Hi- I am new to afterschooling and this forum and running into a roadblock because my middle schooler is just.not.interested.
After homeschooling my son in the classical tradition through 6th grade, we put him in a well-regarded private school last year, thinking it would be good for him to make the transition to brick-and-mortar school during middle school rather than high school (ie before grades really start to matter). He loved it, primarily for the social aspect, and did very well academically- all A's- but was really not challenged by the material. I don't think he learned a single new thing academically, really. He certainly learned a lot about test taking and realized how the 'silly' mistakes he often made and could get away with in homeschool (sign errors in math, not reading directions fully) cost him in regular school. By all accounts from his teachers, he is responsible and on task at school, with good behavior both in and out of the classroom- kind, respectful, yadayadayada.
Because he studied Latin and piano for 3 years while we were hs, DH and I were not willing to just drop those things, particularly since the school does not do a good job of providing either music or foreign language education. We kept doing them last year (afterschooling, I guess, though we didn't know the term) and are planning on doing so again this year (8th grade). When he starts high school next year, he will be able to take Latin at school.
Here's the problem: he fights, tooth and nail, about doing these things. He knows most of his schoolfriends don't have anything to do in the evenings except sports and homework- in addition, they are allowed to play video games and watch tv (things we restrict to the weekends); he has "all this extra work" as he puts it and begs every night for us to let him quit piano and Latin. The piano is 1/2 hr per night, and Latin, if he's in a good mood, takes him about the same. We're flexible- if he has a lot of homework one night, he can skip the latin and make it up the next night or over the weekend. He complains so much, though, that the whole exercise takes sometimes an hour and a half or two hours a night. He is not at ALL that on-task boy his teachers see at school! We don't have that much time in the evenings as it is, and his attitude is really starting to spoil our evenings and the mood of the rest of our family (we have five younger ones who are still homeschooled).
I guess this is more of a discipline issue than an afterschooling one, but has anyone run into this? Really wanting to afterschool your kids but running into a great deal of resistance from the kid himself? Is it worth it? If I allow him to quit Latin and/or piano, am I just giving in and allowing his whininess to win?
thank you for any advice/anecdotes you can offer.