Perogi
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Posts posted by Perogi
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Another grateful user!!
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Following. I plan to use it next year.
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This JUST happened to us two months ago. However, the owner of the car was NOT cool about it. At all. She was livid. I guess the car is brand new and dd (who has never yakked in a car before) did not really know how to do it gracefully so it got all over her own clothing and the seat. Because the owner was so upset, I felt obligated to purchase a $100 interior detail gift card. Despite this the owner never fails to remind me or my dd about the incident every time we run into her. As of yesterday (the last time we saw her), her car STILL smells. Thanks for the update.
Poor dd was mortified enough without the anger and comments. She is now so nervous, she will not ride in anyone else's car which is tricky because this was for a team sport that requires a lot of travel. We typically take turns driving. I guess not us anymore.....
So, given that your people are being very nice, I would not only give a small thank you gift but also profusely thank them for not making your child feel like mine does.
I'm so sorry that this was your experience :(
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Ah. I guess I think someone not getting angry over a dirty car, demanding reparations, or being rude or hurtful to an already horribly embarrassed and sensitive teen is a Big Deal, so responding with profuse thanks and a treat or card would be in scale with that.
I absolutely agree that sincerest thanks and a token of my appreciation for their gracious understanding is appropriate. I do think there's a danger of overdoing it though. I also would not have held the least bit of grudge had they asked for me to pay to have their car cleaned. I would not, however, expect anyone to be rude or hurtful to a child who had an accident!
I am genuinely grateful for their kind and friendly way of handling it ("Don't worry, we've all had our moments, kids puke"). I was further impressed today when their daughter called to inquire after dd and see how she was feeling today.
I will absolutely be acknowledging the incident with a card and gift at the next practice.
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I love Danny, Matilda, and BFG.
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Interesting! That's definitely not a rule here! In case it was ambiguous, the coach's daughter was also present.
I like the car wash idea too!
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I am wary of overcompensating and my hesitation with a gift card was then deciding the value of the gift card! We are from a small, friendly town and I do think they understand and aren't harboring a grudge. Nevertheless, I would like to acknowledge the time it cost them - and the ick factor!
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Since it was the dad dealing with it my husband thought a 6 pack of beer might be nice ;-)
Well, he thought I should let it go but when I wasn't letting it go he suggested a dude type gift.
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This evening I called dd's baseball coach and took him up on his offer to drive dd to practice because dh was sick today and I needed to stay home and care for our other kids.
On the way home, dd says "without warning", she threw up in his truck!! She burst into tears because she was so embarrassed. I asked dd about the truck and she said she caught it all in her lap and the coach stopped so she could shakeit off.
I put dd in the bath and called the coach's house. I spoke to his wife and she commented about puke being on her husband's coat and pants and said he and their daughter were outside scrubbing the truck. She was laughing and gracious and understanding. I offered to pay for their truck to be cleaned but she declined, claiming their steam cleaner would do the trick.
I still feel awful! Yes, it was an unfortunate accident that I couldn't have seen coming, but I think I want to do something to apologize. I'm mortified.
Thoughts??
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Ok! I'm back! So sorry for starting a thread and then disappearing. It was one of those days yesterday (thus prompting me to start the thread in the first place!)
Honestly, right now, I'm at the blow up place some of you mentioned. I have no patience left for it. It's so defeating to devote myself to this job and carefully and diligently plan just to have them grumble and complain about having to do it. Yes, my expectations are reasonable, and yes, they have lots of free time. Sometimes I'd like to throw them into school just so they can see what it's like to be "busy" all day long and then have homework on top of that.
I've tried something like 3 strikes you're out or beads in a jar. We had linking cubes. Each child got 2 cubes and if they misbehaved in school they would lose a cube. Theoretically if they kept both cubes they got a check mark, if they lost one cube they didn't get the check mark, and if they lost both cubes they had a consequence. 5 check marks earned them a reward. Trouble is, I hated keeping track of it. I am not a rewards person in general. Also, taking a cube when a child was already having a hard time tended to escalate things (for one child in particular). And when someone got a reward and someone else was still days away from the possibility of a reward it put that person in a bad mood (same child ;) )
Chores and writing lines are consequences we use. Maybe for a bit I need to crack down and issue the consequences more frequently; give less leeway for grumbling. I think we're in the habit now of them grumbling, me getting annoyed, everyone being crabby, me threatening, them feeling like they have the worst life ever. It's hard to get out from under that and have a good day.
Sending them to their room may work, but only if I send them with work to be completed, otherwise it seems counterproductive. I don't want school to drag on all day because they keep getting 10 minute breaks in their rooms.
I love the idea of the redo - responding again appropriately. I did this a LOT when they were littler and do it a bit now but not as much as I should.
I also like the idea of doing extra work if the original lesson is done with a bad attitude. I threaten it but have never followed through. I also like "all complaints must be submitted in writing" and "we'll talk about it when you're done". I've done something similar with other behaviours. Obey first and then we can talk.
Theoretically not engaging, not having any reaction is my goal......but sometimes I lose it.
Thanks for helping me to pause, consider all angles, think it through, and get out of the rut of just being completely irritated and unable to see the forest for the trees.
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What does that look like?
My kids are 7, 9, and 11, and I'm getting worn out by their attitude whenever I ask them to do something they don't particularly enjoy. If I say it's time for history/math/handwriting/whatever it is they don't want to do I get the sigh, the grimace, the "why do I have to..." All in all it's not hugely terrible but it's irritating and draining to have little bits of resistance from someone all.day.long.
In theory I don't tolerate whining or complaining and I am always responding and correcting when their attitude is unacceptable but I need something more because nothing is changing.
So, if you would say that you don't tolerate that kind of attitude from your children, what is your response when they behave that way? I get that things aren't always fun and that they may not want to do something but I also know that if, for example, their piano teacher asks them to do something they do it without complaining. I want the same respect. Whether or not they whine the task still gets completed but I can't handle the constant drain on my emotional energy when they are grumbling.
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The Learning House is good. Going to a homeschool conference allows you to shop without shipping fees. I know of one in Hamilton and one in Kitchener. I also order from Amazon or buy ebooks.
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:grouphug:
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That's the point at which I added Grammar for Middle School with my older dd. She just did one exercise a day, in writing, on her own, and not on days where she had a huge writing project in another area - so not every day for sure. It takes a long time to work through the book at that pace, but who cares? It's awesome "copywork for big kids" and the tools definitely started showing up in her other writing.
I could maybe manage that when Creative Writer switches to poetry - then she won't be doing so much writing.
Grammar for Middle School as opposed to Sentence Composing or Paragraph Writing?
Why did they make their materials so confusing?!
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We have one assigned silent reading book and two read alouds. The kids then also have their own free reading happening on the side.
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I used Sentence Composing for Elementary and loved it but haven't done any others because I just simply don't know where to go next!
And we're using WWS 1 and Creative Writer 2 so she is already doing a lot of writing. But I really, really liked what Kilgallon taught her last year.
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One other suggestion would be to get the book Modern History Through Canadian Eyes. The author pulls together from many sources to create a chronological history of Canada, and one of the sources she uses is SOTW 3 and 4. So you would be able to see where Canadian events fit into the SOTW timeline. I use it as a base for my Canadian history stuff.
This is also the resource I use for Canadian history. I have my kids do Canadian history in grades 4 and 5 and we do SOTW alongside as schedule in Modern History Through Canadian Eyes. It's an excellent resource, imo.
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My 7yo is about to drive me out of my tree with his constant activity!!
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I'm actually very pleased with how most of our work is going. The things I want to address, find a solution for, etc.:
-when to fit morning time (or whatever we call it) -- I don't like to do it right after breakfast, because everything goes better if we jump right into independent work and one-on-one work. But then if things take too long, we don't want to do it after lunch either. More commitment to that on my part needs to happen.
-getting moving earlier -- we are naturally leisurely in the morning, and it isn't conducive to productive days. DH leaves for work at 6 am, so it's not like the whole family can just shift to get up later. We need to be sitting down by 8 am to start our work, and I think everyone would be more productive.
-not getting the extras done on our day out -- see above. Getting moving earlier would make that much easier.
Same for us! I always intend to do it mid-morning but then the kids are on a roll and don't particularly want to stop so they complain and rage against morning meeting. I am NOT a morning person so there's no way it's happening first thing (which, ahem, should probably be a lot earlier than it is). I think for us we will do it after lunch - hopefully by then their seat work is done so we can relax and not feel pressured to get to anything else, other than quiet time.
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That's a great idea! We haven't covered note taking yet, but maybe in 7th or 8th. It would definitely ensure she's not daydreaming during the newscast. Actually, that's not like her. But her sister..... :p
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Thanks for the sympathy and comiseration everyone. I know it could be much, much worse and I'll get over it. But tonight, it sucks.
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Honestly, I would rather have smashed a window or something that would cost a bunch but would get fixed. This will not get fixed and I'll have to look at it day after day, after day, after day.....
I get that all of us do stupid things (dh has run into the closed garage door, put a pipe through the window) but it feels really crappy when it happens. I'm still shaking my head....I don't know how I didn't see it coming. I'm exhausted and was just on auto pilot I guess.
Dh is being awesome. Amazing. I remember bumper tapping someone in front of me at a red light in high school and when I got home my dad gave me a huge earful about what an idiotic thing it was to do.
Dh went out to take a look and said most of it is on my plastic bumper so where the paint scratched off it shouldn't rust. His door is dented and has a white scrape but it's "superficial" - not all the way through the paint job.
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Ho ho ho, Merry Christmas :(
I was just talking to the kids and not paying attention backing out of our double driveway and side swiped his van. His van has a dent and scrape on the passenger side door and mine is scraped above the wheel well. His van is 12 years old but mine is only just over a year.
I know it's just a car but it was just a stupid, completely avoidable incident.
I want to just quit!
in The Chat Board
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If you find it, please let me know! I'll join you.