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GardenTenders/Kim

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Posts posted by GardenTenders/Kim

  1. go to your evite account and I am pretty sure if you were invited it will post up as "up coming events" but I could be wrong.

     

    Um, is it general practice to invite homeschool group kids even if they aren't your child's age? Wondering...... my daughter has a birthday coming up and I hate to invite people and have them expect to have to buy a gift for our daughter........ I was just inviting friends and HS friends that we have been to their parties and are returning the favor. BTW, we have taught our daughter that gifts are not expected, ever.

  2. I come from a conservative Christian background. My parents gave the "inheritance" so to speak to one of my brothers before my father died. It was with the understanding (verbally) that my brother would be taking care of my parents as they got older, ie, they would be with him because the house would be put in his name etc. Then my father died.

     

    Long story short, my brother met a chick on eharmony, moved out of state, taking much of the money from the sale of said property which wasn't much, it was a large double wide style mobile home that was the family home, and now has very little to do with my mother, he only calls when sil is out. Mom moved to WA shortly after I married and has been living near me since. If we had a bigger home we would have her here with us.

     

    My brother is upset my mom and my dd are very close and nearly inseparable. Yet he knows my mother is on a small fixed income and unable to travel. He claims to make more than my DH and I when I was working, yet has NEVER offered to pay for her way down there to visit (his wife refuses to leave her family). He offerers to buy my mom something she needs, and he NEVER comes through, yet I hear all the time how "CHRISTIAN THEY ARE, with a home in order" etc etc.... makes me ill. :glare: My mom has tried to pay to visit them herself every year, but her health is getting worse and frankly she doesn't want to be around chaos, and she has no savings left to buy tickets etc. They have only visited here twice and both times for less than 24 hrs, sil couldn't be gone from home any longer than that I guess, one time they had to get home because a mom was about 5 mins late picking up her child that she was watching and she put her fist threw a plate glass window. :001_huh:

     

    I am not sure if this lack of follow through is 100% from my brother, I think the *&*^% has a large say in what he can and can't do for my mother. Heck, he is so controlled by her it's not even funny.

     

    Anyway, I am upset he took so much and promised so much and I am here to pick up the pieces and be the "caretaker". It does hurt that he did this to our mom and our fathers memory.

     

    Both my brothers are wrecks. My mom has done so much for both money wise, but as I get older I see I am the one she relies on to help her and she not only considers me her daughter but her friend.

     

    I know that may not help you see that everyone has some sort of dysfunction in their family, but I hope it maybe helps in a small way.

     

    I would confront your parents. I wish I would have confronted instead playing peacemaker when our pastor and elder sat down with me, dh and brother to hash out this stuff and instead of bringing up all the past I just sat like a bump on the log not wanting a confrontation. Sometimes I have to really struggle to not let the anger at brother and sil make me ill..... you must do what will be healthiest for you and your loved ones, your family. you may find out that they consider you the dependable one, the one they honestly look to as the child that has made it to being a grown up...... anyway...... :grouphug:

     

    So sorry for my disjointed rambles.

  3. We have the opposite issue. We got into the habit of having the kids put on their clothes for the next day right after their baths if we had to be up and out of the house early -- we would pop them into the car half asleep, then feed them breakfast when we got to our destination. They realized at some point that it saves them a few minutes in the morning if they always put on their "tomorrow clothes" after their baths, and now do it almost all the time.

     

    LOL:lol:

  4. Some Christians believe bad things happen in the world and God can make good things happen from them, but that doesn't mean he *wanted* your precious baby, Lydia, to be taken from you.

     

    Instead of thinking of it as God *causing* bad things to happen, think of God's will as allowing bad things to happen. Because actions in and of the world have consequences.

    :grouphug:

     

    This is what I have had to decide. When my father was tragically killed everyone said it was God's time, etc. I was very close to my dad and I had to come to grips with the fact that they were not being mean spirited but unknowing and didn't understand that "Allowing" and "will" are not the same, if that makes sense. Why would God WILL a man to die leaving behind a loving family when so many mean and corrupt people live to be very old. Why would a child molester get to live where my father had to die? I struggled so hard with these questions and the answers I got were little comfort.

     

    Allowing is not the same as Will. Sometimes things happen and in our finite minds we can't understand why. We will never know, in this lifetime. I can't ever believe in my heart that God wills a baby to die, or a good and Godly man to be killed by another, what I do believe is that He allows it to happen, for whatever purpose He allows it to happen and then He makes something good come out the ashes. Maybe the good wont be seen for years down the road. Maybe your talking about it will do some good for another going through a similar situation. Maybe we will never see the good, but I know that God is just.

     

    :grouphug:

  5. I had my daughter at 37. I'm where I am suppose to be. I don't think I would have been a good mother at 23 or whatever is considered "normal".

     

    Seriously, one can agree or disagree, but most women I know don't really know themselves as a person until they are around 30. That's not to say that in your 20's you aren't a wonderful, energetic parent, but over 30 I think you have some wisdom that all the books in the world will never give a 20 something.

     

    There are trade offs with each. Many of us have no choice in the matter, we were given our children when God decided we were at the right point in our lives to be a parent. We make the best of whatever cup we have placed before us. :)

  6. I have NO IDEA what YE, OE or anything in between is. Anyone care to enlighten?

     

    We are in two homeschool groups and one has actually said no to religion at all and my DD wanted to sign Jesus Loves me and was told we didn't sing it in homeschool circle time. But they are nice people, I just know our spiritualities are not matched. The other one that I know of has no issues, but the group is still under a year old.

  7. I have a strong willed "adventure" girl. She will be 4 in August but has always been strong willed. Not in a mean way, but she just thinks she can do things herself.

     

    Her room is a constant struggle. Seriously. I set the timmer giving her so many minutes to pick up her toys, I sing the dreaded clean up song, I do time outs, I take away toys, special TV time (we love clifford) and still have a problem getting her to pick up after herself. Someone said, make her. :willy_nilly: Ok, so how exactly do I make her? Do I spank her if time outs and loss of loveys and toys don't work? And what if spanking dosen't work? Do I spank harder? I have asked these questions and I get blank stares. It's not an option.

     

    So, I know how you feel. But I also look at my little girl and I know I would never change her love of life and trying new things. But I would like it if she listened to me better.... UGH!

     

    :grouphug:

  8. I grew up in a "loud" home and my mother was abused growing up, sexually, physically and emotionally. I am sure some of that rubbed off on how she raised my brothers and I, but she did the best she could with what she had and my father was a good counter balance to her messed up childhood. He was relaxed, where she could be "highstrung". Did things happen because she never was taught how to be a mom and was herself the mother of her siblings becuase her parents spent more time in the bar than at home. Yes. But I do not hold what happened or didn't happen against her. She is no longer high strung and I love her. Did the spanking go beyond what they should have at times, yes. But past is past and she did the best she could.

     

    Abuse that really hurt that I remember though came from other children in school because I was "different" I guess. I dealt with being bullied for more than 6 years. I would say it started in about the third grade until I was about 14-15. Between everything it has impacted me and I fight the feelings of being inadequate to this day. Emotional abuse from a brother really hurt too. He would never classify it as abuse and would deny it to this day, however, he got his.... he married a woman that abuses and controls him completely. He can't pee without her saying yes he can. He is to proud to say he made a mistake so all his controling of my family for years is kind of laughable now when I see what he fell into because of e-harmony.

     

    That being said, I can't read this thread. It hurts.

  9. Thank you!

     

    I have been looking a bit, though my daughter is only 4, at methods. Thus far, and I still need to buy the book "The Early Years", the idea of allowing our children to be children while young, sounds like what has been my idea all along. Teaching numbers and letters when the interest is there. I feel like we have been learning since birth. :001_smile:

     

    I have actually also been looking at doing my own curriculum when we start. Something I am farily certain we can do while young. Just looking at ideas or methods I guess.

  10. Hi.

     

    Just researching and was introduced briefly to Charlotte Mason and am searching for more information on it.

     

    A little about us. We (meaning my self, DH and our 4 yr old daughter Sarah--I will call her Sarah, S or Bear--Since birth her nickname has been Bear), have a very strong desire to homeschool and have since our daughter was born. The past year we have been looking at what we want to do. Thus far we have taken a "organic" appoarch which really seems to be like CM in many ways. By organic I don't mean unschool, but something more natural but still "school".

     

    I have been stressing over the need society has placed on me that my almost 4 yr old know her numbers, her alphabet, sight words and more and she is still in diapers! Learning about CM (what I know thus far) is a answered prayer!

     

    So, I have open ears and would love to hear and learn more.

     

    Thank you!

    Kim & Family

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