[I think I'm ready to "homeschool" our investments. Any curriculum recommendations?]

As a former broker, I highly recommend sticking with someone who knows what they are doing. It IS possible to learn everything you need to know--if you have the time and inclination to learn, not only approaches to investing (technical or fundamental), but also have the time to follow your investments. Do you want income investments or growth investments, what are your long-term goals? What is your risk tolerance? Which investments match that tolerance? What kind of tax implications are you willing to take now...or would you rather have them later? There is a lot to learn, especially in an uncertain environment.

 

That said, there are a lot of snaky people in the business! Not everyone's ethics are the same. I recommend going with a nationwide brokerage firm that has a strong and long history. The firm I worked for had strict oversight of their brokers to make certain everything was done in the clients best interest.

 

I'm certain you can learn everything you need to know! Truly, it's not rocket science. BUT, make sure that this is a time investment you are willing to make.

 

Thanks, Georgiana. This is a good perspective. Our financial planner is only licensed to sell insurance products and mutual funds. He isn't a licensed stock broker, so he's quite limited in what he recommends to us. I'd like to switch to a money manager (my dad has a good one). The only problem is, our financial planner is also a client of dh's business, so if we switch, it could cause some problems for dh. If we do it ourselves, we're less likely to incur negative feelings. We've seen how defensively and negatively our financial planner has reacted to other clients switching their accounts. Dh is an electrical contractor, and is nearing the end of an enormous "renovation" (tripled the size of his house, and put in a totally computerized "smart house" system) for our financial planner. He's been working on this project for close to 3 years, and they still haven't completed the pool house. Even if we were to switch after the project is finished, dh is concerned that there will be bad feelings that will lead to negative comments that would reflect poorly on dh's business. Dh has literally bent over backward to accommodate this constantly changing project (every time our pfp sees a new product on the market, he wants dh to incorporate it into his house - I think the guy can actually turn his lights on and off remotely with his cell phone if he wants).

 

Sorry, I know that's too much information. I guess I'm just trying to figure out what we can do. I feel a bit trapped.:tongue_smilie:

 

Lori

[I think I'm ready to "homeschool" our investments. Any curriculum recommendations?]

I hope this isn't too off topic.:) This board is such a great resource that I thought I'd see if I can get some help in this area, too.

 

We've been investing in mutual funds through a financial planner for years, and we're just. not. happy. We're seeing our potential earnings get eaten up by management fees, and the only person who seems to be making money is our financial planner. My dh has been encouraging me to take over our portfolio for years now, but every time I try, I can't figure out where to begin. There's just way too much information out there. I need to hear from a real person who has been managing their own money with some level of growth and the ability to sleep at night. Is there a good book that can narrow down the options, and point me in the right direction? I have an aptitude, but not a huge interest in the subject. I do all our personal finances, and the bookkeeping for our business. I generally understand the stock market, and ETFs, and MERs and all the lingo, but I'm not inclined to check the markets every day to see where things are at. I just need someone to help narrow things down for me. I need a "curriculum" with a system. I don't want to do three years of research. I want to have a bit of a plan to follow so that I can just get started and learn more as I go.

 

I've noticed that at least one of the dads on the board has mentioned managing his own investments (was it regguheert?). I'm hoping there is somone who can point me in the right direction by recommending an excellent book or website. I'm in Canada, but things are pretty much the same, with the exception of tax laws and available online trading accounts.

 

Thanks,

Lori

[Static-y Girl's Hair]

Sometimes running an anti-static fabric softener dryer sheet over fabric can help with static in clothes. Maybe it would also work on hair.

 

Lori

[Do you feel like you compromise your values too much?]

I prefer principles to standards. Standards don't require any analysis, or even any thought to a given circumstance. You just make (or accept) a rule, and enforce it on yourself and those around you. Principles require a person to evaluate and re-evaluate situations constantly, to figure out what is right, what is good, what is true and noble, and what is wrong, harmful, fraudulent and crass. Standards are easy, but don't get at the heart of any matter. Operating by principles takes much more energy, but is much more relevant.

 

 

:iagree: I love this distinction. Of course, parenting is way more work when you focus on principles and constant evaluation, but I think (hope) it's worth it in the end!

 

Lori

[Reduced ability to cope as the years pass?]

Although I'm not prone to worry and panic, I can relate to the "reduced ability to cope" as I age. I don't have any advice, but I have lots of sympathy. :grouphug:

 

Lori

[I'm a little alarmed about a call my daughter received today.]

Does her cell phone voice mail happen to say, "you have reached first name, last name" by any chance? If so, he could have looked her up that way - by last name and just asking for her when someone answered.

 

 

 

Yes, her cell phone voice mail had a message with her first name and her home phone number. I've told her to change the message so that our home number isn't given. The real mystery is how he ended up with her cell number, since she definitely didn't text him.

 

I've already called the police, and they've followed up. There doesn't seem to be much that they can do. They told me that if he calls again, I can hit *57 to have the phone company perform a trace, but because it's a cell number, the police don't seem to have any better access than I do (or they're not trying very hard).

 

Lori

[I'm a little alarmed about a call my daughter received today.]

I called the police. They were very pleasant. They started a file, and will do a trace on the number. They told me to call them again if this person tries to contact dd on either number.

 

I don't think I'll change our phone number, since any personal information that could be gained by a creepy guy would already have been accessed. I'll just be very careful, and drive dd to and from school.

 

Thanks for all the help. Sometimes when our gut tells us something is wrong, we just need someone to nudge us toward action.

 

Lori

[I'm a little alarmed about a call my daughter received today.]

I answered our home phone today. I noticed that it was an unfamiliar area code, and a man's voice asked for my 16 year old dd. I handed her the phone, but whispered that I didn't know who it was, and that she should be careful. When she got off the phone, she said that he told her she had sent him a text to pick her up from the bus stop. He apparently called her cell phone, and our home phone number was on her voice mail as an alternate contact. He told her that he was supposed to pick someone up from the bus, and thought that's what the text was about. Dd's understanding of the conversation was that he had somehow received a text from her by mistake. Dd has checked her outgoing texts, and there's no record of a text being sent to his number.

 

This doesn't sit right with me on so many levels. Dd goes to the public high school half time to take math, science, and a couple of electives. She takes the school bus, and has a bit of a walk from where the bus picks her up and drops her off. Now this person has our home phone number, which means he can do a reverse look-up and find our home address. With a home address, there's a local school bus website that allows anybody to look up the bus schedule for drop off and pick up points.

 

I did a reverse look-up of the phone number, and it comes up as unlisted. The area code shows as a new one for the Vancouver (BC) area, which is 3 hours from here, but it also seems to be an alternate area code for our area.

 

I'm not sure how to handle this. Am I over thinking this? I'm not one to worry about these sorts of things, but I can't imagine how this person could have received a text from my dd, and if he had, why not just text her back? I suppose he could have dialed the wrong number when he called her cell phone, but I thought that if someone received a text, that number would be in the phone's memory, and they could just automatically dial it.

 

Should I do something? If so, what? :confused:

 

Lori

 

ETA: I took the advice to call the number. It didn't require me to dial long distance, which means that this person is local. The phone took me to a cell phone service automated voice messaging system. I left a message, explained who I was, why I was concerned about my dd receiving a call about a text she had no record of having sent, either intentionally, or accidentally. I left my number, and asked him to return my call. Dd won't be walking anywhere for a while. Yikes!

[Can't get this baby's name off my mind...]

This reminds me of a teacher from my high school. His name was Mr. Mellows, and he named his daughter Marsha. Seriously. Marsha Mellows.:confused:

 

Lori

[Dh will lose his job at the end of the mo--]

:grouphug:

I'm so sorry. You've really been through a lot.

I hope things start to get better soon.:sad:

 

Lori

[I know it's not nice to make fun of people's spelling, but I can't resist this time.]

Doesn't she at least have spell check? It would not catch everything but it would catch a lot of that! :tongue_smilie:

 

I know! I have my spell check set to check every email before I send it. It's a bit of a pain, but I'm picky about spelling. I have a 12 year old son who is weak in spelling, but I spend a lot of time teaching him the importance of using the tools around him, like spell check, electronic dictionaries, asking me, etc.

 

Lori

[I know it's not nice to make fun of people's spelling, but I can't resist this time.]

My dd's synchro coach has entertained me all year with her spelling and punctuation. This one was just too funny for me not to share:

 

"oh its E___ S___, I probibly spelt it wrong. Im hoping she was regestered I will look right now. she compeated figures and will be compeating a solo this season."

 

:lol::lol:

Really, I'm not making fun of her in a mean spirited way. She freely admits that she's a poor speller. Both of her parents are public school teachers, and she herself is an early childhood educator. I've encouraged her to send her emails to me so that I can proofread them for her. As a director of the club, I think it's important to have a professional image in any club communication. Unfortunately, she hasn't taken me up on my offer, and most of her emails are much like the one above.

 

Even though I'm not trying to be mean, I fully expect some sort of weird payback, like having someone detect a spelling error in this post.:tongue_smilie:

 

Lori

[If a person receives government assistance...]

I once had someone tell me that he understood the tithe to be 10% of our increase, and that we were to give according to our increase and not our income. In his understanding of the tithe, unless your net worth was increasing, there would be nothing to tithe from.

 

I haven't spent much time researching this, since I'm more inclined toward the New Testament model of giving, rather than tithing.

 

ETA: My point is, if you are on gov't assistance, your wealth is not increasing, and there is not a tenth to give.

 

Lori

[favorite book for 2-3yo girl?!]

I really like The Very Hungry Caterpillar by Eric Carle and Chicka Chicka Boom Boom by Bill Martin Jr.

 

Lori

[Will this paragraph in my Christmas letter offend people?]

I think your paragraph is beautiful and obviously is very heartfelt. I think that you and I would be wonderful Christian sisters to each other, and that we would have a lot in common, if we lived close together.

 

 

 

Carol, you are so kind. I have no doubt that you and I would get along well. Too bad we live so far apart.:)

 

Lori

[Will this paragraph in my Christmas letter offend people?]

I appreciate every comment that each of you has contributed - even though some things were harder to read than others:001_unsure:. I'm either going to leave it out completely, or just take a few of your editing suggestions.

 

This paragraph makes up about one third of the letter. The rest of the letter is quite brief, with basic facts and updates about the kids and life. I see now that this paragraph really doesn't belong in the letter. I think it was just something I needed to articulate for myself, and the letter became my vehicle for expression. I'm so glad I got feedback from the "hive" before sending the letter. As always, I learn so much from the many diverse perspectives represented on this board.

 

Thank you!

Lori

[Will this paragraph in my Christmas letter offend people?]

Why?

 

I can't say that I'm offended by that paragraph but I wouldn't include it. There's a preachiness to it that comes across as rather annoying. Usually I choose a religious-themed Christmas card and for me that's authentic enough.

 

Where does this need to show our real/authentic selves come from anyway? In general, it seems that there are too many people who want to "tell all" or at least way more than most people are interested in. Maybe this is why I don't understand things like Twitter. :D

 

I suppose my desire to be "authentic" is because I'm writing the letter to people who are our family and friends. Although distance keeps us from seeing each other, they are people who care about us, and who we care about. If it was a letter going out to clients in our business, then of course I'd keep things on a less personal level. Hope that answers your question - unless it was just a rhetorical question.:001_smile:

 

Lori

[Will this paragraph in my Christmas letter offend people?]

I wouldn't be offended exactly - more exasperated. I would feel that I was being preached at and it would make me less likely to want to spend time with you, for fear of being buttonholed. I'm quite secure in my atheism, but I'd rather not spend time (forgive my honesty) being pitied for my wrongheadedness.

 

I do understand that the paragraph is kindly meant. I wouldn't send it though.

 

Best wishes

 

Laura

 

This is the type of feedback I was hoping for. Writing these words was very therapeutic for me, but sending them might lead to huge misunderstanding. The last thing I would want would be the impression of my "pity for wrongheadedness".:tongue_smilie: Thank you for being honest about how it might come across.

 

Lori

[Will this paragraph in my Christmas letter offend people?]

Thanks for all the great input. I made changes to this letter days ago, and cringe every time a new comment bumps this thread back to the front of the line.

I've deleted my original post. I'm thankful that posting here gave me a chance to edit my letter before sending it, and potentially offending people who I care about.

 

Thanks,

Lori

[Question about God and babies]

O.k. this may seem like an ingnorant question to some of you but I really have been thinking about this for some time.

Would God tell you not to have a baby if you are considering it? We have thought about it for some time and each time we are at that *point* I start freaking out-I mean really freaking out like super scared. I wondering if it was Satan trying to convince me this wrong to do and in doing so bring me farther away from the will of God, but I wonder? Is it God trying to tell me something? I've prayed about it and even this morning I prayed and felt like God placed on my heart that he wouldn't give me anything I couldn't handle...but is that the same thing as his blessing to do this? Is there anywhere in the Bible that God has told people not to have children? And where is it in the Bible where it says he doesn't give us more than we can handle? Is that really in scripture or just what people say?

What do you think?

 

Do you want another baby? God has given you the gift of free will. The decision is yours. You will be the one who will live with the consequences of that decision. I don't say this to disrespect your desire to "do God's will", but rather to remind you that making your own choices is part of His plan/will. Neither decision is necessarily right or wrong (I suppose there are some open womb advocates who would disagree with that, so maybe they'll weigh in).

 

I have four children. After three, my dh and I were quite happy to be done. When the youngest was two, I started to really want one more. It took a lot to talk dh into having another baby, but he finally said, "If you're happy, I'm happy." I would never trade my youngest, but she has been my most difficult child in many ways. I have less energy to parent her than I had with the others (I was 35 when she was born). My life would have been easier if I'd stopped with three. That said, I have no regrets. I'm living with the consequence of my actions, and if I had ten more children, I'd find a way to care for them the best I could, even though it would be quite overwhelming for me.

 

Just my 2 cents,

Lori

[Would you eat this?]

I'm on a diet, so I decided to treat myself to some mahi mahi (fish) at a cost of $11.00 for two fillets. When I unpacked my groceries, I didn't see the bag with the fish, and it was left out all night. I didn't notice it until 3:30 pm the following day. It was frozen when I brought it home, and packaged in a vacuum sealed bag.

 

So, should I eat it? It's only for me, so I wouldn't be poisoning any family members.:tongue_smilie:

 

Lori

["Tell Me More" for 2nd language: Has anybody used this?]

I'm wondering if anybody has had experience with Tell Me More for 2nd language with their high school student. I'd like to hear about any pros and cons.

 

Thanks,

Lori

[Getting children/teens to take initiative ...]

:lurk5:

[Looking for LoF Beginning Alg. schedule.]

We use this, but I don't have a schedule. I just have my daughter work through a few lessons a day. We just move onto the next lesson when she is done and gets it.

 

Math is sometimes one of those tricky things for us to schedule. If we have an issue in an erea... we stay in that area longer, so I no longer schedule lessons. Its just a given we do math daily. :)

 

Lisa~

 

Thanks. That's what we have been doing so far. I guess I was wondering how quickly he'll get through this text, and whether or not I'll be starting the next text before the end of the year.

 

I was able to find a breakdown of lessons in the Home Companion, so that helps.

 

Lori

[Looking for LoF Beginning Alg. schedule.]

Does anybody have a schedule they'd be willing to share? My 13 year old is working through this text, and it would be nice to have a bit of a plan as he progresses. Has anybody already done this?

 

Thanks,

Lori