, or he is getting better at linking 3-5 shorter paragraphs into a connected essay.
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21 hours ago, Terabith said:
Honestly, I see this in public schools too. My 2e kid floored everyone by refusing to do AP English, because she saw the stress levels of all of her peers doing all AP classes and read the course description which included tons of group work and the fact that nobody liked the AP lit teacher. So she's taking only AP science and social studies classes, which is very confusing and weird. At public school, you are either in five AP classes every year from tenth grade on and participating in eleven different time consuming extracurricular activities and never having time to sleep or you are in regular classes and high or asleep all the time.
We just ran into this exact dichotomy. My 9th grader is going through a bit of a doesn't-want-to-do-anything phase, so I signed us up for a tour of the local (very large, highly ranked) high school.
Now, granted, DS's position is a bit unique. He would be entering half-way through 9th grade with 7 complete, official, public school and dual enrollment credits already. But three of those credits are science, one math, two social studies, and one PE/health. No English, because we were very clear with the high school principal that DS hates English, particularly writing, with a passion.
So imagine DS's dismay when the principal said that he would recommend honors English 9 plus four APs and an elective for ninth. And then in 10th grade AP Seminar along with four other AP classes.
When DS protested that he hates English, and why couldn't he just be in regular English 9 and then regular English 10, the principal explained that those classes would be far too easy for him. That those classes, "only read one book all year and spend all their writing time on emails and five paragraph essays." He also made the point that AP Seminar is important for students who will be taking a lot of AP classes (the school offers 22) because that will teach them how to write strong exam responses on all their AP tests.
On one hand, that spiel was an excellent reminder to DS of exactly how much he did not want to go to school. OTOH, I found it depressing that there was no middle ground - take full loads of APs to prepare for college or sleep through regular classes with ludicrously low expectations. DS also asked about homework load, and was told the school policy is that regular classes have little to no homework, and AP classes have about 30 minutes each per night...again two ends of the spectrum, neither of which seems great.
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DH, 14 year old, 12 year old and I got flu and the newest COVID shots 3 weeks ago. The COVID one was rough on all of us except the 12 year old (who may have already had some exposure to the newest Covid variants in public school). We were achy and very tired starting at the 12 hour mark and lasting 1-2 days. This was a smaller reaction than with my very first COVID shot, but larger than any of my others, and larger than any of my DH's (who has had very mild reactions to all of them) or DS's (who had almost no reactions to any of his in the past).
DD (turning 8 in a couple days) had her flu 3 weeks ago (no reaction) and her COVID first thing this morning. I started to see her droop this afternoon, but she chose to rally to make it through 3 hours of gymnastics this evening. On the way home, though, she was soooo much more tired than normal, but said her head hurt too much to fall asleep. Once I gave her ibuprofen and got her into bed, she was out like a light. There is nothing important on her schedule tomorrow, so she can sleep the day away if she needs to. I'm hoping she will be 100% recovered by her birthday on Sunday.
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6 hours ago, bookbard said:
my version is
30 days has September
April, June, and November.
All the rest have 31
Except for February clear
With 28, and 29 Each Leap Year.
Which rhymes if you get the rhythm right.
my version is
30 days hath September
April, June, and November.
All the rest have 31
'Cept February which has 28
And Leap Year brings another date
Which has a clear AABCC rhyming pattern
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1 hour ago, Nm. said:
Yes it sounds similar. So you have a specific time schedule though, not just a routine?
Well, we have specific time sign posts based on where we need to go each day.
My public schooler needs to be on the bus at 7:30, so that dictates when we all get up and eat breakfast.
Then, for example, two days a week I need to leave at 10:30 to take my oldest to dual enrollment. So we all have goals for what subjects will be accomplished by then. I try to have the last subject in the block be something like reading or typing that can expand or contact to fill the remaining time depending on how long the previous subjects took. Then 10:30 is the end of that block, I jump in the car with the youngest and the oldest, and leave the 10 year old home (DH works from home) to practice piano until we get home. When we get home we eat lunch and then head to back to back therapy for the 7 and 10 year olds where each gets 30 minutes of independent work time and 30 minutes of one on one time with me while their sibling is with the therapist.
So that is how our days go. I think of each different block or work location separately and plan what we hope to accomplish. Days have 0 to 3 separate work blocks, and I am always taking note of which ones run smoothly, which ones cause stress, which ones get finished too early, etc.
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5 minutes ago, Nm. said:
Wow!! Wendy that is awesome… thank you! Is this a time schedule like MOTH?
MOTH? Is that Managers of their Home?
I don't have any experience with that.
Once my kids are in upper elementary we make their schedules together...and expect to tweak them multiple times until they work well for us.
We start by marking all the sleep, meals, hygiene, chores, and scheduled activities on a weekly calendar.
Then we make a list of all the "school" activities and how long we expect them to take: Math (30 minutes) x 6 sessions, etc.
Then we start plugging "school" into the weekly schedule.
If we run out of empty time long before we run out of school stuff, then we have to majorly re-evaluate.
More commonly, we run out of empty time with just a couple school activities left, and we have to make a couple choices like dropping from 4 spelling sessions to 3, etc.The most important step is then seeing how the schedule works for the next couple weeks. Did we try to pack too much into Monday morning before piano? Are spelling sessions regularly taking longer than allotted; should we allow more time or split up the lessons into smaller bites?, etc.
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I've always approached this from the other direction and decided how much free time was healthy for each individual child.
My current 9th grader has some interesting, very worthwhile hobbies (art, Dungeons and Dragons, robotics), but he would NEVER willingly spend free time on anything more productive than texted meme wars with his friends, so I tend to limit his truly free time to 2 hours or less per day. It's not that he doesn't want to spend time on his hobbies, but he has autism, ADHD and anxiety, and mustering the executive function to choose and implement a hobby is much harder for him than just sitting down and letting his phone mindlessly entertain him.
So for him I mentally categorize some activities as "recreational", meaning they are structured and organized rather than free-choice, but they are activities that he enjoys once I prop him into it.
Therefore, to create a schedule for him, I start with an empty week and then mark out sleep, meals, hygiene, chores, free time and recreational activities that I am insisting on. Then I fill the rest with "school", making sure to leave plenty of margin for filling his water bottle or checking the mail box about every 30 minutes. 😏 That means he ends up with quite a bit of "school" time, but it is certainly not endless desks and textbooks. That "school" is a mix of really horrible things (writing) and fairly enjoyable things (Great Courses Lectures) that add up to a well rounded education.
Also of note, our lives and schedules don't lend themselves at all to a neat breakdown of daily subjects. My kids spend one whole day in a Spanish immersion program, so they accomplish very little other school that day. They also spend one full day at a pubic school shared-time program taking in-person electives, so again, very little other school gets done. Add in music lessons, gymnastics, dual enrollment, therapy appointments for everyone and three kids' worth of extracurriculars, and every day looks different - I aim for their lives to be well rounded at the week and month levels, not at the day level. I am thankful my state has almost no regulation, and that I don't have to make meaningless distinctions about what "counts".
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I don't understand; what did you want them to write?
If you got 21 messages, then obviously you can't sell to all of them. Did you want all 21 of them to instead write, "I'd like to buy them."?
So you just wanted them to assume the tires were still available because the ad hadn't been deleted...even if the buyers had lots of past experience telling them there would be a feeding frenzy and in all likelihood you would get a bunch of messages before you had a chance to delete the ad? Which is in fact what happened? And therefore, for the vast majority of the respondents, the tires were in fact not still available?
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26 minutes ago, Ting Tang said:
My next in line was recommended to go through two phases
OTOH, our orthodontics office is not big on splitting work into two phases unless teeth are clearly causing a current problem. Even with my daughter whose bottom teeth are biting into and scarring her palate, they still said it was entirely up to us if we wanted to do the expander now or wait and do everything together when she is older. We decided to go with the two phase because she is in pain and having severe speech delays, but they said from an orthodontic perspective, we could have waited a few years, done all the work in one phase, and gotten the same final results as the two phase process.
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My youngest (7) has an expander right now. Our ortho said we could wait and do an expander and braces when DD is older, but her underbite is so severe that she was biting into the roof of her mouth causing pain and scarring. Plus, we think it is really impacting her speech, and making it hard for her to communicate.
She has had the expander for six weeks, and we expect her to keep it for 10 months. (Then a retainer at night for a couple years, then braces when she is ten or eleven.) It is annoying on many levels, but we have settled into a routine. And after a first bout of cranking it every night, now we don’t have to do that for the time being.
I remind DD about my aunt who had a mouth shape just like DD’s. My aunt grew up before expanders, so they waited until she was 19 and then broke her jaw to realign it. That was incredibly painful, and she had to have her mouth wired shut for a prolonged period. An expander is definitely the way to go - despite all its inconvenience.
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Would you serve 4-day old rice
in The Chat Board
Posted
Sure.
At that point I would probably throw it into chicken soup with rice to rehydrate it and pep it up.