Ahhhh.... thank you for putting this so eloquently... in a way that I lacked the writing skills (or the brain power) to do!! Your swimming class analogy is brilliant!

I'm far from being an expert as well - and I struggle with mentoring a son so very unlike me in so many ways! LOL!! There are indeed many ways to get the job done and I need to think outside the box a bit more, hence this thread and wanting to peek in on other methods and tips... but one thing that is non negotiable (at least to my husband and I) is wanting to develop a culture of discussion on how to improve and bouncing ideas off one another. My son sounds somewhat like your youngest. He is very bright in many ways but just wants to do his own thing. He will rush through things to be able to draw and do his own projects.... which isn't a bad thing per se - but I'd love if he could realize the benefit of putting his full attention to what is asked of him and THEN playing afterwards! :D

Wholeheartedly agree!

Oh and one last thing - I do thank the people who PM'd me their support and ideas. I now GET why you hesitated to do so within the thread! :lol: Edited to add: To all you true afterschoolers - even though this thread was bashed by a few not willing (or even ABLE) to look at it from an afterschooling parents point of view and thus was not as constructive as it truly could have been, I hope that you don't automatically give up on your parental rights to work with your childrens school. Don't let teachers or other parents paint a picture of you that is simply not accurate. Being an involved parent does not mean that you are a control freak and that you have trust issues. Questioning teachers and disagreeing with them does not mean that you are obnoxious or a pain in the butt. Don't buy into that lie! And one last thing - I may have a low post count - but I have been a member of this group for a number of years now. (many of the posters with low numbers have great wisdom and show great restraint and many of the best advice I've received is from you guys - you are true experts <3 ) - and I have noticed a number people who don't know how to disagree in a respectful manner. As well - even if you disagree - try reminding yourself as to what the OP is ASKING. Chances are you don't need to educate him/her on YOUR PoV.. . chances are the discussion would be a lot more fruitful - if you simply said something along the lines of "I respectfully disagree with what you are asking and here is why.... but in line with what you are asking and to help you brainstorm - have you tried this, or what about this?" Don't jump to negative conclusions based on what was said - I have had to go back in this thread multiple times to correct negative and false conclusions - giving this thread a more sour and less constructive flavor. Assign positive intent - if you must jump to conclusions or read in between the lines (who wants to write a book when you are asking for help??!!) then jump to the highest and best possible conclusion!! Or ask respectfully with an attitude of genuinely wanting to help. Oops - one more thing! Even the negative posters helped me to realize that I need to reassess our intention on WIP's... and even though I resent the WAY you went about it - I do thank you for giving me things to think about. That is all. Peace to you all.

At no time did the teacher or principal even insinuate that my son needed an IEP - they said that they only ACCOMODATE those that do. Our decision to get him evaluated was made well before grade 5 due to the 18-24 month waiting period here and had nothing to do with this issue. And I said that my son is normal (or on-track) in some areas and advanced in others. As is the case for almost every child! You and a very small handful of others (and by no means do you represent the majority involved in my conversation here - only the most polarized in your stance and the most unwilling to assign positive intent) have repeatedly tried your best to turn a very reasonable and normal request to see my child's schoolwork into something very different. You can run along now to create your next drama-filled argument. To the others - again - thank you for the support and advice! Wish me luck! :)

Oh for the love of PETE! You are basing your opinions on a very inaccurate list of assumptions (and I might add, purposely trying to assign very negative intent) If you want to continue to assign intent here is a MUCH more accurate list of what we have been doing (AGAIN) for you to work from: 1) Asked to see child's work (both uncompleted and completed) 2) Discussed with family as to whether it is important for us to be able to have access to his work 3) We decide as a family that by golly yes - it would be MOST helpful for us to see his work and for him to have access to his own work for many, many logical reasons as outline in previous posts. 4) Met with teacher and discussed with principal afterwards (and there was not an obnoxious word to be heard, I might add) 5) Discussed with husband, then with family as a unit. Frank discussion by all. Respect for the teacher and school was emphasized even while we disagreed on this SINGLE issue. Discussed intent going forward. 6) Wrote letter to teacher and cc'd principal as a recap of issue (and to have documentation as to why we are requesting to see work). 7) No answer. 8) Opted to coach son through an ongoing project (teacher was aware as was principal) to hold him to a higher standard to which he was capable - but he STILL had plenty left to do in-class. 9) Teacher complained that son had nothing to do during set aside time to work on projects. To which I find out that son wanted to draw instead of continuing on with his projects. 10 ) we had talk with son about how he needs to use in-class time to do what the teacher wants him to do - even if it is just tweaking or reviewing project and not to draw. Cleared up any confusion and reinforced respect for teacher 11) Wrote back to teacher apologizing for the in-class drawing and assured her that even though son worked on it at home, he was was not done project (and should have continued working on it as she intended. ) 12) Teacher had 2 more in-class project sessions for said project in which son continued to work on project in class 13) Son received A+ on project. 14) Still not seeing any completed work 15) Come to online forum to seek additional suggestions before escalating issue. Steps not yet completed: 16) Due to feedback here about "in progress" work - will be contemplating this issue and discussing with husband (and possibly with son afterwards) 17) Due to not seeing ANY completed work (except for 2 math tests) - will be asking teacher to have completed and graded work ready to view during parent/teacher interview. And have decided ahead of time not to feel rushed in doing so. (thank you for that idea - you know who you are :) ) Nowhere do I continue to criticize the teacher. Nor do I constantly tell my son that his teacher is wrong. Nor do I have plans to be obnoxious during parent/teacher interview. Just plan on defending parental right to be a partner in my son's education - which would be satisfied simply by being able to see completed work! Sheeeesh..... hope that about covers it!! Once again - thank you everyone for your suggestions! I had planned on updating everyone as to the parent teacher interview outcome. But will have to rethink that due to the continued negativity shown here. To those who are genuinely interested, please DO feel free to message me (as many of you already have).

I live in Canada. We don't have a nationwide common core curriculum.

Ah well, this has been a consistent theme here - that's for sure - that wanting to see your child's work is deemed being a control freak/buttinsky/insert your own phrase :D

I suspect it is in middle school here...

Yes, I will be asking this AGAIN at the next parent/teacher interview coming up in another week or so. Mainly she isn't because all of the work stays in duotangs until the end of the year - she likely doesn't want to have go through the hassle of taking everything out of the duotang that already HAS been marked and hand it out to each student (and then putting the newer stuff back in - you know how duotangs work)- and likely doesn't trust the students to take it only the marked items out themselves.. I can think of no other reason why.

Spelling isn't taught at our school. And perhaps there are some advanced students that are taking notes for themselves, but notetaking isn't taught whatsoever. At least it wasn't in grade 4 or 5. And there is definitely NO copying of notes that can be taken homeNow wouldn't that make sense??? I likely would not be having this issue if I could even see notes he's copied. These are part of the skillsets I'd like to work with him on. He does have an agenda - but it is used only as a tool for parents and teachers to communicate to each other in.

Ah - having a free choice time sounds lovely. My son does not get that. And so far he tells me that when he completes his work he sometimes has enough time to review it -but doesn't get free time. Okay - I think I mentioned this before - but I'm not just talking about uncompleted work (although I'd like to see that as well). I'm talking about completed and graded work as well - we.do.not.see.any.of.it until the end of the school year!!!

Sorry - just so I understand you correctly - you don't think it makes sense to be able to see what your child is working on? And I am not understanding your second paragraph at all. I am not seeing any work come home (except for the 2 tests I mentioned in a previous post), I do not want access to her brain, or her standards or her lesson plans - just want to see what my son has been working on, so that I can then fill in the cracks, etc.

We don't have study hall at school until high school (in our school district). But that would make perfect sense to get them started doing that when they are younger. How did you determine which study skills to teach at home?

Ah - that would be lovely but we don't have a say in having our child placed in more challenging classes unless he/she has been tested as being gifted!!